Elxandre: googler's tale sent shivers up my spine.
we live in a really unfair work world.

bellong:

May you be granted strength from the inner man. You will not faint in the time of adversity.

It is well with you.

BCELLS: I'm tired and sick of everything. I don't even know what else to do anymore. What comes to my mind every now and then now is situation gonna get worse. I ought to have graduated from a University since 2010 and go for NYSC 2011 but hitherto I still cannot . It has been one issue to another. All my mates have gone far and doing something good with their life but I'm just seated right here doing nothing. I'm almost 30year old and still haven't got nothing still in my fathers house. Nothing is working everything in shamble. Life sucks

sholay2011: @Googler Hmmmm!!!! All is well sir. Please don't do anything drastic. Just take a step back and be positive-minded about your challenges.

I dunno how to 'advise' sef but I know God didn't promise us an easy journey in life, only a safe arrival. Even the people you're 'admiring or envious of' have serious challenges they're perfectly hiding behind those fake smiles in their heavily-edited pictures splattered all over social media. Yearn for your situation to improve to make yourself and future family happy, but not to impress outsiders.

I actually admire your trait of not 'being an expert in cheating/backstabbing etc.' to get by, especially in a country like Nigeria. I am quite close to that too. We can still make it regardless of the societal norm. In fact, our chances should be higher (though more difficult) 'cos we've chosen to be different. Honesty is still the best policy.. .it hasn't changed.

Please don't give up on your University education. ..I beg you. When the going gets tough, the tough gets going. Before you know it, this difficult period that seems infinite is just a phase that has fizzled into your past. If you're religious, you can also seek God's face as to the next step to take at this stage of one's life.

Amidst your hustle to be comfortable and achieve set goals as a man, never lose the best parts of yourself and always keep improving on your weaknesses. Also, always remember life is an echo. Whatever you sow, you will reap, what you see in others exists in you, whatever you give will always come back to you. So, give goodness.

#This is coming from someone whose situation is worse (in an entirely different way though), at least in my opinion#

Btw, I love the opening lines of the song 'Lean On Me':
" Sometimes in our lives, we all have pains...we all have sorrows. ..but, if we are wise....we know that there's. ..always tomorrow. .. "

Stegomiah: Suicide is not a solution to whatever you are going thru, it ends the possibility of things getting better, it kills the hope for a brighter future/tomorrow.

Another thing is that God gave us life, and taking it away by yourself is a great sin before God, infact suicide is the greatest sin sm1 can commit. Av read some posts about people feeling suicidal here in the family section, and i think these people needs help, and counselling, am using this medium 2 plead on dia bhalf, please do not insult, push, blame..them, they need words of encouragement, motivation and inspiration and i think that is the aim of this thread in the first place, and 4 those having a suicidal tot/feelings pls come out and share with us so we can help, and avoid being lonely cos research has shown that majority of those that commit suicide at one point or the other do isolate themselves 4rm people, pls be free 2 share with us. †нªηкs!

9janinja:


......I'm 1 of them *intears*

onegig: How please?

9janinja:
...inears Typing it and also admitting dat It.(being 1 of them)

onegig: Can you please explain? There are people willig to listen.

9janinja:
....yes but no 1 is willing to fine a lasting solution to dis problem .even d society is worse Dan hell, not to talk of family members. There's more my prayer iz dat none of ur peeps won't xperience it , cos rite now I'm alone in d crowd . Thanks 4 ur concern .

onegig: You are never alone. There's nothing new under the sun. I may not understand your pains because I am not you. I just believe talking is a first step at solving things. You never know who's reading and may offer you help . A problem shared is half solved bro. You are an old timer here and should know better.

9janinja:

.....if u want to help ,fine just help me achieve my goals , by doing dat , my goals n success'll avenge 4 me .

onegig: What are your goals?

Sorry for the late response

9janinja:

My goals r pretty much and its confidential

onegig: We all do have lots of goals. One of mine is staying happy. Working on it I have not to totally achieved it but I am still striving. I still got many others. I wanna visit Venice, I wanna be successful, I want to be responsible, I want to build a one stop shop IT solutions centre ..etc You can see my goals are pretty much and those are just ones I can recall now.

It's an open forun. No need to be scared about confidentiality. I doubt if anyone can identify your id. However you can send anyone a pm. Take care

9janinja:

....that's exactly some of d things I ave in mind but I don't ave much time left .k, I'll list a few ,
*I want all dat u listed
*I want to be a successful entrepreneur
*I wanna get married to an educated lady
*I want to be more responsible N matured
*I want to socialise with people who can add value to my life
*I want to be happy and many more
....dats all I can remember for now

RoyalRoy:

All your goals are achievable. You only need to pick them one by one.

Smile!!!

You will be fine.

9janinja:

"pick them one after the other " hmmm for a complicated and weird human-being like me wit a low self esteem ?

9janinja:
"pick them one after the other " hmmm for a complicated and weird human-being like me wit a low self esteem ?

Googler: Life is complicated. The thing about being broke is not that you are not in control of what you do or what happens to you. Other people are. And this can bring about a situation of feelings of helplessness. Give you some examples.

1. A colonel sent to my state in the mid-80’s implemented a policy that has left me floundering for years on end.

2. The only good job I ever got, one (13 odd years ago, paid okay and was trekable from my pad) was lost because a member of staff decided to burgle the place and steal stuff, setting off a chain of events that led to detention and termination of the job of every administrative member of staff.

3. When I went to university in the late 90’s I could not complete it because a certain military administrator had put in place some very bad policies which saw fees going up astronomically.

4. When I tried to run an online business a couple of years back, I underestimated the extent of my adverse reaction to stress. Staying up late and getting up early quickly took its toll and I had to abandon the project after losing my entire savings – it wasn’t much, but it was my entire savings.

5. I am currently studying for a degree in law. But someone, somewhere, has decided to bungle my school’s accreditation process – meaning I may not go to law school and my degree will look like eba without soup. Had I any control, I would have gone to a better school.

My present job entails spending between 6 and 7 hours or more in traffic daily (Ogun State go VI) and the pay is just enough to cover that transport and feed you a little. My school fees and co have to come from what I manage to make from writing and editing which is very irregular.

I suspect that the script for our lives is written before we are born. I suspect there is a reason for it - which reason may explain why God does not intervene. Look at me. I could have graduated long long ago and settled into an okay job. But that was not to be. I can be very productive given the right environment – but I’ve been thrown into the most inhospitable physical and emotional environment of all, a roiling lough that appears to blind the eyes and bind the hands. How do you get productive with my working circumstances if you react easily to the stress? You dare not resign because being socially inept (what a post above mine calls being “weird”) has ensured you don’t have any network of friends. So you’re stuck – you can’t get a good job and you can’t go on your own. Fifteen years ago I wanted to be a fiction writer. I think I was quite good at it. Hell, I was winning prizes. But the striving to get food got in the way. I had to eat and I couldn’t combine that with fiction writing. Because, yes, you got it - stress.

I’m not atheist and I have never doubted the existence of God in all these. Why? Because I can see a pattern in everything. I have never completely starved, or been rendered homeless. Food usually turns up when I thought it was over. Things never go so bad I can’t get to the next day. It’s as if the script allows the basics, the barest basics, but nothing more. I can eat. I have a room. But I want a proper apartment. I want a home. I want a wife. I want children feeling my ears with their shrieks. But these have been pipe dreams. That is why one would, perhaps, have been better off with sturdy muscles going to some village farm without a care in the world. But I don’t think God or demons or witches have anything to do with any of these. Sounds complicated? Well, that’s another topic - God. But I hope it explains why I suspect that the script for our lives is written before we are born. You see, there was a time I thought the reasons I can’t bring myself to hurt a fellow human being by stealing from them or cheating or deceiving them is because I’m a good person and those who have no qualms duping old pensioners of their entire life savings are bad people. Now, I’m not so sure it's about being inherently good or bad. I suspect that temperament may explain things. We’re all victims of our temperament.

But, yes, hope one must. So thanks to Angeldemivida, sholay11, onegig, bellong and everyone else. Yes, I have visited the Business section a few times. Once my exams are over next month I am planning to leverage on my residual IT skills and go for video editing training, teach myself website development and spend some time promoting my editing side job online. If my degree will not be useful (they say they’re working on accreditation) I might retain my sanity by trying something else.

Thank you for reading. I won’t have gone into this with anyone – no one cares, not because they’re bad people but because they’re not meant to. So it feels good to ramble on an anonymous forum.

desperatetowin: Nobody knows what it's like dealing with a condition that affects all of your life,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,i want to be free,,,just close my eyes, open them and am free,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

eat right like am doing,,
exercise more like am doing,
and see results at the end of the day,,,,,,,but am not seeing results,,,,,,am just hopelessly about to give up,,cos this weight is embarrasing me and my family..................

desperatetowin: Nobody knows what it's like dealing with a condition that affects all of your life,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,i want to be free,,,just close my eyes, open them and am free,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

eat right like am doing,,
exercise more like am doing,
and see results at the end of the day,,,,,,,but am not seeing results,,,,,,am just hopelessly about to give up,,cos this weight is embarrasing me and my family..................

Googler: Life is complicated. The thing about being broke is not that you are not in control of what you do or what happens to you. Other people are. And this can bring about a situation of feelings of helplessness. Give you some examples.

1. A colonel sent to my state in the mid-80’s implemented a policy that has left me floundering for years on end.

2. The only good job I ever got, one (13 odd years ago, paid okay and was trekable from my pad) was lost because a member of staff decided to burgle the place and steal stuff, setting off a chain of events that led to detention and termination of the job of every administrative member of staff.

3. When I went to university in the late 90’s I could not complete it because a certain military administrator had put in place some very bad policies which saw fees going up astronomically.

4. When I tried to run an online business a couple of years back, I underestimated the extent of my adverse reaction to stress. Staying up late and getting up early quickly took its toll and I had to abandon the project after losing my entire savings – it wasn’t much, but it was my entire savings.

5. I am currently studying for a degree in law. But someone, somewhere, has decided to bungle my school’s accreditation process – meaning I may not go to law school and my degree will look like eba without soup. Had I any control, I would have gone to a better school.

My present job entails spending between 6 and 7 hours or more in traffic daily (Ogun State go VI) and the pay is just enough to cover that transport and feed you a little. My school fees and co have to come from what I manage to make from writing and editing which is very irregular.

I suspect that the script for our lives is written before we are born. I suspect there is a reason for it - which reason may explain why God does not intervene. Look at me. I could have graduated long long ago and settled into an okay job. But that was not to be. I can be very productive given the right environment – but I’ve been thrown into the most inhospitable physical and emotional environment of all, a roiling lough that appears to blind the eyes and bind the hands. How do you get productive with my working circumstances if you react easily to the stress? You dare not resign because being socially inept (what a post above mine calls being “weird”) has ensured you don’t have any network of friends. So you’re stuck – you can’t get a good job and you can’t go on your own. Fifteen years ago I wanted to be a fiction writer. I think I was quite good at it. Hell, I was winning prizes. But the striving to get food got in the way. I had to eat and I couldn’t combine that with fiction writing. Because, yes, you got it - stress.

I’m not atheist and I have never doubted the existence of God in all these. Why? Because I can see a pattern in everything. I have never completely starved, or been rendered homeless. Food usually turns up when I thought it was over. Things never go so bad I can’t get to the next day. It’s as if the script allows the basics, the barest basics, but nothing more. I can eat. I have a room. But I want a proper apartment. I want a home. I want a wife. I want children feeling my ears with their shrieks. But these have been pipe dreams. That is why one would, perhaps, have been better off with sturdy muscles going to some village farm without a care in the world. But I don’t think God or demons or witches have anything to do with any of these. Sounds complicated? Well, that’s another topic - God. But I hope it explains why I suspect that the script for our lives is written before we are born. You see, there was a time I thought the reasons I can’t bring myself to hurt a fellow human being by stealing from them or cheating or deceiving them is because I’m a good person and those who have no qualms duping old pensioners of their entire life savings are bad people. Now, I’m not so sure it's about being inherently good or bad. I suspect that temperament may explain things. We’re all victims of our temperament.

But, yes, hope one must. So thanks to Angeldemivida, sholay11, onegig, bellong and everyone else. Yes, I have visited the Business section a few times. Once my exams are over next month I am planning to leverage on my residual IT skills and go for video editing training, teach myself website development and spend some time promoting my editing side job online. If my degree will not be useful (they say they’re working on accreditation) I might retain my sanity by trying something else.

Thank you for reading. I won’t have gone into this with anyone – no one cares, not because they’re bad people but because they’re not meant to. So it feels good to ramble on an anonymous forum.