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What Can I Do About This - Romance (7) - Nairaland

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Re: What Can I Do About This by Vj15(m): 10:57am On Dec 16, 2023
Stamina777:
Hello nairalanders, please I need your advice on this. I work in a bank as a cleaner and I go on errands for bankers in the bank. Am 24 year old and I only have my school start with me. I have an ambition to further my education though.

So their is this lady banker I like so much. I do go on errands for her. She is in her youthful age too but might be a little older than I do. I love her but I don't know how to tell her. I fear she might cast me if I tell her my intentions or I might lose my self respect.

Moreover, I always feel lonely because I rarely socialize. I go on errands because of the tips I make from it. Nobody gives me money for not doing anything. I feel less cared for but I care more about my loved ones even though I only give to them. I feel lonely all the time cry

Please what should I do

Oga no1. Do you really from the dept of your heart want to marry her or you want to keep her as girl friend"chop clean mouth"??
If you want to really marry her and you know you are ready to buy Pampers,pay children school fees and you can take care of a family, then go ahead but if it is for girl friend"chop clean mouth"then please go back to school please you will not loose anything.
No2. Can you endure marrying a bank lady/real Carrier driven woman? Because some of them anyway, not all, some of them are real dangerous professional olosho.
So sincerely ask yourself these early questions and tell yourself the truth first before doing anything.
Re: What Can I Do About This by VeeVeeMyLuv(m): 10:57am On Dec 16, 2023
aremubabs:




I am talking about friendship. Any of them can initiate, and seeing that he is the one who is in love, he should go ahead and try.




There is a lot to learn about her from merely trying to be her friend. He can learn about how she views people who are below her on the organizational chart.




My wife was assistant HM (ceremonial) when I got employment to the school. In fact, it was she who supervised my micro teaching and practically recommended me for employment. I didn't really notice her at the time because I merely assumed that she was married. But one day, I just looked at her long enough and fell in love.




As Assistant HM, she was also in charge of approving or rejecting lesson notes. So, I started from there. I made sure to write my lesson notes on time. I was always the first to submit. And when she made any corrections, I followed it to the letter because I had overheard her once telling someone that she liked people that were teachable.





There was also another duty of hers that I took seriously. She was in charge of planning assembly schedules and other extracurricular activities like drawing a chart for teachers on duty. Whatever week I was on assembly duty, I made the most of it. Assembly started early and ended 5 minutes to first period. At a point, you would often hear her say that "I like when Mr___ is on duty. No stress."





Mind you, the academic gap was there too. She had an NCE and a bachelor's. I was still in my last year because I got university admission late in life.





But I didn't let all these things deter me. I knew I could not just walk up to her and tell her I loved her. I made her like me. Did everything the way she liked it.





Whenever I was on afternoon duty, she always left school at closing time feeling confident that the school was in safe hands until the last child had been picked up. With other teachers, she had to stay until the last child was picked up because of a previous incident of kidnapping.





Whenever she was on afternoon duty herself, I would stay with her to watch over the children until the last one had been picked up. Then, I would help with shutting the gates.





She is my wife today cheesy

This is a great romantic story that ended well in happy ever after. You are fortunate, very fortunate. This is what we call open pure heart 💖. Not arrogance, ego or pride.

But in your case you were older right? 😃

But this op is younger than her and in lower class both in education and level career wise, he even admitted to have issues in his social life. 🤷🙊

Your case is far diff from his.

2 Likes

Re: What Can I Do About This by Exceed15: 10:59am On Dec 16, 2023
outoftheworld:


Use your tongue count your teeth boy.
Are you not ashamed of yourself working as a cleaner in the bank?

I actually meant you should hustle and have a good source of income first.
I'm far older than you, that's why I'm advising you.
I learnt through experience, it's hard to get a nice girl to date you and remain faithful if you can't take care of her. Channel your energy and attention on standing up yourself first, girls can only weigh you down. Besides you can't keep a girl you can't take care of.
If you are doing well financially you can have any girl you want.


You are very stupid to say if he was not ashamed to work as cleaner. Other point you raised made some sense. Would u have preferred he pointed gun on your face and rob you ? Infact you should be given the most foolish person on NL.

2 Likes

Re: What Can I Do About This by NewDea4: 10:59am On Dec 16, 2023
Stamina777:
Hello nairalanders, please I need your advice on this. I work in a bank as a cleaner and I go on errands for bankers in the bank. Am 24 year old and I only have my school start with me. I have an ambition to further my education though.

So their is this lady banker I like so much. I do go on errands for her. She is in her youthful age too but might be a little older than I do. I love her but I don't know how to tell her. I fear she might cast me if I tell her my intentions or I might lose my self respect.

Moreover, I always feel lonely because I rarely socialize. I go on errands because of the tips I make from it. Nobody gives me money for not doing anything. I feel less cared for but I care more about my loved ones even though I only give to them. I feel lonely all the time cry

Please what should I do

Kai! If you tell her she fit break ya head o!
Re: What Can I Do About This by Myhusband(m): 10:59am On Dec 16, 2023
outoftheworld:


Use your tongue count your teeth boy.
Are you not ashamed of yourself working as a cleaner in the bank?

I actually meant you should hustle and have a good source of income first.
I'm far older than you, that's why I'm advising you.
I learnt through experience, it's hard to get a nice girl to date you and remain faithful if you can't take care of her. Channel your energy and attention on standing up yourself first, girls can only weigh you down. Besides you can't keep a girl you can't take care of.
If you are doing well financially you can have any girl you want.


you're a complete mumu, if the guy understand his game he will open the ladies legs yakata and bang her



ladies no get level like that, no be the same Lady wey dey carry yansh give their gateman


I have read of a true life story that a mab went to DNA test of his three kids and it happened that first born was only his own, their gateman owned the two because they had a challenges in having their other kids for long time



make you dey hustle because you want to satisfy a woman you can't satisfy, she go still give that money to someone who go bang her like slave outside
Re: What Can I Do About This by codedearner(m): 11:00am On Dec 16, 2023
It's a work environment, romance will only get you fired. Try to make friends with her for a couple months first.. From there, if you tell her and it's a no. She won't take it personally. But there's an 80% chance it won't work out. This isn't a Nollywood movie and you are not a billionaire in disguise, are you?

1 Like

Re: What Can I Do About This by Lamanii22(f): 11:01am On Dec 16, 2023
TheFreshVanilla:
This is what happens when you watch those youtube Nollywood movies like "How A Poor Cleaner Captured D Heart Of Her Banker Boss". Try your luck. Na slap you go chop.

😂😂😂😂😂 you rendered the OP hopeless straightaaaaa

1 Like

Re: What Can I Do About This by MartinsD12(m): 11:01am On Dec 16, 2023
outoftheworld:


Use your tongue count your teeth boy.
Are you not ashamed of yourself working as a cleaner in the bank?

I actually meant you should hustle and have a good source of income first.
I'm far older than you, that's why I'm advising you.
I learnt through experience, it's hard to get a nice girl to date you and remain faithful if you can't take care of her. Channel your energy and attention on standing up yourself first, girls can only weigh you down. Besides you can't keep a girl you can't take care of.
If you are doing well financially you can have any girl you want.
That's the reality here although others might disagree

1 Like

Re: What Can I Do About This by Exceed15: 11:02am On Dec 16, 2023
Bro , Life is in phases. The level you are now is temporal. Things will change soon. As for starting a relationship with the lady I'd say No. Focus on what brought you there while you build yourself.
Re: What Can I Do About This by Gokuuu(m): 11:04am On Dec 16, 2023
outoftheworld:


Use your tongue count your teeth boy.
Are you not ashamed of yourself working as a cleaner in the bank?

I actually meant you should hustle and have a good source of income first.
I'm far older than you, that's why I'm advising you.
I learnt through experience, it's hard to get a nice girl to date you and remain faithful if you can't take care of her. Channel your energy and attention on standing up yourself first, girls can only weigh you down. Besides you can't keep a girl you can't take care of.
If you are doing well financially you can have any girl you want.
What do you mean by "can't take care of her"
Hmmm na WA, the girl don't have a father or what.this notion is wrong
Re: What Can I Do About This by Superpack589: 11:04am On Dec 16, 2023
Stamina777:
Hello nairalanders, please I need your advice on this. I work in a bank as a cleaner and I go on errands for bankers in the bank. Am 24 year old and I only have my school start with me. I have an ambition to further my education though.

So their is this lady banker I like so much. I do go on errands for her. She is in her youthful age too but might be a little older than I do. I love her but I don't know how to tell her. I fear she might cast me if I tell her my intentions or I might lose my self respect.

Moreover, I always feel lonely because I rarely socialize. I go on errands because of the tips I make from it. Nobody gives me money for not doing anything. I feel less cared for but I care more about my loved ones even though I only give to them. I feel lonely all the time cry

Please what should I do

I use to work as a cleaner in a bank branch a few years ago. I resigned in 2021 after working there for 4 years. During my work there, I was the youngest person in the entire branch so everybody sends me on errands. Those 100, 50 naira change on top was what I was after because they help me alot. After buying the food for my colleagues, I would use their change to also buy for myself too. At a time it became too much as they almost turned my primary job into an errand boy. I had to fight and stop the errands and focus on my future.

At the time, I only had waec which I even failed. It was with that cleaning job that I was able to write Nabteb and then furthered my education. If a school is around you, it will be easier. After morning cleaning, you can just go to class and if nothing is going on in school, you can return to the office and it is important to also have somebody telling you what's going on in school. Before you know it, you will be done with school and have the result to apply for a better position in the bank if you wish to continue working there. You have to focus on your future.

Fast forward to the topic at hand. Most young guys who have worked as cleaners experience this, especially if you are the one running errands for everybody. The ladies especially will treat you very well, you will almost think they like you. Most of them just want to continue using you. And you may just be having that feeling because you feel she can help your life easily.

I think some can be genuine anyway but the challenge is that the gap is too much. Cleaner and banker. They will always look at you lesser except it is just genuine love and the lady loves you too. The chances of this ever working is very slim and the stress is just too much. Both of you will not be able to work in peace in the bank anymore. If she really really loves you, she will tell you to stop running errands for others and will also be commanding you sometimes because she is above you in the office and you will not be able to take this for long. The challenge is just too much.

There was a particular petite lady at the bank where I worked as a cleaner. This lady just liked me. I almost felt she wanted me to be screwing her. She would come to the cleaner's office where I use to sit down most of the time (if there's nothing to do) and just rest her head on my shoulder. My preek go just stand. She does not do this to any other person in the bank. She was so close to me and just like touching me every time. The connection was very visible that my fellow cleaners were even telling me to advance that she was giving me green light. I was just too scared and afraid of doing it abeg. In my own case, I believe I would have been able to nack this lady if I was a bad boy.

Even apart from that particular lady, there were plenty of others in the bank who were just too nice to me that I had feelings for. Many, fine fine girls o. But I'd rather go and stand outside and toast one customer or student (because the bank was close to a big polytechnic) than toast a staff.

The problem is that you are bored. It happened to me too. So after morning cleaning, I would just go upstairs and start pressing my phone.
I loved writing so much and so at a time, I started applying for writing jobs on this nairaland. When I got a job, I would use my free time to do it and that filled up the gap so I was no longer bored because it was like doing two jobs at the same time. I eventually resigned and started writing full time. Now I earn in a month what some of those my former colleagues earn in 6 - 7 months. No jokes.

For now, what you should be focused on is how to build yourself up and get yourself a better future. On the other hand, you will definitely leave there one day so if you want to have some adventures and be able to tell those funny stories later, you can try asking her out. The world will not end. Just do it casually and don't count on her saying yes. She might say no and you move on with your life. Whatever happens from there, you can face it. You are a strong man.

I wish you good luck bro.

6 Likes

Re: What Can I Do About This by Onyiiobi7735(m): 11:06am On Dec 16, 2023
Stamina777:
Hello nairalanders, please I need your advice on this. I work in a bank as a cleaner and I go on errands for bankers in the bank. Am 24 year old and I only have my school start with me. I have an ambition to further my education though.

So their is this lady banker I like so much. I do go on errands for her. She is in her youthful age too but might be a little older than I do. I love her but I don't know how to tell her. I fear she might cast me if I tell her my intentions or I might lose my self respect.

Moreover, I always feel lonely because I rarely socialize. I go on errands because of the tips I make from it. Nobody gives me money for not doing anything. I feel less cared for but I care more about my loved ones even though I only give to them. I feel lonely all the time cry

Please what should I do
Lol! Madness in the air.A mere school cert holder who is still trying to see the four walls of a higher institution, wants to toast a working class degree holder lady, and not to talk of someone older than him.
How does an eagle 🦅 and a pigeon have anything in common?
Lol! Oga, she's way above your league and the earlier you understand this, the better for you.
A 24 year old toasting a lady who might be probably in her early thirties!.
Mr, face your front to avoid avoidable embarrassment, focus on your hustle.
Focus on how to find something better than your cleaner job, and improve your financial status to be stronger,so that you can further your education.
That's what you need.
I can't even imagine a working class lady working in a bank agreeing to date a mere cleaner , not to talk of one who is younger than she is.
Misplaced priorities have dealt seriously with babies of this generation.

3 Likes

Re: What Can I Do About This by femi4: 11:07am On Dec 16, 2023
Stamina777:
Hello nairalanders, please I need your advice on this. I work in a bank as a cleaner and I go on errands for bankers in the bank. Am 24 year old and I only have my school start with me. I have an ambition to further my education though.

So their is this lady banker I like so much. I do go on errands for her. She is in her youthful age too but might be a little older than I do. I love her but I don't know how to tell her. I fear she might cast me if I tell her my intentions or I might lose my self respect.

Moreover, I always feel lonely because I rarely socialize. I go on errands because of the tips I make from it. Nobody gives me money for not doing anything. I feel less cared for but I care more about my loved ones even though I only give to them. I feel lonely all the time cry

Please what should I do
Go n upgrade yourself , then come back and ask her out.

In Fela's voice: " Me n you no dey for the seme category "

1 Like

Re: What Can I Do About This by Chandeliers: 11:11am On Dec 16, 2023
Yeah, everyone deserves love, but there's something called prioritization. Also, forget she's nice, ladies are so sensitive about age difference. Don't leave it to chance. If she's older than you, let's say 3-4 years, she's probably closer to marriage now. Are you ready?

4 Likes

Re: What Can I Do About This by oluala881: 11:11am On Dec 16, 2023
[

Should he go and thief?

There is always someone who will do the menial jobs, and for now, it is him. His situation can change for the better, and such is life.

Dont shame a hardworking person, its disgusting. [You are a bad adviser, may be you can marry him or get someone that means everything to you and also doing well financially to date the guy. Mr I feel your emotion and there is nothing bad in it but for now get your self a good stand, NO BANKER WILL FALL IN LOVE WITH A CLEANER. You need to focus on what matter for now and not toasting a lagy that is higher than you by all standard.]
Re: What Can I Do About This by oluala881: 11:11am On Dec 16, 2023
Stop playing
Re: What Can I Do About This by Jewessgratitud3: 11:13am On Dec 16, 2023
XAUBulls:

Aha! The best advice on page one of this thread. wink

Indeed... a lot of career women are hypergamous, so, in the absence of subtle romantic attraction generated by the OP towards the older female banker, then he's gonna fail!

Even as a high school graduate, if he's able to engage in formal/informal self-development and generate sustainable income from his businesses and/investments, then he can still waltz into the female banker's life and get her to respect him because of his newfound confidence and inner game. Period.





True

1 Like

Re: What Can I Do About This by confydoedowaye(m): 11:14am On Dec 16, 2023
What is the girls body language towards you? Buy her a gift, and always tell her how nice her dress is. Stop collecting tips when u go errands for her. Let her know u see her differently from others. Small small u go dey enter her. One day u go get chance to invite her out for a drink. From there, her body system go dey adjust to Ur kindness.
Re: What Can I Do About This by ojojonkembu: 11:15am On Dec 16, 2023
O! Boy cut ur coat according to your size.focus on how to get a future,not falling in love with someone above ur standard.ok if she gree how do maintain her with ur salary.guy use ur head well.
Re: What Can I Do About This by JasperVII(m): 11:16am On Dec 16, 2023
outoftheworld:


Use your tongue count your teeth boy.
Are you not ashamed of yourself working as a cleaner in the bank?
I wonder why it is you had to use such condescending words on him, just to say something. Nawa for some of you.
Re: What Can I Do About This by udemzyudex(m): 11:17am On Dec 16, 2023
You better face your work.
Re: What Can I Do About This by iLoveYouToo(m): 11:18am On Dec 16, 2023
Stamina777:
Please what do you mean by this


It means wake up and smell the coffee OR Snap back into reality and stop daydreaming


###
Re: What Can I Do About This by seetomorrow: 11:18am On Dec 16, 2023
Stamina777:
Please what do you mean by this

Use your sense is the meaning
Re: What Can I Do About This by udemzyudex(m): 11:18am On Dec 16, 2023
Ballzproblem2:
is he not a human being? na una type they push youths into crime

To getting a better paying job na crime now?
Re: What Can I Do About This by NinjaMetahuman: 11:19am On Dec 16, 2023
outoftheworld:


Use your tongue count your teeth boy.
Are you not ashamed of yourself working as a cleaner in the bank?

I actually meant you should hustle and have a good source of income first.
I'm far older than you, that's why I'm advising you.
I learnt through experience, it's hard to get a nice girl to date you and remain faithful if you can't take care of her. Channel your energy and attention on standing up yourself first, girls can only weigh you down. Besides you can't keep a girl you can't take care of.
If you are doing well financially you can have any girl you want.
you deserve a dirty slap for this absolute ridiculous comment.
Like you deserve a ban too.

So going to work to do the work you are too lazy to do is not hustle enough for someone with humble beginning?
What kind of hustle do you expect from someone with just a school certificate? Yahoo? Ritual?

I'm sure someone is either still feeding this fool or he is getting money from crime.

1 Like

Re: What Can I Do About This by Superpack589: 11:19am On Dec 16, 2023
bigpicture001:
simply dont tell her nomata what... female bankers have the highest ego a nigerian human can have...if sh is the one fancying u ,its a different ball game ...if u try it, sh will insult u nd tell her colleague..

female bankers are too full of pride..they date only thier rich customers

Lol. I laugh eh. Especially marketers. They like rich customers o.
Re: What Can I Do About This by MuslimIgbo: 11:19am On Dec 16, 2023
pansophist:


Should he go and thief?

There is always someone who will do the menial jobs, and for now, it is him. His situation can change for the better, and such is life.

Dont shame a hardworking person, its disgusting.
What's disgusting in shaming a deluded poor lowlife who doesn't know his place?
An illiterate young cleaner boy chasing his banker boss of boss . Do you have SENSE at all?
If your banker sister or daughter bring such person home as a lover, won't you assume something is wrong?
Re: What Can I Do About This by Dennisochampa: 11:20am On Dec 16, 2023
U don too watch Nigerian movies...
U know say for 9ja movies.... Cleaner go fall in love with ceo come become big boy...
No offense Sha but even your English show say alot of issues dey with you when u suppose focus on rather than woman matter.....
That being said.... Build yourself up first....
Because telling her you love her might make u either lose your job or make you a subject of ridicule among she and her fellow colleagues...
While what you're doing may seem reasonable, in today's world, such gestures are not appreciated.
My advice, face your work... Polish yourself and when you're up there.... You might find a better person than the woman....
Take care and God bless you.
Re: What Can I Do About This by Dennisochampa: 11:21am On Dec 16, 2023
MuslimIgbo:

What's disgusting in shaming a deluded poor lowlife who doesn't know his place.
An illiterate young cleaner boy chasing his banker boss of boss . Do you have SENSE at all.
If your banker sister or daughter bring such person home as a lover, won't you assume something is wrong?
..... Give me one reason why you're insulting him
Did he seek for insults or advise??
Re: What Can I Do About This by Dennisochampa: 11:24am On Dec 16, 2023
Ballzproblem2:
is he not a human being? na una type they push youths into crime
....
Nobody said he's not a human...
But he needs to work more on himself at this stage of his life...
If he was 28 and above, yes maybe it would have been right but at 24,where would such a relationship lead??
Going by his post, the lady should be around 26-28....this means that she's most likely ready for marriage..... At 24 and a cleaner, what will he offer in marriage or he wants to he in a marriage where a woman will be the provider in the home?
I honestly think he needs to focus more on self development now more than dating an older and a senior colleague at his place of work.
Re: What Can I Do About This by Dennisochampa: 11:27am On Dec 16, 2023
garriAndsugar:
I'd advice you shoot your shot, highest you will get a no.

Talking about she casting you, if she's the kind that talks too much you can abort mission
......
Question bro....
If your elder sister brings a 24 yrs old cleaner colleague of hers home for marriage.....
A guy she's clearly older than.... Will u, as a loving brother support her decision??

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