| Re: Help! My Marriage Is Giving Me Pain. by okine4real: 12:16pm On Mar 04 |
i have learnt one thing in marriage, as a man, make provision for counter attacking your wife when her madness start. If my wife start her wahala, i simply leave the house for her and go stay another of my house. As a man, hustle get money and build house apart from the one you staying and leave a spare room for contingency sake, if her wahala too much, go stay from the house dey go work. I always tell my wife, if you think am poor, then go and make the money yourself, stop giving me stress. if you cant build, go rent one room for far place keep there, the house nor be for to dey carry woman go there ohh, just to go and cool your head, if your wife start wahala. 2 Likes |
| Re: Help! My Marriage Is Giving Me Pain. by PhilipReigns(m): 12:19pm On Mar 04 |
blackpanthar:
I commend your courage sir, to remain with that woman, talk more of being faithful or patient is really a herculean task.
Now to the main matter...
YOU WERE ACTUALLY POOR....(Passing Over Opportunities Repeatedly) in your past but this year EVERYTHING WILL TURN UP FOR YOU.
Do not blame her sir, blame yourself for not understanding the COMMITMENT DEMANDS of marriage before jumping into it.
I wouldn't want to go deep into how this our generation has EXALTED MARRIAGE beyond limits.... it feels like singleness is a disease yet the truly married ones do not publicize the HEAVY WORK involved.
Before marrying, read books, go to conferences and ask questions... you will discover THERE IS NO HONEY WITHOUT MONEY.
Now let me give my 50cent solutions/ideas (asides what other great minds in this forum will offer)
1) Move out of that house... send her to stay with your parents for a while and then you can go manage with a friend. THEN SUBLET THE 3 BEDROOM(you will get enough money for a tank and more)
2) buy more drums
3) buy 25k POS and give her to start work........ so she will know how hard it is to make money and begin to appreciate you
4) learn how to drive, then offer UBER SERVICES to people who own cars... YOU WILL BE DRIVING FOR THEM AND PAYING THEM 25K OR 30K WEEKLY WHILE THE REST IS YOURS. (this is more better than the meagre salary you earn)
5) Learn how to use the computer well and learn skills like DATA ANOTATION, DATA ANALYSIS and I can help you with a REMOTE JOB.
6) LEARN WEB DESIGN and GRAPHICS and inform people of your skills by word of mouth and you will get jobs/contracts
7) GO TO GOOGLE and type cysed jobs you can apply if you are in the selected states and get a higher paying job with more recognition.
I hope this helps you bro... keep pushing... you will own houses one day. Stay Inspired.
You are typing nonsence, there's no worst advice on this forum that these ones you drafted out. To think that your opening statement seem intelligent, but u see those numbers from one to the last number are completely out of point. Learning how to drive, master it for commercial purpose when he doesn't have a personal car or predriving experience. Data coding learning and the likes will take nothing less than 3 years on the average. So how will a married man provide for his household all those years? You are even suggesting the wive moves to husband's parent house, SMH. 1 Like |
| Re: Help! My Marriage Is Giving Me Pain. by okeke6969: 12:27pm On Mar 04 |
AkporsMechanical:
I promise to be very brief.
My wife and I live in a three bedroom flat without paying rent, although we only occupy one room since we don't have much property yet. The owner of the house abandoned the house before now and when we had accomodation issue asked us to stay there. We have been here since last year. However, there is no Geepee tank to supply water into the house. We could only pump water into our little drum when there is light. So I always go fetch water from the neighbouring compounds whenever there is no light which have resulted into several insults. My wife has been dragging me that I must buy a Geepee tank.
My salary as a private school teacher is barely enough to feed us talk more of saving to buy a Geepee tank especially in this economic crisis. In the midst of all these, my wife's phone went bad and needed a new one Just this afternoon, my wife started raining insults on me that I am not behaving like a man at all, that I should have settled down fully before thinking of marriage, that I want to make her go hungry. This was because I told her I would cut off some part of my salary to be saving so I can buy curtain for our room, television and save for Geepee tank. She even went ahead to say I am poor and wretched just because I can't afford her a new phone for now.
Since afternoon, I have refused to eat. My problem here is that my parents love my wife and my parents are far from where I reside. And I don't want to report my wife to my parents so it won't bring disrespect later to her in the future. Secondly, as the first born of my parent,I don't know how my parents will take it if I tell them I don't want to marry her again so they don't have b.p. I am really really confused. The little extra money I get from extra tutorial is what I do send to my two siblings in school even though is very little compare to their needs but at least it is something.
I feel like running away but to where? I truly love my wife but she is regretting marrying me. Please what can I do? If you don't know what to do then run away. |
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| Re: Help! My Marriage Is Giving Me Pain. by AlphaHakimi: 12:29pm On Mar 04 |
OP
I will be truthful and blunt. You don't owe your wife luxury. It is absolutely wrong for her to call youba poor man for being unable to provide her WANTS. Every profession is important, if you are not a school teacher, who will you leave the job for. Even if you leave the job, are school teachers forbidden from getting married because they earn little salary.
You see, if your wife wants luxury (a new phone or Geepee tank or whatever) she should go out and work. Your income is little and then you have a wife who sits at home waiting and depending on only you to provide?? That's wrong.
The only person that deserves luxury is a person who works for it and not a person who depends on the worker. My advice to you is to treat her exactly how she treats you. If she feels she married a poor man, she should leave and join the queue of ladies waiting for a rich man.
Like I said, you owe no one any form of luxury. You are already providing to the best of your ability.
She either settles for what you can provide, or she leaves. If she leaves, atleast your standard of living will increase because you are married to a leech.
Shalom 2 Likes |
| Re: Help! My Marriage Is Giving Me Pain. by maclatunji: 12:29pm On Mar 04 |
AkporsMechanical:
I promise to be very brief.
My wife and I live in a three bedroom flat without paying rent, although we only occupy one room since we don't have much property yet. The owner of the house abandoned the house before now and when we had accomodation issue asked us to stay there. We have been here since last year. However, there is no Geepee tank to supply water into the house. We could only pump water into our little drum when there is light. So I always go fetch water from the neighbouring compounds whenever there is no light which have resulted into several insults. My wife has been dragging me that I must buy a Geepee tank.
My salary as a private school teacher is barely enough to feed us talk more of saving to buy a Geepee tank especially in this economic crisis. In the midst of all these, my wife's phone went bad and needed a new one Just this afternoon, my wife started raining insults on me that I am not behaving like a man at all, that I should have settled down fully before thinking of marriage, that I want to make her go hungry. This was because I told her I would cut off some part of my salary to be saving so I can buy curtain for our room, television and save for Geepee tank. She even went ahead to say I am poor and wretched just because I can't afford her a new phone for now.
Since afternoon, I have refused to eat. My problem here is that my parents love my wife and my parents are far from where I reside. And I don't want to report my wife to my parents so it won't bring disrespect later to her in the future. Secondly, as the first born of my parent,I don't know how my parents will take it if I tell them I don't want to marry her again so they don't have b.p. I am really really confused. The little extra money I get from extra tutorial is what I do send to my two siblings in school even though is very little compare to their needs but at least it is something.
I feel like running away but to where? I truly love my wife but she is regretting marrying me. Please what can I do? Do what you can and leave the rest. Report her to someone in her family she respects just for the record. I know if things get better for you financially, she is likely to change and that should not be the way things should go. However, this is life and we are not always promised a fair bargain. Focus on getting better and having more streams of income. |
| Re: Help! My Marriage Is Giving Me Pain. by LEGALSER: 12:30pm On Mar 04 |
AkporsMechanical:
I promise to be very brief.
My wife and I live in a three bedroom flat without paying rent, although we only occupy one room since we don't have much property yet. The owner of the house abandoned the house before now and when we had accomodation issue asked us to stay there. We have been here since last year. However, there is no Geepee tank to supply water into the house. We could only pump water into our little drum when there is light. So I always go fetch water from the neighbouring compounds whenever there is no light which have resulted into several insults. My wife has been dragging me that I must buy a Geepee tank.
My salary as a private school teacher is barely enough to feed us talk more of saving to buy a Geepee tank especially in this economic crisis. In the midst of all these, my wife's phone went bad and needed a new one Just this afternoon, my wife started raining insults on me that I am not behaving like a man at all, that I should have settled down fully before thinking of marriage, that I want to make her go hungry. This was because I told her I would cut off some part of my salary to be saving so I can buy curtain for our room, television and save for Geepee tank. She even went ahead to say I am poor and wretched just because I can't afford her a new phone for now.
Since afternoon, I have refused to eat. My problem here is that my parents love my wife and my parents are far from where I reside. And I don't want to report my wife to my parents so it won't bring disrespect later to her in the future. Secondly, as the first born of my parent,I don't know how my parents will take it if I tell them I don't want to marry her again so they don't have b.p. I am really really confused. The little extra money I get from extra tutorial is what I do send to my two siblings in school even though is very little compare to their needs but at least it is something.
I feel like running away but to where? I truly love my wife but she is regretting marrying me. Please what can I do? Another fool don create thread. Whenever I open threads like this, I always feel irritated, it seems some of you married people, married without your brains intact. |
| Re: Help! My Marriage Is Giving Me Pain. by Weknowbetter: 12:31pm On Mar 04 |
YOU DONT PAY RENT AND STILL CANT BUY A CURTAIN? YOU ARE VERY WRONG AND NOT MATURE. YOU TAKE CARE OF HOME FIRST STOP SENDI G MO EY HOME, THOSE SIBLINGS ARE NOT YOUR CHILDREN. GET YOUR WATER TANK AND ENCOURAGE YOUR WIFE TO WORK. |
| Re: Help! My Marriage Is Giving Me Pain. by Kenneth4u205(m): 12:31pm On Mar 04 |
Did you vote for TINUBU in the last election? popweezy:
I am actually in deep sorrow typing this. I never knew I could ever stoop so low to this. The only hope I rely on this week is shattered. I learned my lesson the hard way. I beg you guys with everything you cherish. Pls bless me with any amount. Hunger is about to finish me. I beg you in the name of God
1.2.2.3.1.1.4.9.5.8 access bank Lawal Abdulkadir . God bless you! |
| Re: Help! My Marriage Is Giving Me Pain. by oyebanji(m): 12:32pm On Mar 04 |
Apart from "tibitibi", what else is she brining to he table? AkporsMechanical:
I promise to be very brief.
My wife and I live in a three bedroom flat without paying rent, although we only occupy one room since we don't have much property yet. The owner of the house abandoned the house before now and when we had accomodation issue asked us to stay there. We have been here since last year. However, there is no Geepee tank to supply water into the house. We could only pump water into our little drum when there is light. So I always go fetch water from the neighbouring compounds whenever there is no light which have resulted into several insults. My wife has been dragging me that I must buy a Geepee tank.
My salary as a private school teacher is barely enough to feed us talk more of saving to buy a Geepee tank especially in this economic crisis. In the midst of all these, my wife's phone went bad and needed a new one Just this afternoon, my wife started raining insults on me that I am not behaving like a man at all, that I should have settled down fully before thinking of marriage, that I want to make her go hungry. This was because I told her I would cut off some part of my salary to be saving so I can buy curtain for our room, television and save for Geepee tank. She even went ahead to say I am poor and wretched just because I can't afford her a new phone for now.
Since afternoon, I have refused to eat. My problem here is that my parents love my wife and my parents are far from where I reside. And I don't want to report my wife to my parents so it won't bring disrespect later to her in the future. Secondly, as the first born of my parent,I don't know how my parents will take it if I tell them I don't want to marry her again so they don't have b.p. I am really really confused. The little extra money I get from extra tutorial is what I do send to my two siblings in school even though is very little compare to their needs but at least it is something.
I feel like running away but to where? I truly love my wife but she is regretting marrying me. Please what can I do? |
| Re: Help! My Marriage Is Giving Me Pain. by KillahPriest: 12:33pm On Mar 04 |
AkporsMechanical:
I promise to be very brief.
My wife and I live in a three bedroom flat without paying rent, although we only occupy one room since we don't have much property yet. The owner of the house abandoned the house before now and when we had accomodation issue asked us to stay there. We have been here since last year. However, there is no Geepee tank to supply water into the house. We could only pump water into our little drum when there is light. So I always go fetch water from the neighbouring compounds whenever there is no light which have resulted into several insults. My wife has been dragging me that I must buy a Geepee tank.
My salary as a private school teacher is barely enough to feed us talk more of saving to buy a Geepee tank especially in this economic crisis. In the midst of all these, my wife's phone went bad and needed a new one Just this afternoon, my wife started raining insults on me that I am not behaving like a man at all, that I should have settled down fully before thinking of marriage, that I want to make her go hungry. This was because I told her I would cut off some part of my salary to be saving so I can buy curtain for our room, television and save for Geepee tank. She even went ahead to say I am poor and wretched just because I can't afford her a new phone for now.
Since afternoon, I have refused to eat. My problem here is that my parents love my wife and my parents are far from where I reside. And I don't want to report my wife to my parents so it won't bring disrespect later to her in the future. Secondly, as the first born of my parent,I don't know how my parents will take it if I tell them I don't want to marry her again so they don't have b.p. I am really really confused. The little extra money I get from extra tutorial is what I do send to my two siblings in school even though is very little compare to their needs but at least it is something.
I feel like running away but to where? I truly love my wife but she is regretting marrying me. Please what can I do? women all over the world but especially Nigerian women have a talent for running their mouth like generator whenever they're hungry or think they're suffering so, if you run away from your wife now, how will you cope with the next woman you marry down the line ? Your solution is to solve the root cause of your problems which is obviously money. If you're a traditional man, I would have said that you should go home and appease the gods of your father's compound and beg them to open your way since we know those guys can be extremely angry when starved. Just try your best, the woman loves you but she's not diplomatic with her words 1 Like |
| Re: Help! My Marriage Is Giving Me Pain. by realgift: 12:39pm On Mar 04 |
muyico:
Wait?
she s not working?
seems like u married liability woman.
my wife bought her phone by herself. She dash me her 4ma phone. When she c i didnt fancy latest phone! U gat alot to do on her! U re not man enough. 4 ur wife to rainz insult on u. Despite my wife taking alot of responsibility at home. She nava once insult me b4!! God bless you for this comment, most guys need to grow up. Life is too short to allow woman put you under depression. If she thinks it is easy to provide,let her look for job and do so that she can also provide for the house in this harsh economy 1 Like |
| Re: Help! My Marriage Is Giving Me Pain. by TrustedLawyer: 12:40pm On Mar 04 |
GenderMix:
@OP
How can you get married without basic properties in a house not even a house you rented. You guys need to separate for sometime so you can get on your feet. Please don't risk it to get your wife pregnant. Use preventive measures during sex Can he gain an erection in the midst of this tribulation? Can he even mention that to a phoneless and Televisionless woman? Let him take the advice of the person that advised him to get a POS. It is far better than teaching. Marriage without money is bitter, in fact, very bitter. It can send a man to early grave. Nobody should get married if he doesn't have a reasonable income. |
| Re: Help! My Marriage Is Giving Me Pain. by saintneo(m): 12:42pm On Mar 04 |
Akpors, how often do you get light? If you get light daily, then I suggest you buy another drum. A drum is like 150litres to 175litres. If you fill these two drums daily, then you will not have issues. Just try to be smart in pumping water daily. Do not give yourself much tension. Focus more on solving your problem than worrying about the problem. I do not know if your believe in God, but I think you need God a a change. As per wifey, keep calm and handle things like a man. No fighting o! AkporsMechanical:
I promise to be very brief.
My wife and I live in a three bedroom flat without paying rent, although we only occupy one room since we don't have much property yet. The owner of the house abandoned the house before now and when we had accomodation issue asked us to stay there. We have been here since last year. However, there is no Geepee tank to supply water into the house. We could only pump water into our little drum when there is light. So I always go fetch water from the neighbouring compounds whenever there is no light which have resulted into several insults. My wife has been dragging me that I must buy a Geepee tank.
My salary as a private school teacher is barely enough to feed us talk more of saving to buy a Geepee tank especially in this economic crisis. In the midst of all these, my wife's phone went bad and needed a new one Just this afternoon, my wife started raining insults on me that I am not behaving like a man at all, that I should have settled down fully before thinking of marriage, that I want to make her go hungry. This was because I told her I would cut off some part of my salary to be saving so I can buy curtain for our room, television and save for Geepee tank. She even went ahead to say I am poor and wretched just because I can't afford her a new phone for now.
Since afternoon, I have refused to eat. My problem here is that my parents love my wife and my parents are far from where I reside. And I don't want to report my wife to my parents so it won't bring disrespect later to her in the future. Secondly, as the first born of my parent,I don't know how my parents will take it if I tell them I don't want to marry her again so they don't have b.p. I am really really confused. The little extra money I get from extra tutorial is what I do send to my two siblings in school even though is very little compare to their needs but at least it is something.
I feel like running away but to where? I truly love my wife but she is regretting marrying me. Please what can I do? |
| Re: Help! My Marriage Is Giving Me Pain. by popweezy(m): 12:42pm On Mar 04 |
Kenneth4u205:
Did you vote for TINUBU in the last election? not at all.. I was at the hospital on the day of election |
| Re: Help! My Marriage Is Giving Me Pain. by Dyfynezz12(m): 12:43pm On Mar 04 |
Eddie2024:
why should he if I may ask? is that what he signed up for? Marriage is meant to be enjoyed not endured, if it was the other way round now, the whole world would have heard about it, men too deserves love and respect, even though I no dey pity them at times, cause na wetin fit some of them bedat.. What is bringing the insult is finance,if he didn't have enough he should av avoided the insult by not marrying her or look for someonelse that is working |
| Re: Help! My Marriage Is Giving Me Pain. by capricornlady: 12:43pm On Mar 04 |
muyico:
Wait?
she s not working?
seems like u married liability woman.
my wife bought her phone by herself. She dash me her 4ma phone. When she c i didnt fancy latest phone! U gat alot to do on her! U re not man enough. 4 ur wife to rainz insult on u. Despite my wife taking alot of responsibility at home. She nava once insult me b4!! so you're happy your wife is taking up a lot of responsibility while you lazy around, a man is supposed to be a provider and breadwinner of a home, while the wife is a support system. No difference between you and the OP. 1 Like |
| Re: Help! My Marriage Is Giving Me Pain. by junketer(m): 12:45pm On Mar 04 |
I hate it when men behave like sisis. Marriage is not life or death. That's what i keep telling my friend that receives insults from his wife daily. End the marriage and remarry. Let's see who go marry her. My exwife is still unmarried after over 4 years that i ended the marriage but me i am over two years in another marriage and thank God she's right for me.
Keep being a sisi, one day you go get BP or beat her to death. Nonsense. 7 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: Help! My Marriage Is Giving Me Pain. by rilChilz: 12:46pm On Mar 04 |
My brother... Dont ever compare your home with another persons home, all those people saying you are not man enough also have their own problems even if it might be different... Remember that nothing on this earth is worth your life, if you allow your wife to push you to an early grave wont make her respect your corpse any better... Take life one day at a time 1 Like |
| Re: Help! My Marriage Is Giving Me Pain. by omolola12345(m): 12:47pm On Mar 04 |
No one even cares to ask the man for his level of education and qualifications. If there is a way someone can assist him. I believe it's not all of us for this Nairaland that is not capable. I have the mind to always assist people if I have the capacity. You think it's the happiness of the man to be working in private school if it's not Nigeria that is happening to the man. I pray and I am believing God for the couples that God will send helper to them and both parties will get good jobs that will sustain their home. |
| Re: Help! My Marriage Is Giving Me Pain. by Peters1212(m): 12:48pm On Mar 04 |
Oga get a loan/grant from ur friends or ur relatives n give it to ur wife to do business since she is not working while u start looking for smting else to do... Do this fast before ur wife start looking outside. |
| Re: Help! My Marriage Is Giving Me Pain. by Viking007(m): 12:50pm On Mar 04 |
AkporsMechanical:
I promise to be very brief.
My wife and I live in a three bedroom flat without paying rent, although we only occupy one room since we don't have much property yet. The owner of the house abandoned the house before now and when we had accomodation issue asked us to stay there. We have been here since last year. However, there is no Geepee tank to supply water into the house. We could only pump water into our little drum when there is light. So I always go fetch water from the neighbouring compounds whenever there is no light which have resulted into several insults. My wife has been dragging me that I must buy a Geepee tank.
My salary as a private school teacher is barely enough to feed us talk more of saving to buy a Geepee tank especially in this economic crisis. In the midst of all these, my wife's phone went bad and needed a new one Just this afternoon, my wife started raining insults on me that I am not behaving like a man at all, that I should have settled down fully before thinking of marriage, that I want to make her go hungry. This was because I told her I would cut off some part of my salary to be saving so I can buy curtain for our room, television and save for Geepee tank. She even went ahead to say I am poor and wretched just because I can't afford her a new phone for now.
Since afternoon, I have refused to eat. My problem here is that my parents love my wife and my parents are far from where I reside. And I don't want to report my wife to my parents so it won't bring disrespect later to her in the future. Secondly, as the first born of my parent,I don't know how my parents will take it if I tell them I don't want to marry her again so they don't have b.p. I am really really confused. The little extra money I get from extra tutorial is what I do send to my two siblings in school even though is very little compare to their needs but at least it is something.
I feel like running away but to where? I truly love my wife but she is regretting marrying me. Please what can I do? If getting a tank will save your marriage because that’s all I can see from your write up. Get the cost of the tank and send me a dm. ✌️ 4 Likes |
| Re: Help! My Marriage Is Giving Me Pain. by LandMann: 12:56pm On Mar 04 |
AkporsMechanical:
I promise to be very brief.
My wife and I live in a three bedroom flat without paying rent, although we only occupy one room since we don't have much property yet. The owner of the house abandoned the house before now and when we had accomodation issue asked us to stay there. We have been here since last year. However, there is no Geepee tank to supply water into the house. We could only pump water into our little drum when there is light. So I always go fetch water from the neighbouring compounds whenever there is no light which have resulted into several insults. My wife has been dragging me that I must buy a Geepee tank.
My salary as a private school teacher is barely enough to feed us talk more of saving to buy a Geepee tank especially in this economic crisis. In the midst of all these, my wife's phone went bad and needed a new one Just this afternoon, my wife started raining insults on me that I am not behaving like a man at all, that I should have settled down fully before thinking of marriage, that I want to make her go hungry. This was because I told her I would cut off some part of my salary to be saving so I can buy curtain for our room, television and save for Geepee tank. She even went ahead to say I am poor and wretched just because I can't afford her a new phone for now.
Since afternoon, I have refused to eat. My problem here is that my parents love my wife and my parents are far from where I reside. And I don't want to report my wife to my parents so it won't bring disrespect later to her in the future. Secondly, as the first born of my parent,I don't know how my parents will take it if I tell them I don't want to marry her again so they don't have b.p. I am really really confused. The little extra money I get from extra tutorial is what I do send to my two siblings in school even though is very little compare to their needs but at least it is something.
I feel like running away but to where? I truly love my wife but she is regretting marrying me. Please what can I do? You're not yet able to stand on your feet but you see money to be sending to your siblings while your home suffers. You shouldn't have gotten married if you are not read for the responsibilities that comes with being married. As a man, you're 90% responsible for providing for your home. Failure to do this will cause disharmony in your home. Try and diversify your earnings. Look into other sources of teaching to earn good money, not the miserable salary that schools pay in Nigeria. If you are really good at teaching, and especially if it is a STEM subject, just brush up your skills online then do a TEFL free course online and start looking for opportunities to teach foreigners English online to earn dollars. From there you can hustle to leave Nigeria and travel to China or Vietnam to teach. You'll make better money compared to what you're earning now. I know the demon that has been holding you back for ages will jump into your mind now and start magnifying the obstacles that will prevent you from achieving the above goal... Well, you can listen to those demons if you want to remain poor forever. But if you don't want to remain poor, then start taking practical steps to better your life. Stop sending money to your siblings for now. Let them go and hustle for themselves. Save aggressively to buy laptop if you don't have one. Go and do labourer work for those builders. You're sure of 5k-9k for a day job if you're not lazy. With the savings, buy a fairly good laptop and buy data and start your second phase. There are free TEFL courses online. Dedicate three months and take the course and make sure you learn it well. If you even need to switch to teaching English as a subject in your school then do so. Gradually you'll complete the course and then you can start looking for teaching opportunities online in China and Vietnam. Alternatively, save some money, quit your teaching job and go learn a valuable handwork. I repeat, you'll end up in poverty if you continue as a teacher in Nigeria for the next ten years of your life. Think about it and let it sink into your brain. Your wife's pressure is what has pushed you to look for solution. Don't blame her. It's how nature designed life. If nobody pushes or put pressure on you, you won't leave your comfort zone. You'll still be sending money to others while earning a miserable salary that can't afford anything given the massive inflation in the country. Use Google if you have any questions. Take action now 2 Likes |
| Re: Help! My Marriage Is Giving Me Pain. by Maysdevices(f): 12:59pm On Mar 04 |
AkporsMechanical:
I promise to be very brief.
My wife and I live in a three bedroom flat without paying rent, although we only occupy one room since we don't have much property yet. The owner of the house abandoned the house before now and when we had accomodation issue asked us to stay there. We have been here since last year. However, there is no Geepee tank to supply water into the house. We could only pump water into our little drum when there is light. So I always go fetch water from the neighbouring compounds whenever there is no light which have resulted into several insults. My wife has been dragging me that I must buy a Geepee tank.
My salary as a private school teacher is barely enough to feed us talk more of saving to buy a Geepee tank especially in this economic crisis. In the midst of all these, my wife's phone went bad and needed a new one Just this afternoon, my wife started raining insults on me that I am not behaving like a man at all, that I should have settled down fully before thinking of marriage, that I want to make her go hungry. This was because I told her I would cut off some part of my salary to be saving so I can buy curtain for our room, television and save for Geepee tank. She even went ahead to say I am poor and wretched just because I can't afford her a new phone for now.
Since afternoon, I have refused to eat. My problem here is that my parents love my wife and my parents are far from where I reside. And I don't want to report my wife to my parents so it won't bring disrespect later to her in the future. Secondly, as the first born of my parent,I don't know how my parents will take it if I tell them I don't want to marry her again so they don't have b.p. I am really really confused. The little extra money I get from extra tutorial is what I do send to my two siblings in school even though is very little compare to their needs but at least it is something.
I feel like running away but to where? I truly love my wife but she is regretting marrying me. Please what can I do? I’M A WOMAN I WILL TELL YOU FOR FREE THAT YOU ARE A SIMP!!!!!! You fetch water for her too? What a fucking pity. Why do your parents love her? Abeg don’t make me angry which one is you truly love your wife? What do you want us to do now apart from tell you to dump for a while let her learn money doesn’t fall from the skies  ? You want us to contribute money for Geepee tank or what? Mr ‘I truly love my wife’ that calls him wretched and poor for because of ordinary phone GO AND SLEEP SIMP This story made me so angry if I were a guy, I fit track you woze you 😡 3 Likes |
| Re: Help! My Marriage Is Giving Me Pain. by Maysdevices(f): 1:00pm On Mar 04 |
Viking007:
If getting a tank will save your marriage because that’s all I can see from your write up. Get the cost of the tank and send me a dm. ✌️ This exactly what he wants. Tomorrow when his wife calls him poor and wretched for not having any furniture in the house, Una go still contribute for am to furnish Simp ass man fetching water for an ungrateful abusive thing 2 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: Help! My Marriage Is Giving Me Pain. by nedekid: 1:02pm On Mar 04 |
blackpanthar:
I commend your courage sir, to remain with that woman, talk more of being faithful or patient is really a herculean task.
Now to the main matter...
YOU WERE ACTUALLY POOR....(Passing Over Opportunities Repeatedly) in your past but this year EVERYTHING WILL TURN UP FOR YOU.
Do not blame her sir, blame yourself for not understanding the COMMITMENT DEMANDS of marriage before jumping into it.
I wouldn't want to go deep into how this our generation has EXALTED MARRIAGE beyond limits.... it feels like singleness is a disease yet the truly married ones do not publicize the HEAVY WORK involved.
Before marrying, read books, go to conferences and ask questions... you will discover THERE IS NO HONEY WITHOUT MONEY.
Now let me give my 50cent solutions/ideas (asides what other great minds in this forum will offer)
1) Move out of that house... send her to stay with your parents for a while and then you can go manage with a friend. THEN SUBLET THE 3 BEDROOM(you will get enough money for a tank and more)
2) buy more drums
3) buy 25k POS and give her to start work........ so she will know how hard it is to make money and begin to appreciate you
4) learn how to drive, then offer UBER SERVICES to people who own cars... YOU WILL BE DRIVING FOR THEM AND PAYING THEM 25K OR 30K WEEKLY WHILE THE REST IS YOURS. (this is more better than the meagre salary you earn)
5) Learn how to use the computer well and learn skills like DATA ANOTATION, DATA ANALYSIS and I can help you with a REMOTE JOB.
6) LEARN WEB DESIGN and GRAPHICS and inform people of your skills by word of mouth and you will get jobs/contracts
7) GO TO GOOGLE and type cysed jobs you can apply if you are in the selected states and get a higher paying job with more recognition.
I hope this helps you bro... keep pushing... you will own houses one day. Stay Inspired.
See "advice".. Nothing persin no go see for this nairaland.  2 Likes |
| Re: Help! My Marriage Is Giving Me Pain. by Banbanna(m): 1:03pm On Mar 04 |
Seems you don't know that most of us seriously pay mind to what people would say about one's failed short-lived marriage and couldn't imagine bearing the shame that'll come with it. He even said his parents are very fond of his wife. So he's going to feel like a failure going back his father's house. That guy rushed into marriage too quickly. Acidosis:
Your marriage is giving you pain? The fact that you got married with no single property (not even curtains) is not giving you pain??
What were you trying to build? The basic thing for a marriage is an apartment and you never had one in your name.
Two available options here:
1. You guys need to separate for a while. You're clearly not ready for marriage. You're not even qualified to be a "bachelor" yet. You're still in your early phase, so if I were you, I will return to my parents home and build my savings. I'm not posting this to hurt your feelings. But that's the truth; a truth I would personally embrace.
2. Hang on and continue hoping for a breakthrough. This is the version you'll most likely hear across different religious setting, but have it in mind that 90% of the people who relied on hope ended up with generational poverty. Like the US lottery, nothing is guaranteed. |
| Re: Help! My Marriage Is Giving Me Pain. by junketer(m): 1:05pm On Mar 04 |
Maysdevices:
This exactly what he wants. Tomorrow when his wife calls him poor and wretched for not having any furniture in the house, Una go still contribute for am to furnish
Simp ass man fetching water for an ungrateful abusive thing you make sense. That guy is a simp. The wife sef go add the gp tank for the insult say na people dey buy tank for am. Why can't men be men? 1 Like |
| Re: Help! My Marriage Is Giving Me Pain. by HOD1974: 1:07pm On Mar 04 |
Am a graduate in Physics Education ABU Zaria, with NCE Physics/Chemistry. I teach for over 22 years in private school before realizing the need to develop my talent in electronics repairs which was what I use in sponsoring myself in school. Mean while my wife is a civil servant and I deliberately instruct her " if money comes I support, if it's not available you support". If not everyone should stay in peace by staying apart marriage is not by force. That's if you love yourself. A living dog is better than a dead lion. Asp. 1 Like |
| Re: Help! My Marriage Is Giving Me Pain. by Eddie2024: 1:14pm On Mar 04 |
Dyfynezz12:
What is bringing the insult is finance,if he didn't have enough he should av avoided the insult by not marrying her or look for someonelse that is working you can't know the true character of a person until you live with them under the same roof |
| Re: Help! My Marriage Is Giving Me Pain. by IamAtAnger: 1:21pm On Mar 04 |
So if u dey give this kind advice... na who go dey teach ur children for school?... sometimes it baffles me how people reason... fine he cud look for how to earn passive income not you tell him to juz quit his job as a teacher that's modern slavery AllahOfBlood:
to be sincere with you, you are sounding less of man.
find your wife something to do.
change ur job or look for a little business and start. private teaching job is the modern day slavery and you cant make anything out of it if you continue it that way.
stop talking about divorce at this time or calling ur parents. its true ur wife loves you and want u to sit up |
| Re: Help! My Marriage Is Giving Me Pain. by Dyfynezz12(m): 1:21pm On Mar 04 |
Eddie2024:
you can't know the true character of a person until you live with them under the same roof Sapa brings out the worst in humans esp women, if u dnt have money for the basic stay away from them. Ordinary girlfriend self dey show broke guy shege let alone wifey |
