Hello people.
I'm in my early twenties in a tertiary institution. I am this gentle guy that is mostly quiet.
I noticed that there are many financially okay guys as young as I am that are doing well unlike me. Now, I'm talking about the ones hustling legitimately.

I also want to be okay financially, but they tend to share information only with those they are close to.
There were updates about Arbitraging, Web 3 airdrop and testnet stuff that I only got to hear when it was too late.
I talk to these guys, roll with them, but they never see me as close enough to carry me along.

Even for those freelancing, they know techniques to get orders fast and constantly but will not share with me. One said I should bring 250k when I'm ready to start freelancing. I don't even have 50k in my name.
Whenever I tell them to "show me way" knowing they do legit stuffs, they tell me they too are looking for way.

Growing up, I was restricted so I suck at making friends and socializing. I have been trying to get better since I left secondary school but my social skills barely improved.

I researched online on my own to get updates but many were scam, overpriced classes/courses e.t.c. Though I have picked up a skill to learn but before I get good and start earning, I'll need sustenance.

Is it too late to improve my social skills in my early twenties? If no, how?
How can I move from just acquaintances to a friend that can be carried along in important things?

Never too late

who you are and how you move around is irrelevant to the issue at hand, you need to associate with people who dont see you as a threat to them.... you also have to understand that you need to focus on living life the right way and build a strong foundation and work hard for whatever you desire. looking at what others have as a benchmark to your own life, would always end in failure. you are not them and they are not you. stay in your lane and go about your own business/speed.

if you dont have 250k, then WORK HARD then save small small and when you have 250k, let that person teach you. dont try to cut corners, dont try to fake/lie your way through life. so get a JOB; any job so that you can cater for your immediate needs, then when you have a JOB, you can seek to better that situation... but until then, you are just wasting your life away seeking for the big prize when you cant even fix your own self.

MrBrownJay1:
who you are and how you move around is irrelevant to the issue at hand, you need to associate with people who dont see you as a threat to them.... you also have to understand that you need to focus on living life the right way and build a strong foundation and work hard for whatever you desire. looking at what others have as a benchmark to your own life, would always end in failure. you are not them and they are not you. stay in your lane and go about your own business/speed.

if you dont have 250k, then WORK HARD then save small small and when you have 250k, let that person teach you. dont try to cut corners, dont try to fake/lie your way through life. so get a JOB; any job so that you can cater for your immediate needs, then when you have a JOB, you can seek to better that situation... but until them, you are just wasting your life away seeking for the big prize when you cant even fix your own self.

You have a point but it's not as easy as said.
As a student, getting a job means earning about 10k per month at the expense of my studies.

If others can get opportunities just because they are close with someone, I don't think wanting to be close to someone because of opportunities is a bad idea.

I appreciate your input

Drella:


You have a point but it's not as easy as said.
As a student, getting a job means earning about 10k per month at the expense of my studies.

If others can get opportunities just because they are close with someone, I don't think wanting to be close to someone because of opportunities is a bad idea.

I appreciate your input

Most times, you have to be valuable to someone to get value in return. Except you're his close Gee from his broke days or family, a rich/financially comfortable guy would hardly see any point relating with you or even worse taking his time to mentor you. He will always ask himself: Why? What is in for me to spend my time (and possibly resources) teaching this stranger?

My advice for you is don't envy these successful guys nor feel bad whenever you get aired by them. Everyone is out to avoid added liabilities while improving their current financial/societal standings to a higher level. First work hard on yourself to become more social. Try relating with normal average guys around you. Learn to build solid and genuine friendships with like-minded people (in form of true brotherhood). If you're not interested in learning how to build genuine friendship first, then you will always come off as just another selfish guy trying to leech off other people's success. Or better still, learn to navigate your life as a lone wolf which is the harder route but the best for a hardened introvert.

pansophist:


A sweeter way of saying ''Iron sharpen iron''. Good advice

Even if the poster knows it or not, he too avoids liabilities like a plague. It's a natural human response that is done subconsciously. Humans by nature are merchants behaviorally, that is, ''trade-by-barter'' is the fundamental coding that underpins human relationships.

The bolded is a basic truth most people don't like to accept. Everyone avoids liabilities. Affection, Pity, and gratitude (for past deeds) are the reasons people accept liabilities of their long-term friends, family, and loved ones. Even in sexual relationships where one partner is a liability to the other, we can still say there is an exchange of value: liabilities for love emotional balderdash and sex. Apart from these scenarios, it will be difficult for someone to see an obvious liability and accept it wholeheartedly into his/her life. The only exceptions are overly generous people and they are one in a million!

Lacking in inter personal skills

USAfall2024:


Most times, you have to be valuable to someone to get value in return. Except you're his close Gee from his broke days or family, a rich or financially comfortable guy would hardly see any point relating with you or even worse taking his time to teach you things. He will always ask himself: Why? What is in for me to spend my time (and possibly resources) teaching this stranger?

My advice for you is don't envy these successful guys nor feel bad whenever you get aired by them. Everyone is out to avoid added liabilities and improve their current standings to a higher level. Rather, work hard on yourself first to become more social. Try relating with normal average guys around you. Learn to build solid and genuine friendships with like-minded people (in form of true brotherhood). If you're not interested in learning how to build genuine friendship first, then you will always come off as just another selfish guy trying to leech off other people's success. Or better still, learn to navigate your life as a lone wolf which is the harder route but the best for a hardened introvert.

The first sentence says it all. That is the foundation to succeed in life.

Nobody is going to give you 'updates ' for free, humans will always want to associate with someone who brings something to the table.

Relax and don't put yourself under pressure, focus on your academics. Most of the successful people in school those days don't end up successful many years later.

Life isn't easy, less than 10% of the world's population will ever be successful in every given generation. Relax and focus on what's important to you now- your education.

Damnnn niggar

I understand how the op feels


Op you need to belong

You are just trying to be their friend

But you never belong to them

The street is cold bro.....

The update wey you dey find from dem so,if dem show you,you sure say your mind go dey?

Even if you Double your age, You're still not too late

Lol this world is a confused place....


If someone die at 30 dem go say too young to die or gone too soon buh if person Neva mak am at 30 he don late for him....



We go all dey alright....

no let person lure you into yahoo o

I don't know how to advise Gen Zs because they always have their minds made up on what they want to do. So I'll simply say, whatever you do, don't soil your hands.

Ok

Drella:
Hello people.
I'm in my early twenties in a tertiary institution. I am this gentle guy that is mostly quiet.
I noticed that there are many financially okay guys as young as I am that are doing well unlike me. Now, I'm talking about the ones hustling legitimately.

I also want to be okay financially, but they tend to share information only with those they are close to.
There were updates about Arbitraging, Web 3 airdrop and testnet stuff that I only got to hear when it was too late.
I talk to these guys, roll with them, but they never see me as close enough to carry me along.

Even for those freelancing, they know techniques to get orders fast and constantly but will not share with me. One said I should bring 250k when I'm ready to start freelancing. I don't even have 50k in my name.
Whenever I tell them to "show me way" knowing they do legit stuffs, they tell me they too are looking for way.

Growing up, I was restricted so I suck at making friends and socializing. I have been trying to get better since I left secondary school but my social skills barely improved.

I researched online on my own to get updates but many were scam, overpriced classes/courses e.t.c. Though I have picked up a skill to learn but before I get good and start earning, I'll need sustenance.

Is it too late to improve my social skills in my early twenties? If no, how?
How can I move from just acquaintances to a friend that can be carried along in important things?

live your life

You will find answers here , just wait a little

Drella:
Hello people.
I'm in my early twenties in a tertiary institution. I am this gentle guy that is mostly quiet.
I noticed that there are many financially okay guys as young as I am that are doing well unlike me. Now, I'm talking about the ones hustling legitimately.

I also want to be okay financially, but they tend to share information only with those they are close to.
There were updates about Arbitraging, Web 3 airdrop and testnet stuff that I only got to hear when it was too late.
I talk to these guys, roll with them, but they never see me as close enough to carry me along.

Even for those freelancing, they know techniques to get orders fast and constantly but will not share with me. One said I should bring 250k when I'm ready to start freelancing. I don't even have 50k in my name.
Whenever I tell them to "show me way" knowing they do legit stuffs, they tell me they too are looking for way.

Growing up, I was restricted so I suck at making friends and socializing. I have been trying to get better since I left secondary school but my social skills barely improved.

I researched online on my own to get updates but many were scam, overpriced classes/courses e.t.c. Though I have picked up a skill to learn but before I get good and start earning, I'll need sustenance.

Is it too late to improve my social skills in my early twenties? If no, how?
How can I move from just acquaintances to a friend that can be carried along in important things?

Suppose those guys way poor
They will not hide update for you
Please first ur studies now
School is not end of life
After sch we go know the real champion most of those guys are into fraud that's just the truth
Abi sporty bet sef

See, you need to be genuinely interested in making friends with people. I'm not saying you have to force it or be desperate. No.

Look around you and see those with less resistance and just show u care in actions. Don't overdo it. Be consistent.

Then for now, focus and develop what you think you know how do. It could be your academics...get good results or any valuable hobby- be a star there. This aura will be around you as you are known for something.

So, collaborating with others who are getting it, won't be an issue and they won't see you as a major stress.

Also ensure you are not being wrongly influenced.

I feel the sincerity in your words. I am also a student struggling with this sa
Me thoughts at times.

Time to work is what I don't have because of my studies. I once took a bar work that promised to pay me 20k. But i ended up recieving 15k. The experience was not good at all. Time wasted, lectures missed, because I was asked to resume by 4pm. Lectures between 3:30 to 6pm was cut off.
I am currently looking for new job. But I can work with my phone. I really need a tech skill to fetch me the least to support my education. Guys are hiding updates these days.

It’s not too late chief

I was once like you and still like you when it comes to being socially isolated due to being an introvert. Then I gained admission into UNIBEN and stumbled on one quote by a philosopher when I was taking a philosophy GST course.

"A man who doesn't need people but survive alone in isolation is either a god or a beast."

That quote struck me deeply, I began to engage more with people but it was still hard to break into their circle to feel among for them to share relevant information with you, you must atleast do things with them, party with them, engage with them in their lifestyle etc. I just couldn't do it but I figured it was easy to get along with guys I knew back home whom I met in UNIBEN at the time so one of them began teaching me stuff; he would see this post of mine and begin to smile because he is on Nairaland and I know he reads my comment.

It was that singular guy who showed me some money making techniques till we both graduated and one IMPORTANT thing I realized is that: if one person accepts you, you will be an automatic mutual friend to his friends provided you interact with his friends when they come around.

That's how you grow your social network.


Secondly, you have nairaland — Nairaland played a huge role in my success in life today. Begin surfing random thread of your interests and realize Nairaland is a gold mine when comes to information.


Thirdly, YouTube — After I went back to my reclusive lifestyle of no friends, YouTube , Twitter (X) and Nairaland has been keeping me going when it comes to Updates.

You only need the topic or trend of the update on any ones mouth but go on YouTube, Nairaland and X and dig deeper.

My friend, the only friend you need is YouTube.com. This same friend taught me the skill with which I made $110 yesterday alone.

Up till today, I've not seen any person physically, doing the same skill except for online.

You will keep wasting your precious time following friends around. And at the end, they will introduce you to fraud and illegitimate means.

I used to buy courses on udemy and other course website until I discover that free course on YouTube are better.

Apart from the above, with YouTube, I've develop the confidence and skill of a software Engineer.

Also, if you know how to use the telegram app, you're on top of the world.

Bb

Next news please

Drella:


You have a point but it's not as easy as said.
As a student, getting a job means earning about 10k per month at the expense of my studies.

If others can get opportunities just because they are close with someone, I don't think wanting to be close to someone because of opportunities is a bad idea.

I appreciate your input

All that glitters is not gold
Those guys maybe hoarding info from u because they perceive u are too decent to engage in the kind of stuff they are doing. You don't really know what they are doing inside to make money. Secondly people hardly disclose their source of weath, no one easily teach others how to make money. So don't try to change yourself to be a bad person to be able to associate with them. When u meet a good person, he will teach u his trade.

Drella:
Hello people.
I'm in my early twenties in a tertiary institution. I am this gentle guy that is mostly quiet.
I noticed that there are many financially okay guys as young as I am that are doing well unlike me. Now, I'm talking about the ones hustling legitimately.

I also want to be okay financially, but they tend to share information only with those they are close to.
There were updates about Arbitraging, Web 3 airdrop and testnet stuff that I only got to hear when it was too late.
I talk to these guys, roll with them, but they never see me as close enough to carry me along.

Even for those freelancing, they know techniques to get orders fast and constantly but will not share with me. One said I should bring 250k when I'm ready to start freelancing. I don't even have 50k in my name.
Whenever I tell them to "show me way" knowing they do legit stuffs, they tell me they too are looking for way.

Growing up, I was restricted so I suck at making friends and socializing. I have been trying to get better since I left secondary school but my social skills barely improved.

I researched online on my own to get updates but many were scam, overpriced classes/courses e.t.c. Though I have picked up a skill to learn but before I get good and start earning, I'll need sustenance.

Is it too late to improve my social skills in my early twenties? If no, how?
How can I move from just acquaintances to a friend that can be carried along in important things?

If you can listen and harken DILIGENTLY to God and follow his tenets, my dear the sky would be your limit especially at this age ..

This may be a very unpopular recommendation in this instance , but God's grace is definitely the ultimate. Hustle pure and let God's guiding principles be your watch word.

All the best !