I and My wife have been married for 5 years. We are based here in Lagos. She's 35 years old. We are doing very okay and living comfortably. Since we got married, my wife hated sex so much. I am not even trying to sugarcoat this. She doesn't want to hear you talk about it or she does it. There's no one in the family that haven't tried to settle our differences since we got married. She was never like this when we were dating. It's been 1 issue to the other. She doesn't initiate sex, and when she does accept you to have sex, it's missionary style and it's just 1 round. Ah, me wey dey like knack wella. This woman begin change am for me. Lol. She doesn't want to hear you discuss sex.

Anyway sha, lets move on...

5 YEARS ago, her mum came to my house to kneel down and tell me I am stressing her daughter that I should not kill her with sex. Her then-unmarried sister then asked if I ama dog? Ah, insult. Anyway, I don forgive her. I spoke to my wife and told her what is the meaning of this? What kind of lies are you feeding your family with? This is the same person who happens to make just 1 round of sex. Just 1 round. She lies flat on her back. Once you are done, she quickly pushes you away if you stay on top of her for more than 10 to 15 minutes. There were times she would hit me if I try to initiate sex. I reported to her elder brother. He elder brother warned her. She stopped. She moved to kicking me anytime we initiate sex on bed, i reported to my pastor, he spoke to her and then, she stopped. My pastor told me i have to be patient with her. I said OK.

Omo...
The only time we make love is just 1 round, missionary style and that's it. She says she has pain on her stomach. I have been patient for 5 years with her. I told her anytime she's strong enough, we can make out. That there's no problem.

I have been pressured to cheat on her many times. i HAVE BEEN REALLY PRESSURED. Its just not easy. Her family have insulted me for demanding sex from her. Lol. The thing tire me. I see no where i am demanding. We don't do any other position apart from the missionary style. We do not even kiss. This is a woman that doesn't want you to kiss in in anyway. Even sometimes, she shouts at you when you try to be romantic to kiss her unexpectedly just to spies up our love life. She doesn't even want you to cuddle her on bed. She wants to be alone. Make money, attend to her business, vibes, laugh with friends and family and that's it. When it comes to sex, don't go there discussing that with her about making out.

I even had to retort to preparing her mind for sex by sending her a position we would try on WhatsApp, she would leave the message on read and not respond. When you talk to her about what you sent to her, she would just tell you, she's not strong to make love.

ANOTHER PART OF HER:
My wife is a very bitter person full of anger. If you try to tickle her when she's cooking in the kitchen to play with her, she gets angry and warns you not to try such. My wife doesn't want you to play with her. I am not writing all these to make it look I am a victim here. But all these are my experiences. I have to pour it out. I NEED SOME ADVICE.

There were many times, we agreed on separating. But we have already children and we used to think about these because the quarrels and the disrespect, sex and everything is causing a whole lot on us.

We do not have any form of healthy discussion very well. Before you know it, we are quarrelling over the place, she's shouting. There was a time we quarrelled that after throwing a Gotv remote at her, she fainted. She woke up before we got to the hospital. She almost died. I told her, she needs to stop her anger and control herself and enjoy her marriage. She just won't listen. She's an Edo woman.

I have tried many times to leave the marriage because it's affecting my mental health. Sometimes I regret about getting married to her. Sometimes, I just feel, maybe I CAN TRY MORE and give her a chance. When you call her to discuss our sex life, about her anger and bitterness, she doesn't apologise. She hardly apologise. Even when I get to explain her part on why she was wrong, she claims she's right until maybe someone hears us arguing before she would reluctantly apologise.

I have been battling a really starved sex life, full of a woman with bitterness, anger and pride who never apologise. She's quick to advice other women on Facebook, She would video call friends, give them advice and her family how they need to maintain peace with their relationship. But she never seem to give me respect in anyway in her own own. Hmmmm.

Recently, my wife brought out another timetable that she cannot cope making out with me the way she does. Which is 3 times a week. That she can only be available to make love 2 times a week. This 2 times is just 1 round each. This is how she wants it. I immediately responded to her that I feel her pain. I understand. She cannot be pressured just to make it look like she wants to please me that I would rather get a side chic. Yes, i know this was wrong to tell her, but i am frustrated. She disrespects me and starve me of sex and she's even bending the rules again. She responded that 'ok that I am free to do what i LIKE'.

i decided to bring this here to know the comments from people. I would like to get advice from persons who are going through similar things like this and advice me on what to do.

Some of you might say, call her and talk to her. I have done that several times since in the last 5years. I did it last night and twice today. I have spoken to her. She promised she would change, she would not only repeat the same thing but make things worst the next time.

She disrespects me a lot. I have sometimes left the house but come back after families get to call me. She would change for a week and return to her old self.

What do I DO? Please make your responses constructive enough.

Hahahahaha.........
One woman' one man marriage... You go explain tire.... No fuckin evidence.....

Bro u don't need advice, u are just simp that don't want to repent..... How can ur mother-inlaw involve in ur marriage sex life..........

Maybe You are not her dream man

That Woman Married you because of Marriage pressure not because she loves you.

There is no way a woman who loves, Cares and has feelings will not like to do anything with you no matter how angry she is.

Do what you have to do

talented321:
Hahahahaha.........

Why are you laughing. This is not funny. I need help. What do I do?

She is the provider that's why else as man you are the one that makes the rules

Divorce or cheat 😒

Hmm. SMH. But first of all Lemme book spcae na only comment I wan read.

Options:

1. Continue putting up with it and stay committed to her.

2. Marry second wife

3. Cheat

4. Divorce.

I'm not asking or encouraging you towards any of them please. Just laying out the options for you.

So YOU visualise and weigh the possible consequences and benefits of each action and choose which one you'd like to go with there.

addmole:
I and My wife have been married for 5 years. We are based here in Lagos. She's 35 years old. We are doing very okay and living comfortably. Since we got married, my wife hated sex so much. I am not even trying to sugarcoat this. She doesn't want to hear you talk about it or she does it. There's no one in the family that haven't tried to settle our differences since we got married. She was never like this when we were dating. It's been 1 issue to the other. She doesn't initiate sex, and when she does accept you to have sex, it's missionary style and it's just 1 round. Ah, me wey dey like knack wella. This woman begin change am for me. Lol. She doesn't want to hear you discuss sex.

Anyway sha, lets move on...

5 YEARS ago, her mum came to my house to kneel down and tell me I am stressing her daughter that I should not kill her with sex. Her then-unmarried sister then asked if I ama dog? Ah, insult. Anyway, I don forgive her. I spoke to my wife and told her what is the meaning of this? What kind of lies are you feeding your family with? This is the same person who happens to make just 1 round of sex. Just 1 round. She lies flat on her back. Once you are done, she quickly pushes you away if you stay on top of her for more than 10 to 15 minutes. There were times she would hit me if I try to initiate sex. I reported to her elder brother. He elder brother warned her. She stopped. She moved to kicking me anytime we initiate sex on bed, i reported to my pastor, he spoke to her and then, she stopped. My pastor told me i have to be patient with her. I said OK.

Omo...
The only time we make love is just 1 round, missionary style and that's it. She says she has pain on her stomach. I have been patient for 7 years with her. I told her anytime she's strong enough, we can make out. That there's no problem.

I have been pressured to cheat on her many times. i HAVE BEEN REALLY PRESSURED. Its just not easy. Her family have insulted me for demanding sex from her. Lol. The thing tire me. I see no where i am demanding. We don't do any other position apart from the missionary style. We do not even kiss. This is a woman that doesn't want you to kiss in in anyway. Even sometimes, she shouts at you when you try to be romantic to kiss her unexpectedly just to spies up our love life. She doesn't even want you to cuddle her on bed. She wants to be alone. Make money, attend to her business, vibes, laugh with friends and family and that's it. When it comes to sex, don't go there discussing that with her about making out.

I even had to retort to preparing her mind for sex by sending her a position we would try on WhatsApp, she would leave the message on read and not respond. When you talk to her about what you sent to her, she would just tell you, she's not strong to make love.

ANOTHER PART OF HER:
My wife is a very bitter person full of anger. If you try to tickle her when she's cooking in the kitchen to play with her, she gets angry and warns you not to try such. My wife doesn't want you to play with her. I am not writing all these to make it look I am a victim here. But all these are my experiences. I have to pour it out. I NEED SOME ADVICE.

There were many times, we agreed on separating. But we have already children and we used to think about these because the quarrels and the disrespect, sex and everything is causing a whole lot on us.

We do not have any form of healthy discussion very well. Before you know it, we are quarrelling over the place, she's shouting. There was a time we quarrelled that after throwing a Gotv remote at her, she fainted. She woke up before we got to the hospital. She almost died. I told her, she needs to stop her anger and control herself and enjoy her marriage. She just won't listen. She's an Edo woman.

I have tried many times to leave the marriage because it's affecting my mental health. Sometimes I regret about getting married to her. Sometimes, I just feel, maybe I CAN TRY MORE and give her a chance. When you call her to discuss our sex life, about her anger and bitterness, she doesn't apologise. She hardly apologise. Even when I get to explain her part on why she was wrong, she claims she's right until maybe someone hears us arguing before she would reluctantly apologise.

I have been battling a really starved sex life, full of a woman with bitterness, anger and pride who never apologise. She's quick to advice other women on Facebook, She would video call friends, give them advice and her family how they need to maintain peace with their relationship. But she never seem to give me respect in anyway in her own own. Hmmmm.

Recently, my wife brought out another timetable that she cannot cope making out with me the way she does. Which is 3 times a week. That she can only be available to make love 2 times a week. This 2 times is just 1 round each. This is how she wants it. I immediately responded to her that I feel her pain. I understand. She cannot be pressured just to make it look like she wants to please me that I would rather get a side chic. Yes, i know this was wrong to tell her, but i am frustrated. She disrespects me and starve me of sex and she's even bending the rules again. She responded that 'ok that I am free to do what i LIKE'.

i decided to bring this here to know the comments from people. I would like to get advice from persons who are going through similar things like this and advice me on what to do.

Some of you might say, call her and talk to her. I have done that several times since in the last 5years. I did it last night and twice today. I have spoken to her. She promised she would change, she would not only repeat the same thing but make things worst the next time.

She disrespects me a lot. I have sometimes left the house but come back after families get to call me. She would change for a week and return to her old self.

What do I DO? Please make your responses constructive enough.

I wonder how this is even an issue. Find side chicks or visit codedruns.com. Na u Dey stress ur self ooo

Move to frontpage. I need constructive responses on what to do.

.

Reason why I tell young men like myself, Dont allow Love becloud your senses of reasoning. Trust me the sign were always right there, you were just blind to it

I used to have what you'd call an Ex then, Same way OP describe his wife was exactly who she is. Twinkling annoys her and she immediately changes it for you, hugs from the back esp when she's in the kitchen immediately changes her mood and get her so angry, Simple romance like hugging (common hugging) she'd push you away, You can't have a healthy and Intelligent talk with her, Always defensive and hardly apologises, Any Play other than the use of mouth to call each other Big head is a No No for her, Loves sleeping like some descendants of Koala, So boring and everything bored you can think of. Firstly, I thought all these happened cuz she's still a Virgin at that age, but I've got Virgin friends that we play and have lotta fun without having sex and are not so boring like she is. Later Got to find out that's just who she was, not cuz she's a virgin or something

So that faithful night we were all loved up on chat and we chatted till she wanted to sleep and told me we'd chat the next day, so we said the lovers Good night and went to bed. But before I got to sleep, I told myself I'm so done with this girl. Normally, she always expects I do the Good morning text first or the Good morning call all the time. But this time, woke up and din call her or text her Good morning, I went bout my normal day activities like she never existed. All those time till in the evening she never call or texted until I uploaded a picture of Myself and my guys chilling bfr we replied the status and of cuz some Rude Bullshit text, I read and din reply.

She called me that night bout twice and I din pick nor returned the call, of course she took to WhatsApp again forming boss lady, I made sure i read and din reply and went to sleep putting my phone on flight mode incase she wanna disturb my sleep with calls.

Oooboy I dabaru that girl head cuz we had no fight the night bfr, we chatted so cool and was even talking bout marriage plans next day she kept calling and calling, pick for where. took her sis phone to call me unknown to me I picked, my people come see cool broken voice that I've not heard in months. I immediately cut and blocked. Any she took to crying on VN telling me if she's done anything forgive me bla bla, But nigga man's mind was made up. She got into depression and every effort her, her friends, her family made to reach out to me, I blocked em all. I moved on. Well after so many months I'm glad to let y'all know she's still single cuz I doubt any guy can be patient with her like I was

So Op the signs were always there, you just turned blind eyes to em.

Another TOTO matter again

Upon say you don choose to Dey chop one soup for the rest of your life, then come still Dey give you timetable of when to chop the same old soup?😂🤲
I’m not supporting you marry a second wife or cheat oo, I’m just saying you should show yourself some love, you’re the price and shouldn’t be under a timetable for marital sex👀

I suspect your wife is going through some sort of childhood trauma…


Maybe rape.


Counseling might help.

Since she gave you the okay to have sex outside… maybe you should take it up.

Something in your wife’s childhood/growing up really messed her up.

But you should have noticed before marriage too.

You dated 2 years before marriage.

Follow her timetable patiently or cheat!

akube34:
I wonder how this is even an issue. Find side chicks or visit codedruns.com. Na u Dey stress ur self ooo

You had to quote the whole thing?

Hnm. I guess your wife may be suffering from hormonal imbalance that may have affected her sexual urge it usually happened to women who has secondary amenorrhoea. Her act is not normal, but trust me you are not the only one in this issue, that's your cross, find your way around it and move on for the sake of peace in your marriage.

Bradford111:
You guys are married for 5 years and you have been patient with her for 7 years again.


I don’t understand that part explain

Nlfpmode

It has been edited. Sorry about that. I was trying to twist the years so her family or she doesn't get to understand this post is about them

brain54:
I suspect your wife is going through some sort of childhood trauma…


Maybe rape.


Counseling might help.

Since she gave you the okay to have sex outside… maybe you should take it up.

Something in your wife’s childhood/growing up really messed her up.

But you should have noticed before marriage too.

You dated 2 years before marriage.

Follow her timetable patiently or cheat!

2 days ago, it was the day set for the 1 round we were supposed to make love, she just said, something is on her face. I wish I can describe it. I was like, why Is it that anytime its when we want to make out is when you must have en excuse, she just shouted at me, that I should go that i dont care. I was like, this was the same person who was jumping and telling me she wants to fix a nose ring. Very healthy and bouncing all over the place, but when it comes to my usual 1 round on the old timetable. She would look for an excuse. Her mother shouted at me that if I want to divorce her, I should go ahead that she's tired of settling our differences.

The demerits of marrying a woman who obviously is the one providing for the family


She was 30 when you married her. You guys are probably age mates or within the same age bracket.

I don't see her respecting you in the nearest future.

Do what you have to do

addmole:
I and My wife have been married for 5 years. We are based here in Lagos. She's 35 years old. We are doing very okay and living comfortably. Since we got married, my wife hated sex so much. I am not even trying to sugarcoat this. She doesn't want to hear you talk about it or she does it. There's no one in the family that haven't tried to settle our differences since we got married. She was never like this when we were dating. It's been 1 issue to the other. She doesn't initiate sex, and when she does accept you to have sex, it's missionary style and it's just 1 round. Ah, me wey dey like knack wella. This woman begin change am for me. Lol. She doesn't want to hear you discuss sex.

Anyway sha, lets move on...

5 YEARS ago, her mum came to my house to kneel down and tell me I am stressing her daughter that I should not kill her with sex. Her then-unmarried sister then asked if I ama dog? Ah, insult. Anyway, I don forgive her. I spoke to my wife and told her what is the meaning of this? What kind of lies are you feeding your family with? This is the same person who happens to make just 1 round of sex. Just 1 round. She lies flat on her back. Once you are done, she quickly pushes you away if you stay on top of her for more than 10 to 15 minutes. There were times she would hit me if I try to initiate sex. I reported to her elder brother. He elder brother warned her. She stopped. She moved to kicking me anytime we initiate sex on bed, i reported to my pastor, he spoke to her and then, she stopped. My pastor told me i have to be patient with her. I said OK.

Omo...
The only time we make love is just 1 round, missionary style and that's it. She says she has pain on her stomach. I have been patient for 5 years with her. I told her anytime she's strong enough, we can make out. That there's no problem.

I have been pressured to cheat on her many times. i HAVE BEEN REALLY PRESSURED. Its just not easy. Her family have insulted me for demanding sex from her. Lol. The thing tire me. I see no where i am demanding. We don't do any other position apart from the missionary style. We do not even kiss. This is a woman that doesn't want you to kiss in in anyway. Even sometimes, she shouts at you when you try to be romantic to kiss her unexpectedly just to spies up our love life. She doesn't even want you to cuddle her on bed. She wants to be alone. Make money, attend to her business, vibes, laugh with friends and family and that's it. When it comes to sex, don't go there discussing that with her about making out.

I even had to retort to preparing her mind for sex by sending her a position we would try on WhatsApp, she would leave the message on read and not respond. When you talk to her about what you sent to her, she would just tell you, she's not strong to make love.

ANOTHER PART OF HER:
My wife is a very bitter person full of anger. If you try to tickle her when she's cooking in the kitchen to play with her, she gets angry and warns you not to try such. My wife doesn't want you to play with her. I am not writing all these to make it look I am a victim here. But all these are my experiences. I have to pour it out. I NEED SOME ADVICE.

There were many times, we agreed on separating. But we have already children and we used to think about these because the quarrels and the disrespect, sex and everything is causing a whole lot on us.

We do not have any form of healthy discussion very well. Before you know it, we are quarrelling over the place, she's shouting. There was a time we quarrelled that after throwing a Gotv remote at her, she fainted. She woke up before we got to the hospital. She almost died. I told her, she needs to stop her anger and control herself and enjoy her marriage. She just won't listen. She's an Edo woman.

I have tried many times to leave the marriage because it's affecting my mental health. Sometimes I regret about getting married to her. Sometimes, I just feel, maybe I CAN TRY MORE and give her a chance. When you call her to discuss our sex life, about her anger and bitterness, she doesn't apologise. She hardly apologise. Even when I get to explain her part on why she was wrong, she claims she's right until maybe someone hears us arguing before she would reluctantly apologise.

I have been battling a really starved sex life, full of a woman with bitterness, anger and pride who never apologise. She's quick to advice other women on Facebook, She would video call friends, give them advice and her family how they need to maintain peace with their relationship. But she never seem to give me respect in anyway in her own own. Hmmmm.

Recently, my wife brought out another timetable that she cannot cope making out with me the way she does. Which is 3 times a week. That she can only be available to make love 2 times a week. This 2 times is just 1 round each. This is how she wants it. I immediately responded to her that I feel her pain. I understand. She cannot be pressured just to make it look like she wants to please me that I would rather get a side chic. Yes, i know this was wrong to tell her, but i am frustrated. She disrespects me and starve me of sex and she's even bending the rules again. She responded that 'ok that I am free to do what i LIKE'.

i decided to bring this here to know the comments from people. I would like to get advice from persons who are going through similar things like this and advice me on what to do.

Some of you might say, call her and talk to her. I have done that several times since in the last 5years. I did it last night and twice today. I have spoken to her. She promised she would change, she would not only repeat the same thing but make things worst the next time.

She disrespects me a lot. I have sometimes left the house but come back after families get to call me. She would change for a week and return to her old self.

What do I DO? Please make your responses constructive enough.

Both of you need to see a sex therapist. It is going to cost you guys but you need it. That is one.
Secondly, from my experience, women who don't like sex to the extreme as your case are women who have either been raped in the past or have had some sort of circumcision.
Thirdly, OP diet goes a long way as your wife has low libido. Believe it or not. By the time you start natural sex enhancing diets at least 3-4 times weekly for 1 month. Trust me your wife will run begging you. Try these steps mentioned and thank me later. God bless and keep your home.

C2Ok:

You had to quote the whole thing?

is that a problem?

addmole:


2 days ago, it was the day set for the 1 round we were supposed to make love, she just said, something is on her face. I wish I can describe it. I was like, why Is it that anytime its when we want to make out is when you must have en excuse, she just shouted at me, that I should go that i dont care. I was like, this was the same person who was jumping and telling me she wants to fix a nose ring. Very healthy and bouncing all over the place, but when it comes to my usual 1 round on the old timetable. She would look for an excuse. Her mother shouted at me that if I want to divorce her, I should go ahead that she's tired of settling our differences.

Chai.

This is so sad. Those guys don't have 1 single respect for you.

What could possibly be the reason?

A man without respect is a walking dead.

spice123:

Both of you need to see a sex therapist. It is going to cost you guys but you need it. That is one.
Secondly, from my experience, women who don't like sex to the extreme as your case are women who have either been raped in the past or have had some sort of circumcision.
Thirdly, OP diet goes a long way as your wife has low libido. Believe it or not. By the time you start natural sex enhancing diets at least 3-4 times weekly for 1 month. Trust me your wife will run begging you. Try these steps mentioned and thank me later. God bless and keep your home.

Did you read the part where he said that the wife was not like this before he married her?

OP
Did you marry your wife as a virgin?
Give me an answer
Got a remedy for you..............

Evestar200:
Maybe You are not her dream man

That Woman Married you because of Marriage pressure not because she loves you.

There is no way a woman who loves, Cares and has feelings will not like to do anything with you no matter how angry she is.

This has nothing to do with dream man. Many women don't marry their dream men, because their dream men don't even consider them as spec. That's why there are so many baby mama's because most of them try to trap their "dream man" with pregnancy, but end up finding out the man doesn't want them in his future.

@OP, it could be hormone, especially if it happened after she had kids. Pregnancy can really mess up a woman. Go to a hormonal doctor let them tell you the test to run.

Samakus:



Chai.

This is so sad. Those guys don't have 1 single respect for you.

What could possibly be the reason?

A man without respect is a walking dead.

They don't respect him because he doesn’t have the balls to cheat, he doesn't have the balls to walk away. They know anytime they beg him, he will come back like a cow.

Get a side chick for one year to relive your tension. Treat your wife like a room mate.

addmole:


Why are you laughing. This is not funny. I need help. What do I do?

the real thing I like is that you said you are a made man and ok,all these things you are complaining about your wife is solvable,the solution?don't let her use sex as a weapon to fight you,be a nice husband but ignore her sexually,she has her pvssy,you have your dick,no one must take undue advantage or Monopoly over the other,restrain your sexual feelings for the time being and stop whining and begging for sex,it demeans a man,it might not be easy but you can explore other avenues to relieve the pressure and times like this exploring a side chick will not be a bad idea and the added bonus of been served collapsed doggy style will make the temptation easy on the mind

SenecaTheYonger:


They don't respect him because he doesn't have the balls to walk away. They know anytime they beg him, he will come back like a cow.

Harsh

addmole:
Move to frontpage. I need constructive responses on what to do.

Move to which frontpage, the responses you have received so far, so you can make use of it...

I hate men that can make a self decision without listening to others opinion....