djon78:



Marrying someone that had single mother or someone from a dysfunctional home goes same way

There's always a problem

People from a well raised home carry the traits of there background
And are less likely to raise a dysfunctional or broken home themselves

I have seen these many times without number
The attributes always shows

Except individuals that intentionally work on history not repeating itself

A leopard cannot change its spot

This ain't rocket science
But I m surprised you call yourself a psychologist or whatever

I am sure it's a woman who wrote the original piece. The writing is very defensive and goes against established facts about single mother raised children.
They spend time scandalizing their ex husbands to the children creating hatred and resentment.
All the bad boys who nearly led me and other young boys astray in our youths where all products of single mothers. They generally lacked discipline and flouted every rule in the book.
We used to admire their freedom and bravado.
Many of them ended up going into fraud and scam, becoming cultists and generally going against any form of responsible authority after school.
They got arrested from time to time and till date their lives are very mediocre and lackluster.
We where lucky for the discipline and structure imposed by our dads whenever we attempted to stray with them.

That's ya business, sought it out.

That no concern me..

This is my concern now.
Power supply in Sagamu, Ikenne, Ogun State and other environs has turn to toy,... Off and On every 30mins. As I type this , they just turn it OFF.

1 day ON, 3 solid days OFF. The one day one na toy. Off and on... Naija which way?

PrayWills:
Our court wedding was supposed to be on Friday. I caught her telling a married man I love you and calling each other all sweet names. I confronted her and she said she was telling of proving to me she was faithful that I should draw whatever conclusions I wanted to.

I went to work on Monday and came back and told her I wanted to pause the weeding until we could sort our issues and she said we should call it off totally.

As we speak she has moved back to her mom’s house with the two kids, what do I do?

PS: she was raised by a single mom

I totally condemn her action, she was wrong. That's a clear sign of unfaithfulness in marriage.


You made claims that she has two kids for you already. My questions are;

1. Have you paid her bride price? If yes, when?

2. Have you completed her traditional marriage rites?

If you have not done the above, you are as guilty as her and deserve it.

Wawelexy:
Rejoice for what the lord has done... You just escaped! Rejoice bro.

Allow her go with the kids, let this current economic situation reset her brain, but make sure you are doing your quota has regards to the kids upkeep. If she comes back for reunion, please don't take her back. If you do, premium tears awaits you.


I don't know why a part of my mind is telling me that your name is Oluwasimpleton, and that you will take her back when she comes begging.

Why do you think she will come back begging?
You told someone to put wedding in hold, she said rather, the wedding should be canceled. Does that look like someone that will come back to beg?

PrayWills:
Our court wedding was supposed to be on Friday. I caught her telling a married man I love you and calling each other all sweet names. I confronted her and she said she was telling of proving to me she was faithful that I should draw whatever conclusions I wanted to.

I went to work on Monday and came back and told her I wanted to pause the weeding until we could sort our issues and she said we should call it off totally.

As we speak she has moved back to her mom’s house with the two kids, what do I do?

PS: [b]she was raised by a single mom[/b]

That could be the reason.

PrayWills:



Sabi Man.

I was trying to be a good man and father and made life too easy for her.


Thank you for your words, e touch me for the right place.

I can bet my balls that those 2 kids ain't yoirs. They belong to the married man.

habakukjss3:


I totally condemn her action, she was wrong. That's a clear sign of unfaithfulness in marriage.


You made claims that she has two kids for you already. My questions are;

1. Have you paid her bride price? If yes, when?

2. Have you completed her traditional marriage rites?

If you have not done the above, you are as guilty as her and deserve it.

Please ignore this one. Her brain is leaking. Don't look for any sense in her statement. It's a waste of time you won't see it.
Don't even argue with her.

Hmm. Well, hopefully the kids won’t be yours so you can just forget about her.

VTJN:
interesting

So you guys have been cohabiting for years with 2 kids? Like seriously? You probably took advantage of her because her father is either late or not together with her mum. And all of a sudden she's no longer a good woman? Your supposed wife to be left the house with the kids and you didn't deem it fit to visit her family to inform them what is happening? You came to nairaland to seek opinion and gladly someone who probably don't know what marriage is was telling you not to accept her back again like seriously? I can also add more fuel to what those guys told you. Do you know what? I'm a bloody single guy with no intention of getting married any time soon. The same me will come to nairaland and advice a supposed married man or a married man to be. I'd make sure i scatter their union. Isn't that what they're doing right now? End it as they say and probably they'd give you one of their sisters to continue from where you stopped

Sadly. they can't give you their sister because they've seen clearly the red flag in you. Cohabiting with someone's child to the extent of producing 2 kids. They can't give you their sister or daughter obviously but they can push you to end your supposed marriage to be and go out looking for your next victim or probably remain single like them.

If that lady was their sister or daughter. Trust me, you'd hear a different thing entirely from them. You'll be seriously lashed and whitewashed. Unfortunately, it's not their sister or daughter so they care less about her.

Btw, how i want my sister or daughter to be to be treaded same way I'd treat ANY lady known or unknown to me.

All the best

how you ignored where op mentioned she's a cheat without remorse is baffling.

PrayWills:
Our court wedding was supposed to be on Friday. I caught her telling a married man I love you and calling each other all sweet names. I confronted her and she said she was telling of proving to me she was faithful that I should draw whatever conclusions I wanted to.

I went to work on Monday and came back and told her I wanted to pause the weeding until we could sort our issues and she said we should call it off totally.

As we speak she has moved back to her mom’s house with the two kids, what do I do?

PS: she was raised by a single mom

First of all are the two kids yours, if yes let her go with the kids but be monitoring them.
A Lise woman is a lawyer a lose woman.
She was not properly brought up she must have grown up seeing and hearing all sorts of lies about independence from her mum and she feels she can be independent by being unfaithful.

My brother thank God for revealing and helping you out in time.

Wawelexy:
Rejoice for what the lord has done... You just escaped! Rejoice bro.

Allow her go with the kids, let this current economic situation reset her brain, but make sure you are doing your quota has regards to the kids upkeep. If she comes back for reunion, please don't take her back. If you do, premium tears awaits you.


I don't know why a part of my mind is telling me that your name is Oluwasimpleton, and that you will take her back when she comes begging.

She’s back begging already

adolphus08:

I am sure it's a woman who wrote the original piece. The writing is very defensive and goes against established facts about single mother raised children.
They spend time scandalizing their ex husbands to the children creating hatred and resentment.
All the bad boys who nearly led me and other young boys astray in our youths where all products of single mothers. They generally lacked discipline and flouted every rule in the book.
We used to admire their freedom and bravado.
Many of them ended up going into fraud and scam, becoming cultists and generally going against any form of responsible authority after school.
They got arrested from time to time and till date their lives are very mediocre and lackluster.
We where lucky for the discipline and structure imposed by our dads whenever we attempted to stray with them.

Exactly

It's a well known fact

I have also personal experience on this fact

I came from a well raised family, my Dad raised up all his children very well

And it tells on our own marriages

But a sibling of mine
Married a girl from a dysfunctional home

Today there marriage can't be compared to our other siblings that married from homes well raised

But the one having problem is because from later discovery that his wife was raised from a dysfunctional home

That's why I said a leopard cannot change its spot

It's not rocket science

And advice I will give to the single and unmarried:

Anybody you are talking marriage with
Scrutinize very well

If from a dysfunctional home or single mother better know what you are getting yourself into

Because the rapid rate of problem marriages abounding everywhere now is rooted in dysfunctional home or single motherhood

So better get sense as a single person

Don't ever allow Love deceive you

Cause when the wahala starts

Sorry will be your name

I hope you are the Father to the two kids?

Ah!
I trust team Agbafians,
there are somethings that doesn’t necessarily need an outside to tell you what to do next.

Wawelexy:

I don't know why a part of my mind is telling me that your name is Oluwasimpleton, and that you will take her back when she comes begging.

You be Weyrey boss

PrayWills:
Our court wedding was supposed to be on Friday. I caught her telling a married man I love you and calling each other all sweet names. I confronted her and she said she was telling of proving to me she was faithful that I should draw whatever conclusions I wanted to.

I went to work on Monday and came back and told her I wanted to pause the weeding until we could sort our issues and she said we should call it off totally.

As we speak she has moved back to her mom’s house with the two kids, what do I do?

PS: she was raised by a single mom

Leave her be. Whatever you do, don't go back and beg her or even communicate with her.

PrayWills:
Our court wedding was supposed to be on Friday. I caught her telling a married man I love you and calling each other all sweet names. I confronted her and she said she was telling of proving to me she was faithful that I should draw whatever conclusions I wanted to.

I went to work on Monday and came back and told her I wanted to pause the weeding until we could sort our issues and she said we should call it off totally.

As we speak she has moved back to her mom’s house with the two kids, what do I do?

PS: she was raised by a single mom

You shot yourself on the leg because you obviously know that women raised by single mothers don't turn out well and that's why you mentioned that she was raised by a single mother and you still shook head.

advanceDNA:


Nigga doesn't sound like someone that can leave the babe.....pvssy game and low self esteem can impair reasoning

Low self esteem has been a menace to many men in relationships

PrayWills:
Our court wedding was supposed to be on Friday. I caught her telling a married man I love you and calling each other all sweet names. I confronted her and she said she was telling of proving to me she was faithful that I should draw whatever conclusions I wanted to.

I went to work on Monday and came back and told her I wanted to pause the weeding until we could sort our issues and she said we should call it off totally.

As we speak she has moved back to her mom’s house with the two kids, what do I do?

PS: she was raised by a single mom

"With the two kids" whose 2 kids...where in the story did you mention them before?

immortalcrown:
Cohabitation is a red flag.

Both you and the lady are irresponsible. By the way, who owns the kids, you or her ex partner?

Good question

PrayWills:
Our court wedding was supposed to be on Friday. I caught her telling a married man I love you and calling each other all sweet names. I confronted her and she said she was telling of proving to me she was faithful that I should draw whatever conclusions I wanted to.

I went to work on Monday and came back and told her I wanted to pause the weeding until we could sort our issues and she said we should call it off totally.

As we speak she has moved back to her mom’s house with the two kids, what do I do?

PS: she was raised by a single mom

Rejoice bro!
She has foundational issue.

First confirm the DNA of the children.
If they are yours, is she faithful? If you are sure or think she isn't faithful, do you want to stay for the sake of your children? Marriage will involve a lot of work any which way. Defining your goals and objectives would help your decision making a great deal. For instance, do you want to please people or God? Displeasing your family in the matter will have consequences. Displeasing God will also bring eternal consequences. Take stock of your life and take charge of it.
You will need God's help and mercy. But how you live and what you live for will impact how God responds to you as well.
All the best.

PrayWills:
Our court wedding was supposed to be on Friday. I caught her telling a married man I love you and calling each other all sweet names. I confronted her and she said she was telling of proving to me she was faithful that I should draw whatever conclusions I wanted to.

I went to work on Monday and came back and told her I wanted to pause the weeding until we could sort our issues and she said we should call it off totally.

As we speak she has moved back to her mom’s house with the two kids, what do I do?

PS: she was raised by a single mom

I don't know why you started your story from the middle.

Now, what about the TWO KIDS.?
They are your kids?

How long have you guys and the kids living together?

A lot has been going on before then, maybe on her side, your side or even both sides. You just didn't notice or deliberately ignored the happenings,...... no sane person holds off a wedding because of one call.

pointblank247:
Op.
It's God that saved you from serious heart break. First you sound like a very soft man. If my woman is talking to another man and I caught her telling him "I love you" hmmmmm omo the marriage thing is very over. If she dare talk back in such situation she is in a more serious trouble.

Now let me talk to you as a man that is experienced in marriage.
SAVE YOUR SELF AND REFUSE TAKING HER BACK. Right now a married man is fuvking her mercilessly and when they are done, her parent will invite you for reconciliation and she may shade a few crocodile tears and like a simp, you will stupidly take her back.
Please don't.
A man that tolerate the disrespect of a loose woman doesn't live long

And she needed to space for her to give herself fully for the man who is nacking her

PrayWills:
Our court wedding was supposed to be on Friday. I caught her telling a married man I love you and calling each other all sweet names. I confronted her and she said she was telling of proving to me she was faithful that I should draw whatever conclusions I wanted to.

I went to work on Monday and came back and told her I wanted to pause the weeding until we could sort our issues and she said we should call it off totally.

As we speak she has moved back to her mom’s house with the two kids, what do I do?

PS: she was raised by a single mom

Stop stalking me Yes you stalking all of my comment... shey you've decided to do what you did? Allow me to be happy, I kept my end of the bargain, this on you not me ...

PrayWills:



Sabi Man.

I was trying to be a good man and father and made life too easy for her.


Thank you for your words, e touch me for the right place.

I am also happy for you, that you finally Woke Up!
What some men take Years, Sorrow, Tears and Blood ...and some even end-up in Prison for, is what you achieved (or Divinity achieved for you!), without breaking a sweat!
I guess your Mother is/was a good Woman and God had seen that her Son does not deserve to be enslaved by a Dellilah.

I want you to keep imagining, how horrible life would have been for you, if you married that Slot, had four Children with her, relocate her to UK, America or any of the Western Countries with all your Life Savings .... and then you make this discovery?

This is what a lot of Husbands are going through, right now.
This Court Wedding of a thing, is a "Sword of Damocles" hanging on every Man that goes through it.
Even the Oyinbos that brought it to us, have mostly stopped doing Court/Registry Legal Weddings, they mostly just start living together and have children, because they know it is just a burden on the Husbands but they make it look important and even mandate it on us (travel purposes!) at times.

Anyway. l digress.
Now that you have been "saved", do not go back into allowing any Woman take you for granted.
Shine your Eyes, Majority of Women of today (and maybe Men too), will Cheat on their Spouses in Marriage, to different degrees so, prepare your Mind, so that you dont get the shock of your Life.

If Nigeria was welcoming for its younger generations, l would have advised that No Young Husband/Father should ever contemplate moving the Family (Wife &Children) abroad because 95% of the time, the Wives use it to enslave their Husband (Foreign Laws that intentionally makes the Husband "submit by force" to his Wife and if not, use the Police to ruin his Life, That is the summary) but Nigerian Husbands/Fathers especially, want the best for their Children ... and Wife so, moving them Abroad has become a sort of "Walking into Danger, with Eyes wide Open".
It will only get worse.

I thank God on your behalf and wish you well, as you search for a replacement.
Dont be in a rush, you can have Kids without getting Married, if your age is putting you under pressure but EVERYTHING AND ANYTHING IN THIS WORLD is better, than having a cheating Wife, who will become a Quarrelsome Wife.

Right now, I am celebrating with a Glass of Hennessy, on your behalf.

globatop:
Pls consider the welfare of your kids, they should not be punished for their mom infidelity. Just try to fixit

u nor go last

Wawelexy:
Rejoice for what the lord has done... You just escaped! Rejoice bro.

Allow her go with the kids, let this current economic situation reset her brain, but make sure you are doing your quota has regards to the kids upkeep. If she comes back for reunion, please don't take her back. If you do, premium tears awaits you.


I don't know why a part of my mind is telling me that your name is Oluwasimpleton, and that you will take her back when she comes begging.

Upkeep?

If only DNA test were affordable

YourGFsnatcher:

Stop stalking me Yes you stalking all of my comment... shey you've decided to do what you did? Allow me to be happy, I kept my end of the bargain, this on you not me ...

What are you saying?