The original author of this piece is being shortsighted and parochial.

When there are individual problems that warrant a divorce, by all means go for it if it will help you.

But to make a general call for an increase in divorce rates to go up is confirmation that people either don't learn the lesson for history or are not able to see logical connections.

I'm too tired to help the person beyond saying she should go and research the effect of increqsijg divorce rates on communities and subsequent generations. Black America is a good example of this experiment.

I'm going to bed. I no get energy today.What rubbish.

nlfpmod:
As shared by Vashti Vash Offo:



https://twitter.com/Vash_Offo/status/1660702453648465927?t=iG_-zSFySZJMgg1RI7BOoA&s=08

Jennyclay:
MONEY
SEX
LOVE
ATTENTION.

If a man can’t give me enough of these 4 things I listed above in my marriage, I’ll gladly divorce him.

BTW, the lady should be happy that the ERROR called marriage has ended. A better man who would appreciate and respect her career must surely locate her.

When you use the word better man!

Are you better yourself?

You are a small girl, you're not matured for marriage!

Jennyclay:
MONEY
SEX
LOVE
ATTENTION.

If a man can’t give me enough of these 4 things I listed above in my marriage, I’ll gladly divorce him.

BTW, the lady should be happy that the ERROR called marriage has ended. A better man who would appreciate and respect her career must surely locate her.

Can you please tell us what you will give to the man?

pocohantas:


For a gender that claims not go benefit from marriage, you guys are too invested in the marital status of women. Can you focus on important things like Chinese men? Invent something and elect good leaders.

https://www.nairaland.com/7699219/tolani-ekiti-boy-generates-electricity/5



Since you've written women off, how about you gurlz invent new foods to feed men so we can do what we do best maybe our fore fathers were right afterall a woman place is in the kitchen

The woman did not accept the advances of the nice guys but chose prob looks and material things. She had it coming alright

Kobojunkie:
What valid reason would there be for a man to subjugate his partner and wife in marriage? The marriage na only him own?

This post is dead.

Kobojunkie:
Let's please leave the bible which instead states submission was, in fact, a curse on marriage out of this brain damage abeg! Don't wake them up abeg!

Someone tried to argue with me that it wasn’t a curse. lol

As in eh

pocohantas:


For a gender that claims not to benefit from marriage, you guys are too invested in the marital status of women. Can you focus on important things like Chinese men? Invent something and elect good leaders.

bukatyne:


Pele, I can imagine the feeling.

After supporting the couple to ensure the wedding is successful, you realised they are unserious elements.

With the way we like marriage, you would think we would learn how to make it enjoyable.

It is well.

As in ehnn....traveled from Lagos all the way to Bonny Island, Rivers state, all for nothing.

And this dude thinks it's funny. I don't even like seeing the pictures in my gallery😂

cococandy:
Someone tried to argue with me that it wasn’t a curse. lol

Christianity in Nigeria na another class of blindness!

bukatyne:


Let's take the men's behaviors at face value:
What would make husband 1 an enemy of progress with the intent to ruin her career? He saw teachers who would be home every night, he did not marry; instead he went for a doctor.

What would make husband 2 a septic tank always giving his wife STDs like he is their chief distributor in Nigeria?

I would like to hear your justifications for their actions.

[color=#006600][quote author=bukatyne post=123334518]

She was the life of the party in med school.

I'm not justifying the man's ill treatment but that might be one reason. Some persons that know boundary!

When a woman sees shege, she is encouraged to wear red pant and pray. This has never been a proven way to let out steam, so they become toxic and depressed with receding hairlines. Waiting for their kids to grow, then they go there to disturb the future daughter inlaw and the son who has failed to ask his mother why she is running from her own husband, would indulge her. Or maybe he knows why she is running. After all he saw it happen.



I am not moved by all the divorce topics in the UK or wherever. The problem is not the UK. The problem is the foundation of Nigerian marriages. We are a dangerous people. Home and abroad we are the same. Any country we enter en masse must start looking for how to close her borders. That is how dangerous we are. But we would hardly ever reflect and change. Instead we blame feminism

Pocohantas girl you hardly miss. Lol

In Nigeria, there's only the tiniest little chance of finding a suitable life partner that you can make a genuinely loving life with and live happily thereafter.

That's because, every facet of life here, ie. personal, professional, business and any other relationship you come into is almost always characterised by patent or latent mistrust, distrust, deceit, greed, lack of respect and decency, intolerance, bad faith, ruthless selfishness and so on.

Any expectation that a society which operates almost entirely on these flawed foundations can produce in large numbers individuals, whether male or female, of a character necessary for fostering mutually respectful, trusting, happy, and enduring marriages is misplaced.

You can't sow thorns and expect to reap oranges.

It all went wrong at the family unit. Nigerian boys and girls are not being brought up with the right values. By the time the average Nigerian chiild is in his/her mid teens, he or she's already disrespectful, deceptive, greedy, untrustworthy etc

Based on my personal observation of married friends and people around me, the vast majority of marriages are zombie marriages. The marriages are on auto pilot, years are going by, but absence of love, cheating, lack of mutual respect, intolerance, rudeness, coldness etc characterise most of the marriages.

So every marriage in Nigeria is like the nonsense you posted? She made a choice of marrying a controlling and insecure man. She made her decision to leave. Don’t come here to act like this is the norm.

Lol, may we not marry nonsense in lilith's name, amen🙏🏽

pocohantas:


For a gender that claims not to benefit from marriage, you guys are too invested in the marital status of women. Can you focus on important things like Chinese men? Invent something and elect good leaders.

Omo when we’re all dead and gone and future generations dust off the history archives the legacy of our men will be marriage topics in the nairaland family section whilst others are building empires o ma se oo

Kobojunkie:
Indeed! You only need how some women raise their sons differently from their daughters, and then they turn around and wonder why their own daughters end up with equally sad examples for husbands.

This!!!

iammo:
Divorce is never the solution, marriage is not meant to be perfect

The solution to what? a peaceful mentally healthy life where you are free to live out your God given talent without someone feeling the need to control you? Or the solution to maintaining the perception of a union where the two are not anywhere close to being one?


Marriage is not meant to be perfect? Is that supposed to be an excuse for destructive behaviors that only harm And do not help anyone?

What are your standards for a good marriage? Like seriously.

Some of us accept mediocrity in marriage because we don't have any really purposeful or transcendent meaning behind it. We are just fulfilling societal expectations or getting moved by flimsy emotions. That is where the problems begin.

NaijaCowFarm:
Problem is that the men do not want to get married, but women keep pushing them into it. They initiate marriages and later cry wolf.

How are women pushing men into marriage? By putting a gun to their head that they must marry them?

Kinehap:
Rubbish

If you can't work your marriage out you want others to divorce and be like you. Tommorow you will still look for a man to satisfy you.

If you are divorcing, avoid anything men.

This reasoning doesn't make sense, why should women avoid anything men because they are divorced? You sound bitter and pained because divorced women still get attention from men.

pocohantas:


Yes na. Annie Idibia. I didn't o. I no wan vex.
I only wish two of them the best because strangely I love seeing them together.



I am sure that man hooked her as a young naive girl. Now I see why your church cares about age difference. Make them understand who is manipulating who.🤣🤣🤣

That lady no be saint. Rumors has it she was knacking one big man married to a young actress. If you know you know.

Jennyclay:
MONEY
SEX
LOVE
ATTENTION.

If a man can’t give me enough of these 4 things I listed above in my marriage, I’ll gladly divorce him.

BTW, the lady should be happy that the ERROR called marriage has ended. A better man who would appreciate and respect her career must surely locate her.

Be submissive to your husband and you will get more than enough of these you just mentioned except you married the devil's son.

You are not ready to put SUBMISSION on the table as a wife ,just fasten your seat belt, marriage is going to be a bumpy ride.

Jennyclay:
MONEY
SEX
LOVE
ATTENTION.

If a man can’t give me enough of these 4 things I listed above in my marriage, I’ll gladly divorce him.

BTW, the lady should be happy that the ERROR called marriage has ended. A better man who would appreciate and respect her career must surely locate her.

@ d bolded. You are right but You mustn't get married my dear, and you mustn't be in a relationship neither. For ur peace of mind and to avoid any error , please just stay single forever and stay away from any relationship with a Man. You can do ladies instead. Thank you

Admin! You can come on this thread and post all kinds of negative stuff just to justify the fact that your friends are suffering in marriage and divorce is the only answer...


Mere observing your comments I could smartly access your intelligence and notice you are a Gen Z who don't know a thing about life, who is covered by the influence and effect of failed marriages, ills of divorces and propagated contents dehumanizing the male folk!

I wonder if you were close to your father or had his love because you lack every understanding about men, may be your boyfriends are not seeing you as a value more likely as a liability and something to use...


Young one, I don't blame you, you are a victim of this feminist disease!

Everyone needs a partner,everyone needs to understand each other whether in a relationship or marriage .


You are gladly Pained that the divorce rates in Nigeria are so small compared to how you visualize and wanted it..

If I may ask? Are you a daughter from a dysfunctional family? Where your parents divorced or seperated? How was the effect on every one generally?...


Somewhere in your small mind you think divorce is the solution and one angel will drop from heaven in form of a man to safe you bitter souls!!!!


I laugh in my local Annang language..

I am 2½ years in marriage with a daughter and am still understanding my wife, I have been doing alot of working on her to remove this shackles of mentality you ladies have towards men...

So far am 50% successful, and am not satisfied myself, the two of us are working out our marriage everyday. So if you think marriage is perfect my dear you are a joker...


Marriage needs understanding, needs working, marriage needs everything.

Simple solution is to cancel western marriage ideas and return back to traditional marriage. Molestation, cheating, abuse and deceit was not this prominent during the time of our fathers who practiced this traditional system. These days, everyone is just living a fake life in marriage. Sad.

Even if she sees shege truth is a high percentage of Nigerian married women are unemployed/ underemployed. Most see marriage as a free pass to financial freedom, most can't stand on their own hence in spite of the emotional trauma, cheating, beating, reckless lifestyle of the spouse they'll always endure No comot till de kee u😂
When she's independent, some guys are totally jealous 🤣 One good thing is that we're not like whites if not nothing like marriage (hakimi) that's why even a whole Ronaldo is not married (wisdom).
It's not a do or die affair to get married, marry someone you truly love let it be mutual, COMMUNICATION is very important, understand each others needs n work things out without comparing with other people's own most importantly do not go for someone u don't genuinely love just because you feel he's materially ready. Las las true love exists if you haven't felt it let no one deceive you

I even taught that the man was beating her that's why she left.Some of this women need to grow up.Marriage is not easy issues like this could be resolved by marriage conseling.

bukatyne:




When they say for better for worse, they refer to challenges that life throws at the couple; childlessness, job loss, health challenges, issues from in-laws, special needs children etc.

They are not talking about one of the parties roving mad and becoming a witch/wizard to the other party.

It is this 'marriage is not meant to be perfect ' that enables you men especially to waltz in with stupid behaviours and lack of home training hoping to be tolerated and accepted.

While marriage a might not be perfect because life is not perfect and the challenges I mentioned above, marriage ought to be enjoyed by both parties.

So ask yourself: these behaviours I put up, would it make my spouse enjoy this marriage?

Life is already throwing challenges, why should someone meant to make our lives more beautiful contribute or sponsor the major challenge?

Ogbeni divorce and free that man from your wide pakus. He must be tired by now. Let him taste something fresh

NaijaCowFarm:
Problem is that the men do not want to get married, but women keep pushing them into it. They initiate marriages and later cry wolf.

How can a woman push a man into marraige, aren't you supposed to be a man? Yeye.

Nigerian women do worse. They indiscriminately cheat on their men, deceive their men to raise bastards and monetize their affection without wanting to be called prostitutes. Isn’t it better you just divorce the man?!
99% of Nigerian women have no honor. They are mostly lazy, hungry, greedy, manipulative love peddlers masquerading as legit partners. They dare not divorce their men, because they benefit more from the marriage.

nlfpmod:
As shared by Vashti Vash Offo:



https://twitter.com/Vash_Offo/status/1660702453648465927?t=iG_-zSFySZJMgg1RI7BOoA&s=08

The foundation a marriage is laid will determine its success. Red flags are hard to hide during courtship.
There are couples celebrating 40yrs of joyful marriage and others few years and then divorce.... Choose how you want yours and prepare for it.

chidiokay:




https://www.nairaland.com/7699219/tolani-ekiti-boy-generates-electricity/5



Since you've written women off, how about you gurlz invent new foods to feed men so we can do what we do best maybe our fore fathers were right afterall a woman place is in the kitchen

Is that all?

Bless your heart.