My marriage is 2 years old now , me and my wife didn’t date very long before we got married (like 3 months) this was because I’m a man who believes in having my family early and there’s nothing more important to me than my family.

My wife is heavily pregnant and almost ready to put to bed anytime soon. The issue now is that my wife has become very controlling, I saw these signs early in our marriage but Ignored them because I want our marriage to work, The biggest turn off for me is a controlling woman .

My wife comes from a broken home , the father left she was was little , I don’t really know why the dad left her mom and till date the reason why her dad left is a very flimsy excuse ( said the mom was buying properties without his consent ) , so right now the children hate the father. I have advised my wife severally to reach out to the father and ask what really happened that made him leave his family because I feel there’s something else to it , but she refused because the mom has taken the children to her side .

Now in our own marriage she wants to be in control, she doesn’t want me to go out , even when I tell her where I’m going she isn’t satisfied.

So recently I started going out on Sundays because throughout the week I’m usually at home and these days I’m usually stressed out , so I like to go out and relax on my own .
there's a spot I usually go to watch football matches every Sunday, I told her I was going yesterday to watch match and she told me I’ve turned it into an habit to be going out everyday , I asked her can’t I go out ? And her reply was “ What’s the wrong with you ? Why would you answer me like that” I became angry and told her that anytime I want to leave the house she always has a problem with it even before she became pregnant. Most times she always wants to go with me. We have quarreled severally about it , she don’t want me to go out , she wants me to be home on time , she always call me to know where I am or what I’m doing even when I’m in a business meeting. She recently told me she regrets marrying me and I still try to wonder what I did for her to say that. She said I come home reeking of alcohol every time I go out , calling me a drunkard . When I go out I only drink pepper soup and 1 black bullet. People outside who hear her will think I usually come home staggering drunk


And another attitude of hers is that she’s ready to leave the marriage at anytime, she doesn’t care
Any little things she will say “ I will just leave this marriage “. When me as a man I don’t even see leaving the marriage as an option.

She want to control my every move , when I want to do something and I tell her about it , she wants me to do it her own way and I’ve told her severally that it won’t be possible for me to do everything she says .
She also believes we are both equal and anything I do she also can do. Mind you I haven’t had sex with another woman in 2 years so it’s not a case of cheating.

I don’t know if it’s the family she grew up in where a woman is the head and now she wants to bring it into our marriage and also treat me like her elder brother who they even dictate the kind of girl he follows .


So I’m just trying to make things work out for the sake of our marriage and our baby but if she doesn’t change then I’m done.

I don’t know if I should speak to her mom about it or just lock up

She has learnt very well from her mother. Women raised by single mothers are usually terrible in marriages. They often show less interest in being submissive to any man. They've already had a terrible mindset towards men.

Didn't you notice all these before marrying her?

You were obviously carried away with other things while neglecting the important ones, please manage her like that since she's not physically abusive, it rains everywhere you don't know the baggage the next person will bring.

You did not make any comment on the most important aspect of this issue. Is she faithful? If the answer is "Yes" then she simply has insecurities because of her background. She will get better with time.

funkmrflexx:
My marriage is 2 years old now , me and my wife didn’t date very long before we got married (like 3 months) this was because I’m a man who believes in having my family early and there’s nothing more important to me than my family.

The bolded can't be the reason you dated for 3 months. I know the quality of marriage isn't determined by the duration of courtship. Some can date for less than a month and the marriage will peacefully last for a lifetime. Some can date for 10 years but the marriage will end within a year. But my point is what you gave as your reason for dating for 3 months sounds illogical.

funkmrflexx:
And another attitude of hers is that she’s ready to leave the marriage at anytime, she doesn’t care
Any little things she will say “ I will just leave this marriage “.

This red flag is so clear. Did you wed her in a Church? If yes, try your best to diligently play your own part in keeping the marriage vow of "For better for worse". But if you didn't wed her in a Church, the earlier you leave is the better for you because it is not good to postpone an evil day.

She is openly telling you she wants to leave the marriage..lol..big Bleep up.how did you allow it reach this level.As a woman,you cant even tell me this,because I go fess let u know say I dont care if you stay or not and besides ,I am not a marry marry type person.see don see u finish

A woman who despises her Father would despise her husband.
Single mothers have proven to be bad parents most times.
Someone from broken home can hardly keep a marriage.
You have shown yourself to be the weak man and you need to make your stance.
Next time tell to leave the marriage. Better prepare your mind for the worse.
And let her know you self no send.

Are you not a man.
Nawa o
She said she will leave. She already doesn't value marriage or it's values. You are now playing defense to her offensive instead of make you counter attack.

Women are more reactive than active.
She dey react to your fears.

If you fear break-up then you go make mistakes. Tell her. Madam if you want to leave this marriage let me know so I can inform my lawyer. Stop threatening me.

After all I am a man.
Be Bold

How do u people in marriages or relationships survive because everyday on this platform , it's one story or another

I wish you well..

But the deep truth is that she will leave .. whichever way she will.

Except if she repents and understand the scripture.. embrace Jesus Christ..

Aside this

You’re on your own.. Na time.

Yes we wedded in a church

immortalcrown:
The bolded can't be the reason you dated for 3 months. I know the quality of marriage isn't determined by the duration of courtship. Some can date for less than a month and the marriage will peacefully last for a lifetime. Some can date for 10 years but the marriage will end within a year. But my point is what you gave as your reason for dating for 3 months sounds illogical.


This red flag is so clear. Did you wed her in a Church? If yes, try your best to diligently play your own part in keeping the marriage vow of "For better for worse". But if you didn't wed her in a Church, the earlier you leave is the better for you because it is not good to postpone an evil day.

funkmrflexx:
Yes we wedded in a church

In this case, try to endure and cope with her. Whoever determines to follow Jesus Christ should carry his or her cross. Christian faith, at least the Catholic one which I practice, is against divorce.

You've sold your masculinity to her. How can your wife be threatening you with leaving the marriage. Though your saw these signs in your short period of dating her but you chose to ignore them or your focus was just to marry.

Solution
1. Don't report her to any of her parents just yet.
2. Sit her down and talk sense into her head calmly as your wife.
3. Be more Logical when dealing with her and all women.
4. A wife shouldn't dictate what you MUST and MUSTN'T do to you because their emotion is what drives their reasoning.
5. Again, be logical and Lead your Home and Marriage. Remember, women like pushing blame without blaming themselves.

"Before you choose a woman, choose her mother" and also ''Vet a lady raised by a single mother thoroughly before you travel on that road"

Them don use emotional blackmail finish this OP.

Anytime she says she wants to leave, start helping her pack her bags immediately she will stop that nonsense

garriAndsugar:
Them don use emotional blackmail finish this OP.

Anytime she says she wants to leave, start helping her pack her bags immediately she will stop that nonsense

I swear ,what nonsense. Any small thing.Am leaving, like say na by force

The moment you realized she was ready to leave the marriage, your response should be opening the exit door and wishing her good luck.

Never be one trying to make things work, it should be both of you

you ignored the fact that she's from. a brokern home ,now you are reaping the reward for ignoring red flag so why are you acting suprise?

Lol

This your marriage be like mother and son matter.

In order to avoid such mistakes
For a token...this ebook could be yours
WhatsApp 0817917606zero

Well I'm also married, so let say something: in the area of going out, I do not think she's wrong bcus ladies like it when their man is with them, comes home early and help in chores. So maybe you should change some of the things you do. That's my opinion tho'

Yugoslavia247:
A woman who despises her Father would despise her husband.
Single mothers have proven to be bad parents most times.
Someone from broken home can hardly keep a marriage.
You have shown yourself to be the weak man and you need to make your stance.
Next time tell to leave the marriage. Better prepare your mind for the worse.
And let her know you self no send.

Are you not a man.
Nawa o
She said she will leave. She already doesn't value marriage or it's values. You are now playing defense to her offensive instead of make you counter attack.

Women are more reactive than active.
She dey react to your fears.

If you fear break-up then you go make mistakes. Tell her. Madam if you want to leave this marriage let me know so I can inform my lawyer. Stop threatening me.

After all I am a man.
Be Bold

You said everything on my mind.

Make I summarize am in American slang.

Nigga is acting like a puusy.

To be fair,go out more with her instead of going alone, apart from that, the lady needs to be talked to, imagining threatening to leave over every minute difference is a sign that she's not emotionally prepared for marriage.

Aaaaarghmed:
She is openly telling you she wants to leave the marriage..lol..big Bleep up.how did you allow it reach this level.As a woman,you cant even tell me this,because I go fess let u know say I dont care if you stay or not and besides ,I am not a marry marry type person.see don see u finish

That's what she will always use against op,till she frustrate him.. Maybe you should let her know that your life is not tied to the marriage,if she thinks that the marriage supplys you oxygen. Op you are the problem of yourself.. You see fire,put hand..

From your previous posts. I can see you are going through alot and it looks like the issue is you🤔

You are not the biological father of that child in her womb. I am very sure of that.

Anytime she threatens to leave, call her bluff.

Let her know your happiness isn't hinged on her remaining in the marriage. (or is it?)

Never marry a girl raised by single mothers, the mom already poisoned their minds towards their dad so in extension they are going to resent their father and husband , except the males who wouldn’t allow themselves manipulated by their embittered mom, they always look for their dad in the long run

If you investigate proper you will see the mother lied against the father even if he was guilty of a crime, she would have poisoned their minds from little. I am certain this habit your wife is exhibiting was the same reason her dad left her mom, guy man chose peace instead

However I will knock your head heavy for being so naive to wife a girl you met three months ago even tho you saw traces of what you are now complaining of

You claim a woman that controls is a turn off for you but you went ahead to still marry this same girl, be like village people set trap for you and you walked into it

I don’t see you lasting long in this arrangement, and be rest assured she is going to poisoned your kid(s) mind against you just like her mom did


Except the man is dead never agree to marry a girl without her father in the picture no matter the crimes they claimed he committed, as long as he is still alive look for him and hear his side of the story and seek his blessings as well

Welcome to marriage and married woman typology 101. You have to put your foot down. Don't play defense and don't go running to her relatives to report her. Let her know that you are the boss in this house. Instructions and rules come from you and not the other way around.

As a mature man, what you will desire the most is peace of mind in YOUR OWN home. This peace is not a given, you have to fight for it, and demand it, it's just like respect.

If you give people in general, not just women, an inch, they will take a mile. You lie so they trample over you yet they would say you're not flat enough.

Take charge

He who wears the shoe know where it pinches, since your wife is ready to quit Tue marriage I think you should also consider that option at this stage before things degenerate to domestic violence

I feel your pain OP. When people say women raised by single mothers are controlling many won't believe.

I once had a child with one. They ran away with my child, thinking I'll come n kneel down to them.i didn't look back since 2020 till date.

I ghosted them.

funkmrflexx:
My marriage is 2 years old now , me and my wife didn’t date very long before we got married (like 3 months) this was because I’m a man who believes in having my family early and there’s nothing more important to me than my family.

My wife is heavily pregnant and almost ready to put to bed anytime soon. The issue now is that my wife has become very controlling, I saw these signs early in our marriage but Ignored them because I want our marriage to work, The biggest turn off for me is a controlling woman .

My wife comes from a broken home , the father left she was was little , I don’t really know why the dad left her mom and till date the reason why her dad left is a very flimsy excuse ( said the mom was buying properties without his consent ) , so right now the children hate the father. I have advised my wife severally to reach out to the father and ask what really happened that made him leave his family because I feel there’s something else to it , but she refused because the mom has taken the children to her side .

Now in our own marriage she wants to be in control, she doesn’t want me to go out , even when I tell her where I’m going she isn’t satisfied.

So recently I started going out on Sundays because throughout the week I’m usually at home and these days I’m usually stressed out , so I like to go out and relax on my own .
there's a spot I usually go to watch football matches every Sunday, I told her I was going yesterday to watch match and she told me I’ve turned it into an habit to be going out everyday , I asked her can’t I go out ? And her reply was “ What’s the wrong with you ? Why would you answer me like that” I became angry and told her that anytime I want to leave the house she always has a problem with it even before she became pregnant. Most times she always wants to go with me. We have quarreled severally about it , she don’t want me to go out , she wants me to be home on time , she always call me to know where I am or what I’m doing even when I’m in a business meeting. She recently told me she regrets marrying me and I still try to wonder what I did for her to say that. She said I come home reeking of alcohol every time I go out , calling me a drunkard . When I go out I only drink pepper soup and 1 black bullet. People outside who hear her will think I usually come home staggering drunk


And another attitude of hers is that she’s ready to leave the marriage at anytime, she doesn’t care
Any little things she will say “ I will just leave this marriage “. When me as a man I don’t even see leaving the marriage as an option.

She want to control my every move , when I want to do something and I tell her about it , she wants me to do it her own way and I’ve told her severally that it won’t be possible for me to do everything she says .
She also believes we are both equal and anything I do she also can do. Mind you I haven’t had sex with another woman in 2 years so it’s not a case of cheating.

I don’t know if it’s the family she grew up in where a woman is the head and now she wants to bring it into our marriage and also treat me like her elder brother who they even dictate the kind of girl he follows .


So I’m just trying to make things work out for the sake of our marriage and our baby but if she doesn’t change then I’m done.

I don’t know if I should speak to her mom about it or just lock up

Weak man