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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / Husbands Who Demand Their Wives Submit Their Salaries To Them (39285 Views)
Why Do Most Educated Women Find It Very Difficult To Submit Their Husbands / Should Wives Submit To Their Husbands? / Husbands Who Beat Their Wives (2) (3) (4)
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Re: Husbands Who Demand Their Wives Submit Their Salaries To Them by dre11(m): 10:55am On Nov 05, 2014 |
lahit14: Am not an apostles of military approach as u did said...... But don't u think a man as to do what he believes is the best for his family If the wife doesn't know how to manage financial aspect of it and he believes that the best way to crub it Have seen a lot of marriage crumbling because of money management Where one is prudent and the other is lavish So if the husband is a prudent type let her roll with it Atleast in 9ja of today most families don't live on their salary alone.. ... So her other source of income can cater a bit for that But Let everything be done in moderation |
Re: Husbands Who Demand Their Wives Submit Their Salaries To Them by Nobody: 10:58am On Nov 05, 2014 |
kibi: I dnt know why people didnt see this part of your post. He is demanding for her salary for one reason and one reason only: To show her submissiveness. Hmm. Men who always ask for things to be done simply to show submissivenness are found out to be abusive emotionally, verbally and physically ooooooooo. The "Submissive" word is their favorite. Most abusive stories involved men stripping their wives of finances so that they can be fully dependent on them. such men believe that once a woman is stripped off finances, she will become powerless and easy to control. Such men are not mentally stable!! Nigerian women, open your eyes!! I don talk my own. 4 Likes |
Re: Husbands Who Demand Their Wives Submit Their Salaries To Them by bimbos2007: 12:41pm On Nov 05, 2014 |
men like your brother Cutehector4u: 1 Like |
Re: Husbands Who Demand Their Wives Submit Their Salaries To Them by lahit14(m): 1:36pm On Nov 05, 2014 |
dre11: I see ur points bro, I neva said u were appostl military though, yes a moni lavishn wife is not one anybody prays for. Just sayin it shouldn't be tied to thr gettin back togethr, somtin of an ultimatum, if she doesn't comply, they say goodbye's? Not good. Remembr thr marriage already hav bruses given their seperation, if eventually she budges, marriage will be sour, since she wouldn't be submittin her month salary wit joy. I knw thr r times a man should tak a firm decision for the family but humans hav evolved, peopl don wise toomuch, u can still carry it out in a bettr way whr it would be win win for evry1. |
Re: Husbands Who Demand Their Wives Submit Their Salaries To Them by josite: 1:51pm On Nov 05, 2014 |
if u decide you are a christain and wants a christain marriage,then submitting your salary should not be a big deal where you whole being itself is already submitted to the husband as christ enjoins all women who will have a xtain marriage to do. if however you elect a society marriage with trends dictated by the society or a civilised marraige with trends disctated by civilisation then submitting yourself and your money is wrong and no husband should ask any wife to do that in that context. so the first question is what type of marriage are they into. african marriage and christain marriage actually expects the wife to submit herself and everythig she has to her hubby and thats the source of the joy of these marriages as opposed to BB MARRIAGES whre the hubby will be sleeping and the wife is sending her naked pictures to toasters via whassaps.,bb. define the marriage before you enter,please and save yourself trouble.AM FOR AFRICAN MARRIAGE. 2 Likes |
Re: Husbands Who Demand Their Wives Submit Their Salaries To Them by lahit14(m): 1:57pm On Nov 05, 2014 |
dre11: |
Re: Husbands Who Demand Their Wives Submit Their Salaries To Them by lahit14(m): 2:00pm On Nov 05, 2014 |
dre11: I see ur points bro, I neva said u were appostl military though, yes a moni lavishn wife is not one anybody prays for. Just sayin it shouldn't be tied to thr gettin back togethr, somtin of an ultimatum, if she doesn't comply, they say goodbye's? Not good. Remembr thr marriage already hav bruses given their seperation, if eventually she budges, marriage will be sour, since she wouldn't be submittin her month salary wit joy. I knw thr r times a man should tak a firm decision for the family but humans hav evolved, peopl don wise toomuch, u can still carry it out in a bettr way whr it would be win win for evry1. |
Re: Husbands Who Demand Their Wives Submit Their Salaries To Them by LYNDDY(f): 2:55pm On Nov 05, 2014 |
what a pity, I have an uncle like that(was saving up money to start his own business ), his wife earns 70k every month and he uses her atm to withdraw the money every month immediately the salary is paid. And she is cool with it , cos he manages the money well in running the house. The money is use for rent ,feeding and for their son. But now he has started his own business and am not sure if he still collects his wife's salary. Personally I will not try it, I really don't care what he says, I can contribute to the upkeep of the house but surrendering 100% of my salary is a big NO! |
Re: Husbands Who Demand Their Wives Submit Their Salaries To Them by owabige: 3:33pm On Nov 05, 2014 |
I might not knw wat their marital problem is,I am a married woman and I also work,wat I do at every month end is to set out a budget with my husband for the household..for example if we have to buy certain things that d house nids we share the out come 60-40.so that the both parties can also have some money to sort out their personal problems and transportation to wrk.its all about understanding and communication..so I really think that those couple nids some counselling 1 Like 1 Share |
Re: Husbands Who Demand Their Wives Submit Their Salaries To Them by radicalove(f): 5:09pm On Nov 05, 2014 |
Elypsis: I'm happy that we still have reasonable men out there, y should a woman submit all her monthly salary to her husband? Even if it's charm, things do not work that way. My advise is for her to leave d bondage of a marriage before her money-sucking-demon sucks her dry and still end up divorcing her leaving her with nothing. To be fore warned is to be fore armed. If d man wants assistance, she can help out but not for her to submit everything. 3 Likes |
Re: Husbands Who Demand Their Wives Submit Their Salaries To Them by radicalove(f): 5:14pm On Nov 05, 2014 |
ayswags: So, only expenses should be shared abi?? What about house chores and childbearing?? Will that also be shared as well?? It is clear that what most men want from ladies is not just "sex" anymore, but "sex and money", too bad 2 Likes |
Re: Husbands Who Demand Their Wives Submit Their Salaries To Them by ZIMDRILL(m): 5:33pm On Nov 05, 2014 |
radicalove: child bearing throw it out why ? ask god to make men to start giving birth as for chores i dont see why do you have to share, once you use the word SHARE it means there is a problem in doing the chores i will give an example of my life here in UK my wive does long days (aka 12 hour shift) 3 times a week so when am off when she doing a long day i cook, clean the house and do the laundry this is helping my partner, imagine this, she goes to work 12 hours 8 am - 8pm cames back and start to cook and clean the house by the time she goes to bed i would want sex, she would be tired like real a slave and that affect the sex our life and her physical body the best thing is to help her by making her rest, just like our fathers used to do, go to work came back home and bathing water would be ready and food then the next day he is fresh for work, women too need to rest after a day at work this can be done by doing other chores, by the time she come back from work she wont have to do much and the rest of the time she would resting its high time african men learn to help wives in the house especially if she goes to work chores are not meant to do a duty but as everyday work to keep the house clean and also to be done as helping your other partner take rest it would be a different story if the women is just housewive 4 Likes |
Re: Husbands Who Demand Their Wives Submit Their Salaries To Them by Shirley07: 5:51pm On Nov 05, 2014 |
josite:Is there any neurone cell in your brain? Strange creatures everywhere! |
Re: Husbands Who Demand Their Wives Submit Their Salaries To Them by Shirley07: 5:53pm On Nov 05, 2014 |
josite:Is there any neurone in your brain cell? Strange creatures everywhere! 1 Like |
Re: Husbands Who Demand Their Wives Submit Their Salaries To Them by radicalove(f): 6:25pm On Nov 05, 2014 |
guass: No such thing as "HER SALARY" in marriage, but there is something like "HIS SALARY" in that same marriage? So unfair! 2 Likes |
Re: Husbands Who Demand Their Wives Submit Their Salaries To Them by GoodFaith: 9:14pm On Nov 05, 2014 |
ojiefi:You sound ignorant and uneducated What is a family? I am nice but I need to be a b NO man should take over all family expense If you have a wife, Please "men" make her contribute She have to have a stalk in the married The husband and wife money MUST always be the family's money We work for the need of our family Women are having good education today and some women make more money than man We have to be reasonable and sensible 2 Likes |
Re: Husbands Who Demand Their Wives Submit Their Salaries To Them by Elypsis(m): 9:22pm On Nov 05, 2014 |
radicalove:that's exactly the way it should be ma'am 2 Likes |
Re: Husbands Who Demand Their Wives Submit Their Salaries To Them by miqos02(m): 12:43pm On Nov 06, 2014 |
kibi:advice her to play the fool for three months by submitting the salary and see how it goes. how come the man knows her exact salary |
Re: Husbands Who Demand Their Wives Submit Their Salaries To Them by Godmystrength: 2:04pm On Nov 06, 2014 |
miqos02:isn't he suppose to know?? |
Re: Husbands Who Demand Their Wives Submit Their Salaries To Them by cap28: 3:33pm On Nov 06, 2014 |
This set up of a man asking his wife to submit her salary to him is a clear cut case of abuse and control. This can only happen in a society where men are allowed to get away with abusing women and of course Nigeria is such a society. Don't get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with a wife helping to pay bills and contribute to the running of her home, but to ask her to submit her salary to her husband as if she is mentally retarded and incapable of running her own affairs is simply exploitation and abuse. This type of scenario normally happens in a situation where the the woman was desperate to get married to the man and feels that without the man she has no life, if such a man knows this he will abuse the situation and start making unnecessary demands on the woman. Therefore women should realise that marriage is not a do or die affair but merely a union between two people who love each other and intend to help raise and nurture a family together, it shouldn't be used as a means of exploitation. Men who engage in this type of behaviour are usually the type of men who married for ulterior motives for example in the US a lot of Nigerian men import young women from poor family backgrounds over to the US, they get them to work as nurses and then insist that the money these women make is "submitted" to them every month for "projects back home", the woman effectively becomes modern day slaves to this man's demands and any attempt to break out of such a set up is met with extreme anger and violence from the men - is that what marriage is all about? would any man wish his sister to undergo such treatment at the hands of any man? To say that the man does this in order to "help" the woman manage her finances is a major insult and slap in the face to Nigerian women as I see Nigerian women as some of the most hardworking and industrious women out there, the average Nigerian woman juggles her personal career with the raising of her children and does a good job at it, come to the west and you see western women who do not cook and prefer to go out clubbing with their female friends rather than stay home with their husband and kids. Ask any western woman to submit her salary to you each month and see whether that marriage will be in existence the next day. Some women in the west even divorce their husbands as soon as he loses his job not to talk of asking her to submit her salary to you every month. I have sisters and would never stand by and watch any of their husbands make such demands on them. 4 Likes |
Re: Husbands Who Demand Their Wives Submit Their Salaries To Them by Nobody: 8:41pm On Nov 06, 2014 |
ThoniaSlim: [img]https://www.tumblr.com/search/laughing+gif[/img] The gif is not even showing |
Re: Husbands Who Demand Their Wives Submit Their Salaries To Them by Nobody: 8:58pm On Nov 06, 2014 |
cap28: Wow, I am very impressed. You should make more posts in the family section. |
Re: Husbands Who Demand Their Wives Submit Their Salaries To Them by tintingz(m): 9:10pm On Nov 06, 2014 |
Why must she submit her salary? That's not submission but controlling. Her salary is hers and she will contribute as the wife not submitting salary to a man like a teenager. Husband is the provider of the house, wife is to assist the hubby not submitting her salary. 2 Likes |
Re: Husbands Who Demand Their Wives Submit Their Salaries To Them by Ugo201: 9:50pm On Nov 06, 2014 |
I wonder why in the first place a woman would keep her earnings away from her husband. My own parents as teachers of old had one purse. It appears there had been problems associated with this issue, that is why the narrator was saying that it was a condition for the couple to make up. Where the marriage is a priority to a lady, this should not be a problem but where the self and ego is, then there will be issues even beyond the submission of salaries. Ladies, please SUBMIT your husbands in everything. That is spiritual, as it is also traditional in the African setting. No lady who has submitted has not got the LOVE of her husband in return. Many ladies know thier RIGHTS so much that in pursuing the rights they loose them and get no sympathy at the end. If u cannot tolerate the nonesense of a man/woman, do not go into marriage in the first place but that does not include INSURBODINATION from a woman. LOVE for the woman is required of the man and SUBMISSIVENESS is required of the woman and one comes before the other, and that is SUBMISSIVENESS. 1 Like 1 Share |
Re: Husbands Who Demand Their Wives Submit Their Salaries To Them by ChynoBEATS: 10:32pm On Nov 06, 2014 |
ocheu:. As-in ehn that's absolutely barbaric....... Imagine after the whole stress she's hz been tru..... Goin n comin 4rm wrk.... Washin , n cookin hiz meals ...... She'll now tender ALL_____ nt all o______ But ALL "every single penny" as-in ALL to thÍs incompetent d,Íck HEAD she calls a hubby.... She'll just Commit suicide After 2mths.... 2 Likes |
Re: Husbands Who Demand Their Wives Submit Their Salaries To Them by ChynoBEATS: 10:51pm On Nov 06, 2014 |
[quote author=Ugo201 post=27789137]I [quote author=Ugo201 post=27789137]I wonder why in the first place a woman would keep her earnings away from her husband. ______what Ñonsence___ can u jst hear ur'sef.......??.....in this present generation U'on Do such...... Y wÓnt u keÉp it 4rm him ??...... I swear u sounÐ so D=U]mB My own parents as teachers of old had one purse. Oh they had One purse...... I bet ur parents weren't Rich nor even Leaving a comfortable live....... Cos u sound lyk a person who's brain has been soaked in poverty...... §ee rubbish wey dis one dey type sef........... Ur pa®ents had one purse ....Had Ít been ur parents whr As rich do u tink dey'lld be doing such??.... it was a condition for the couple to make up. Wat non sence Condition______A condition that I'm 100% sure iz becos of EnVy ........ please SUBMIT to-your husbands in everything. Sorry pleÀse don't mis- qoute the bible ehn...... Ogini sef..... Becos it wz said doesn't mean she should do so in Everytin she does....... Or hv u 4got'n that We'r all equal creÀtions??....... ...... |
Re: Husbands Who Demand Their Wives Submit Their Salaries To Them by ChynoBEATS: 11:00pm On Nov 06, 2014 |
repogirl:abeg my sister tell dem O........ 4dis current generation u dey put eye 4ur wife salary..... nobi say he even talk say make she dey assist , the Lame Head wan collect everytin........ The man in question lacks training .... N I'll blame her 4 marrying such'a frustrated n!qqar 3 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Husbands Who Demand Their Wives Submit Their Salaries To Them by ocheu(f): 1:49am On Nov 07, 2014 |
ChynoBEATS:suicide no be small |
Re: Husbands Who Demand Their Wives Submit Their Salaries To Them by Nobody: 3:43am On Nov 07, 2014 |
kibi: I consider myself a submissive wife but I don't joke with my money Mba nu When it comes to money,my eyes are wide open Ladies listen,by the time a man tells you to submit and submit your paycheck,he is crossing a line You help foot bills and contribute to projects but for me to go to work everyday and work my fingers to the bone and at the end of the month,take all my paycheck and give you? A na m ayi ara ? God forbid bad thing 2 Likes |
Re: Husbands Who Demand Their Wives Submit Their Salaries To Them by Nobody: 3:50am On Nov 07, 2014 |
beeevan: Do you know what husbands like that do They suck the woman dry,some trick them to even cash and submit their retirement savings and 401k I have seen that with my korokoro eyes Even to buy pad,you will be begging for your own money The marriage will eventually crash because bloodsuckers like that never get enough ,they suck and suck and control every move,your friends,they cut you away from your loved ones and isolate you to suck you to death until she decides to flee and she is left penniless Any man that says the marriage must not be peaceful till you give him 100% of your pay check is not of God and must be resisted like the devil himself 3 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Husbands Who Demand Their Wives Submit Their Salaries To Them by Nobody: 3:52am On Nov 07, 2014 |
kibi: Because that is his way of control Once he strips her of financial freedom,she is undone. |
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