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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / Why I Chose To Distance Myself From A Sibling (40965 Views)
Selfish Sibling Willing To Do Anything To Solely Inherit / Can One Have 4 Cars Parked At Home And Still Have A Sibling Using Keke To Work? / Should I Distance Myself From My Family? (2) (3) (4)
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Re: Why I Chose To Distance Myself From A Sibling by HaneefahRN(f): 9:48pm On Mar 31, 2023 |
SUFFERInSMILIIN: Thank you sir or ma. I still think as long as she has a valid visa and a good job in that Canada, she can do better for her parents if all what OP said is true and they have not been extorting her. She does not have to do for siblings. I am familiar with how the abroad life and bills can be. Na she know wetin dey do her where she is though. It is well 4 Likes |
Re: Why I Chose To Distance Myself From A Sibling by GudPpleG8Nation(m): 9:50pm On Mar 31, 2023 |
ZIMDRILL:That means the moment a child clocks 18years old ( he's an adult legally and naturally) he should take responsibility for his or her education and needs so that the parents can also invest in their retirement plans. You're entitled to your opinion but, sacrifices or not, we should care for the senior citizens amongst us not to talk of our parents. 6 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Why I Chose To Distance Myself From A Sibling by Weallbloom: 9:53pm On Mar 31, 2023 |
"If you know that you are going to be useless to a family, let your parents know before hand so the money used in training/feeding you can be used for farming business which will despite bad weather bring returns than on a child who feels is not obligated to support the parents who supported you all through." -- CosmicDust (Nairaland 2023). 8 Likes |
Re: Why I Chose To Distance Myself From A Sibling by HaneefahRN(f): 9:53pm On Mar 31, 2023 |
like1: I already said 'as long as'. She could share her struggles with her parents whichever one she is closer to. If they are reasonable they would not expect from her too knowing she is still finding her feet and struggling. |
Re: Why I Chose To Distance Myself From A Sibling by ZIMDRILL(m): 9:54pm On Mar 31, 2023 |
GudPpleG8Nation: Yes true, but remember while you are raising them in a good ecomomy and be wise ,you also put money aside to kick start their adult life Have heard of young adults who get lump sum from grandparents when they reach 18 or 21, thats the idea to kick start their early adulthood the same in african contest the youngest child in a family were other siblings are grown, given or his/her name appears on title deeds of the house, its a kick start in the event the parents pass away 2 Likes |
Re: Why I Chose To Distance Myself From A Sibling by Octopusssy(f): 9:54pm On Mar 31, 2023 |
CosmicDust:Na wa o. Me, I can sell the cloth off my back for my parents. The only thing I can't do for them is lay my life for them, and that is because they will lay theirs down for me before I have the chance. Some people are just not givers. She is not going to change so just do your own part and the blessings of your aged parents will fill your life. Make una forget sey una get sister for Canada and try as much as possible to make life comfortable for your parents. Stagnant water does not absorb sunlight so leave her be . She will come to her senses one day 9 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Why I Chose To Distance Myself From A Sibling by weslay: 9:55pm On Mar 31, 2023 |
To the young guys out there reading this abeg, plan for your retirement wella because somethings wen I dey read here still dey fear me 6 Likes |
Re: Why I Chose To Distance Myself From A Sibling by lexilexi: 9:59pm On Mar 31, 2023 |
Same thing my elder sister does. She's been in the U.S for over 6 years but hadn't sent a pin to us here in naija. Tho I ve taken her out of my mind and I ain't expecting a dime from her 3 Likes |
Re: Why I Chose To Distance Myself From A Sibling by frozen70(f): 10:00pm On Mar 31, 2023 |
CosmicDust: I think you people are expecting so much from her because she is in Canada That she is abroad and she is not fort coming on your requests and expectations from her doesn't mean she has neglected her family I will advise you guys to bear with her while you stop expecting much from her No one knows her situation over there and if she is actually making progress No child will love to see her parents suffering or stranded at old age If you stop talking with her, it's OK but anytime she calls you, pick that call and listen to what she will be saying Overseas are not really what we all think 4 Likes |
Re: Why I Chose To Distance Myself From A Sibling by GudPpleG8Nation(m): 10:01pm On Mar 31, 2023 |
blackgold2018: Why insulting the op bro? The lady in question is his blood sister which means he knows what he's saying. Did he complained about the lady not taking care of him? He is saying the lady is not taking responsibility on their parents. No matter what she's doing in Canada, the first people to know what she's passing through is her parents, so for the parents to be angry with her means they know she's doing well. 6 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Why I Chose To Distance Myself From A Sibling by BigDawsNet: 10:04pm On Mar 31, 2023 |
CosmicDust: I really don't want to comment on this but I understand what you going tru and I had to say a little few things... Before I moved to the states.... I have uncle we share the same surname... they are more than family... they are British citizens but this people only gave me 2k.. since hav recognised them as family... one of them will even send merry Christmas message to you... and wait to reply or message you again in the next year Christmas... if u like message him till repture shows... he will never reply.. the same uncle will say.. me I no get shi shi to carry u come abroad... while people dat knew him knows how successful dis man his over there... so it was clear.. he doesn't wanna help... He was Suprised when I called him and luckly he picked.. WhatsApp video, I said "Uncle I'm now in the States" he dint believe it... he was fake_smiling and that was the last day we had a conversation... So the point of the matter is that, Elder sister or not.. if she doesn't wanna help you guys... that should not be the end of everything... let me tell u... if ur sis no dey Canada... you go reach ur destination in life oh bro.. So pls don't think about it... just manage and take care of your self and ur mum, with ur junior one... belive in God! Pray and work hard... One day! Almighty God will settle your case! Trust yourself and trust God... Pls don't fight her and don't neglect her.. just keep pushing for ur own hustle and career, and I can tell you... one day you will smile... Finally, we dint hear from ur sis side... truly she may be struggling... Canada is not like US where you can just get a good job without a visa or degree.. it's a land of opportunity... the country is to big to monitor who no get status... But in Canada.. if one or two paper no complete... the person go see shege oh.. that's how Canada system works... so pls confirm if shes on citizenship or PR without any issue... she may be going tru things she can't tell u guys... so pls think abt it in dat angle God bless you 6 Likes |
Re: Why I Chose To Distance Myself From A Sibling by CosmicDust: 10:07pm On Mar 31, 2023 |
9japride: Your last statement is more than true sir 3 Likes |
Re: Why I Chose To Distance Myself From A Sibling by CosmicDust: 10:08pm On Mar 31, 2023 |
EkoErrands: Negative. By the way, the case here is on helping the parents. |
Re: Why I Chose To Distance Myself From A Sibling by lilyheaven: 10:09pm On Mar 31, 2023 |
Please don’t stay child free, your case maybe different Klass99: |
Re: Why I Chose To Distance Myself From A Sibling by CosmicDust: 10:10pm On Mar 31, 2023 |
akinade28: Thanks so much for this. ,👍🏾 1 Like |
Re: Why I Chose To Distance Myself From A Sibling by CosmicDust: 10:12pm On Mar 31, 2023 |
Skybleu: For my mum and dad, i will sacrifice for them. Seems you must have lived a loveless life. 1 Like |
Re: Why I Chose To Distance Myself From A Sibling by Allisgud: 10:12pm On Mar 31, 2023 |
Ever Since I saw Nigerians sleeping on cartons under bridge abroad,I stop disturbing my uncle for money,cos I don't even know if he is homeless also 4 Likes |
Re: Why I Chose To Distance Myself From A Sibling by CosmicDust: 10:14pm On Mar 31, 2023 |
oluwaseyi0: You must have had a very disturbed childhood with parental absence. Hence everything i wrote makes no sense to you. 1 Like |
Re: Why I Chose To Distance Myself From A Sibling by intruder15(m): 10:15pm On Mar 31, 2023 |
Darammliveth: Same here o. The matter shock me. |
Re: Why I Chose To Distance Myself From A Sibling by RPG2020(m): 10:17pm On Mar 31, 2023 |
OP delete her sharp sharp no dulling who wan help person no dey stress person i deleted mine 10 years ago still counting 3 Likes |
Re: Why I Chose To Distance Myself From A Sibling by CosmicDust: 10:17pm On Mar 31, 2023 |
Mumusaphire: I have learnt that Evil people always look for an excuse to defend their deeds. That guy is not someone to meet. 1 Like |
Re: Why I Chose To Distance Myself From A Sibling by webbman90: 10:18pm On Mar 31, 2023 |
LikeAking: Bros someone with PHD in Canada can be struggling. I have seen a lot of them. The truth is going to Canada doesn't guarantee success nah GRACE. Am sure she's paying bills here and there. Even if I check myself to be sincere, there is no even $55 to send back home. If I do send it's because I want to increase my indebtedness. I think you should take a chill pill. Her QBESE fit pass wetin you dey think. 2 Likes |
Re: Why I Chose To Distance Myself From A Sibling by Klass99(f): 10:19pm On Mar 31, 2023 |
2 Likes |
Re: Why I Chose To Distance Myself From A Sibling by Clash01: 10:19pm On Mar 31, 2023 |
xavuv: One useless uncle spotted. 2 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Why I Chose To Distance Myself From A Sibling by Oboto700(m): 10:21pm On Mar 31, 2023 |
xavuv:keep quiet.. you think working abroad is like here in Nigeria? His sister is being wicked 3 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Why I Chose To Distance Myself From A Sibling by CosmicDust: 10:22pm On Mar 31, 2023 |
like1: I'm saying she's not helping her parents and your very intelligent brains interpretes it as entitlement mentality. Hope you are of no use to your parents like she is. 2 Likes |
Re: Why I Chose To Distance Myself From A Sibling by Nyanabo(m): 10:22pm On Mar 31, 2023 |
Have you taken time to know how your sister is really doing over there and not so arrogating 'doing very well' to her? There may be more to this story from her end. And I refuse to judge her without hearing from her. Talk to her before coming to such conclusion. After doing that then you actions would be justified. Life is also hard for people over there so kiny not just assume. 2 Likes |
Re: Why I Chose To Distance Myself From A Sibling by intruder15(m): 10:23pm On Mar 31, 2023 |
xavuv: Let's be real with our analysis. The minimum wage in Canada is about 15 dollars per hour (120 dollars per 8hrs) which is about 55,000 naira. What this means is that even if she is a cleaner or dish washer, she will make 55k naira equivalence in a day. The OP said she went there for Masters. The worst scenario is that she didn't graduate. Meaning that she will still earn something reasonable as a BSC holder. Guy, no matter how you want check am, the sister de Bleep up big time. The OP should also lower their expectations. Nobody owe one anything. 5 Likes |
Re: Why I Chose To Distance Myself From A Sibling by Truthshotcrazy: 10:24pm On Mar 31, 2023 |
Re: Why I Chose To Distance Myself From A Sibling by CosmicDust: 10:24pm On Mar 31, 2023 |
like1: If you can't give a constructive contribution, it'll be better you keep mute than be a repugnant nuisance. 1 Like |
Re: Why I Chose To Distance Myself From A Sibling by ZIMDRILL(m): 10:25pm On Mar 31, 2023 |
SUFFERInSMILIIN: how does a white man's debt is transfered to a black nigerian The main issue people, travel with wrong visa and they get stuck. People make the mistake to be just in US or UK without the right visa, once there are in reality hits you stopped to progress becoz not having papers, you cant hustle like what you do in your home country, the end, you end up picking jobs that are not liked by locals and worse you are underpaid with long working hours if not with 2 or 3 jobs to makes up average weekly working hours Aslong you are in foreign land and illegal especially the west world your bound for low paying jobs, How does a white debt end up being a nigerian man/woman debt? illegal immigrants are cheap labout |
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