My x wife and I share 3 children together ( 4 years old triplets 2 boys 1 girl). I live in another state due to the nature of my job.

The girl lives with her in Lagos and the boys are with my mother and sister in the village. I rented another apartment for them far away because I don't want my x or her family to come and kidnapped my boys the same way she kidnapped the girl .

My x wife and daughter are going to the village for xmas she want me to give her my mum adress so she can see the boys she said she bought plenty gifts for them .

I refused because the last time she visited she took all 3 children to her parents house only for her to kidnapped the girl leaving behind the boys.

I don't want her to kidnapped my boys and she has threatened to take me to court for custody she said the judge will grant her custody because the children are tender .

I told her to go ahead and report me anywhere she wants. I am scared to loose my boys. I love them so much they are my everything I won't bear to lose them.

My boys are only 4 years old is it true that the judge will grant her custody because they are tender ?


Edited 1 : https://www.nairaland.com/7112098/x-wife-demanding-me-more#112551530



Edited 2: https://www.nairaland.com/7436944/ex-wife-kidnapped-daughter#118450454

Yes!
Of she gets a very good lawyer,especially those hot head human rights/family lawyers, she gets ALL the kids. You will have visitation rights and will be paying for their upkeep.

If I'm in her shoes, my lawyer would have handed me those kids since.

LadyRosa2:
Yes!
Of she gets a very good lawyer,especially those hot head human rights/family lawyers, she gets ALL the kids. You will have visitation rights and will be paying for their upkeep.

If I'm in her shoes, my lawyer would have handed me those kids since.

She abandoned them with me because I wasn't financially buoyant .

This story still de on after all these years.

Foodqueen:
This story still de on after all these years.

Yes ooo she is looking for trouble.

The word 'kidnapped' you used it sounds funny to me,is she not your once wife whom gave birth to those kids;therefore she has right over them.
however,if she go to court there is posibility of her wining you in court.that doesn't mean you won't have the chance to see your kids anymore till they grow younger of age they would know the right.surely,they will come for you as far you will be taking your responsibility over them till time comes

Ofcourse she would get full custody and you get visitation rights. I would advise you let her take care of the kids you just support financially and always pick them up to spend some time with you. The best person to take care of the kids is thier mum. Eventually when they come of age you can be together again.

Prospertochu:



She abandoned them with me because I wasn't financially buoyant .

Oooh!

That's bad. Unfortunately, she will get the kids because they are still too small.

But who the hell leaves a marriage that produces triplet?You don't abandon such rare miracle, but I will never understand why people do somethings you know.

Prospertochu:
■ My x wife and I share 3 children together ( 4 years old triplets 2 boys 1 girl). I live in another state due to the nature of my job. The girl lives with her in Lagos and the boys are with my mother and sister in the village. I rented another apartment for them far away because I don't want my x or her family to come and kidnapped my boys the same way she kidnapped the girl . My x wife and daughter are going to the village for xmas she want me to give her my mum adress so she can see the boys she said she bought plenty gifts for them . I refused because the last time she visited she took all 3 children to her parents house only for her to kidnapped the girl leaving behind the boys. I don't want her to kidnapped my boys and she has threatened to take me to court for custody she said the judge will grant her custody because the children are tender . I told her to go ahead and report me anywhere she wants. I am scared to loose my boys. I love them so much they are my everything I won't bear to lose them. My boys are only 4 years old is it true that the judge will grant her custody because they are tender ?

You say you have the boys but from your own OP, they don't live with you as instead you left them with relatives in the village. So technically, you don't have the boys. Due to the nature of your job, you can't be with the kids during this time that they need at least a parent to care for them so why not allow your wife havd them all until they are old enough and your job no longer keeps you from being with them?

You both ought to seek shared custody of the kids so she can care for them while you can visit them when you are not working but you holding the boys hostage by dumping them in the village is not something any sane person would want for children of that age.

LadyRosa2:
■ Oooh!
That's bad. Unfortunately, she will get the kids because they are still too small.

But who the hell leaves a marriage that produces triplet?You don't abandon such rare miracle, but I will never understand why people do somethings you know.

You need to get the backstory to this story before you continue abeg! Check OP'S previous threads.

Prospertochu:
She abandoned them with me because I wasn't financially buoyant .

She was probably not financially stable at the time too.

Prospertochu:



She abandoned them with me because I wasn't financially buoyant .

The boys are not even living with you but with relatives, that counts against you as you are not in a position to be the primary care giver of the boys.

They are triplets, their separation is not good for their overall development as they have to live and grow under the same roof irrespective of the issues between you and their mother, they are not slices of bread that each of you would choose the ones you want.

Get your state's social care/welfare office involved, to work out an arrangement that would benefit the triplets and that would be in the direction of the 3 children living with their mother while you make provisions for them in terms of feeding, education, healthcare etc and also arrange how often you go visit them, if possible work out time they can come spend some of their school holidays with you and video calling them on WhatsApp must be regular.

In as much as you feel that your mother and sister have been taking good care of the boys, they are just the boys' grandmother and aunt, not their mother who is still alive and not clinically diagnosed to be mentally unstable nor abusing substances.

You both should not allow your egos lead to using your children' lives as a battlefield.

You love your boys so much, but the girl doesn't matter, right? The money you used to rent an apartment for your mom could have been utilized in renting a decent accommodation for your ex wife and kids.

If you had done that, there is no way she would deny you access to your kid if you continue to be a responsible dad. As it is, you are doing more harm to the triplets by separating them.

Do you want them to grow up and begin to see each other as strangers? You guys should sit down and resolve your issues for the kids sake. Life is simple, but people just love to complicate things with their over bloated ego.

You and your ex-wife wahala again. Both of you should act like mature adults and do what's best for the kids with regards to an appropriate custody arrangement that's in their best interests, not you separating them: the girl is with her, while the boys are with your mom and sister in the village (meaning they're not even with you/you're not raising them, which is nonsense on its own).

The way you used the word kidnapped is so annoying, is she not their mother? How can a mother kidnap kids she gave birth to? At the end of the day, you are not the one taking care of the kids, you pushed them to your mother and sister which is not good for their development, that alone has cancelled you for custody in court, your wife is the best option to care for them because they are still little, for me she's to slow, something she should have gotten their custody since if she was really serious about it.

Prospertochu:
My x wife and I share 3 children together ( 4 years old triplets 2 boys 1 girl). I live in another state due to the nature of my job. The girl lives with her in Lagos and the boys are with my mother and sister in the village. I rented another apartment for them far away because I don't want my x or her family to come and kidnapped my boys the same way she kidnapped the girl . My x wife and daughter are going to the village for xmas she want me to give her my mum adress so she can see the boys she said she bought plenty gifts for them . I refused because the last time she visited she took all 3 children to her parents house only for her to kidnapped the girl leaving behind the boys. I don't want her to kidnapped my boys and she has threatened to take me to court for custody she said the judge will grant her custody because the children are tender . I told her to go ahead and report me anywhere she wants. I am scared to loose my boys. I love them so much they are my everything I won't bear to lose them. My boys are only 4 years old is it true that the judge will grant her custody because they are tender ?

Children are not articles. The court will only ask you to handover the children to her if you make yourself and the children available for the litigation. Do what you think is best for you and your children.

Oga release the boys to their mother for proper care and bonding. They need to be with their mom. Do you care to think how they are being affected without bonding with their sister? They should all be with their mum while you go visit them. If you can't cope with their absence, reconcile with your wife for their sake

So you are not taking care of the kids but you don`t want the mother to "kidnap" them? Are you ok?

The kids belong in the care of the mother and father. I feel sorry for them. You people are failing them big time.

Prospertochu:
My x wife and I share 3 children together ( 4 years old triplets 2 boys 1 girl). I live in another state due to the nature of my job. The girl lives with her in Lagos and the boys are with my mother and sister in the village. I rented another apartment for them far away because I don't want my x or her family to come and kidnapped my boys the same way she kidnapped the girl . My x wife and daughter are going to the village for xmas she want me to give her my mum adress so she can see the boys she said she bought plenty gifts for them . I refused because the last time she visited she took all 3 children to her parents house only for her to kidnapped the girl leaving behind the boys. I don't want her to kidnapped my boys and she has threatened to take me to court for custody she said the judge will grant her custody because the children are tender . I told her to go ahead and report me anywhere she wants. I am scared to loose my boys. I love them so much they are my everything I won't bear to lose them. My boys are only 4 years old is it true that the judge will grant her custody because they are tender ?


Edited 1 : https://www.nairaland.com/7112098/x-wife-demanding-me-more#112551530

And the mother doesn`t love them? She can bear the pain? And the boys that you love so much don`t deserve to feel their mother`s love?

Hathor5:


And the mother doesn`t love them? She can bear the pain? And the boys that you love so much don`t deserve to feel their mother`s love?

A real mother doesn't abandoned her children no matter how hard the situations is. If she really cared she wouldn't have abandoned them in the first place. Her ashawo work in Lagos is not going well that's why she want all 3 children with her so she will be receiving a big sum of money from me every month for upkeep or else she won't be able to survive again in Lagos.

Prospertochu:

■ A real mother doesn't abandoned her children no matter how hard the situations is. If she really cared she wouldn't have abandoned them in the first place.
■ Her ashawo work in Lagos is not going well that's why she want all 3 children with her so she will be receiving a big sum of money from me every montj for upkeep or else she won't be able to survive again in Lagos.

A mother can leave her children with the father of the kids which seems to be what you wife did. Going back through your own posts so far, she had no way to care for the kids before now and went off to find herself something doing before then coming back for them.

2. Receiving a big sum from you? How much does she receive now from you for the one child that lives with her?

Also, what proof do you have that she is currently unable to cater for herself and the child with her at this time.

Op, if any of the claims you make here can be proven, then going to court may work out in your favor. Keeping the kids away from their mother at this time even when you obviously have no time for them is cruel on your part.

Kobojunkie:
You need to get the backstory to this story before you continue abeg! Check OP'S previous threads.

Gone through it.
What does the wife need now? After all na she open yansh for a 55k salary earner, still abandoned the children join? Wasn't she aware he was a low-income earner before accepting his spermatozoans?

Tor!

The current arrangement (i.e., split custody) appears OKAY, as long as your triplets are fraternal (i.e., non-identical). Separating non-identical twins is not a big deal, as they have absolutely NOTHING in common apart from the fact that they were born on the same day.

The fact that your ex-wife had previously abandoned those kids depicts gross irresponsibility. Also, the fact that you currently outsource your duty to your mother/sister, in fact, shows a higher level of irresponsibility. In an ideal society, neither of you deserves to have custody of the children.

Prospertochu:


A real mother doesn't abandoned her children no matter how hard the situations is. If she really cared she wouldn't have abandoned them in the first place. Her ashawo work in Lagos is not going well that's why she want all 3 children with her so she will be receiving a big sum of money from me every month for upkeep or else she won't be able to survive again in Lagos.

I hope she gets justice by getting custody of the kids. You don't have any choice, you must pay for their upkeep. Imagine calling the mother of your kids ashawo.
You're not okay

Prospertochu:


A real mother doesn't abandoned her children no matter how hard the situations is. If she really cared she wouldn't have abandoned them in the first place. Her ashawo work in Lagos is not going well that's why she want all 3 children with her so she will be receiving a big sum of money from me every month for upkeep or else she won't be able to survive again in Lagos.

Will the "big sum of money" not go into the upkeep of the 3 children you share with her?

She is your ex-wife but she will never an ex-mother to those little children,

Mess happens op, and a man cannot have it all. Take those kids to their mother, they don't need to be shared among relatives while their mother is still Alive.
It's inhuman and alright wickedness, be a good father and visit frequently.
Divorce is really a mess to fathers.Reason why before you go dancing and celebrating you have found a wife , a man have to think critically.

The Triplets chronicles continue s.

@Op,they are her kids too.Allow her access and if she wants to take them leave her.They need to be together and their mom being the primary caregiver is alive and strong.

Work out something with her.

Prospertochu:


A real mother doesn't abandoned her children no matter how hard the situations is. If she really cared she wouldn't have abandoned them in the first place. Her ashawo work in Lagos is not going well that's why she want all 3 children with her so she will be receiving a big sum of money from me every month for upkeep or else she won't be able to survive again in Lagos.

Lame comeback!
Once they misunderstand how a woman makes her money,the next thing is to call her Ashawo.
Ex husband of Ashawo ,very soon your daughter will be inducted into the profession.

When you were straffing her and cumming freely ,she wasn't Ashawo.
Al the years she nursed those kids with hunger she wasn't Ashawo.
Now that she wants more and went out to hustle,taking one baby along until she finds her footing,she's now Ashawo.

Íshí mebiri gi.

Prospertochu:
My x wife and I share 3 children together ( 4 years old triplets 2 boys 1 girl). I live in another state due to the nature of my job.

The girl lives with her in Lagos and the boys are with my mother and sister in the village. I rented another apartment for them far away because I don't want my x or her family to come and kidnapped my boys the same way she kidnapped the girl .

My x wife and daughter are going to the village for xmas she want me to give her my mum adress so she can see the boys she said she bought plenty gifts for them .

I refused because the last time she visited she took all 3 children to her parents house only for her to kidnapped the girl leaving behind the boys.

I don't want her to kidnapped my boys and she has threatened to take me to court for custody she said the judge will grant her custody because the children are tender .

I told her to go ahead and report me anywhere she wants. I am scared to loose my boys. I love them so much they are my everything I won't bear to lose them.

My boys are only 4 years old is it true that the judge will grant her custody because they are tender ?


Edited 1 : https://www.nairaland.com/7112098/x-wife-demanding-me-more#112551530



Edited 2: https://www.nairaland.com/7436944/ex-wife-kidnapped-daughter#118450454

Keep this issue from court by all means. It is not so hard to find a working condition for all parties involved. Remove your ego first and you will see how easy things can be..

Goodluck!