See at this point I don't understand most Nigerians anymore. Every time I offer a helping hand to Nigerians they turn to your enemy. I don't understand the dynamics behind it. The whole interaction just gets very awkward after that . It's like they hate you for " humbling " them. It never fails.

But the ones who have a pure friendly relationship with you? Are the ones you haven't given anything yet. So in my everyday life person to person I try to do charity because charity covers a multitude of sins and givers never lack.

So this is a recent case study. This young guy , a security guard was sent by the company to guard the house I stay. I would say about 19 years old. One night I went grocery shopping and I was going through the gate he runs over from across the street and told me he was hungry. So I said what does he eat ? He said he likes indomie . So I went to my place and brought out like 5 indomie and 3 soft drinks and 2 sardines and gave it to him. He thanked me.

Every 2 days when I go out I would do small grocery shopping for him. Indomie and biscuits and soft drinks sardine or bread. A few times when I go out to get bottled palmwine for myself I would get him palmwine or orijin beer he likes. But I started noticing his entitlement behaviour like on the days when I don't buy him anything he would time when I Am coming home and sit beside my door when he sees me carrying my own groceries and he would be looking at me like he is depressed. And he would Always be watching me to see if I am going grocery shopping and he would hang around the car to see if I would come out with grocery.

Let's just say this guy got ridiculously stalkerish and so I called him up 4 days ago and asked him has his salary being paid yet? He said yes. Because am thinking all these things he is doing because he is new on the job and has no money and is hungry so I put up with it for like a month.

But once he told me yes that he had being paid, I in a roundabout way told him I don't tolerate the stalking. That he doesn't need to be following me or waiting on me. Anyway since that day this guy just turned into an enemy. Someone who I have been buying groceries for for almost a whole month just turned hostile like that. Now all that time I was buying him grocery he would do ass kissing stuff like when I drop my black trash bag outside my door he would take it to the bin outside for me but since that day the guy just bone my trash bags lol.

Anyway the point here is this ? You create an enemy unknowingly out of those you help - not family members- because I think it is humiliating for them and they despise you for it, so if you are going to offer charity don't offer it to people you have to see on a daily basis. Just find a beggar in the street that you would never see again. Nigerians are funny, they beg you for money but they hate you for giving them that money especially if it is not a life changing amount.

It's like a guy I gave 5000 naira one time and he thought it was an insult, just a regular guy who I don't even know like that, God is my witness, which 5000 is no money but it was just for him to buy beer for the weekend, you can get 15 beers with 5000 when I gave it to him.

So out here on these streets you have to be savage. No more mr nice guy ooo lol. basically if you are not offering guys over 100k just forget it cuz they would hate you. look for a real beggar who would appreciate 5000 or 1000.

You re his WORK-Chop!

I just snubbed one fat glutinous lady creature that's good at leeching on me and dragging my kids biscuits with them.

Boy I felt RELIEVED ,I knew she would start carrying face and bearing grudges from tomorrow,but I m still gonna share my foods with her,but as for monetary favours....I yaff struck it off kpatakpata for laive.

ahnie:
You re his WORK-Chop!

yeah lmao . Well no more. So many people would scheme to make you their work chop. Especially security guards. I saw the snake this morning unsolicitedly washing the BMW of the Neighbor. He has transferred to another person. I trust that other guy he is not civilised like me. You can wash his car 7 days a week and he will not drop shishi. Rich people are very stingy

ahnie:
I just snubbed one fat glutinous lady creature that's good at leeching on me and dragging my kids biscuits with them.

Boy I felt RELIEVED ,I knew she would start carrying face and bearing grudges from tomorrow,but I m still gonna share my foods with her,but as for monetary favours....I yaff struck it off kpatakpata for laive.

sukkot:
yeah lmao . Well no more. So many people would scheme to make you their work chop. Especially security guards. I saw the snake this morning unsolicitedly washing the BMW of the Neighbor. He has transferred to another person. I trust that other guy he is not civilised like me. You can wash his car 7 days a week and he will not drop shishi. Rich people are very stingy

Brother Bernard

ahnie:


Brother Bernard

lmao

Better that you know now to mind your kindness before someone will harm you for being kind. By the way, havent you heard of the mantra " dont start what you cant finish"? Bettwr mind yourself.

Meanwhile, any time you feel like giving money even if na small K, send am to me. I no dey alienate benefactors

sisisioge:
Better that you know now to mind your kindness before someone will harm you for being kind. By the way, havent you heard of the mantra " dont start what you cant finish"? Bettwr mind yourself.

Meanwhile, any time you feel like giving money even if na small K, send am to me. I no dey alienate benefactors

sisisioge wee not kee somebody with laugh

Like sisioge said, best not to start what you can’t finish. Been there before, had similar experiences, now I don’t even bother in the first place anymore

ibkayee:
Like sisioge said, best not to start what you can’t finish. Been there before, had similar experiences, now I don’t even bother in the first place anymore

hehe yeah it's crazy. But you guys are on the money. Never start what you cannot finish . It's a very good motto to go by .

sukkot:
hehe yeah it's crazy. But you guys are on the money. Never start what you cannot finish . It's a very good motto to go by .

It’s a shame because not everyone is like this, people genuinely in need and not looking to fleece you miss out because of the entitled ones

ibkayee:

It’s a shame because not everyone is like this, people genuinely in need and not looking to fleece you miss out because of the entitled ones

it is what it is. It's all discretion. Just do it far away from home. As a wise man once said , no dey shit where you dey put head, excuse the vulgarity lol. Give to people you will never see again if there is the need for charity. Charity covers a multitude of sins. It's like penance lol. I strongly believe that

sukkot:
it is what it is. It's all discretion. Just do it far away from home. As a wise man once said , no dey shit where you dey put head, excuse the vulgarity lol. Give to people you will never see again if there is the need for charity. Charity covers a multitude of sins. It's like penance lol. I strongly believe that

Yeah this tends to be where I give exceptions

When he told you he was hungry the first time you should have given him the indomie and left it at that.

Sukkot, you're partly (if not majorly) to blame for the attitude.
If you had only helped the security guy when he was in need and asked, he would've been eternally grateful.
The issue is you over did it.
You kept "helping", even when he was not in need, thereby, making him entitled.

mariahAngel:
Sukkot, you're partly (if not majorly) to blame for the attitude.
If you had only helped the security guy when he was in need and asked, he would've been eternally grateful.
The issue is you over did it.
You kept "helping", even when he was not in need, thereby, making him entitled.

hey Mariah how are you ? Trust you are well. Yeah you are right. We learn our lessons as we progress in life. Life is the best teacher. Keep in mind this guy is just one very skinny looking harmless looking guy is why I went overboard with the help. He doesn't look dangerous. He just looks like a lost young guy who is trying to do the job to survive but yeah point taken. Never go too far

sukkot:
hey Mariah how are you ? Trust you are well.

Yeah you are right. We learn our lessons as we progress in life. Life is the best teacher. Keep in mind this guy is just one very skinny looking harmless looking guy is why I went overboard with the help. He doesn't look dangerous. He just looks like a lost young guy who is trying to do the job to survive but yeah point taken. Never go too far

Very well, thank you.


Another way of "helping" (if you feel the need to help) is by making someone earn the help, so that they don't start to feel too entitled.
Some people will gladly run some errands for you for extra cash (or food items)

It's your fault, be a Nigerian politician and you will be loved. You should have given him one indomie,and egg. Instead you turn to father Christmas. If someone need #5000 give him #1500. They will hail you. Na you do yourself. Be a Nigerian giver.

I rather burn my money than help any human being again.

Help? That syllable ain't in my Dico 😩

I used to be the nicest guy alive until I got betrayed & backstabbed by one of my closest disciples whom I helped so much in life.

Human beings don't deserve help, everyone should struggle for him/herself.

Life is a jungle and only the strong survive ❗

Jeez, Sukkot, do you forbid paragraphs?

sukkot:
hey Mariah how are you ? Trust you are well. Yeah you are right. We learn our lessons as we progress in life. Life is the best teacher. Keep in mind this guy is just one very skinny looking harmless looking guy is why I went overboard with the help. He doesn't look dangerous. He just looks like a lost young guy who is trying to do the job to survive but yeah point taken. Never go too far

As long as you are being paid a salary, I can only do this as a one off. You overdid it and the entitled little jerk acted typically

Praisepriest:
It's your fault, be a Nigerian politician and you will be loved. You should have given him one indomie,and egg. Instead you turn to father Christmas. If someone need #5000 give him #1500. They will hail you. Na you do yourself. Be a Nigerian giver.

As in ehn. Seriously

sukkot:
See at this point I don't understand most Nigerians anymore. Every time I offer a helping hand to Nigerians they turn to your enemy. I don't understand the dynamics behind it. The whole interaction just gets very awkward after that . It's like they hate you for " humbling " them. It never fails. But the ones who have a pure friendly relationship with you ? Are the ones you haven't given anything yet. So in my everyday life person to person I try to do charity because charity covers a multitude of sins and givers never lack. So this is a recent case study. This young guy , a security guard was sent by the company to guard the house I stay. I would say about 19 years old. One night I went grocery shopping and I was going through the gate he runs over from across the street and told me he was hungry. So I said what does he eat ? He said he likes indomie . So I went to my place and brought out like 5 indomie and 3 soft drinks and 2 sardines and gave it to him. He thAnked me. Every 2 days when I go out I would do small grocery shopping for him. Indomie and biscuits and soft drinks sardine or bread. A few times when I go out to get bottled palmwine for myself I would get him palmwine or orijin beer he likes. But I started noticing his entitlement behaviour like on the days when I don't buy him anything he would time when I Am coming home and sit beside my door when he sees me carrying my own groceries and he would be looking at me like he is depressed. And he would AlwYs be watching me to see if I am going grocery shopping and he would hang around the car to see if I would come out with grocery. Let's just say this guy got ridiculously stalkerish and so I called him up 4 days ago and asked him has his salary being paid yet ? He said yes. Because am thinking all these things he is doing because he is new on the job and has no money and is hungry so I put up with it for like a month . But once he told me yes that he had being paid, I in a roundabout way told him I don't tolerate the stalking. That he doesn't need to be following me or waiting on me. Anyway since that day this guy just turned into an enemy. Someone who I have been buying groceries for for almost a whole month just turned hostile like that . Now all that time I was buying him grocery he would do ass kissing stuff like when I drop my black trash bag outside my door he would take it to the bin outside for me but since that day the guy just bone my trash bags lol. Anyway the point here is this ? You create an enemy unknowingly out of those you help - not family members- because I think it is humiliating for them and they despise you for it, so if you are going to offer charity don't offer it to people you have to see on a daily basis. Just find a beggar in the street that you would never see again. Nigerians are funny, they beg you for money but they hate you for giving them that money especially if it is not a life changing amount. It's like a guy I gave 5000 naira one time and he thought it was an insult , just a regular guy who i dont even know like that,God is my witness, which 5000 is no money but it was just for him to buy beer for the weekend, you can get 15 beers with 5000 when I gave it to him. So out here on these streets you have to be savage. No more mr nice guy ooo lol. basically if you are not offering guys over 100k just forget it cuz they would hate you. look for a real beggar who would appreciate 5000 or 1000

You are gradually becoming a Nigerian. Generosity to the poor is typically abused by them and taken as entitlement.

A lesson we

With an ingrate like him, if you are to recount all the food you've bought for him or given him, he will ask you what have you given him or what have you done for him? That's why you've to be careful who you're kind to, especially with the entitlement mentality of many Nigerians and their stubbornness when it comes to appreciating what people do for them. Secondly, unless the person utterly deserves it, showering someone undeserving with kindness after kindness isn't a good idea, because they won't value it, will take you for granted, will come to expect it all the time, and will act like you're the bad guy when you're no longer doing those things for them.

GloriousGbola:


You are gradually becoming a Nigerian. Generosity to the poor is typically abused by them and taken as entitlement.

A lesson we

yeah bro it's a lesson well learned. Everybody is on red so you can't be losing guard out here. Gotta be alert and assertive

Octopusssy:

As long as you are being paid a salary, I can only do this as a one off. You overdid it and the entitled little jerk acted typically

hehe entitled little jerk. They are everywhere .

Octopusssy:
Jeez, Sukkot, do you forbid paragraphs?

lmao when typing from a phone I cannot be bothered rara .

mariahAngel:


Very well, thank you.


Another way of "helping" (if you feel the need to help) is by making someone earn the help, so that they don't start to feel too entitled.
Some people will gladly run some errands for you for extra cash (or food items)

yeah I don't like strangers doing errands for me. That's like an invisible contract you have created with that person. And they would feel entitled to come around to see if you have work for them anytime they need money. I rather give it to you then you disappear . I don't use peoples services at all. I don't like creating that kind of bond . I am notorious for doing everything myself

sukkot:
yeah I don't like strangers doing errands for me. That's like an invisible contract you have created with that person. And they would feel entitled to come around to see if you have work for them anytime they need money. I rather give it to you then you disappear . I don't use peoples services at all. I don't like creating that kind of bond . I am notorious for doing everything myself

You cannot do everything by yourself, otherwise, you'd eventually wear yourself out.
In life, help is necessary for balance.

Nowadays, people delegate tasks/duties to make their lives easier, and at the same time, help others that are in need earn little cash.

Loool welcome to Naija.

sukkot:
lmao when typing from a phone I cannot be bothered rara .

Well, it is painful to the eyes