Good evening guys, please I need your advise.

I have been married for over a year to this babe now and we do everything together, literally everything together, we operate joint finance at least for now.

I'm currently schooling outside Nigeria, and she's been very supportive so far most especially financially.

So, my elder brother is trying to process his relocation as well, and due to policy change and everything, cost of processing has gone up. He needed to apply for visa and they need about 790 pounds, he has enough money but there was a mistake in the application and he cancelled after payment and there will be a refund after 28days.

I have access to 1k credit card but there is a possibility of it being declined but I was so sure.

I felt I could assist since we don't really spend money on the card or if at all we do, it's not much.

Fine, we too, we are really looking for money to complete school fees and some other important project ahead of us.

So, I called my wife from work to explain the situation of things to her and seek her consent on the card and she said it might not go.

So I later tried the card that night and it was eventually declined. I told her the card was declined. I called the CS next day and I was able to make the payment, she was sitting next to me when I made the payment.

I thought that was it. 3 days later she said we needed to pay some bills, which would mean we encroach into the credit card, and I told her I've spent the money on the credit card for the application.

It was at this point the battle started.
She's been giving me silent treatment since then and I am wondering what's going on.

I have been begging to know what's up. And when she spoke out of anger, she was like she's not aware I used the card. She said the card would not go through. Personally I felt since the application was done in her presence she's aware, maybe I assumed.

She's promised not to forgive me anytime soon that I take her for a fool.

Guys, to the smallest 1pound transaction, she's always in the loop.

I have never seen her angry. I sincerely don't know where I went wrong but I need to pacify her cos there's a lot at stake now and she doesn't care if everything crumbles.

Marriage experts, please come to my aid. All I need in my home is peace without any grudges.

I had no intention of hurting her.

.

You need to communicate with her. Devote a weekend towards sitting down to ask her what the issues are. Don't allow her push you over. Be concerned about her feelings but firm.

Also, does your wife outearn you? be ause you mentioned using her credit card. If she does, then the issues might go deeper than your present argument. I'll recommend you watch two videos that made frontpage last week. It addresses these your concerns exactly.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eUrng-mfZpQ

Watch how the women talk in the videos about money for insights into your wife. The key phrase here is "watch how they talk about money and their relationships"

After that, then watch this


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eR3MCsqxBvA

You can thank me later.

And let me know how it goes with wifey. Cheers

But you wronged her. You assumed too much. Imagine the positions are swapped and she acts before telling you that since she acted in your presence she assumed you were aware. Check how you would have reacted and decide if she is overreacting or just doing what anyone in her shoes would have done. After that, you know the next thing to do. Good luck and wishing you a happy and prosperous home.

Beg her like 5 occasions
Try hustle to meet up the bills she said then lock up too.

waiting for the Elders to comment the issue no to clear for my understanding

I hope your brother isn't planning to come and live with you?

She go show him and you shege....

Dimaya:
You need to communicate with her. Devote a weekend towards sitting down to ask her what the issues are. Don't allow her push you over. Be concerned about her feelings but firm.

Also, does your wife outearn you? be ause you mentioned using her credit card. If she does, then the issues might go deeper than your present argument. I'll recommend you watch two videos that made frontpage last week. It addresses these your concerns exactly.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eUrng-mfZpQ

Watch how the women talk in the videos about money for insights into your wife. The key phrase here is "watch how they talk about money and their relationships"

After that, then watch this


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eR3MCsqxBvA

You can thank me later.

And let me know how it goes with wifey. Cheers

She doesnt, although I'm only allowed to work 20hrs as a student and she can work for as much as she likes. Even at that, I still hustle so to reduce the burden on her.

Foodqueen:
I hope your brother isn't planning to come and live with you?

She go show him and you shege....

No

Bluntguy:
But you wronged her. You assumed too much. Imagine the positions are swapped and she acts before telling you that since she acted in your presence she assumed you were aware. Check how you would have reacted and decide if she is overreacting or just doing what anyone in her shoes would have done. After that, you know the next thing to do. Good luck and wishing you a happy and prosperous home.

How do I restore tranquility? I can't undo the past

Women are unnecessarily been petty...!! Na small thing dey vex that gender!!

Matrix414:


She doesnt, although I'm only allowed to work 20hrs as a student and she can work for as much as she likes. Even at that, I still hustle so to reduce the burden on her.

That means she's the one bringing home the bacon...and you used the bulk of the money to go settle an issue related to your own family.

That's a recipè for disaster

Kobicove:


That means she's the one bringing home the bacon...and you used the bulk of the money to go settle an issue related to your own family.

That's a recipè for disaster

I just felt it's a credit card that we rarely use and the refund as a date, it's not like I dash them.
And since I told her I would be using the card.


All these doesn't matter.... I want to restore peace

Even adeboye and Oyedepo don't do joint account, e get why? She will cool down when she run out of steam

Matrix414:


I just felt it's a credit card that we rarely use and the refund as a date, it's not like I dash them.
And since I told her I would be using the card.


All these doesn't matter.... I want to restore peace

Appease her like a god.. pour palm oil on her head.. maybe kill a dog at her feet...

Better beg her. She is the one feeding you in the UK as she's the one working.

Small thing now, she fit call Police throw you comot house.

At some points , you’ll need to simp to make peace. She’s your wife, you should know her weak point, capitalise on that.. Goodluck

Thank you all

Matrix414:
Good evening guys, please I need your advise.



I had no intention of hurting her.

Have your own separate account for which you can spend on what you want without questions, she too should have hers too, and Each party should contribute an agreed amount each to the joint account from which all the joint expenses will be made.

Matrix414:


I just felt it's a credit card that we rarely use and the refund as a date, it's not like I dash them.
And since I told her I would be using the card.


All these doesn't matter.... I want to restore peace

From the looks of it the only way you can restore peace immediately is by returning the complete funds to the account at the very earliest time

Preek and toto matter no dey finish for nairaland

Divorce her

So when are you paying it back? One sign of a worthless person is they don't pay loans.