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A Nairaland Girl Narrates Her Ordeal In Her Abusive Relationship - Romance - Nairaland

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A Nairaland Girl Narrates Her Ordeal In Her Abusive Relationship by Nobody: 3:25pm On Nov 16, 2014

.....I'm writing this with tears in my heart, My relationship has not been quite stable like every other girl here, I'm 27 years my bf is 35 we have been dating for 7 years now

we met in ekosodin, uniben when I went to visit my elder sister who was schooling there then, I'm a graduate of industrial biological science from unilag.

our relationship has not really been that stable, but my pain today is that I just came back from church where one of my friends just did thanksgiving for successful wedding

all my mates have gotten married and I'm the oldest among them, each time I ask him about it he will say the time is not yet

I'm tired, do you think I should break up? because he doesn't seem to be ready and I'm getting old

I have a very comfortable job, he is also working and earning well.

please advice your fellow nairaland sister
angry angry

1 Like 1 Share

Re: A Nairaland Girl Narrates Her Ordeal In Her Abusive Relationship by Nobody: 3:32pm On Nov 16, 2014
Guyss shaa Very soon now you will receive the invitation card,he will strt by telling you,u ar outta fashion,u lookin old.I fink u shuld talk to him about it,and xplain vry well,and if he doesn't shw any intrest in the topic,my dear,find ur way.b4 hin go use and dump u.
Re: A Nairaland Girl Narrates Her Ordeal In Her Abusive Relationship by Babygal4eva(f): 3:38pm On Nov 16, 2014
You are still giving him an option... personally I don't put much stock in the whole Marriage institution cause I think it's just a piece of paper that can be made void with another paper, but you do so stop giving him options and tell him that either he puts a ring on it or he should stop wasting your time. If you love him though then you should be patient and accept him as he is maybe he doesn't blv in marriage too so talk it out.
Re: A Nairaland Girl Narrates Her Ordeal In Her Abusive Relationship by Ambrogio(m): 3:38pm On Nov 16, 2014
Space bought for 1USD
Re: A Nairaland Girl Narrates Her Ordeal In Her Abusive Relationship by chimerase2: 3:41pm On Nov 16, 2014
The thunder dat will fire sombori dis sunday is eating ngbadume with zobo angry

5 Likes

Re: A Nairaland Girl Narrates Her Ordeal In Her Abusive Relationship by Nobody: 3:41pm On Nov 16, 2014
Babygal4eva:
You are still giving him an option... personally I don't put much stock in the whole Marriage institution cause I think it's just a piece of paper that can be made void with another paper, but you do so stop giving him options and tell him that either he puts a ring on it or he should stop wasting your time. If you love him though then you should be patient and accept him as he is maybe he doesn't blv in marriage too so talk it out.

badoolee:
Guyss shaa Very soon now you will receive the invitation card,he will strt by telling you,u ar outta fashion,u lookin old.I fink u shuld talk to him about it,and xplain vry well,and if he doesn't shw any intrest in the topic,my dear,find ur way.b4 hin go use and dump u.

...Thanks my lovely sisters
Re: A Nairaland Girl Narrates Her Ordeal In Her Abusive Relationship by isaiahethan: 3:42pm On Nov 16, 2014
Quit the guy,7yrs is not 7 days.but where you engage with him ?
Re: A Nairaland Girl Narrates Her Ordeal In Her Abusive Relationship by Nobody: 3:49pm On Nov 16, 2014
you are weeping because he has not done the right thing. I even thought you were beating by your boyfriend when I first saw the topic. mtchewwwww. you better don't use another person's time to judge yours. assuming u are married to him and he beats you every day you will come to Nairaland to narrate your story as well. get a life lass and go try another person if u like.

1 Like

Re: A Nairaland Girl Narrates Her Ordeal In Her Abusive Relationship by Nobody: 3:52pm On Nov 16, 2014
I don't understand why you will be wasting your time with a guy that clearly doesn't want to take you serious,
Are you telling yourself (not us) that you can't meet other men to date?
Are you not beautifull enough?
Confident about what you want?
You've finnished with university, you're employed and earning well, even your guy is as well.
But he says he's not ready, probably its becos he's dating other ladies, or he's just not ready to settle for reasons best known to him.
But my opinion is
He's being selfish and insensitive to your feelings, your biological timing and just feels since you're not going anywhere he can do whatever he wants.
Another opinion is maybe you are the problem, maybe you just want the 'I'm married, MRS ' title more than you love him,
Maybe he's seen you as desperate and therefore predictable, and men don't like to be pushed and rushed into things (most especially commitment) they aren't ready to do.

So sister abeg! Look before you leap,
Ask your guy why he's not ready, whatever reply he gives you would help you decide the next step,
Pls pls and pls upgrade yourself, I mean by other projects that will occupy your mind and increase your intellectual thinking mindset, and upgrade your appearance even though you look great presently (I no mean bleaching o) I mean inwards o. And have it in mind he is not the only educated working man in in nigeria or the world.

And finally I will recommend you get and read this book 'why men marry BITCHES' av forgotten the name of the author.


Sorry my 2cents are unarranged
Re: A Nairaland Girl Narrates Her Ordeal In Her Abusive Relationship by stinggy(m): 3:53pm On Nov 16, 2014
Marriage is just too overrated. No single day without many marriage topics on NL undecided undecided
Re: A Nairaland Girl Narrates Her Ordeal In Her Abusive Relationship by arsetalks(m): 3:54pm On Nov 16, 2014
Is he financially stable for marriage? When you say your relationship him is not stable, how do you mean not stable?

He cheats or has cheated? Those questions are important if you want help.
Re: A Nairaland Girl Narrates Her Ordeal In Her Abusive Relationship by Nobody: 3:57pm On Nov 16, 2014
wilsondave:
you are weeping because he has not done the right thing. I even thought you were beating by your boyfriend when I first saw the topic. mtchewwwww. you better don't use another person's time to judge yours. assuming u are married to him and he beats you every day you will come to Nairaland to narrate your story as well. get a life lass and go try another person if u like.

....are you single? I wanna mingle!!
angry angry
Re: A Nairaland Girl Narrates Her Ordeal In Her Abusive Relationship by Nobody: 4:01pm On Nov 16, 2014
[size=30]...Mod FrontPage pls
angry angry [/size]

1 Like

Re: A Nairaland Girl Narrates Her Ordeal In Her Abusive Relationship by sammieguze(m): 4:03pm On Nov 16, 2014
Excuse me...... Do you know the meaning of abusive
Re: A Nairaland Girl Narrates Her Ordeal In Her Abusive Relationship by Nobody: 4:05pm On Nov 16, 2014
Yungwizzzy:


....are you single? I wanna mingle!!
angry angry

am not ready for gay marriage cause I know for real that you are a guy not a female OK. by the way am single but I get girls around me.

1 Like

Re: A Nairaland Girl Narrates Her Ordeal In Her Abusive Relationship by acenazt: 4:07pm On Nov 16, 2014
Yungwizzzy:

.....I'm writing this with tears in my heart, My relationship has not been quite stable like every other girl here, I'm 27 years my bf is 35 we have been dating for 7 years now

we met in ekosodin, uniben when I went to visit my elder sister who was schooling there then, I'm a graduate of industrial biological science from unilag.

our relationship has not really been that stable, but my pain today is that I just came back from church where one of my friends just did thanksgiving for successful wedding

all my mates have gotten married and I'm the oldest among them, each time I ask him about it he will say the time is not yet

I'm tired, do you think I should break up? because he doesn't seem to be ready and I'm getting old

I have a very comfortable job, he is also working and earning well.

please advice your fellow nairaland sister
angry angry

hello dear shey u get job,oya I go marry u. on one condition. u go relocate to Kaduna
Re: A Nairaland Girl Narrates Her Ordeal In Her Abusive Relationship by sainty2k3(m): 5:35pm On Nov 16, 2014
Pls, what exactly is 'Abusive' in ur relationship, the guy ain't truly ready for marriage or he's not convinced U'll be the best or him, u choose to stay.
Re: A Nairaland Girl Narrates Her Ordeal In Her Abusive Relationship by JOETYNO: 5:48pm On Nov 16, 2014
Sambisa dey wait U.



Deceiving ur head with ur moniker(f), buh guy U be gay?
Re: A Nairaland Girl Narrates Her Ordeal In Her Abusive Relationship by Nobody: 5:54pm On Nov 16, 2014
JOETYNO:
Sambisa dey wait U.



Deceiving ur head with ur moniker(f), buh guy U be gay?

please respect rule 2
Re: A Nairaland Girl Narrates Her Ordeal In Her Abusive Relationship by JOETYNO: 6:04pm On Nov 16, 2014
Yungwizzzy:


please respect rule 2


hahaha, y disrespecting rule 8 and 11?
Re: A Nairaland Girl Narrates Her Ordeal In Her Abusive Relationship by Nobody: 8:20pm On Nov 16, 2014
WEGT

Re: A Nairaland Girl Narrates Her Ordeal In Her Abusive Relationship by andyanders: 8:47pm On Nov 16, 2014
Yungwizzzy:

.....I'm writing this with tears in my heart, My relationship has not been quite stable like every other girl here, I'm 27 years my bf is 35 we have been dating for 7 years now

we met in ekosodin, uniben when I went to visit my elder sister who was schooling there then, I'm a graduate of industrial biological science from unilag.

our relationship has not really been that stable, but my pain today is that I just came back from church where one of my friends just did thanksgiving for successful wedding

all my mates have gotten married and I'm the oldest among them, each time I ask him about it he will say the time is not yet

I'm tired, do you think I should break up? because he doesn't seem to be ready and I'm getting old

I have a very comfortable job, he is also working and earning well.

please advice your fellow nairaland sister
angry angry


Walk out of the relationship because there is no normal human being that would be in the position he is and still dating at that age.

Listen, he has no love for you as he is secretly looking for a younger lady while using you.

It will be better you call off the relationship as no responsible man can do what your so called man friend or whatever you call him is doing.

This is the time for you to open your eyes and get off from the relationship. He has seen everything about you and nothing to feel when you are not there.

I look forward to hearing from you and seeing your new/next post here that you have found your true life partner.

If it is a curse on him not to marry someone whom he has been with for good 7yrs, it is not your own portion because you have a life to live.

God who created you in His own image would also get you off from him and give you a man who will appreciate and love you EVER than any man you have been with. My prayer today is that whatever that is holding you not to marry must die for you to marry who God wants you to marry. Just be prayer and ask God for His direction on this.

A deceitful man is not God's plan for you. I use this forum to also advise ladies against going into a long term relationship because it is ONLY the woman who stand at the receiving end. You have to be smart to know when a man or guy is not ready. Six months to a year is enough for you to understudy any person. Be it a man or a woman to know what you can do in case you start discovering things along the line. As a lady, you must define what you want in a relationship before you go into it and once things are not working right, get out of that relationship because some men has no God's fearing heart as they can decide to look for a younger lady once they have seen all about you and maybe you must have committed abortion many times from him.

Ladies, be wise.

1 Like 1 Share

Re: A Nairaland Girl Narrates Her Ordeal In Her Abusive Relationship by Nobody: 9:23pm On Nov 16, 2014
andyanders:


Walk out of the relationship because there is no normal human being that would be in the position he is and still dating at that age.

Listen, he has no love for you as he is secretly looking for a younger lady while using you.

It will be better you call off the relationship as no responsible man can do what your so called man friend or whatever you call him is doing.

This is the time for you to open your eyes and get off from the relationship. He has seen everything about you and nothing to feel when you are not there.

I look forward to hearing from you and seeing your new/next post here that you have found your true life partner.

If it is a curse on him not to marry someone whom he has been with for good 7yrs, it is not your own portion because you have a life to live.

God who created you in His own image would also get you off from him and give you a man who will appreciate and love you EVER than any man you have been with. My prayer today is that whatever that is holding you not to marry must die for you to marry who God wants you to marry. Just be prayer and ask God for His direction on this.

A deceitful man is not God's plan for you. I use this forum to also advise ladies against going into a long term relationship because it is ONLY the woman who stand at the receiving end. You have to be smart to know when a man or guy is not ready. Six months to a year is enough for you to understudy any person. Be it a man or a woman to know what you can do in case you start discovering things along the line. As a lady, you must define what you want in a relationship before you go into it and once things are not working right, get out of that relationship because some men has no God's fearing heart as they can decide to look for a younger lady once they have seen all about you and maybe you must have committed abortion many times from him.

Ladies, be wise.

lipsrsealed shocked :oq
Re: A Nairaland Girl Narrates Her Ordeal In Her Abusive Relationship by Nobody: 6:33am On Nov 17, 2014
lipsrsealed
Re: A Nairaland Girl Narrates Her Ordeal In Her Abusive Relationship by adepiero: 6:44am On Nov 17, 2014
Yungwizzzy:
[size=30]...Mod FrontPage pls
angry angry [/size]

If this fiction enters FP, make cow lay egg undecided
Re: A Nairaland Girl Narrates Her Ordeal In Her Abusive Relationship by izsmike: 8:18am On Nov 17, 2014
u see yungwizzzy as the op's moniker and u dare give advice... una get plenty mb sha
Re: A Nairaland Girl Narrates Her Ordeal In Her Abusive Relationship by Houseofglam7(f): 8:36am On Nov 17, 2014
Oh pulizzzzzz.


I didn't wanna say anything, coz of the moniker but I felt some persons would learn from it........




If you find yourselves in a relationship that's leading nowhere, QUIT!!!!
Besides,all relationships shouldn't end in marriage!
Learn,move on!
Re: A Nairaland Girl Narrates Her Ordeal In Her Abusive Relationship by andyanders: 10:14am On Nov 17, 2014
Houseofglam7:
Oh pulizzzzzz.


I didn't wanna say anything, coz of the moniker but I felt some persons would learn from it........




If you find yourselves in a relationship that's leading nowhere, QUIT!!!!
Besides,all relationships shouldn't end in marriage!
Learn,move on!

You are right. People should be reasonable enough to decode a bad partner and quit the relationship on time. How can you be in a relationship with someone who is working and you are working too and he kept telling you that he is not set for marriage and you keep hanging in with him?You should be the first to run because the woman suffers most than the man.
Re: A Nairaland Girl Narrates Her Ordeal In Her Abusive Relationship by Houseofglam7(f): 11:49am On Nov 17, 2014
andyanders:


You are right. People should be reasonable enough to decode a bad partner and quit the relationship on time. How can you be in a relationship with someone who is working and you are working too and he kept telling you that he is not set for marriage and you keep hanging in with him?You should be the first to run because the woman suffers most than the man.



My point exactly!
Well done!
Re: A Nairaland Girl Narrates Her Ordeal In Her Abusive Relationship by spiralwedge(m): 12:54pm On Nov 17, 2014
@op, you are on your own o. And must you marry?
If you must marry, find someone else now!

The only thing I can read between the lines is that you shouldn't marry him and if you do, it may be rocky because you are forcing him to go into what he is not ready/fit to do.
Re: A Nairaland Girl Narrates Her Ordeal In Her Abusive Relationship by MadCow1: 12:56pm On Nov 17, 2014
Yungwizzzy:

.....I'm writing this with tears in my heart, My relationship has not been quite stable like every other girl here, I'm 27 years my bf is 35 we have been dating for 7 years now

we met in ekosodin, uniben when I went to visit my elder sister who was schooling there then, I'm a graduate of industrial biological science from unilag.

our relationship has not really been that stable, but my pain today is that I just came back from church where one of my friends just did thanksgiving for successful wedding

all my mates have gotten married and I'm the oldest among them, each time I ask him about it he will say the time is not yet

I'm tired, do you think I should break up? because he doesn't seem to be ready and I'm getting old

I have a very comfortable job, he is also working and earning well.

please advice your fellow nairaland sister
angry angry


So what is abusive about this?! angry
Re: A Nairaland Girl Narrates Her Ordeal In Her Abusive Relationship by Nobody: 2:27pm On Nov 17, 2014
MadCow1:


So what is abusive about this?! angry

look between the lines

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