How & Why do siblings fall apart? - Family (3) - Nairaland
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| Re: How & Why do siblings fall apart? by alizma: 11:33am On May 07, 2023 |
There are many reasons for why siblings fall apart but one thing I know is the easiest way to avoid falling apart. You can avoid this by technically staying apart from the onset, I don't mean you should hate your siblings or parents but to your family, try to be different from the onset but deep inside your heart, be one with all. This may be a little bit confusing but if you can understand it, it will help you. If your family is doing a thing that doesn't go well with you, politely but firmly tell them you are not in irrespective of who initiate it, if it goes your way, be involved irrespective of who initiate it. With this, you are kind of a stand out person who cannot be accused of avoiding the family or so. Gradually they get the feeling that you are kind of different from others which indeed, no two individuals are the same. We start having issues when we tend to adjust too much to what others want. Lest I forget, don't depend on anyone for your survival too, let them always see themselves as your helper not your saviour, that is, in most of your breakthrough, you start the journey, no matter how small before you ask for there help. If a man is the one to tell you to go to school, buy forms for you and pay your tuition, my brother, he will have hug feelings of you being indebted to him etc 8 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: How & Why do siblings fall apart? by Allisgud: 11:35am On May 07, 2023 |
Make I use davido do example U see person like davido,if assuming he didn't huzzle to make his money though with the push of his father,if to say he just sat down and be waiting for inheritance from the father,there will be no respect for him,u will see how the siblings will hate him stylishly,even that his uncle,no quarrel is because everybody has been settled 3 Likes |
| Re: How & Why do siblings fall apart? by cassyrooy(m): 11:36am On May 07, 2023 |
yazga:No be ordinary something, once one of the siblings foo reasons starts bullying, embarrassing, abusing physically, mentally and emotionally, thwarting the hardwork of his/her siblings, cutting ties becomes inevitable. 3 Likes |
| Re: How & Why do siblings fall apart? by ItisWell22(f): 11:36am On May 07, 2023 |
occfx: This! 💯 5 Likes |
| Re: How & Why do siblings fall apart? by sunnymighty(m): 11:37am On May 07, 2023 |
I am the only Male and the second born, gave my all when they all got my married even to their spouses and when it was my turn, they hated my wife coupled with undue interference in my marriage, the last straw was when my elder sister's friend had the gut to report my wife to my sister because they are friends, despite the fact that we are few houses apart, what effrontery! the fool is a divorcee who brings men into her own house. 14 Likes |
| Re: How & Why do siblings fall apart? by hadjipapiey(m): 11:43am On May 07, 2023 |
Hamachi: Apt and precise 4 Likes |
| Re: How & Why do siblings fall apart? by Germi9: 11:51am On May 07, 2023 |
Truth is that we all became sibling’s by chance 10 Likes |
| Re: How & Why do siblings fall apart? by IyaTola: 11:53am On May 07, 2023 |
youngzeal1:Share you never know who could learn and profer solution to you 1 Like |
| Re: How & Why do siblings fall apart? by Nobody: 11:55am On May 07, 2023 |
I’m actually planning on kidnapping my elder brother and his useless wife  hand must touch them4 Likes |
| Re: How & Why do siblings fall apart? by saajus: 12:01pm On May 07, 2023 |
Aside from the common ones ppl here have mentioned, fake Prophecy is another major one causing issues recently. If you visit Prophet at any slightest problem, he would detach you from ppl that may want to put some senses into your brain by using fake prophecy. Be careful. 13 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: How & Why do siblings fall apart? by Onyinyechiugly1(f): 12:03pm On May 07, 2023 |
Do siblings fall apart? There may be misunderstanding, but falling apart shouldn't be an option. If my siblings offend me, I have many ways of sorting it out, depending on the offense....one of such, is ignoring the person for some time, until I feel better. 4 Likes |
| Re: How & Why do siblings fall apart? by Sermwell(m): 12:03pm On May 07, 2023 |
Day169:Whenever people are having a decent discourse with you, don't drag religion or bible into it. Not everyone is a Christian. Alot of people don't even know who is Cain or Abel  5 Likes |
| Re: How & Why do siblings fall apart? by kpezi: 12:03pm On May 07, 2023 |
Praisepriest: |
| Re: How & Why do siblings fall apart? by juman(m): 12:04pm On May 07, 2023 |
I laugh.  A sibling adviced me to go and commit suicide. Said one taiye that we grew together committed suicide, and I should follow suit. I dont relate with toxic people. But will surely distance myself from crazy peoples. If you relate with toxic people, either your are killed or you kill somebody. Both ways you lose. I am happy going person. I be almajiri that pick euros from the street. I hate people lament 24/7. Lament little, but use your time judiciously. Money dey abroad if you are wise and hardworking. I see people that get money from sheer hardwork. One pakistani 26 years old was working for 15-16 months, he saved twenty nine thousands euros after paying bills and tax. That alot of money. Dont joke with your american dream. American dream is real. 9 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: How & Why do siblings fall apart? by SeriouslySense(m): 12:04pm On May 07, 2023 |
It only works when there is already suspicion and for people that don't know that trick. This is why i keep a distance from relatives that cannot discern and are highly suspicious, they can become dangerous, if deceived to harm a family due to these things. sometimes common sense is not common. saajus: 1 Like |
| Re: How & Why do siblings fall apart? by SeriouslySense(m): 12:06pm On May 07, 2023 |
juman: 1 Like |
| Re: How & Why do siblings fall apart? by MrHighSea: 12:08pm On May 07, 2023 |
It's more work to hate than to love, but this love shouldn't be at the expense of peace with one's self. If siblinghood tempers with one's inner peace, dear op, you kw na. There're stories I've seen, most recent; 1. you earn <200k, save up for a year to raise 1.5m biz capital for sibling on condition that the capital alone be returned only to realise that na scam. SCAM has torn them apart. 2. When the one that abandoned you emotionally for 2 decades, comes running/expecting for alms. 3. Entitlement mentality. Personally, I noticed that siblings grow apart if what binds them is family name and blood alone. Worse, if their wives/kids are not close. My cousin (First Son and first child to my Dad's immediate junior bro) saw me twice on a lonely road (both of us just strolling) and he unrecognised me twice. Dude is a cool headed guy. I called is attention on both occasions. I'm far older and made than him. I'm on a mission to strengthen that bridge, it'll benefit my kids and his. 5 Likes 2 Shares |
| Re: How & Why do siblings fall apart? by Isatim: 12:10pm On May 07, 2023 |
Hmmmmmm This problem exist in families. Am the living example of this querel among brothers and sisters. Presently, for like 3 years now, I don't talk to my immediate senior sister. Even at any event that we meet we just like strangers. No greetings. Well, am worried about it but no one really make up reconciliation mind for now. And our seniors are not helping matters, they seems to enjoy the situation. IT'S WELL! 4 Likes |
| Re: How & Why do siblings fall apart? by Sevenworldpower(m): 12:17pm On May 07, 2023 |
It is usually caused by parents. Preference of a child over the other Lack of discipline. Lack of value system in the family. Other factors are negative influence of extended family members, spouses of siblings, polygamous home , step parenthood and separation of siblings or parents. 6 Likes 2 Shares |
| Re: How & Why do siblings fall apart? by Rubyjade: 12:17pm On May 07, 2023 |
 sunnymighty: |
| Re: How & Why do siblings fall apart? by Rubyjade: 12:19pm On May 07, 2023 |
Merch: |
| Re: How & Why do siblings fall apart? by Jeferious: 12:19pm On May 07, 2023 |
sunnymighty:My brother, only son dey see shege scatter. Na Dem go push you to go marry early, na still Dem no go wan give you and your wife privacy. If I tell you my own story eh. Dem even leave the family business for me say make I run alone. Their reasons are that it could get them so busy and occupied that they won't find husbands on time. I just laugh in my small mind. All the same, anything that is the best interest of the family must be done. I can't think of marriage now. I'd let them marry first, firstly to use my prime well and secondly to avoid unnecessary jealousy and breach of privacy. Talk plenty jare. Just be firm and fair at the same time. And set good boundaries. 5 Likes |
| Re: How & Why do siblings fall apart? by tete7000(m): 12:20pm On May 07, 2023 |
yazga:These are competitions that started rearing heads while the kids were small but were never addressed but allowed to fester. Children growing up need to be thoroughly taught about the need to love their siblings and not hold them as competitors. Many problems in adulthood are as a result of poor upbringing. 5 Likes |
| Re: How & Why do siblings fall apart? by gimakon2(m): 12:20pm On May 07, 2023 |
When you have a younger Sister like mine, I am pretty sure you won't ask this type of question. Someone who shows she is envious of good things and wishes no good come to people. Even went as far as calling meetings because she heard I wanted to go for my travel history, and the same human being is processing admission to go to the UK. Extent ,she keeps her money (her job stopped, they paid her off) She keeps her money to sponsor UK parole and still go lengths to castigate people who got similar plans of life betterment, in the name of, they do not want to bring out money, for the family , this and that, you bring , she still calls me names and all... personally, I have put an end to talking to her for good. Make she just day. The person she go marry na e I pity for really.I wanted to date her friend, she had already started to like me, This lady went very extra length to scatter the relationship between us both, went very far as telling the girl stories that were not true in anyway. The relationship shattered , everyone moved on, even when the girls father died, it was a feat for me to extend condolences, but whatever , I am a man, it did not have to be so, i extended my condolences and moved on, and we thank God for all in the very end. So many other things, OK let me talk about the one of last year, I lost my job. I got bored with accepting anything that looked like a job offer and decided to focus on having my personal startup, instead of being engaged and loosing out after sometime. I was able to finance things for the family and what not. Even this same girl was working, the only thing she does is to come and cause problems in the house, then she comes to the house and pack everything i bought as food stuff with my money, and takes to her own house. Just a minor shaking, she as usual, went to feed my father with abrupt nonsense. If my father sees me, I started to look like irk to him. At some point , i used to go to Cotonou like weekly in order to avoid provocation. She did not stop there, She even made my elder sister fight me and threw something at my face that made me bleed from my nose. And what did she do, she pretended to be the Angel as the very usual. When she heard I started working, she called on the phone and started to behave like she was the best person. I just laughed loudly. And stomach certain things for the major interest of peace. Before i got the job, i was seeking finances to put my startup in order, after I lost friends , helpers and what not. Just few friends were there for me. I resorted to using Loan sharks to put that my business in order, so i would not be able to pay in say a day or 2 after the due date, when they call, She would tell my parents to leave me to suffer alone, that when I had money i never cared for them at all. I remember i paid Light bills, bought fuel and all treated the family members well when I had money before i lost the Job, what was my offence? That i do not give her money personally at hand, so therefore they should leave me to suffer and bear the brunt alone - but this is someone that comes to the house to pack everything and move to her house, My father saw this and he said it is normal, i looked at him and never said a word. Or is it the one a friend in Canada volunteered to help me offset the bills, she called the boy in Canada never to help me. That i spend money and go to Ghana and other countries for travel history, that no one should help me, they should allow me bear it alone. I thank God later on, my friend in Ancona in Italy send me over 3000 Euros and i was able to offset everything once and for all, and happiness came back. The boy in Question said if he sees her, they would have serious problems. I been the one calming him down. The one in Canada ended up marrying someone else because of her bad character. Lately, I worked for a Switzerland company and i was able to get finances, from the money mules, i been able to cost out few cash for house rentals , and i am still working squarely to get cash and give my father for the remainder Also from there i was able to establish my startups for good, we working closely on the funding. She lost her job, and she just been at home here. When money comes, i give her and she also eats. I buy fuel for the generator and do things for the family as usual. She does not even feel free and she barely talks to me. I just let her be for the time being and focus on what I think is quite necessary and I let myself be happy no matter what. I was helping her work out admission in the UK where i was her reference, i completed the reference form and submitted it, she said because I did not upload a letter, she started to haul abuses at me again. So the letter i typed for her is what? She started to call me names like i am useless and co, I just held myself because i am expecting something from GOD so, I would not want to say anything. I went to church and knelt down to thank GOD for all. The visitor who came to the house be like "Is this what you see?" I just laughed! This happened few days ago! Its quite Long and everyone be asking me to forgive, personally i have forgiven her, but she is very free to go, but i told myself one thing, if it would take the last drop of blood from me to make sure i give my children the best life without any of my siblings, and having anything with my kids to do with any of them, I am ready to do everything. As for her, she can go. We thank God for all. Right now she says , she regrets coming back to the house. Everyone are gradually seeing her for what she is... I'm just laughing.With siblings like these, We do not need enemies. I have accepted everything, and right now, I will work hard with all It will take to go very far away from them, and I am very glad, its gradually working out. I just have to be more prayerful. The thing i deciphered from everything is envy.I have the best job, from the job I got my own company, I travel anywhere, even if I get shakedowns , few days i am back on my feet. This is the main reason, Siblings have problems. For me, I have forgiven her, but I will never have anything to do with her again. She and the rest can go. 13 Likes |
| Re: How & Why do siblings fall apart? by OGHENAOGIE(m): 12:22pm On May 07, 2023 |
Abujahouseman:that's not true so cos u love someone if they cross their limits no apology?? 2 Likes |
| Re: How & Why do siblings fall apart? by Bostin(m): 12:23pm On May 07, 2023 |
Simple answer is if they were not raise with genuine love but survival and their parents also didn't demonstrate that love life for their children to emulate . 4 Likes |
| Re: How & Why do siblings fall apart? by Rubyjade: 12:23pm On May 07, 2023 |
saajus:This has recked havoc in my cousins family. Those fake prophet just come up with stupid prophecies and the dumb members take it hook line and sinker. Let me share, they told tehme not to take any drugs for any ailments that if they take it, it would affect their family and siblings. He had an ailment that can be treated but because of the useless prophecies they lost two family members. 2 Likes |
| Re: How & Why do siblings fall apart? by Slurity(m): 12:26pm On May 07, 2023 |
1forall:You are led by the holy spirit to know these things. This is just it. 1 Like |
| Re: How & Why do siblings fall apart? by holuwatimzy(m): 12:28pm On May 07, 2023 |
I don't even know the problem. And I think most fight comes when they all have spouses and have their own family. Sometimes I wonder what Prince William and Prince Harry's problems are. Why would they be fighting with so much wealth, but their problem came with their wives. The same thing with Psquare. And most of the time, the wives are a big problem too. Even if siblings are fighting, I feel the wife can play a mending role between them, but never, those daughters of Eve are always in competition with each other. 5 Likes |
| Re: How & Why do siblings fall apart? by Galadimabawa: 12:28pm On May 07, 2023 |
I don't know your age now, but I think small Pickin dey worry you. 1 Like 1 Share |
| Re: How & Why do siblings fall apart? by ogene144(m): 12:30pm On May 07, 2023 |
Praisepriest:I am from polygamous family I am the only one that attended higher institution for that reason my siblings didn't like me I went through hell wen I live with my immediate sister In Abule Egba they hate my daughter they even scatter my marriage now I don't call anyone of them polygamous family are not good let's abstain from it... 2 Likes |
| Re: How & Why do siblings fall apart? by marvrick: 12:36pm On May 07, 2023 |
Siblings are still humans regardless of their having same parents. The closeness they had when they were young doesn't remain so as they grow older. Normal reasons that cause quarrels between unrelated people also make siblings fall apart. It's normal really. 3 Likes |
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