This is a really troubling issue for me, and I need mature advices pls.

My fiance and I have bin dating for the past two years, and our wedding date is fixed,but there's a problem...He is too attached to his parents,like a little child. it amazes me that he doesn't seem to see what it's doing to our relationship.


I want him to be a man, and stand on his own. I had to talk and talk before he moved out of their house,nd get a place of his own. Now he goes to their place every week, de call him almost everyday, and he does same. I really love him,cos he's a good man, but this is one thing I can't cope with. Pls Wat do I do about this?

it's a gradual process, give him sometime.

Help him grow some balls.

My sister... Only God can be 100%

From wah you said you love him,
if u keep telling him, I believe he might change

Just calm down wif him
Maybe he's a type that always stay with his family in is teenage ( I mean he doesn't like to go out 2much)

i think thats why you ar there for him, help him grow...nd check why he is so attached to them, may b they shows him much love, care nd concern, you've got to show him much more, i bet he will b attached to you too
tnks

No one's perfect, just try as much as possible to show him more and more love. Mind you, if you wanna discuss this with him make sure you do it in a very careful way.

That's so sad!

Don't be jealous that i love my people..

his hour of awakening will soon dawn on him..give him time

Sounds like he's an only child or son, they are always like that. You just have to bear with him, I believe once he gets his own family and children, he will set his priorities right. At least, he's a good man.

These seems to be the problem with a lot of couples these days...either the wife is too clingy to his parents, or it is the husband that is like that. It can cause some friction between the couple.

This is a tuff one as you don't want him to think you don't like his people. It's a good thing he has moved out his parents house. That's a first step. Start planning interesting things you two can do together so he spends more time with you. With time, when you guys start having kids and other responsibilities, he would be more independent of his parents.

I smell exaggeration. It can't be that bad.

About the phone call issue; there is nothing wrong with checking on your family everyday. If he doesn't have time for his folks what makes you think he will have time for you later on. He met you just how many years ago? This is still his family and you are not a member yet.

Let him be. You should be very happy cos when you have kids, you can be sure that he will put family first.

.

Tymax:
I smell exaggeration. It can't be that bad.

About the phone call issue; there is nothing wrong with checking on your family everyday. If he doesn't have time for his folks what makes you think he will have time for you later on. He met you just how many years ago? This is still his family and you are not a member yet.

Let him be. You should be very happy cos when you have kids, you can be sure that he will put family first.

Best comment so far, loaded with wisdom.

Makes me wonder what women really want.

D guy is a family oriented kinda guy n it's a problem? take a chill pill girl, d guy is going to gradually redirect dat attention at u n ur kids!

jus giv him beautiful kids n keep lovin him loads n loads...

zomoears:




Best comment so far, loaded with wisdom.

Makes me wonder what women really want.

D guy is a family oriented kinda guy n it's a problem? take a chill pill girl, d guy is going to gradually redirect dat attention at u n ur kids!

jus giv him beautiful kids n keep lovin him loads n loads...

I want to believe I know where ur comment is coming from. But Wat u don't see is dat, this clingy attitude is not making him grow, he sounds immature sometimes,and I wonder if I'm talking to a grown man or a kid. I'm not against him bin family-oriented, which woman wouldn't love dat? But not at d detriment of him refusing to grow!

Tymax:
I smell exaggeration. It can't be that bad.

About the phone call issue; there is nothing wrong with checking on your family everyday. If he doesn't have time for his folks what makes you think he will have time for you later on. He met you just how many years ago? This is still his family and you are not a member yet.

Let him be. You should be very happy cos when you have kids, you can be sure that he will put family first.

Mr man! U haven't seen exaggeration! A "man" calls his mother for assistance on tins he can have his fiance do, the mother knows when he has a headache before his fiance,so Wat is d duty of a fiance? Have time for d folks u say...do u know there's every possibility that he asks his mother to move in with us after wedding, at dat point I should say Wat? all I'm saying is dat it is immature of a man to be dat clingy. Not a man in his 30's for heaven sake!

MzPreshie:
Sounds like he's an only child or son, they are always like that. You just have to bear with him, I believe once he gets his own family and children, he will set his priorities right. At least, he's a good man.

Hmmmmn,he is not an only child. He's d second child out of 4kids. I get Wat you're saying dear, I just worry about those issues people leave unsettled until marriage. But I'm hoping dis one works. Thank u!

Sumtyms women think de knw so much abt men but d truth is u ladies knw little even wen we tro all d cue at u, u still don't get it (soundin lyk dos gals talk on green light)

U av to find wats d cos of the attachment n fill d damn space. For me m so attached to my dads huz cos I need to eat n I can't cook, a lady hu wants me to stop goin dia on a daily basis shud cook n maybe I will be goin dia every oda day.

I also go to my dads huz cos of d noise n discussion btwn my mom n I or my dad n I, or d area pple as against my quiet environment, if u don't want me to go dia, den be a gud listener n talker. I don't knw if u get my point?

First identify d reason of his attachment den fill d need, he may protest n tell u stuff like stop playin my parents/ but be geniunely persistent its gonna pay off.

No need to try to talk to him, he is gonna tell his parents wat eva u tell him, just act it n don't talk (I mean dont nag abt it ) n no sex is not gonna kip him glued to u, sex is highly ova rated.

You must accept him for whom he is, is just a matter of time the whole attention will be transfer to you and your children alone, remember anything he's doing today(especially good things) his children must copy it and you guys(mummy N daddy) will enjoy it

deebee13:
Mr man! U haven't seen exaggeration! A "man" calls his mother for assistance on tins he can have his fiance do, [size=14]the mother knows when he has a headache before his fiance,[/size] so Wat is d duty of a fiance? Have time for d folks u say...do u know there's every possibility that he asks his mother to move in with us after wedding, at dat point I should say Wat? all I'm saying is dat it is immature of a man to be dat clingy. Not a man in his 30's for heaven sake!

Babe, you are still exaggerating. Calm down. I hope you won't voice this complaint to him. You don't want him to be self-conscious when dealing with his folks. It's added confusion that a man doesn't need.

You think his mom doesn't suspect what you think of her? Let me tall you, she most probably does. Now if she has so much sway over her son's marital decisions, you should realize that she has accepted you. Isn't that good? You shouldn't appear to be competing with his mom. Your respective roles in his life are very different.

If you judge him to be immature yet agreed to be his fiancée then you should trust whatever it is that has influenced your decision.

WOULD YOU RATHER HAVE A MAN WHO DOESN'T CARE ABOUT FAMILY TIES? No, you wouldn't.

Furthermore, how would you know that she would move in with her son? That's anxiety. It won't happen. Just be positive about it. Remember the bond you share with him is only romantic. Nothing more at least for now. But the bond between him and his mom is "Kinship": a very strong bond developed over the years.

Try not to give your man stress over this issue. You will be married soon then you will be the woman of the home.

deebee13:
This is a really troubling issue for me, and I need mature advices pls.

My fiance and I have bin dating for the past two years, and our wedding date is fixed,but there's a problem...He is too attached to his parents,like a little child. it amazes me that he doesn't seem to see what it's doing to our relationship.


I want him to be a man, and stand on his own. I had to talk and talk before he moved out of their house,nd get a place of his own. Now he goes to their place every week, de call him almost everyday, and he does same. I really love him,cos he's a good man, but this is one thing I can't cope with. Pls Wat do I do about this?

maybe the parents e protectin him from u coz u a gold diggggger. . QUESTION?....

...r u dak skin?...YES!

....r u dak nigerian?...YES!

...ru only interested in his wealth?...YES!

. . .u plan to use all his salary to by Brazilian wig?...YES!

.... Do u plan to cheat later. ..YES!

...and do u plan to trap him as soon as possible?..HELL YES SIR!!


....^^^ ther u go...u ansad * YES* to all the question....meanin the parents shud keep him far far far away from u (no ofeeense)

MzPreshie:
Sounds like he's an only child or son, they are always like that. You just have to bear with him, I believe once he gets his own family and children, he will set his priorities right. At least, he's a good man.

Start eating kwiliwkili he will stop

U mean, he should forget his folks cos his now married to u? .....NO right? What da Bleep do u want from the nigga? My mum s gonna stay wit me.........any bitch that dont want should find her level!

deebee13:



Hmmmmn,he is not an only child. He's d second child out of 4kids. I get Wat you're saying dear, I just worry about those issues people leave unsettled until marriage. But I'm hoping dis one works. Thank u!

You're welcome. Hope it works too.

MrCork:

And where's the gold here? Would've been good for a change if you make sense for once.

MzPreshie:
And where's the gold here? Would've been good for a change if you make sense for once.

^^^ther u go againn...typikal dak skin female...u catch them out & they start cussin innnosent citizen for no reason...

....and then they complain they can find man on nairaland!

MrCork:





maybe the parents e protectin him from u coz u a gold diggggger. . QUESTION?....

...r u dak skin?...YES!

....r u dak nigerian?...YES!

...ru only interested in his wealth?...YES!

. . .u plan to use all his salary to by Brazilian wig?...YES!

.... Do u plan to cheat later. ..YES!

...and do u plan to trap him as soon as possible?..HELL YES SIR!!


....^^^ ther u go...u ansad * YES* to all the question....meanin the parents shud keep him far far far away from u (no ofeeense)

Mr cork...honoured to have u on my thread,with ur usual comment!

deebee13:



Mr cork...honoured to have u on my thread,with ur usual comment!

..thanks sweeery.....r u light skin?

idu1:
U mean, he should forget his folks cos his now married to u? .....NO right? What da Bleep do u want from the nigga? My mum s gonna stay wit me.........any bitch that dont want should find her level!

I'm sure ur kind of girl out there,trust me there's a bitch for every SOB!

MrCork:



..thanks sweeery.....r u light skin?

Sorry dear, dark meat!