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Should I Divorce Or Remain Subjected To This Punishment For My Infidelity? - Family (9) - Nairaland

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Re: Should I Divorce Or Remain Subjected To This Punishment For My Infidelity? by Jewessgratitud3: 11:57pm On Nov 06, 2023
Fountainofyouth:


Lol if you notice or can read, you'd see that I referred his insults back to the one who birthed him for proper training since like you, he is quick to insult people unprovoked, but then, I didnt expect you to know better.

Smh . You don cast. Just shamelessly hide your face and crawl back into your hole.
Re: Should I Divorce Or Remain Subjected To This Punishment For My Infidelity? by samcarter3030(m): 12:06am On Nov 07, 2023
Of all d hotels & guest houses? No na. Seek ye a new path. Test your sanity, no offense tho
Re: Should I Divorce Or Remain Subjected To This Punishment For My Infidelity? by Jewessgratitud3: 12:13am On Nov 07, 2023
Fountainofyouth:



Did you see the comment of Op on this thread on the front page? Did you see the way she insulted the woman in her story calling her a hoe and all sorts of names? She even went as far as saying the husband should not forgive her that she can kill her husband, curses on the family and children bla bla bla? Maybe you should go through all her comments on this thread so you'd know that your advice is directed at the wrong person, I for one have made it a personal point of mine to always support women on this forum because of wrong and negative perception these boys here dish out about women, my comment on the front page can attest to that, in fact, most females do not insult themselves here except they are pushed or provoked if they have no choice, and of course there are the few minority that feel they know better with their judgemental insultive utterances on their fellow gender and believe me Op is one of them.

Keep trying so hard. E dey your body.

The woman in the story I criticized is not you or your family member. In fact, your lady thought i was the one in the story ( two confused entities) and now you're trying to hold brief for the woman in the story. what exactly is your own pain and headache in all of these. You just keep going back and forth, trying so hard to make sense but end up sounding more confused. If them hold you here, you go there. Dem hold you there, you go there. You're just all over the place with no clear explanations of what is eating you up.

Just open your mouth and tell kobojunkie in English not to put mouth for my matter. Say what you typed in yoruba in English if you're not ashamed of yourself.
Re: Should I Divorce Or Remain Subjected To This Punishment For My Infidelity? by Kobojunkie: 12:51am On Nov 07, 2023
Fountainofyouth:
Did you see the comment of Op on this thread on the front page? Did you see the way she insulted the woman in her story calling her a hoe and all sorts of names? She even went as far as saying the husband should not forgive her that she can kill her husband, curses on the family and children bla bla bla?
■ Maybe you should go through all her comments on this thread so you'd know that your advice is directed at the wrong person, I for one have made it a personal point of mine to always support women on this forum because of wrong and negative perception these boys here dish out about women, my comment on the front page can attest to that, in fact, most females do not insult themselves here except they are pushed or provoked if they have no choice, and of course there are the few minority that feel they know better with their judgemental insultive utterances on their fellow gender and believe me Op is one of them.
1. Indeed I saw it all. She is most definitely close-minded in her views about a lot of things. I know this and have gone back and forth with her on it too. It probably stems from a hyper-religious background confused with a toxic traditional upbringing which is typical with most women in Nigeria. undecided

2. But does supporting women necessarily mean bullying(body shamming, image bashing, etc.,) those among them who do not share your personal view or outlook in life? It is one thing to say to her "You are foolish for making such a comment," and something entirely different to poke fun at her for not being married and not having kids — that is akin to calling her an evening newspaper same as those silly boys whose existence revolves around trolling women. undecided

Why can't a woman choose to not have a kid or even a man? Why must she be derided for making choices that are different from the ones you and others like you made for yourselves? undecided
Re: Should I Divorce Or Remain Subjected To This Punishment For My Infidelity? by Jewessgratitud3: 1:05am On Nov 07, 2023
Kobojunkie:
1. Indeed I saw it all. She is most definitely close-minded in her views about a lot of things. I know this and have gone back and forth with her on it too. It probably stems from a hyper-religious background confused with a toxic traditional upbringing which is typical with most women in Nigeria. undecided

undecided

Come, don't discuss me like that (@ the bold )with that thing. She has told you to stop talking to me, if you want please dance to her tune. I don't care but please leave me out of your discussions with her make e no be me and you o. I don't go about discussing you with anyone in that manner.
Re: Should I Divorce Or Remain Subjected To This Punishment For My Infidelity? by Emmy000seun(m): 1:48am On Nov 07, 2023
But in a situation whereby the husband travel for greener pasture, and left the wife behind, if such woman cheated on her husband, can she be blamed for that?? Or can we blame the husband that left her behind to fend for the family..
JASONjnr:


Forgiveness is difficult when a woman you share your body with can easily be sexed.

If it wasn't for marriage and the kids involved, I am certain, the man would've ended the relationship long ago.


You don't forgive a cheating wife.


She will definitely do it again and again and even wiser.

If you must forgive the first time, be ready to keep forgiving her.
Re: Should I Divorce Or Remain Subjected To This Punishment For My Infidelity? by Dybala11(m): 2:18am On Nov 07, 2023
mbaise1000:
This is the reason I didn't Mary a woman I woman I really wanted to marry because, I always think that any one who have tasted before will get a go again unless the opportunity did not come, anyways, I didn't believe the story but if by any chance it's true, the best option is not to divorce, because God hates divorce, that is if you are a Christian, though you have defiled the marriage bed which is a ground for divorce in a Christian marriage but the bible continued to say that if you choose that very option, you must remain unmarried for the rest of your life, what that means is that you are encouraged to make peace again with your spouse and continue with the marriage. Because if go ahead again and marry another you are commiting adultry, and the person that marrys you is also commiting adultry, so you are expected to forgive because it's practically impossible for the one that has tasted this sweet thing to desist for the rest of their active life.
For those that are going to be challenging what I said, remember also that the disciples of Jesus Christ told Him that this is very difficult and Jesus told his disciples that this law is not for everyone, it's only for THOSE who will be able to keep it, THOSE are the children of God, if you can't keep it. It will mean that you are not of Jesus Christ
Please which verse of the Bible states that people that got divorced due to the infidelity of their partners should not remarry??
Matthew 19 v 9 says otherwise o.
Re: Should I Divorce Or Remain Subjected To This Punishment For My Infidelity? by Okhuadams(m): 5:35am On Nov 07, 2023
Jewessgratitud3:
"Sir, should I divorce or remain subject to this punishment for my infidelity? Or leave and start a new life without my family? What should I do ?

I am a married woman. I have no problems in my marriage. My husband had just been posted to another city. But I knew a young man when I was younger. We got back in touch. As chance would have it, we ran into each other one day when we were leaving the hospital.

We called each other regularly and saw each other. But I couldn't imagine it could reignite the flame still inside me. Unknown to my husband I told him out and welcomed him home. One day I introduced my husband to him. Everything was fine.

One day I fall so low by sleeping with him in my home. The children returning from school accompanied by my husband caught us in the act.

My husband and the children didn't say anything and my friend also left. Since that day neither my husband nor the children speak to me. No one eats the food I make. No child accepts that I even touch them for their shower. No one asks for my help with their class assignment. My friend also abandoned me.

I begged my husband for forgiveness but nothing. It has already been 11 months that I have lived as a stranger in the house. Their silence weighs on me. I told my parents about this.

My father no longer speaks to me. My mother occasionally only insults and calls me a harlot and stupid. I don't dare tell his family exactly. My husband also didn't tell his family.

I'm so ashamed of what I did. I broke my home. I do not know what to do"
Very simple go and meet the guy that helped you broke ur home and continue from there idiot
Re: Should I Divorce Or Remain Subjected To This Punishment For My Infidelity? by jameschibuike(m): 5:45am On Nov 07, 2023
This is very very bad. You brought another man to your home, slept with him. It's shameful. If to say you were not caught everything would have been normal.
The question here is how long have you been nacking this man.
If your husband for gives you, what is the probability that you will not go and sleep with your ex again.
Re: Should I Divorce Or Remain Subjected To This Punishment For My Infidelity? by Jewessgratitud3: 5:58am On Nov 07, 2023
jameschibuike:
This is very very bad. You brought another man to your home, slept with him. It's shameful. If to say you were not caught everything would have been normal.
The question here is how long have you been nacking this man.
If your husband for gives you, what is the probability that you will not go and sleep with your ex again.

She will still go back. This kind are women of easy virtue. They don't count it as anything.

My happiness is that the man caught her otherwise only God knows the calamity she would brought upon the family.
Re: Should I Divorce Or Remain Subjected To This Punishment For My Infidelity? by jameschibuike(m): 6:04am On Nov 07, 2023
mbaise1000:


I don't think you read my comment or at least you didn't understand it, you need to comprehend before responding,
Was there any place in my comment that I supported what she did?
you can still try again, BTW, claiming to be a Christian doesn't make you a Christian, judging from your comment, you are not a Christian because every Christian will have the capacity to forgive, no matter the gravity of the offense, that's why I said you are not a Christian, and if you had read or understood my comment, you would have also seen where I said that Jesus said that law is not for everyone but for THOSE who can keep it, apparently, you are not among THOSE, so you don't expect everyone to be like you, it's impossible, that law is for the children of God not for those that just claim to be the children of God.
How about you put your pride aside and ask God to show you what been born again mean?


It will only take God to give the husband the ability, grace and power to forgive that woman.
Do you know what it is to bring another man to your matrimonial bed and sleep with him.
She deliberately brought the man, slept with him, might have been slept with the man many time, broke marriage vow.
Like I said. It will only take the help of God for the husband to completely forgive her.
Re: Should I Divorce Or Remain Subjected To This Punishment For My Infidelity? by garriAndsugar: 6:24am On Nov 07, 2023
Jewessgratitud3:


Me go around looking for failed marriage stories? LoL... Can you hear yourself? Who does that? So because you people with your shallow brains exist on Nairaland, if I see any story I feel like sharing, I should not share? Very lame.

You'll come at me with stones and staves hitting and shaming then when I talk back, you act the victim and try to guiit-trip me with your silly cheap blackmail of "you call yourself a born again" cliche thinking I'll be moved? Think again.

If you bring it hot, I'll give you hot. If you bring it cool, I'll give you back measure for measure. Once I'm done, it ends there. That's the only difference between me and you guys.

Buzz off Biko
Ok
Re: Should I Divorce Or Remain Subjected To This Punishment For My Infidelity? by fotadmowmend(m): 6:30am On Nov 07, 2023
Jewessgratitud3:


See them... It's people like you that have normalized adultery to the point you no longer see anything wrong in it. If you have a tradition and understand the gravity of what she has done, you won't be here saying rubbish.

A place where they have very strong traditions ruling marriage, what she did can bring death to the whole family. Her husband and , children will all be wiped out but thank God the man found out and didn't touch her again.

Keep supporting evil until it comes knocking at your door.
Tradition? So she should commit suicide because of her mistake? What she did was wrong but you are not helping situation with you bad mouth

1 Like

Re: Should I Divorce Or Remain Subjected To This Punishment For My Infidelity? by Jewessgratitud3: 6:46am On Nov 07, 2023
fotadmowmend:

Tradition? So she should commit suicide because of her mistake? What she did was wrong but you are not helping situation with you bad mouth

My mouth bad reach the abominable act she committed? How una dey reason like this self? So you don't know marriage is very sacred ? Like her, you think marriage is just mere cohabiting with each other? Marriage is more than physical ties and union. It goes beyond the physical. It is a Union formed and based on spiritual covenant.

Who is saying she should go and commit suicide? Let's call a Spade a spade. What she did was wrong and should be condemned. Stop pampering evil. She'll be forgiven no doubt but let's not pretend like what she did was good so other ladies here won't leverage on that and make it a norm.

A colleague of mine who was dating our chairman back then, got caught and had this to say. I could remember her saying on the lift that day that "aye n~se iru e" meaning the world is doing it. So? You see why we should openly condemn such evil acts?
Re: Should I Divorce Or Remain Subjected To This Punishment For My Infidelity? by amadiwati(m): 8:41am On Nov 07, 2023
11 months is such a long time. Not everyone takes infidelity lightly.
Ask God for direction. Meet a marriage counsellor for advice.

If you walk away, one question that will keep hunting you is "why did you leave your marriage".

Jewessgratitud3:
"Sir, should I divorce or remain subject to this punishment for my infidelity? Or leave and start a new life without my family? What should I do ?

I am a married woman. I have no problems in my marriage. My husband had just been posted to another city. But I knew a young man when I was younger. We got back in touch. As chance would have it, we ran into each other one day when we were leaving the hospital.

We called each other regularly and saw each other. But I couldn't imagine it could reignite the flame still inside me. Unknown to my husband I told him out and welcomed him home. One day I introduced my husband to him. Everything was fine.

One day I fall so low by sleeping with him in my home. The children returning from school accompanied by my husband caught us in the act.

My husband and the children didn't say anything and my friend also left. Since that day neither my husband nor the children speak to me. No one eats the food I make. No child accepts that I even touch them for their shower. No one asks for my help with their class assignment. My friend also abandoned me.

I begged my husband for forgiveness but nothing. It has already been 11 months that I have lived as a stranger in the house. Their silence weighs on me. I told my parents about this.

My father no longer speaks to me. My mother occasionally only insults and calls me a harlot and stupid. I don't dare tell his family exactly. My husband also didn't tell his family.

I'm so ashamed of what I did. I broke my home. I do not know what to do"
Re: Should I Divorce Or Remain Subjected To This Punishment For My Infidelity? by CharlesJok3r: 8:55am On Nov 07, 2023
Another fake story.
Re: Should I Divorce Or Remain Subjected To This Punishment For My Infidelity? by Ifyz0001: 9:09am On Nov 07, 2023
Meet your husband's pastor and explain everything to him, or anyone he respects very much. So they can find ways to settle things.




Before your sin will kill you and later go to hell
Re: Should I Divorce Or Remain Subjected To This Punishment For My Infidelity? by Obieluagu97(m): 9:10am On Nov 07, 2023
It's an insult on your husband, bringing another man into your matrimonial home. Some men will not have you in that same house the next minute.

No need of begging for forgiveness, find your way. If he still needs you, he will look for you.

1 Like

Re: Should I Divorce Or Remain Subjected To This Punishment For My Infidelity? by Pokerface1(m): 9:17am On Nov 07, 2023
The marriage is over, it's dangerous to forgive a cheating wife, because she'd punish you for it and blame it on you, it's either you leave that house and only come and check on your kids. You're a disgrace to womanhood and to the matrimonial oat you swore, too loose to be kept as a wife and bad example to your kids, I'd even suggest the man run a DNA on the kids to be certain..
End
Re: Should I Divorce Or Remain Subjected To This Punishment For My Infidelity? by Akabuking: 9:27am On Nov 07, 2023
mbaise1000:


First, no sane person will support what she did but we are talking about the consequences of what she did, if you can't forgive, just like most people, there are many too who have the heart to forgive, and like I said earlier, that law is not meant gfor everyone, it's meant for THOSE that can follow it, apparently you are not one of those, it's not by force
it's clear that she's asking for forgiveness simply because both side dumped her. To me that is not true repentance. I'm not God, there some things I cannot forgive.
Re: Should I Divorce Or Remain Subjected To This Punishment For My Infidelity? by Akabuking: 9:29am On Nov 07, 2023
Jewessgratitud3:


Leave them make them dey read in part. Given the chance she would do it again. She's not even ready to let go and she already mapped out her plan to be collecting it steady by first introducing the man to her husband so he won't see the man as a threat while she goes ahead with her evil mission unoticed.

I know those kind of women. They always think they are smart.
Exactly, they always think they are Smart. if she wasn't caught in the act, believe me she'll continue. I doubt if that is the first time

1 Like 1 Share

Re: Should I Divorce Or Remain Subjected To This Punishment For My Infidelity? by simimog01: 12:07pm On Nov 07, 2023
Angrymode:


There is no remedy to this! She should shamefully exit herself from the family.

If the case was reversed and the guy was the man was the one who was caught, would your opinion still stand?
Re: Should I Divorce Or Remain Subjected To This Punishment For My Infidelity? by tctrills: 12:38pm On Nov 07, 2023
Jewessgratitud3:


I never said she can't or should not be forgiven. However if after forgiving her the man wants a divorce so be it. You cant force people to remain in marriage they are done with.

Obviously you have forgotten what you wrote but I will remind you and show you how unchristianlly you stands are.

You wrote, "Now imagine if you forgive her just like that, You have given her license to do more.

She even had the audacity to do it on her matrimonial bed. With disease flying every where. She can even kill the man. Such people don't deserve pity. She deserves all the punishment she's getting.

I like the silent treatment the husband and children are giving her. At least now she can perceive her own filth without stressing it to her and she knows she's on her own. This will teach her and others a lesson"

1. According to you, forgiveness only gives the license to commit more sin. I am sure this is a very wrong and false doctrine. Forgiveness does not give anyone the license to sin.

2. You said she does not deserve pity. I agree with you that she deserves her pain because she caused it upon herself but your Bible teaches, moan with those that moan. No good Christian would rejoice in the pains of others. Love your neighbor as yourself. Learn to wish good for others even when the commit sin or make mistakes. That's what Christ would do.

3. Finally you say you love the treatment the husband and the kids are giving to her. So if the family reaches out to you to mediate, would you encourage the husband and kids to keep up with their actions?
Jesus Christ teaches, blessed are the peace makers. As a Christian your interest should be how to bring peace into that family.
Hope you know that there is so much pain in the hearts of the husband and kids. The more they don't forgive the worse it becomes for them. As a Christian you want them to take of that burden from their hearts and forgive their mother and wive.

So sir do you still think you are a born again Christian or better still, do you consider yourself a true follower of Jesus Christ?

1 Like

Re: Should I Divorce Or Remain Subjected To This Punishment For My Infidelity? by Jewessgratitud3: 2:07pm On Nov 07, 2023
tctrills:


Obviously you have forgotten what you wrote but I will remind you and show you how unchristianlly you stands are.

You wrote, "Now imagine if you forgive her just like that, You have given her license to do more.

She even had the audacity to do it on her matrimonial bed. With disease flying every where. She can even kill the man. Such people don't deserve pity. She deserves all the punishment she's getting.

I like the silent treatment the husband and children are giving her. At least now she can perceive her own filth without stressing it to her and she knows she's on her own. This will teach her and others a lesson"

1. According to you, forgiveness only gives the license to commit more sin. I am sure this is a very wrong and false doctrine. Forgiveness does not give anyone the license to sin.

2. You said she does not deserve pity. I agree with you that she deserves her pain because she caused it upon herself but your Bible teaches, moan with those that moan. No good Christian would rejoice in the pains of others. Love your neighbor as yourself. Learn to wish good for others even when the commit sin or make mistakes. That's what Christ would do.

3. Finally you say you love the treatment the husband and the kids are giving to her. So if the family reaches out to you to mediate, would you encourage the husband and kids to keep up with their actions?
Jesus Christ teaches, blessed are the peace makers. As a Christian your interest should be how to bring peace into that family.
Hope you know that there is so much pain in the hearts of the husband and kids. The more they don't forgive the worse it becomes for them. As a Christian you want them to take of that burden from their hearts and forgive their mother and wive.

So sir do you still think you are a born again Christian or better still, do you consider yourself a true follower of Jesus Christ?

Ogar so you're still on this matter? Hian!

Please take note, i said "just like that"... Meaning he will forgive her but not so easily cos needs to make her realize her mistake through some form of punishment or the silent treatment he's giving her otherwise she will go back if he just dusts it off as nothing.

Please always read thoroughly before hyjacking a comment and twisting it to suit your argument.

I'm done here Biko.
Re: Should I Divorce Or Remain Subjected To This Punishment For My Infidelity? by fotadmowmend(m): 5:32pm On Nov 07, 2023
Jewessgratitud3:


My mouth bad reach the abominable act she committed? How una dey reason like this self? So you don't know marriage is very sacred ? Like her, you think marriage is just mere cohabiting with each other? Marriage is more than physical ties and union. It goes beyond the physical. It is a Union formed and based on spiritual covenant.

Who is saying she should go and commit suicide? Let's call a Spade a spade. What she did was wrong and should be condemned. Stop pampering evil. She'll be forgiven no doubt but let's not pretend like what she did was good so other ladies here won't leverage on that and make it a norm.

A colleague of mine who was dating our chairman back then, got caught and had this to say. I could remember her saying on the lift that day that "aye n~se iru e" meaning the world is doing it. So? You see why we should openly condemn such evil acts?

The did has been done. So you can kill her because of that then........
Re: Should I Divorce Or Remain Subjected To This Punishment For My Infidelity? by goldmatrix(m): 8:19pm On Nov 07, 2023
U are here looking for another naira lander to back?
Re: Should I Divorce Or Remain Subjected To This Punishment For My Infidelity? by tctrills: 11:17pm On Nov 07, 2023
Jewessgratitud3:


Ogar so you're still on this matter? Hian!

Please take note, i said "just like that"... Meaning he will forgive her but not so easily cos needs to make her realize her mistake through some form of punishment or the silent treatment he's giving her otherwise she will go back if he just dusts it off as nothing.

Please always read thoroughly before hyjacking a comment and twisting it to suit your argument.

I'm done here Biko.
You are not a very honest person. Even after I posted your comments word for word you are still denying.

Again I don't know which bible teaches you that you should not forgive easily. Are you even sure that you are a Christian.

You have zero Christlike attributes.

1 Like

Re: Should I Divorce Or Remain Subjected To This Punishment For My Infidelity? by Jewessgratitud3: 5:14am On Nov 08, 2023
tctrills:

You are not a very honest person. Even after I posted your comments word for word you are still denying.

Again I don't know which bible teaches you that you should not forgive easily. Are you even sure that you are a Christian.

You have zero Christlike attributes.

Now you're the one who needs to check your life if you're truly a Christian cos you're beginning to sound judgemental. The fact alone that you argue unecessarily and refuse to let a matter die speaks volume of your person and that is not Christlike.

Continue arguing with yourself.
Re: Should I Divorce Or Remain Subjected To This Punishment For My Infidelity? by tctrills: 6:44am On Nov 08, 2023
Jewessgratitud3:


Now you're the one who needs to check your life if you're truly a Christian cos you're beginning to sound judgemental. The fact alone that you argue unecessarily and refuse to let a matter die speaks volume of your person and that is not Christlike.

Continue arguing with yourself.

You are the only person on the thread that boasted about being a born again Christian not me. And you were the one pronouncing harsh judgement on the cheating lady. Do unto others as you want them to do unto you. Always remember the golden rule
Also, beware of your pride, it could lead you to hell. Learn to humble yourself and take correction. Learn to be truly sorry when someone points out your errors.
Take care of yourself Mister born again Christian.

1 Like

Re: Should I Divorce Or Remain Subjected To This Punishment For My Infidelity? by Blue86(m): 9:06am On Nov 08, 2023
The Word of God that created all is not angel Micheal, let alone an angel.
When the push turns to shove in your life, don't forget Jesus is a cry away.
PureNigerDeltanpost=1268278:


🤣🤣🤣 the way you people talk ehmmm fast and pray for what exactly. You dey whyne Angel Michael?
Re: Should I Divorce Or Remain Subjected To This Punishment For My Infidelity? by capnies: 3:16pm On Nov 08, 2023
Jewessgratitud3:


Silly question.

I DON'T EXPECT YOU TO BE INSULTING

APOLOGIZE TO HIM

1 Like

Re: Should I Divorce Or Remain Subjected To This Punishment For My Infidelity? by mbaise1000: 7:42pm On Nov 09, 2023
Akabuking:
it's clear that she's asking for forgiveness simply because both side dumped her. To me that is not true repentance. I'm not God, there some things I cannot forgive.

I didn't say you must forgive, you don't give what you don't have, meanwhile there are people who can forgive, it's in them to forgive and there's a reason they can forgive while you can't forgive, that's why Jesus said that law is not for everyone, it's for those that can keep it, those that keep it and those that don't are not going in the same direction, that's where those that can't forget don't want to see

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