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Is It Wrong For Christians To End A Marriage Due To Impotency Of A Partner - Religion (5) - Nairaland

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Re: Is It Wrong For Christians To End A Marriage Due To Impotency Of A Partner by josite: 11:45am On Oct 05, 2014
lynpetra:
i believe i am, getting married because i love,cherish and wish to spend my natural life with a well deserved companion..Kids are added advantage.I can not and will not,in all my existence in this life and in the after divorce my husband on that groun.Impotency is not and will not be the basis to measure my marriage.It won't even bring chaos.It sure can bring one thing and that's redemption.I will prove to him that he has got me,we must find a way to have children of our own,if he choose to be open minded.Impotency to me is Nothing.Not even my parents,friends will ever know nada!Not even the gods!!

u sounds impressive.where will u b located .

1 Like

Re: Is It Wrong For Christians To End A Marriage Due To Impotency Of A Partner by rezzy: 11:56am On Oct 05, 2014
Yes and No

Yes, if he marries me under deceit knowing fully well he is impotent. I wont waste time because God didnt join us, it was deceit.

No, and if i'm very sure he wasnt aware of his impotency before we got married.
Re: Is It Wrong For Christians To End A Marriage Due To Impotency Of A Partner by Nobody: 12:09pm On Oct 05, 2014
Kirinwa:


As a matter of fact there's no reason for divorce because divorce on grounds of adultery was given in old testament cos of their sturbornness but New testament says stay married Until death do you part.

What baffles me is that some preachers divorce and remarry. Whatever informs that decision.

Besides op I guess you are still single cos I cant fathom how a married person was asleep during declaration of marriage oaths.
Read mattew 5 vs 27-28;mattew 19vs9; 1 corinthians 6vs 9-10. Notice that this law is not gender specific.
Re: Is It Wrong For Christians To End A Marriage Due To Impotency Of A Partner by 2mNaira: 12:14pm On Oct 05, 2014
josite:
IF THE IMPOTENCY has not always been there,if it develops after the marriage.it is best to take it as a sickness and a christian is certainly not the person that abandons a sick person cus of sickness,so it is wrong for a christain to abandon a spouse cus of impotence or sickness.

if however a christain elects to be human as most of us christians often do ,expecting GOD to understand,the spouse should be ly and kindly given the options to suggest an acceptable man that will be providing the much needed sex/sperm as many of our forefathers faced with the same challenge used to do or better still to agree to a divorce cus it is best to leave rather than cause the impotent man additional pain.it may even be that GOD wants to bless the impotent man and he wants you to be out of his life before he does so.dont be suprised the moment you abandon the impotent man,he becomes potent and gives your best friend a triplet producing pregnancy.

marriage is created by law and the law of nigeria allows you to divorce if the guy cannot consume u.note however a man may be potent meaning he has good erection and yet not virile.so you need to say the exact definition of impotence cos quite a number of men that dont have a good enough erection for appreciable length of time are virile meaning if their sperm drops inot your pussy,u get pregnant meaning they are impotent by reason of no erection but potent by being capable of having productive sperm.

if you mean he is not virle,not productive and you really waant to have kids,i will advise you divorce if both of u cannot aggreed on another man impregnating u.Atimes impotency arises out of incompatibility from heaven or hell and change of partners resolves the issue as one of the partners may be labouring under an unbroken curse.

It is evil to hold down a man or woman into the marriage if they dont want to stay.as paul says let the unbelieving spouse departs if they want to.A SMART,WISE,GODLY imptent man will not force the spouse to say if she wants to leave,let her go especially if she is approaching menopause.

I am sorry you have misquoted paul.

Paul mentioned two scenarios:
1. Two people got married as unbelievers and one of them later become born again, while the other remains an unbeliever.
2. Two people marries as b.a believers.

In the scenario one, if the believing man/woman chooses to leave because the of the other's new found faith : He/she may very well may. The other can freely remarry. However, the believing partner must not and may not leave the unbelieving partner. He can seperate without divorce and remain unmarried however.

In scenario one, neither the believing man nor the believing woman may leave each the other. They can however be seperated and remain unmarried.

Paul instructs seperation because divorce is not allowed in such cases. Seperated couples are still married couples, there could be settlement and reconciliation in the future.

1 Like

Re: Is It Wrong For Christians To End A Marriage Due To Impotency Of A Partner by Toks2008(m): 12:17pm On Oct 05, 2014
koyyes:

You are wrong and no true christian should believe your epistle.

Be specific please,which side should they disbelieve? and please make your assertions right by intelligently stating why you think otherwise rather than approaching it dogmatically.
Re: Is It Wrong For Christians To End A Marriage Due To Impotency Of A Partner by Nobody: 12:27pm On Oct 05, 2014
Kay17:


It begs the question: who defines marriage, God or the State?

God!
Re: Is It Wrong For Christians To End A Marriage Due To Impotency Of A Partner by 2mNaira: 12:28pm On Oct 05, 2014
Toks2008:


Be specific please,which side should they disbelieve? and please make your assertions right by intelligently stating why you think otherwise rather than approaching it dogmatically.

You are partly right but using wrong approach.

Yes, the emphasis was on the woman when jesus spoke about it, when he said except on the ground of adultery.
But you seem to condole infidelity on the part of men. That is where your approach is wrong. Infidelity is not expected of christians, real christians and this thread is addressed to real christians I believe. The man who make a habit or culture of infidelity, is priobably not a real christian.

By the way, i Paul's epistle, which was inspired by the holy spirit, the was no gender prefernce . It applies to both sexes. No sex is given preference.

Jesus wa was speaking to Jews who had a divorce background, that is why he spoke like that. For new testament christians, no sex distinction. Bible says, "In christ Jesus.. there is neither male or female , bond or free , but a new creation.

So u you see, divorce and infidelity is not allowed for both sex.

1 Like

Re: Is It Wrong For Christians To End A Marriage Due To Impotency Of A Partner by Nobody: 12:31pm On Oct 05, 2014
kamo2930yahoo:
the question says IS IT WRONG? And u said NO? Your answer ought to be YES judging by your reasons.

Too many thoughts about money in my head jare.
Corrected!

I actually used "NO" to imply that "No divorce is allowed". Wrong usage though.
Re: Is It Wrong For Christians To End A Marriage Due To Impotency Of A Partner by Consultville(m): 12:34pm On Oct 05, 2014
Wisdom is profitable to direct.
Re: Is It Wrong For Christians To End A Marriage Due To Impotency Of A Partner by graciousme(f): 12:41pm On Oct 05, 2014
In my opinion, I think impotency should be distinguished from sterility. Impotency means a man can not perform sexually while sterility means he can perform but might find it difficult to father a child.

A woman with an impotent man can't or won't enjoy s*x. While a sterile man can give his wife some satisfaction.

So how would the wife of the impotent man enjoy s*x in her marriage talk more of having children?

God can heal the man, the doctors too can try. So let her take it to the Lord in prayers

1 Like

Re: Is It Wrong For Christians To End A Marriage Due To Impotency Of A Partner by Larow(m): 12:44pm On Oct 05, 2014
olayinka63:
not only christian islam forbade muslim from marriage due to impotency cos it has great defects in family life
who is talking about islam here? The bible says the just shall live by faith. Where then is the faith when impotency can cause a dissolution of ones home? Please don't bring islam into this because in this marriage issue, both religion has nothing in common.
Re: Is It Wrong For Christians To End A Marriage Due To Impotency Of A Partner by fagin1982(m): 12:44pm On Oct 05, 2014
The Catholic Church concents to Divorce only when your Life is threatned and issues relating to impotency .. If a partner chooses to hide his or her impotency and enters the union with such secret..The Church concludes that you decieved your partner into marrying you


The the celebration of Holy Matrimony ..The priest asks .." Mr or Miss ........Have you come to the Alter of God at your own free will and mind "

Meaning u have examined all concerning your partner spiritually ..physically and other wise

At such point the vows end with Till death do us path

But in a situation one partner decieves the other into marriage knowing he or she is impotent ..

The Catholic Church having done thier own investigation will dissolve the marriage

so my answer is NO ..ITS NOT WRONG
Re: Is It Wrong For Christians To End A Marriage Due To Impotency Of A Partner by Nobody: 1:09pm On Oct 05, 2014
I nw undastood why a gal i recently dated held my dick intentionally in d ofice to knw if somethin is dia. She has neva been to my house despite my spending on her cos i'm nt bothered to take her home. It's obvious she wanted to knw if i'm nt impotent cos wen i reacted by reciprocating her 'touching' me, she rushed out of my ofice.
Re: Is It Wrong For Christians To End A Marriage Due To Impotency Of A Partner by macof(m): 1:09pm On Oct 05, 2014
striktlymi:


God!

grin when has god ever defined marriage..
Is it the one men said god said? grin

1 Like

Re: Is It Wrong For Christians To End A Marriage Due To Impotency Of A Partner by 2mNaira: 1:22pm On Oct 05, 2014
macof:


grin when has god ever defined marriage..
Is it the one men said god said? grin
Marriage was defined by God the creator in genesis when he said,'It is not good for man to be alone.I will make him an help suitable for him.
Marrige is is the union of a man and woman primarily for companionship.
Re: Is It Wrong For Christians To End A Marriage Due To Impotency Of A Partner by Nobody: 1:29pm On Oct 05, 2014
lanrefront1:
You didn't explain yourself well.

Are you taking about couples who have been married for many or several years and something now happened to the husband?

(There is female impotency too but the I'll assume we're talking about that of the male since it's the most common and understandable)

Then the second scenario: a man and woman gets married and the wife discovers that the husband is impotent. Such a marriage can definitely be dissolved by church elders or authority.
once married you're in except the sin of adultery
Re: Is It Wrong For Christians To End A Marriage Due To Impotency Of A Partner by macof(m): 1:39pm On Oct 05, 2014
mnairaland:

Marriage was defined by God the creator in genesis when he said,'It is not good for man to be alone.I will make him an help suitable for him.
Marrige is is the union of a man and woman primarily for companionship.

Did u hear these words from the mouth of god?
Or u read it from the words of men

2 Likes

Re: Is It Wrong For Christians To End A Marriage Due To Impotency Of A Partner by Nobody: 1:41pm On Oct 05, 2014
Toks2008:


Be specific please,which side should they disbelieve? and please make your assertions right by intelligently stating why you think otherwise rather than approaching it dogmatically.
The law concerning adultery applies both to male and female. Right from the begining, if men were wired to be polygamous, Adam would have had two or more women created for his selfish desire. Just because men like solomon,david among others had more than one wife does not mean it was permitted. Infact, God chose to ignore certain believes that became a norm among the isrealites untill Jesus Christ came and stressed on the need for who ever listens to him to keep the marriage bed undefiled. Read mattew 5 vs28-29. If Jesus was not refering to a married man,he wouldn't utter the word adultery. If a woman choses to stay with an unrepentant adulterous man,that is the choice she made. But if she choses to leave,it is not up to you to decide if she made the right choice or not. Remember what the bible says about each one carrying his own load? That is to buttress the fact that the loyalty and faithfulness of a wife can not save an unrepentant adulterous husband (1 corinthians 6vs 9-11) No scripture permits 'christian' males to commit adultery. To support such ideology would be to categorize yourself under the kind of people mattew 15 vs8-9 talks about.
Re: Is It Wrong For Christians To End A Marriage Due To Impotency Of A Partner by Nobody: 1:46pm On Oct 05, 2014
mnairaland:


You are partly right but using wrong approach.

Yes, the emphasis was on the woman when jesus spoke about it, when he said except on the ground of adultery.
But you seem to condole infidelity on the part of men. That is where your approach is wrong. Infidelity is not expected of christians, real christians and this thread is addressed to real christians I believe. The man who make a habit or culture of infidelity, is priobably not a real christian.

By the way, i Paul's epistle, which was inspired by the holy spirit, the was no gender prefernce . It applies to both sexes. No sex is given preference.

Jesus wa was speaking to Jews who had a divorce background, that is why he spoke like that. For new testament christians, no sex distinction. Bible says, "In christ Jesus.. there is neither male or female , bond or free , but a new creation.

So u you see, divorce and infidelity is not allowed for both sex.
Thank you.
Re: Is It Wrong For Christians To End A Marriage Due To Impotency Of A Partner by DENJIZZY(m): 1:49pm On Oct 05, 2014
What of ladies dat end unionism because the husband has a small pen*is
Re: Is It Wrong For Christians To End A Marriage Due To Impotency Of A Partner by darlingnuel(m): 1:51pm On Oct 05, 2014
lynpetra:
i believe i am, getting married because i love,cherish and wish to spend my natural life with a well deserved companion..Kids are added advantage.I can not and will not,in all my existence in this life and in the after divorce my husband on that groun.Impotency is not and will not be the basis to measure my marriage.It won't even bring chaos.It sure can bring one thing and that's redemption.I will prove to him that he has got me,we must find a way to have children of our own,if he choose to be open minded.Impotency to me is Nothing.Not even my parents,friends will ever know nada!Not even the gods!!
I'm wowed! Wish every lady would reason this way. This is how an IDEAL (as opposed to the REAL) wife should reason.
Re: Is It Wrong For Christians To End A Marriage Due To Impotency Of A Partner by Misogynist2014(m): 1:59pm On Oct 05, 2014
born2fuck:
Being a christian doesn't mean you should be mumu, even Jesus was never mumu as people of now a days Christianity, I remember dem David, Solomon, Elijah, and Moses, all of dem sharp. If your marriage have issue, divorced and get a new life, there is always room for forgiveness
Shall we then continue to sin, and pray that grace may abound?
Re: Is It Wrong For Christians To End A Marriage Due To Impotency Of A Partner by Armaggeddon: 2:05pm On Oct 05, 2014
Am not a christian but as far as for better for worse which the xtians are mouthing is concerned, it is morally wrong to dissolve marriage because of impotence. Sometimes I wonder whether Bible is complete because issues like this should have been settled.
Take this pose,
What if one of them develops mental illness after an accident that affects the head. A thing like this can happen after marriage and dissolution of such marriage will be greatly unfair to the member with such issue.
Sometimes I wonder whether this for better for worse is from God. If it is, then, it is too much to handle in some cases.

1 Like

Re: Is It Wrong For Christians To End A Marriage Due To Impotency Of A Partner by zikclassiq(m): 2:24pm On Oct 05, 2014
jacabi:
Till death do you part.
Re: Is It Wrong For Christians To End A Marriage Due To Impotency Of A Partner by LordReed(m): 2:28pm On Oct 05, 2014
striktlymi:
The question here should be: was there ever a marriage to start with?

In my view, a number of factors must be considered before someone can truly claim that he or she is married.

1) The union must be one entered with full consent.
2) The couples must be able to consummate the union via the conjugal act.
3) The couples must have attained the age of reasoning.

Without those 3, there is no marriage. A man who is impotent would have defaulted on at least one of the above. The lady would be right to ask for a dissolution of the union as divorce does not come to play here.

And if it is the woman that is unable to bear children, what then?
Re: Is It Wrong For Christians To End A Marriage Due To Impotency Of A Partner by Timdgurl(f): 2:29pm On Oct 05, 2014
I dun believe there's impotency in a Christian marriage. 'Be fruitful and multiply' says God our creator himself.
When you've waited as long as Father Abraham did, trusting God and being obedient like he did, you can then talk about being impotent
And why would would a Christian want divorce cos of that? it's not your partner's fault, is it? Even if it is, this is what 'for better, for worse' means.
Re: Is It Wrong For Christians To End A Marriage Due To Impotency Of A Partner by babyphaze77(m): 2:35pm On Oct 05, 2014
You people here are too religious......is for better for worst inside the bible? Instead of churches asking for pregnancy test result, genotype and whatever......why don't they ask for the sperm analysis of the man also to make it equal. It is the impotency of the man dat will lead to adultery and divorce follows. It is inevitable...... The best is never to enter into a wrong relationship.
Re: Is It Wrong For Christians To End A Marriage Due To Impotency Of A Partner by Nobody: 2:36pm On Oct 05, 2014
enkay4love:
Point of correction,impotency is'nt an inherent problem,it is simply caused by man-made factors.
helloooo! I'm not ignorant of the fact that some causes of impotency can be man-made..or didn't u read this part of my post? :
booqee: Well except in a case where the person caused it himself
and didn't tell his/her partner...
but wait miss, don't tell me impotency can never be an inherent problem. wtf?!!

enkay4love:
A man can be impotent for life,if he had untreated mumps as a child,untreated STDs especially Syphilis as an adult & if he has a spirit wife. A woman can be impotent in marriage,if she damaged her womb thru an abortion by a quack in her single days,untreated STDs & if she has a spirit husband. That's all for now.Above all,it pays to be health-conscious & prayerful at all times,cos that's the only weapon.
It appears you've not been very exposed to the happenings of this life. I have heard testimony of a woman born without an ovary and never menstruated, but gave birth miraculously though after some time..and yet her husband married her a virgin. Now how can u explain that as self inflicted? listen to me there are men and women out there that have not done any wrong or crazy thing to their body and health out of the ordinary but yet find themselves in such position. As u said some can be spiritual :
enkay4love:
& if she has a spirit husband

But you surprise me, you mention something spiritually related and yet still boldly say all causes of impotency are man made. Is it one's fault that an enemy decides for no reason to inflict impotency on you, or even give u 'a spirit husband'?

I can't believe I'm even having this argument gosh...
Re: Is It Wrong For Christians To End A Marriage Due To Impotency Of A Partner by Nobody: 2:58pm On Oct 05, 2014
LordReed:


And if it is the woman that is unable to bear children, what then?

Same principle!
Re: Is It Wrong For Christians To End A Marriage Due To Impotency Of A Partner by UmecheMoses(m): 3:07pm On Oct 05, 2014
born2fuck:
Being a christian doesn't mean you should be mumu, even Jesus was never mumu as people of now a days Christianity, I remember dem David, Solomon, Elijah, and Moses, all of dem sharp. If your marriage have issue, divorced and get a new life, there is always room for forgiveness
Like I always say, think before you type, do not allow Nairaland to lead,you into unforgivable sin.
Re: Is It Wrong For Christians To End A Marriage Due To Impotency Of A Partner by LordReed(m): 3:13pm On Oct 05, 2014
striktlymi:


Same principle!

It is unfortunate that you would advise that a couple divorce simply because one or the other of them is unable to bear children. Marriage and divorce are not kids games were you take turns to do a hop skotch. As an institution strictly for adults it is necessary adult solutions be sort for some of these issues. We have the best of both worlds in that we can seek both spiritual and physical aid to our problems as Christians and to suggest that divorce is the prime solution for some of these situations is like cutting off the head to cure a headache.

2 Likes

Re: Is It Wrong For Christians To End A Marriage Due To Impotency Of A Partner by Nobody: 3:16pm On Oct 05, 2014
LordReed:


It is unfortunate that you would advise that a couple divorce simply because one or the other of them is unable to bear children. Marriage and divorce are not kids games were you take turns to do a hop skotch. As an institution strictly for adults it is necessary adult solutions be sort for some of these issues. We have the best of both worlds in that we can seek both spiritual and physical aid to our problems as Christians and to suggest that divorce is the prime solution for some of these situations is like cutting off the head to cure a headache.

I stopped reading when you mentioned divorce.

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