.

Please leave politics out of this thread, I typed all these in tears. If you don’t know how I can go about this then quietly leave the thread pleas and let me take advise from others. I constantly used unconsciously in my post because I’m not in control of these behavior

It will get better... don't be too hard on urself. Give it time

Killbillz:
It will get better... don't be too hard on urself. Give it time

When will it get better? How can I Stop all these.

IyaebeTheGreat:
I think she has noticed all of these (especially how my countenance do change immediately she’s coming close) and she has started minding her space gradually. I’ve never felt this bad in a long time and I seriously do not know how to go about this. Please how do I overcome this phobia(abi fears) for albinos ? What went wrong and how do I permanently correct all of these?

Usually, such behavior on your part is born of ignorance so spending a couple of hours on YouTube educating yourself about the sickness -- what it is and what it is not, whether it is infectious, etc.. that might help your mind slowly rid itself of the prejudice. Basically, the more favorable information about albinos you expose yourself to, the
more your mind lifts itself out of ignorance.

As for her noticing, you may want to go to her and apologize for your behavior. That is the mature thing to do since you do admit the problem is from you in this case.

Kobojunkie:
Usually, such behavior on your part is born of ignorance so spending a couple of hours on YouTube educating yourself about the sickness -- what it is and what it is not, whether it is infectious, etc.. that might help your mind slowly rid itself of the prejudice. Basically, the more favorable information about albinos you expose yourself to, the
more your mind lifts itself out of ignorance.

As for her noticing, you may want to go to her and apologize for your behavior. That is the mature thing to do since you do admit the problem is from you in this case.

What’s going to be my excuse for my behavior towards her? Ofcourse I can’t tell her it’s the albinism, I can’t

IyaebeTheGreat:
What’s going to be my excuse for my behavior towards her?

Your ignorance, of course, which you hope to cure by learning from her.

And you are not excusing. You are confessing!

You never know, but she might end up becoming your life long best friend.

IyaebeTheGreat:
What’s going to be my excuse for my behavior towards her? Ofcourse I can’t tell her it’s the albinism, I can’t

If you want to say something to her before you have successfully deprogrammed yourself of your prejudice, you can ask her to please bear with your rude behaviour for a bit as you are working through some mental issues you find your need to take care of.

After you have successfully taken care of those mental issues, you can then open to her about what was really going on in your mind and why you had behaved as you did towards her.

Kobojunkie:
Usually, such behavior on your part is born of ignorance so spending a couple of hours on YouTube educating yourself about the sickness -- what it is and what it is not, whether it is infectious, etc.. that might help your mind slowly rid itself of the prejudice. Basically, the more favorable information about albinos you expose yourself to, the
more your mind lifts itself out of ignorance.

As for her noticing, you may want to go to her and apologize for your behavior. That is the mature thing to do since you do admit the problem is from you in this case.

I owe you another apology!

You mean I should confess to her that it’s because of her albinism that makes me avoid her? Won’t that tamper with her self esteem?

budaatum:


Your ignorance, of course, which you hope to cure by learning from her.

And you are not excusing. You are confessing!

You never know, but she might end up becoming your life long best friend.

Kobojunkie:
If you want to say something to her before you have successfully deprogrammed yourself of your prejudice, you can ask her to please bear with your rude behaviour for a bit as you are working through some mental issues you find your need to take care of.

After you have successfully taken care of those mental issues, you can then open to her about what was really going on in your mind and why you had behaved as you did towards her.

It’ll be so difficult because I don’t even want to have an idea. I feel it’s going to affect her self esteem

IyaebeTheGreat:
It’ll be so difficult because I don’t even want to have an idea. I feel it’s going to affect her self esteem

By telling her the problem is you and that you are willing to work on you in order to correct it, you help her self-esteem. I mean she already sees that you have some sort of problem with her, so the best you can do is admit to you and your upbringing being the issue, not her person. .

Kobojunkie:
By telling her the problem is you and that you are willing to work on you in order to correct it, you help her self-esteem.

Ok thanks a lot, I’ll have to be very careful on how I go about it

IyaebeTheGreat:
Ok thanks a lot, I’ll have to be very careful on how I go about it

If you sound or seem a bit too calculated in the way you present these things, you will end up hurting her. But if you are honest and accept the blame as you should, there's a chance that you make a friend or even a sister.

Kobojunkie:
If you sound or seem a bit too calculated in the way you present these things, you will end up hurting her. But if you are honest and accept the blame as you should, there's a chance that you make a friend or even a sister.

The fear of hurting her is the reason I typed that

IyaebeTheGreat:
The fear of hurting her is the reason I typed that

According to you, you already hurt her by trying to avoid her. That ship don sail!

Kobojunkie:
If you sound or seem a bit too calculated in the way you present these things, you will end up hurting her. But if you are honest and accept the blame as you should, there's a chance that you make a friend or even a sister.

I already feel like deleting this thread because of how any albino on this forum will feel . Should I delete it?

IyaebeTheGreat:
I already feel like deleting this thread because of how any albino on this forum will feel . Should I delete it?

You don't want others to learn from your mistake?

You know you can always use Report - #2 to extinguish the rude comments, right?

Kobojunkie:
According to you, you already hurt her by trying to avoid her. That ship don sail!

I feel sooooo bad. This thing started from childhood and it’s still stuck

IyaebeTheGreat:
I feel sooooo bad. This thing started from childhood and it’s still stuck

There is no such thing, as we are all designed with ability to learn new tricks until even the moment of our death.

Kobojunkie:
You don't want others to learn from your mistake?

You know you can always use Report - #2 to extinguish the rude comments, right?

Not even the rude comments (I’m used to it and they don’t get to me in any way) but the albinos that may be in this forum

Kobojunkie:
There is no such thing as we are all designed with ability to learn new tricks until even the moment of our death.

Thanks a lot, I feel a bit better.

IyaebeTheGreat:
Thanks a lot, I feel a bit better.

The world --- Nigeria even --- would be a better place if we would each work hard on ridding ourselves of our various prejudices.

IyaebeTheGreat:
You mean I should confess to her that it’s because of her albinism that makes me avoid her? Won’t that tamper with her self esteem?

No, you will not tamper with her self esteem.

In fact, by confessing your own ignorance and not hers since she's not the ignorant one here, you are tampering with your own self esteem by showing humility and the will to learn. And that tampering with your self esteem will make you grow especially since you are now going to make amends by doing the opposite of "avoid her".

Kobojunkie:
There is no such thing as we are all designed with ability to learn new tricks until even the moment of our death.

I think a comma is required.

There is no such thing, as we are all designed with ability to learn new tricks until even the moment of our death.

budaatum:


No, you will not tamper with her self esteem.

In fact, by confessing your own ignorance and not hers since she's not the ignorant one here, you are tampering with your own self esteem by showing humility and the will to learn. And that tampering with your self esteem will make you grow especially since you are now going to make amends by doing the opposite of "avoid her".

I’ve really tried to fight this thing but to put it in practice comes the wahala, i don’t know how better I can explain these things. I’m scared I may never get over this habit. Sad 😢

budaatum:


I think a comma is required.

There is no such thing, as we are all designed with ability to learn new tricks until even the moment of our death.

IyaebeTheGreat:
I’ve really tried to fight this thing but to put it in practice comes the wahala, i don’t know how better I can explain these things. I’m scared I may never get over this habit. Sad 😢

If you try hard to get over a habit that is already making you sad, you are likely to get over it so you become unsad.

As for explaining it. Ignorance. You were ignorant and should now intend to educate yourself.

In fact, take this as an opportunity to research albinism and post what you discover here. You never know, but others may learn and cure their ignorance too.

IyaebeTheGreat:
When will it get better? How can I Stop all these.

With time. Trying to rush it and force urself to adapt quickly will make it worse. It will be too obvious and u will feel terrible.

Secondly, what u can do is pinpoint exactly what the problem is. The skin color, texture/ nature? Or just based on some general assumptions. The condition isn't anything but absence of pigmentation in their skin and hair. They're just like everyone else. In wtv u do start small and give urself credit.

IyaebeTheGreat:
Right from childhood I have this very rare and strong phobia for albinos, infact I practically run on sighting them no matter who was with me. Well, I thought I’ve overcome this habit overtime until recently I found out it’s still with me. I happen to be in a place recently that involves me mingling with an albino and each time she tries to come close I unconsciously drift away immediately and would have to pinch and hold myself so as not to get noticed. I unconsciously avoid anything that’ll join us together and would made sure we are never in line doing things together, she has tried severally to come close to me but I just don’t know when I’ll stylishly dodge her and be forming busy. But I tried to be very nice to her at any given opportunity but unconsciously do that from a reasonable distance . Recently she had her birthday and I gifted her a very massive cake but unconsciously feigned sickness just to avoid some closeness that may happen during the birthday. Believe me i don’t have control when I do these things, I feel so bad and terrible after doing them. Last friday I woke up early and made up my mind that immediately I sight her that day, I’ll go give her a hug and peck her but on sighting her i didn’t even know when i started forming busy and all that. I went home and cried bitterly because she’s a very nice person. I think she has noticed all of these (especially how my countenance do change immediately she’s coming close) and she has started minding her space gradually. I’ve never felt this bad in a long time and I seriously do not know how to go about this. Please how do I overcome this phobia(abi fears) for albinos ? What went wrong and how do I permanently correct all of these?

Do you two talk over the phone? If yes explain to her how exactly it's doing you. Let her know that your heart wants to be close to her but your body isn't. Let her know that you are willing to work with her to fix this issue with you.

You need to ascertain what exactly the fear is about. That will guide to fix.

Wonders shall never end