Welcome, Guest: Register On Nairaland / LOGIN! / Trending / Recent / New
Stats: 3,206,183 members, 7,995,028 topics. Date: Wednesday, 06 November 2024 at 07:29 AM

The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days - Family (8) - Nairaland

Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days (53013 Views)

How Do I Clear This Guilt Against My Dad? / Living With The Guilt Of Abortion / Woman Wakes Her Husband Up With N500k On His Birthday (Photos) (2) (3) (4)

(1) (2) (3) ... (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10) (11) ... (39) (Reply) (Go Down)

Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by MOVIC6: 7:07pm On Aug 22, 2023
I'm male and I will say you and those that supported your write-up are very wicked and selfish, you gat no excuses for that lazy and foolish man.
There are so many things that can make a man loose focus are plenty, can't he try and find something doing, all he does is drinking and being lazy and stupid.....
Dogalmighty17:
You arrested and lucked up your husband for 2 days? No one is dumb here ma. No right thinking woman just suddenly locks up her husband. Was there food in the kitchen for him when he came home? Did you cook for yourself and just the children?

There are other crises resolution and mediation channels available to resolve issues within spouses. Did you explore any of them?

You most probably had nurtured this thought of locking your husband up for a while. You also most probably have mocked him in your actions and your words.

Madam, you don buy market o! I assure you of this, your husband will never forgive you. The day that man gets a job and finds his feet you will be the one begging for divorce.

I am not making excuses for him. Your husband is going through serious depression. No man wants to not be able to provide for his family. The present economy doesn't help at all. You could have handled the situation better.

6 Likes 2 Shares

Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by IamMobisola(f): 7:08pm On Aug 22, 2023
Domestic violence is a big NO. Anyone guilty of that should be arrested.

4 Likes 2 Shares

Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by braine(m): 7:08pm On Aug 22, 2023
Kobojunkie:
Men without money turn into animals and attack their family members. Is that what you are saying? undecided

You only heard her side of the story, which I'm sure is exaggerated to fit her narrative.

Until I hear the man's side, I will take her "beating" submission with a pinch of salt.

6 Likes

Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by UnfairLife7(m): 7:08pm On Aug 22, 2023
Procashtips:


Did you bother to ask questions before believing her?

Do you know how many men are in jail for made up lies against them by women?

Why do fellow men jump to believe women on the spot?

Una no dey learn?
because i know how violence men are to women. Domestic violence, rapist, assault, robbery, cyber fraud, pick pocket, hooligans et al. All these are men handwork

Try dey talk true no matter how bitter it is

4 Likes 2 Shares

Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by Okechinwadike: 7:09pm On Aug 22, 2023
Samantha124:
Well, what he did was unlawful and if you ask me, you did the right thing by getting him arrested.

Let it be a warning to him that next time you wouldn't be lenient on him.... You can apologize to him for getting him arrested, but let him know that you don't appreciate what he did to you and you're not going to stand for it if he continues with his behavior.

It's not your fault that he lost his job and can't find another one.
I can bet my life that you are not married, not even in any relationship and you want her to be like you. deceiver

2 Likes

Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by Nobody: 7:09pm On Aug 22, 2023
In other words, you're telling me that Nigerian men are nonsense...🤣🤣🤣
Ikorodurealtor:


You don't take nonsense?
Then marriage is not for you.... Because in marriage, you must be ready to take nonsense.

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by Jman06(m): 7:09pm On Aug 22, 2023
UnfairLife7:
The man deserves more than that. He has been without job for 2 years and all he could do was to drink, smoke, destroy his wife stuff and even went as far as hitting her.

I am a man and i will keep saying it, we men can't take half of what we dish out to women.

These same men cannot try all these nonesense in developed countries. Naija na shithole truly. Too many things wrong about the country
What has the wife done to help him get a job or start a business since she's working! If the reverse was the case, I'm sure the man would have started some business for her, why couldn't she do same for her husband?? I thought that in marriage, two becomes one.

I don't support the man for resorting to violence but he was obviously frustrated and his "better half" couldn't help him stand on his feet again.

People like you always blame men in everything while absolving women of blames and it's bad!

1 Like

Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by extol1(m): 7:09pm On Aug 22, 2023
DavidTech23:

You didn't tell us what you said to warrant the phone smashing
I bet you, she said provocative words to him. The woman is incomplete

2 Likes

Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by Kobojunkie: 7:10pm On Aug 22, 2023
braine:
â–  You only heard her side of the story, which I'm sure is exaggerated to fit her narrative. Until I hear the man's side, I will take her "beating" submission with a pinch of salt.
Again, Men without money turn into animals and attack their family members. Is that what you are saying? undecided

3 Likes 2 Shares

Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by Styluss: 7:10pm On Aug 22, 2023
No man can forget such treatment. he might move on for the sake of his kid but will nevr forget it
dreamxhaser:


You think it's easy

The man was going through a lot. I've seen young boys passing through family issues start taking drugs not to talk of a grown man who lost his job.

Do you know what the community must have been saying and treated him?

You are not nice with your comment, neither is his wife that locked him up. From her story, she's obviously a good wife, but she got it wrong at that point. Just because she's been good dosen't mean we should overlook the bad she did.

Dammm, that man might never forget this. I am certain the moment he gets his shit right (which he eventually will) he will remind her of this.
Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by UnfairLife7(m): 7:10pm On Aug 22, 2023
braine:


You only heard her side of the story, which I'm sure is exaggerated to fit her narrative.

Until I hear the man's side, I will take her "beating" submission with a pinch of salt.
domestic violence is a NO. It's a criminal offence

3 Likes

Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by Nobody: 7:10pm On Aug 22, 2023
If your wife did the same thing her husband did to her, would you be okay with it?
Okechinwadike:
I can bet my life that you are not married, not even in any relationship and you want her to be like you. deceiver

1 Like

Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by kokorokoman: 7:11pm On Aug 22, 2023
Kobojunkie:
She did bad by defending herself from an assailant the only way she knew to which is calling the cops to stop him. So, you would rather she had sat there, with the kids, and taken the assault abi? undecided

If say na man wey dey reason well well, him suppose know say na him supposed to dey apologize to his wife and children for his violent outburst scaring his loved ones the way he did. But sadly, to the average Nigerian, the ego is an excuse not to apologize for wrongs done, rather than a tool showcasing his intelligence. undecided
you make it sound like she managed to escape to the police station while the man was beating her.

The woman arrested the man just to punish him for what he did.
If my wife ever have the mind to arrest me, I do not see myself in that marriage anymore.

If my wife can decide to arrest me to punish me then she can one day decide to pour acid on me just to punish me too and start regretting her actions later when the did has been done already.

I have trust issues and I will find it very defficult to trust my wife again, whats a union without trust?

I grew up in a place were one of our greatest enemy is the police, can't Imangine my own wife taking me to my enemies den.

3 Likes

Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by Etetedet: 7:11pm On Aug 22, 2023
Firstly don't be to hard on yourself. I'm a man and don't support any violence against women. Your actions will put him in check so it doesn't occur again. Make him no come k*ll you by mistake one day. But please continue pleading with him . He'll come around. Also I'm sure you must have said some hurtful words to him. The fact that you are even bold enough to say in public rgat you are the one doing all the finances shows you already have pride in u. All men , including your dad hates that. Whatever you spend in this trying times God will reward you but please don't rub it in his face or make it obvious. Be humble even if you re the bread winner now. Lastly you sound like a really wonderful woman , a good wife and a good mother to your kids. And you obviously love him very much. Please be patient with him. Encourage him in a subtly way and most of all , keep PRAYING FOR HIM. God will take charge. Allow him vex him vex. He will eventually forgive you and won't dare raise his hands on you again if not him no say nah alagbon him go end up. Hahahahahaha
Verokeena:
Good afternoon Nl family
Please pardon my epistle

My husband lost his job two years ago and ever since he has been so reluctant on getting another.. not to brag but I can say I have been the one keeping the family going ever since the job incidence (not like I ever complained) .

What I noticed about him is he now drinks and smokes and he is always hissing (obviously he is not happy and I try to always console him just to elate his Spirit)

Fast forward to last two months.. I got back from work and I was very tired.. I had to go pick the kids from school , bathe them, feed them and to make matters worst I wasn't feeling too alright .. (when I got home he (my husband) wasn't at home)

When I was done with the kids and fixing the house I was so tired I thought to myself to take a lil nap that was how I slept off (and this was around 9pm) ..

He got back around 10pm obviously drunk and smelling like a skunk.. he went straight to the kitchen. That was how the whole problem started.. first was insult.. then my phone, smashed it on the ground later my clothes he started tearing them .. saying all those things he was destroying was why I was feeling untouchable that he knows I have male friends sleeping with me..

I tried securing my items so he doesn't destroy more things that was how he pounced on me..

The next day I got him arrested he spent two days there.. but now I feel so guilty... He doesn't talk to me anymore.. I have apologized times without number

I don't just know what to do...


Nb: even while he was there I was still taking food to him
Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by braine(m): 7:11pm On Aug 22, 2023
UnfairLife7:
domestic violence is a NO. It's a criminal offence

So why is she still begging him? She should go na. Abi?

1 Like

Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by Kobojunkie: 7:11pm On Aug 22, 2023
braine:
â–  Call a spade by its name. The marriage is gone.
The marriage is gone cause of his actions or hers? undecided

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by cutesharon(f): 7:11pm On Aug 22, 2023
Any law against a man cooking his own food especially when the woman has gone out to work and fend for his sorry ass. Even if she is talking to a man, and so. Is there a law against that. Someone that should be massaging wife's back for even working for both of them instead of joining his pityful self drinking and complaining. Some women would have carried their bags and disappeared. Nonsense.
occfx:


Yes, but judging the guy from this story may be wrong. Its possible the frustrated man went to the kitchen, didn't find food, ask wife if she cooked and wife is busy on phone with a male friend. Depressed man got violent and smashed phone, wife reacted and he got physical. Wife called male friend, male friend called the police and depressed man was arrested. I may be wrong though but one sided story especially from the female is usually tell to claim victim.

5 Likes 1 Share

Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by missyblissy: 7:12pm On Aug 22, 2023
Op if you know what is good for you and your kids, move out now before he drags you down with him. When one spouse is down, the other holds the forth, which you did. Why will you pick the kids from school when hubby is around to help.

If you act the same way after losing your job, how will you be treated? Please women stop condoning and accepting rubbish. No man should hit a woman no matter the reason. What if he had broken your legs in the process what will happen to your job and kids.

3 Likes 2 Shares

Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by Okechinwadike: 7:12pm On Aug 22, 2023
Verokeena:



I have never ever nortured such thought.. I have endured countless insults and provocations..

What else could I have done.. ? Like I said I regret my actions but I just wished he had never touched me or raising his hands to the kids.. saying he doesn't even know if the kids were his.. since he lost his job it has been one issue to another.. but I try to see through his eyes .. to understand what he is going through..

I do not have excuse for my actions.. I just need a solution

Thanks for your contributions anyways
you lied, if he comes back and see food there will be no quarrel. You just paint the talk,say it where it will favour you

2 Likes

Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by braine(m): 7:12pm On Aug 22, 2023
Kobojunkie:
Again, Men without money turn into animals and attack their family members. Is that what you are saying? undecided

I am not saying that. But no one is beyond provocation.

She should go if truly he's an animal.
Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by GistFullGround: 7:12pm On Aug 22, 2023
You arrested your husband
Keep watching Hollywood movies!
Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by UnfairLife7(m): 7:12pm On Aug 22, 2023
Jman06:
What has the wife done to help him get a job or start a business since she's working! If the reverse was the case, I'm sure the man would have started some business for her, why couldn't she do same for her husband?? I thought that in marriage, two becomes one.

I don't support the man for resorting to violence but he was obviously frustrated and his "better half" couldn't help him stand on his feet again.

People like you always blame men in everything while absolving women of blames and it's bad!
domestic violence is a capital NO. I don't tolorate or condole that

1 Like 1 Share

Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by Kobojunkie: 7:13pm On Aug 22, 2023
Beverlyjean:
â–  Always understand that after said and done , all advising u will not be there when the repercussions start... ur inlaws already will have their reservations today's u , so as his friends ... I am a married woman and this is not good .... this is really bad... the children are the ones I pity, they will never experience a home again
What does it matter what reservations Osinachi's inlaws have or had? She is six-feet under.... she refused to call the cops. So does it all matter what people think at the end of the day? undecided

1 Like

Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by Beverlyjean(f): 7:14pm On Aug 22, 2023
UnfairLife7:
what is there again sir? You said she has lost her hubby isn't it? And i am telling you Op hubby lost his precious wife instead. A woman who fed him for 2 years without his penny. You still have the efrontry to destroy properties in the house and hit his wife. What do you expect the woman to do please? Allow him disfigure her face like you lots do to an average Naija woman?


Had he not been feeding her for years , sponsored wedding , put a roof over her head... u think its easy to see men that are willing to take care of their wives these days??

3 Likes

Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by braine(m): 7:14pm On Aug 22, 2023
Kobojunkie:
The marriage is gone cause of his actions or hers? undecided

Well, they both messed up.

But the extent the matter has gone, they should simply go their separate ways.

2 Likes

Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by UnfairLife7(m): 7:14pm On Aug 22, 2023
braine:


So why is she still begging him? She should go na. Abi?
The man lose. He lost a woman who could put up with him for 2 years without any source of income.
Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by Kobojunkie: 7:14pm On Aug 22, 2023
lawrenzooo:
â–  If you go to a bear parlour sometimes you don't need money to get a drink. There is always that journey good fellow ready to you a drink.
So, the man could not have at least helped out his wife at home who had been playing superwoman all the two years he was without work. Na beer parlor him know to make connections for? undecided
Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by Procashtips(m): 7:15pm On Aug 22, 2023
UnfairLife7:
because i know how violence men are to women. Domestic violence, rapist, assault, robbery, cyber fraud, pick pocket, hooligans et al. All these are men handwork

Try dey talk true no matter how bitter it is

Assumption is actually one of the lows of intelligence.

Because some Nigerians are known to be fraudsters means I should believe you and every member of your family are fraudsters because someone said so, afterall, you guys are Nigerian?

How does the above sound?
Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by AZControversial(m): 7:15pm On Aug 22, 2023
sad

Woman, you may have reacted fairly given the circumstance. But watch your back henceforth.

Involve family members coz their intervention is highly needed right now.
Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by Kobojunkie: 7:15pm On Aug 22, 2023
braine:
â–  This is no longer necessary. The man won't do anything for/to her. The marriage is dead now, so no need for further drama.
Better the marriage die than the woman die leaving her kids orphans abeg! undecided

1 Like 1 Share

Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by BRATISLAVA: 7:16pm On Aug 22, 2023
royalfly:


My dear, you not married neither do you know the full details of that story. If the man is truly wrong, let him be hanged. Don't use one story to generalize even the woman understands but u claiming osinachi this and that. Marraige nor be movie,

My dear, who is not married? You are not married yourself, neither do you know the full details of the beatings he gave her that made her resort to getting him where he belongs.

If he didn't beat her he wouldn't be hanged. But since he had, what other defense do you have for him?

Marriage is not a do or die affair. Ask Osinachi if she still thinks it is.

1 Like

Re: The Guilt Of Locking My Husband Up For Two Days by Beverlyjean(f): 7:16pm On Aug 22, 2023
Samantha124:
If you're comfortable with your husband breaking your dishes and beating you up like a punching bag, then who am I to judge?

Marry first , b4 u Start to join conversations like this ... this is reality and not social media or big brother

2 Likes

(1) (2) (3) ... (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10) (11) ... (39) (Reply)

Lady Dies In Accident At Cele Mile 2,Lagos?(pics / My Husband Is Boldly Cheating On Me, Help / This Is Why Women Tie Their Husbands With Juju - Chinenye Azubuike

Viewing this topic: 2 guest(s)

(Go Up)

Sections: politics (1) business autos (1) jobs (1) career education (1) romance computers phones travel sports fashion health
religion celebs tv-movies music-radio literature webmasters programming techmarket

Links: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10)

Nairaland - Copyright © 2005 - 2024 Oluwaseun Osewa. All rights reserved. See How To Advertise. 75
Disclaimer: Every Nairaland member is solely responsible for anything that he/she posts or uploads on Nairaland.