I have a well-known acc by the way but needed to post with this with a new one due to the dark nature of my story. Don't want anyone judging me unnecessarily.

Everything I'm putting below is real and actually happened to me, regardless of how difficult it is to believe.


Will be a tad lengthy, but please bear with me.




My fiancé who's in her early 20s and I are settling down soon


Recently, I discovered that she slept with not one, but two persons in the first two months of our relationship which we've been in for a year.

She swears that she didn't know what came over her at the time. Until this discovery, there were more than enough indicators that she has been loyal to me. She doesn't do anything shady and has been a very supportive woman. I would naturally have trust issues with a girl with her beauty and killer body, but she's just trustworthy.


Now, she wants to swear in the traditional way that it was only those two and that it happened in the early days our relationship just so I can believe her. She also wants to take a oath for me to be assured that she's mine. I didn't bring any of this up; she did.


I told her I would think about it but lied to her that in my family, a girl must be cleansed when she cheats before the relationship can continue. I just came up with this to know the lengths she's willing to go to prove herself to me. She agreed without hesitation.

The cleansing, which I made up, involves eating bitter kola and receiving 11 heavy lashes on the back while she's naked. I was surprised she still wanted to go ahead with it. At this point, I couldn't even retract my words and come plain that's it's all a lie.

Four days ago that she visited, she had already bought the items herself — a very thick cane and bitter kola. I told her to strip naked and lie on the bed. I said some useless things into the kola and gave her to chew. The force with which each stroke landed on her back, I didn't know where they came from. I watched as she screamed and bawled while I her continually beat her. The last stroke was with all my might and she screamed the entire house down.

She cried into my arms after everything and begged me to forgive her. What I did doesn't make sense by the way, and I know it. Now she's ready to swear and also take an oath, but I don't want any of that. I actually trusted her before all these issues. And I don't even believe in swearing. I've forgiven her, but I feel guilty for what I did.


What do you guys suggest I do?

Update

So I see a lot of people are finding it difficult to believe this happened. I don't have to prove anything, but I'll attach screenshots of our conversations for context. Not everyone is jobless as some people here, you know. I only seeked advice.

To those screaming "physical abuse", I was still the one that helped massage her back after the entire thing as it had several, visible bruises due to her light skin. Don't condemn someone when you haven't walked a mile in their shoes.

Clout chaser

Temporaryacc:
I have a well-known acc by the way but needed to post with this with a new one due to the dark nature of my story. Don't want anyone judging me unnecessarily




My fiancé and I are settling down soon


Recently, I discovered that she slept with not one, but two persons in the first two months of our relationship which we've been in for a year.

She swears that she didn't know what came over her at the time. Until this discovery, there were more than enough indicators that she has been loyal to me. She doesn't do anything shady and has been a very supportive woman. I would naturally have trust issues with a girl of her beauty and killer body, but she's just trustworthy.


Now, she wants to swear in the traditional way that it was only those two and that it happened in the early days our relationship just so I can believe her. She also wants to take a oath for me to be assured that she's mine. I didn't bring any of this up; she did.


I told her I would think about it but lied to her that in my family, a girl must be cleansed when she cheats before the relationship can continue. I just came up with this to know the lengths she's willing to go to prove herself to me. She agreed without hesitation.

The cleansing, which I made up, involves eating bitter kola and receiving 11 heavy lashes on the back while she's naked. I was surprised she still wanted to go ahead with it. At this point, I couldn't even retract my words and come plain that's it's all a lie.

On the day she came visiting, she had already bought the items herself — a very thick cane and bitter kola. I told her to strip naked and lie on the bed. I said some useless things into the kola and gave her to chew. The force with which each stroke landed on her back, I didn't know where they came from. I watched as she screamed and bawled while I her continually beat her. The last stroke was with all my might and she screamed the entire house down.

She cried into my arms after everything and begged me to forgive her. What I did doesn't make sense by the way, and I know it. Now she's ready to swear and also take an oath, but I don't want any of that. I actually trusted her before all these issues. And I don't even believe in swearing. I've forgiven her, but I feel guilty for what I did.


What do you guys suggest I do?

Only god knows who is more foolish between you and the girl if the nonsense you put up there is real

d flogging small na, why u no dash her blows join like how i dealt with one useless girl that ate my money

joelsky:
Clout chaser

You've read two many junk stories on this platform that you now believe everyone is jobless to be making up useless stories.


I won't dignify you with a further response, cause it'll be a total waste of time.

Puss360 come and read what is called simp' for women''
Op will u do such a thing to ur sister or mother?

OP don't stop.

Amotolongbo:
Only god knows who is more foolish between you and the girl if the nonsense you put up there is real

Can you contribute anything meaningful without insults?

If you can't, it's not a must you remain on the thread

Asaba nollywood script.

Timoleon:
Asaba nollywood script.

Believe what you want

What you did to that lady is domestic violence. She is supposed to speak to her parents so that they can encourage her to quit the relationship asap. She is blindly in love and doesn't know she can dump you and will always get a better man. She is the one who needs advice, not you.

LilMissFavvy:
What you did to that lady is domestic violence. She is supposed to speak to her parents so that they can encourage her to quit the relationship asap. She is blindly in love and doesn't know she can dump you and will always get a better man. She is the one who needs advice, not you.

I don't beat women; what I did is nonsense, and I admitted it.


What I'm seeking advice for is how we can move on with the relationship


But I don't see how she's the victim like you claimed; madam, she cheated on me the early days of our relationship

Temporaryacc:
I have a well-known acc by the way but needed to post with this with a new one due to the dark nature of my story. Don't want anyone judging me unnecessarily.

Everything I'm putting below is real and actually happened to me, regardless of how difficult it is to believe.


Will be a tad lengthy, but please bear with me.




My fiancé and I are settling down soon


Recently, I discovered that she slept with not one, but two persons in the first two months of our relationship which we've been in for a year.

She swears that she didn't know what came over her at the time. Until this discovery, there were more than enough indicators that she has been loyal to me. She doesn't do anything shady and has been a very supportive woman. I would naturally have trust issues with a girl with her beauty and killer body, but she's just trustworthy.


Now, she wants to swear in the traditional way that it was only those two and that it happened in the early days our relationship just so I can believe her. She also wants to take a oath for me to be assured that she's mine. I didn't bring any of this up; she did.


I told her I would think about it but lied to her that in my family, a girl must be cleansed when she cheats before the relationship can continue. I just came up with this to know the lengths she's willing to go to prove herself to me. She agreed without hesitation.

The cleansing, which I made up, involves eating bitter kola and receiving 11 heavy lashes on the back while she's naked. I was surprised she still wanted to go ahead with it. At this point, I couldn't even retract my words and come plain that's it's all a lie.

Four days ago that she visited, she had already bought the items herself — a very thick cane and bitter kola. I told her to strip naked and lie on the bed. I said some useless things into the kola and gave her to chew. The force with which each stroke landed on her back, I didn't know where they came from. I watched as she screamed and bawled while I her continually beat her. The last stroke was with all my might and she screamed the entire house down.

She cried into my arms after everything and begged me to forgive her. What I did doesn't make sense by the way, and I know it. Now she's ready to swear and also take an oath, but I don't want any of that. I actually trusted her before all these issues. And I don't even believe in swearing. I've forgiven her, but I feel guilty for what I did.


What do you guys suggest I do?

mumu. I wonder why she even did all ds things to try n please mumu. Dem suppose arrest you for domestic violence

I think Devilishman has something to tell you…

Westerhoffe:
I think Devilishman has something to tell you…

Scroll up.
I've told him what to do already.
I don't waste time on threads like this.

DevilishMan:


Scroll up.
I've told him what to do already.
I don't waste time on threads like this.

DevilishMan indeed…

I don't know why i found this hilarious 🤣 you just carry all the vex land her those beatings. I am sure you left cane mark on her skin. But omo, ebi things. She really loves you op for her to agree to receive those lashes. 😄

On a serious note, since you've forgiven her already just forget and don't bite yourself on the beating you gave her. Atleast she's proven herself worthy to be with you. Don't ever tell her all those cleansing stuff its all a lie o. And better pray she isn't a nairalander or come across this your post somehow. If not yawa go gas o.

talented321:
Puss360 come and read what is called simp' for women''
Op will u do such a thing to ur sister or mother?

lol

Lol..... Firstly, this is heavily scripted and reeks of excessive fiction....

But lemme continue with the flow...

If I were to be the adviser to that girl.. e don happen e don happen... I'll scold her, and tell her to leave you alone....
She cheated the first two months and so? Hasn't she apologized? You were you a virgin before meeting her? You all see why I detest talk of virginity coz it reeks of hypocrisy....
Okay now that you concocted an idea of saying women must be cleansed after cheating didn't she agree to the terms?
After she bought those items, didn't you see how far she is willing to go? You still went ahead to engage in domestic violence.... Lol...
An eye for an eye ooo ....
Na to father area boys to make sure say dem damage your spinal cord... So you'll be wheelchair bound for life.....

I rather do ashawo till I die than to forgive and date your type....
Talented321 come and carry me out of here....

Your story is obviously fake. You physically abused somebody and you're asking if you should forgive her. Is she not the one who should be questioning whether to forgive you or not? Smh

This thrad is better titled: "Should I forgive myself?"

I can't imagine what she will do to you if you eventually cheat on her. Women don't forget things. Why didn't you just forgive her then, than going through the stress of fetish act?
Putting mouth in relationship matter is usually a waste of time. But just have it in the back of your mind that most women can be very desperate when trying to achieve certain goals. You better treat her nice, that all I have to say.

You also need cleansing where you should be punished severely for your silliness. Still trying to fathom why she subjected herself to such. Does this suggest she's opened to you becoming fetish in the future?

Load of crap!! Op you dey whine yourself

Puss360:
Lol..... Firstly, this is heavily scripted and reeks of excessive fiction....

But lemme continue with the flow...

If I were to be the adviser to that girl.. e don happen e don happen... I'll scold her, and tell her to leave you alone....
She cheated the first two months and so? Hasn't she apologized? You were you a virgin before meeting her? You all see why I detest talk of virginity coz it reeks of hypocrisy....
Okay now that you concocted an idea of saying women must be cleansed after cheating didn't she agree to the terms?
After she bought those items, didn't you see how far she is willing to go? You still went ahead to engage in domestic violence.... Lol...
An eye for an eye ooo ....
Na to father area boys to make sure say dem damage your spinal cord... So you'll be wheelchair bound for life.....

I rather do ashawo till I die than to forgive and date your type....
Talented321 come and carry me out of here....

wetin dem dey cleanse? Na preeks she collect no be dirty

Dont worry, when time reach u go chop your lashes back.

The desperation to get married is what you see there.

That's if what you wrote is true.

OP hollup!

So, even if this story is true, you're asking if you should forgive her after lashing her mercilessly?

OP take time o.

I don't want to believe this happened tho. Cos this is way off.

*Based on your update, you feel cos you helped massaged the injuries you inflicted on her, it's no longer physical abuse*

Agreed, cheating in a committed relationship is wrong, but the way things played out in this situation is so gross.

If she was my sister, and she tells me this kind of thing.... Hmmmmm

Wait you use cane flog her coz she cheat . Wetin happen to sending her away and ending the relationship if you can't take it anymore . Well I blame her parents and brothers .

Thank God say my tradition we value our girls even for marriage we nor they sell our women , try this with my sista and I'll be breaking your jaw ,nose , eye and mouth .

Which kind useless cleansing are you doing?

Why beat someone's daughter in that manner?

Moreover this happened early in your relationship, when she probably hadn't seen the prospect of ending up with you.

Did you know you can still be arrested for physical abuse on that lady?

You should be the one seeking forgiveness here, not her.

A young girl in her early 20s, that she was even willing to go these lengths shows just how much she loves you. I pray you forgive yourself.

Insanity, I pity her but well they always chose the bad guys to torment them