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As A Married Man, Do You Sometimes Dream Of Leaving Your Family & Disappearing? - Family (4) - Nairaland

Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / As A Married Man, Do You Sometimes Dream Of Leaving Your Family & Disappearing? (25727 Views)

My Cousin Who Got Married Last Year July Is Actually Thinking Of Leaving / My Boyfriend Is On The Verge Of Leaving Me. Help! / My cousin who got married this year July is actually thinking of leaving the man (2) (3) (4)

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Re: As A Married Man, Do You Sometimes Dream Of Leaving Your Family & Disappearing? by tiswell(m): 3:40pm On Feb 14, 2023
Wawelexy:
To me, I see that man as a coward!!! Why not brace up and be brave to let your partner (the mother of your kids) know you are not feeling her anymore, tell her what the issue is and if no changes, tell her straight that you want to quit but still will be responsible for your kids welfare... I think that's better than running into the thin air like a car exhaust...

Do you even have the idea of what would have ran through the mind of your family, wife and even your kids for that period of 3 months? How do you want the kids to see their father? A coward? An irresponsible man who runs away from his burdens? An unfaithful man? The list goes on and on... As a kid, I can't even forgive such father... cos if you can do this now for an excuse as flimsy as this, then my future isn't save with you when bigger challenges shows up...
shattap!

trash like this is the reason most men die prematurely in marriages.

Most Nigerian married men are seriously suffering emotional blackmail from their ruth.less naija wives. sad
Re: As A Married Man, Do You Sometimes Dream Of Leaving Your Family & Disappearing? by Microwhy: 3:41pm On Feb 14, 2023
Kobojunkie:
Any man who enters voluntarily into a hypogamous union with a woman submits himself to being users for financial security by the woman. So please stop this nonsense abeg! undecided
I repeat again, except you're married, else you'll still come to the realisation that everything you're saying is a trash. Financial security is different from financial responsibilities.
Just keep quite if you lack Comprehension.
Re: As A Married Man, Do You Sometimes Dream Of Leaving Your Family & Disappearing? by tiswell(m): 3:41pm On Feb 14, 2023
Kobojunkie:
1. Regardless of the way he claims he felt, he committed a crime - marriage abandonment--- and the wife ought to have him charged for such foolishness. undecided

2. Regardless of reason or excuse, it is a crime punishable by jail term. undecided
I know you will be here to sp!t trash as usual
Re: As A Married Man, Do You Sometimes Dream Of Leaving Your Family & Disappearing? by Nobody: 3:42pm On Feb 14, 2023
Thegoodone13:
Honestly, I'm in this situation now. I left my house but I find it difficult to stay more than two weeks because I love my children and my wife off their phone in order not to be able to reach them. I love my wife but she doesn't love me but she is using me .


How is she using you?


Care to educate us?

Thanks
Re: As A Married Man, Do You Sometimes Dream Of Leaving Your Family & Disappearing? by Ofadaman(m): 3:42pm On Feb 14, 2023
Most marriages are because of the kids, if you scan through 100s of after marriage pictures ,very few of the men are happy. They just abiding because of the kids.

In the end at home ,they are nothing at home except for what they bring to the table. A man has nothing to hold onto , no appreciation nothing, a bad wife will turn them against the kids and never remember any single thing they did, it's a tuff world for men.

So if you're a man, never fail to find time to enjoy life, fvk enuf kuntus while you're alive, drink ,party and flex life because that's all there is, in the end🤕, you die off with nothing no let blood pressure kill you o

3 Likes

Re: As A Married Man, Do You Sometimes Dream Of Leaving Your Family & Disappearing? by Quebec91(m): 3:43pm On Feb 14, 2023
cheesy
Zonefree:

The story legit, trust me.

[b][/b]
She didn't file for missing person cos she never loved him. The reason the man disembarked from that hell of a marriage.


The truth is 97.689% of men married to Nigerian girls are going through alot. Some are living in self denial while the courageous ones are searching for ways to quit.

I pray for the souls of all married men in Nigeria, may God in his infinite mercy console and comfort you people.
Amen.
Re: As A Married Man, Do You Sometimes Dream Of Leaving Your Family & Disappearing? by tiswell(m): 3:43pm On Feb 14, 2023
Cutehector:
Disappearing aint cool in my opinion. Secondly, people must do all due diligence before getting married so that they can know why this person is marrying them.

Be bold to ask questions. Why are you marrying me? Observe patterns too, they do not lie. If he or she is obviously asking you for money all the time, then it means you are their ticket to financial freedom.

If they want you to do certain things that they themselves cannot do if they have money, then that should give you a redflag.


The other day, a lady asked me to send someone money and i had to inquire why she needed me to send money to a stranger, she didnt give me any tangible reason and i told her i'm sorry, i cant afford to send that amount of money now, she picked offence.

Lmao. Ontop my own money kwa? Why not vex for yourself that doesn't have money too?

At the end of the day, please, marry sensible people. Being a christian/muslim ain't enough.

I want to know if you are really sensible upstairs or are in control of your emotions. This alone matters to me.
you haven't met a diehard pretentious woman.

Especially, the single mothers and the desperate old single
Re: As A Married Man, Do You Sometimes Dream Of Leaving Your Family & Disappearing? by MoneyMustBMade(m): 3:44pm On Feb 14, 2023
When men learn how to choose partner base on compatibility and character all this will reduce.

Look away from these things when choosing a partner coz is a lifetime something

Love I called this lost
Beauty I called this decieving
Money I called this cover up

Go for a woman you can work the remaining life together

Look at character of a woman whem choosing one
Run away from feminist coz she can never be loyal to her man

Last of all check your self well as a man. If you're ok your self. Coz men too have thier character issue too,.men can be damage too just like women.

8 Likes 2 Shares

Re: As A Married Man, Do You Sometimes Dream Of Leaving Your Family & Disappearing? by tiswell(m): 3:46pm On Feb 14, 2023
TimT:
Lol...The reason why I love listening to Ups and Downs in Mariage life is because every relationship has a unique problem.....
In this case, it's already obvious the man is running away from his problems/responsibility.....
How could you as a man lie to your wife about going to work and travel out OMG!!!!!!
Okay let's agree with the man that the wife is not a good person, how about the children? Why can't you take the kids and run to anywhere
Well naturally, Everyman can father a child but NOT EVERY MAN CAN BE A DAD TO A CHILD....
In my opinion, let him go forever.....
If he needs kids, he is still potent, and I'm sure there are women there; so he can conceive...
and what happens to the kids he already has with the wife?
Re: As A Married Man, Do You Sometimes Dream Of Leaving Your Family & Disappearing? by zedegit: 3:46pm On Feb 14, 2023
Jennyclay:
Biko, Keep shut!

Why are you men so confused undecided. She declared her husband missing, you said she never loved him.

I'm sure if she did not declare her husband missing, you'll still use derogatory words on her. You men are really confused oo undecided

The wife even asked where she went wrong in the marriage so could adjust. The man is just a randy irresponsible man!!

Confused irresponsible men everywhere!! Shior!!

They could have discussed it though.
Re: As A Married Man, Do You Sometimes Dream Of Leaving Your Family & Disappearing? by VeeVeeMyLuv(m): 3:46pm On Feb 14, 2023
Klass99:
The post below from 2021, accurately captures what I am unable to articulate well.

Feel caged?

Single & married life is totally different at opposite poles

Problem arise when you want to continue to live single life while married.

It is a serious business. Great careers have been sacrificed for marriage
Re: As A Married Man, Do You Sometimes Dream Of Leaving Your Family & Disappearing? by Sarsaproko: 3:49pm On Feb 14, 2023
Kobojunkie:
1. Regardless of the way he claims he felt, he committed a crime - marriage abandonment--- and the wife ought to have him charged for such foolishness. undecided

2. Regardless of reason or excuse, it is a crime punishable by jail term. undecided

Where?
Re: As A Married Man, Do You Sometimes Dream Of Leaving Your Family & Disappearing? by Dangrace01: 3:50pm On Feb 14, 2023
Germi9:
I just did bro and she’s been texting and we have been raining insults on eachother grin

Are you joking or for real.

Today is val how can you abandon your family
Re: As A Married Man, Do You Sometimes Dream Of Leaving Your Family & Disappearing? by aestake: 3:51pm On Feb 14, 2023
Klass99:


I think women feel this way more than men do, because we have been mostly sold a pipe dream (as women) that marriage and kids bring joy and fufilment. And without these things we will be forever doomed, unhappy and unfulfilled.

So, what do most of us do? We actively pursue this dream or mirage of bliss and fulfilment only to get it, then realize, we are not bursting with joy, we are not happy or fulfilled, like we were told we would be.

Then we want out, but we are afraid of what people will say, the stigma of divorce or being called a bad mother who cannot endure for the sake of her children.

Women are not happy naturally.
Re: As A Married Man, Do You Sometimes Dream Of Leaving Your Family & Disappearing? by Kobojunkie: 3:53pm On Feb 14, 2023
Microwhy:
â–  I repeat again, except you're married, else you'll still come to the realisation that everything you're saying is a trash. Financial security is different from financial responsibilities.
â–  Just keep quite if you lack Comprehension.
1. Any man who enters voluntarily into a hypogamous union without a gun to his head submits to being financially responsible for another capable adult whom he takes as a wife knowing fully well that what he submits to is a life as her source of financial security. So forgive me if i still think you are foolishly searching for excuses here. undecided

2. I am afraid I am not the one struggling here to comprehend this as it presents itself. Essentially if you do not want to be financial security for a woman, commonsense is to marry a woman who is financially secure. Only a dolt would marry a financially insecure woman only to then turn around to claim she is using him for financial security....well duh! undecided

1 Like

Re: As A Married Man, Do You Sometimes Dream Of Leaving Your Family & Disappearing? by guysbewise: 3:54pm On Feb 14, 2023
Franzinni:
Women take note... All the cho cho cho you like to do in your home, always trying to out talk your husband, soliciting advice from your hair dresser and your pastor and other idiots who are single or in a hellish relationship, hellbent on bringing you down to thier wrenched level ... Take note. Or you will become the example...

There is little or no benefit in marriage for men and most men stay with you ONLY becasue of the kids... They will endure your BS till they develop stroke and die unappreciated.

Marriage is a scam... That is why they give you certificate without exam.

Marriage is a BIG SCAM, women just like to use it to get a good loving man to have kids that will look after the women when she is old and once the woman has succeeded in pressuring the man into having the number of kids she wants then only GOD can save that man from that woman.

I now believe marriage is an institution created by satan.

THUNDER FIRE anyone that quotes me with insults
Re: As A Married Man, Do You Sometimes Dream Of Leaving Your Family & Disappearing? by Germi9: 3:54pm On Feb 14, 2023
Dangrace01:


Are you joking or for real.

Today is val how can you abandon your family
Its a joke bro
Re: As A Married Man, Do You Sometimes Dream Of Leaving Your Family & Disappearing? by Kobojunkie: 3:56pm On Feb 14, 2023
Sarsaproko:
Where?
Check your local laws. undecided
Re: As A Married Man, Do You Sometimes Dream Of Leaving Your Family & Disappearing? by Solocoin: 3:57pm On Feb 14, 2023
The man is simply an irresponsible man who's looking for excuse to go after everything on skirts. He didn't say the wife do anything but he feel the reason the wife marry him is because of financial security maybe she's not working if you look into it very well he was still the one who stop her from working.
Some of this people behaving like this don't always think about old age. When old age come now, you'll see him going back to the same woman to beg for forgiveness, just to have someone who will look after him.
He's doing what he's doing because of what his friends has been telling him. Maybe he was a man who was faithful to his wife and also go back house after work and his friends start talking to him and calling him woman wrapper. He just wake up and come up with this cheap excuse.

2 Likes

Re: As A Married Man, Do You Sometimes Dream Of Leaving Your Family & Disappearing? by Klass99(f): 4:00pm On Feb 14, 2023
cheesy

8 Likes 1 Share

Re: As A Married Man, Do You Sometimes Dream Of Leaving Your Family & Disappearing? by malahbu(m): 4:01pm On Feb 14, 2023
An irresponsible coward
Wawelexy:
To me, I see that man as a coward!!! Why not brace up and be brave to let your partner (the mother of your kids) know you are not feeling her anymore, tell her what the issue is and if no changes, tell her straight that you want to quit but still will be responsible for your kids welfare... I think that's better than running into the thin air like a car exhaust...

Do you even have the idea of what would have ran through the mind of your family, wife and even your kids for that period of 3 months? How do you want the kids to see their father? A coward? An irresponsible man who runs away from his burdens? An unfaithful man? The list goes on and on... As a kid, I can't even forgive such father... cos if you can do this now for an excuse as flimsy as this, then my future isn't save with you when bigger challenges shows up...

1 Like

Re: As A Married Man, Do You Sometimes Dream Of Leaving Your Family & Disappearing? by Elidrisy20: 4:03pm On Feb 14, 2023
Yes I do somethings,most especially if I remember say na buhari be our presido & emefiele na him be CBN mafia
Re: As A Married Man, Do You Sometimes Dream Of Leaving Your Family & Disappearing? by Faposky95: 4:04pm On Feb 14, 2023
Look at the bigger pic
You could cull up many -a-reasons ...why...?
First, we're human. The man jus snapped....and fled...maybe for life
Imagine snapping and molesting.... you'll see the news and ppl here will go ballistic.
In the least, he called jus 3 months later, and asked about the kids.....
When there's life there's hope
Thank heavens he was not another died on her arms or bed case
Let's pray for guidance
There ain't no handbook on how you'll live everyday.
We're all on Grace
Re: As A Married Man, Do You Sometimes Dream Of Leaving Your Family & Disappearing? by sukkot: 4:04pm On Feb 14, 2023
Franzinni:
Women take note... All the cho cho cho you like to do in your home, always trying to out talk your husband, soliciting advice from your hair dresser and your pastor and other idiots who are single or in a hellish relationship, hellbent on bringing you down to thier wrenched level ... Take note. Or you will become the example...

There is little or no benefit in marriage for men and most men stay with you ONLY becasue of the kids... They will endure your BS till they develop stroke and die unappreciated.

Marriage is a scam... That is why they give you certificate without exam.
grin grin grin grin grin grin
Re: As A Married Man, Do You Sometimes Dream Of Leaving Your Family & Disappearing? by Amopeekun(f): 4:05pm On Feb 14, 2023
Very true!
Klass99:


I think women feel this way more than men do, because we have been mostly sold a pipe dream (as women) that marriage and kids bring joy and fufilment. And without these things we will be forever doomed, unhappy and unfulfilled.

So, what do most of us do? We actively pursue this dream or mirage of bliss and fulfilment only to get it, then realize, we are not bursting with joy, we are not happy or fulfilled, like we were told we would be.

Then we want out, but we are afraid of what people will say, the stigma of divorce or being called a bad mother who cannot endure for the sake of her children.

1 Like

Re: As A Married Man, Do You Sometimes Dream Of Leaving Your Family & Disappearing? by sylve11: 4:06pm On Feb 14, 2023
Persephone1:
Nigerian men do ask questions but only about what a lady is wearing and when she will be visiting grin cheesy grin


Bia, be careful. grin grin grin cool
Re: As A Married Man, Do You Sometimes Dream Of Leaving Your Family & Disappearing? by Klass99(f): 4:08pm On Feb 14, 2023
Amopeekun:
Very true!

Lol wink

1 Like

Re: As A Married Man, Do You Sometimes Dream Of Leaving Your Family & Disappearing? by marsup: 4:09pm On Feb 14, 2023
jeff1607:
After 3months she decided to file for a missing person! Your own husband?


This story doesn’t add up
It was a debate on Twitter... The man in question is from Kenya... That's not the way the story goes... Op twisted it.
Re: As A Married Man, Do You Sometimes Dream Of Leaving Your Family & Disappearing? by Kobojunkie: 4:13pm On Feb 14, 2023
marsup:
It was a debate on Twitter... The man in question is from Kenya... That's not the way the story goes... Op twisted it.
Marriage abandonments are pretty much common place in Southern Nigeria. in Northern Nigeria, marriage abandonment remains rare, given that Northerners are accustomed to seeking divorce when they feel it is necessary, unlike southerners. undecided

2 Likes

Re: As A Married Man, Do You Sometimes Dream Of Leaving Your Family & Disappearing? by africandollar: 4:17pm On Feb 14, 2023
Zonefree:

I don't indulge scumbàgs any longer.

but you just did bro! angry

1 Like

Re: As A Married Man, Do You Sometimes Dream Of Leaving Your Family & Disappearing? by Judybash93(m): 4:17pm On Feb 14, 2023
LilMissFavvy:
Even the story says that the man was always out late in the night drinking with his friends. That shows he was never a responsible husband. Some of these men always think that the grass is green at the other side. In my opinion, I don't think the woman lost anything good, cuz he was never a responsible man. She should give him time to return home, then if he doesn't, she will surely move on and be fine.
The story sounds like fiction and i don't know the man neither do i know the woman but once the house becomes too hot for a man, he'll hardly think of returning home to a wife that either berates him or doesn't have anything good to say! Men do not talk much about how they feel in relation to how they're treated by women, so, i guess he chose the easy way out. I'm not in support of what he did because kids are involved but he did what he did and that's it
Re: As A Married Man, Do You Sometimes Dream Of Leaving Your Family & Disappearing? by sukkot: 4:22pm On Feb 14, 2023
Zonefree:

The story legit, trust me.

[/b]
She didn't file for missing person cos she never loved him. The reason the man disembarked from that hell of a marriage.


[b]The truth is 97.689% of men married to Nigerian girls are going through alot
. Some are living in self denial while the courageous ones are searching for ways to quit.

I pray for the souls of all married men in Nigeria, may God in his infinite mercy console and comfort you people.
Amen.
shocked shocked shocked 97%

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