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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / How To Tolerate Cheating Husband. (73720 Views)
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Re: How To Tolerate Cheating Husband. by Nobody: 2:42pm On Nov 18, 2014 |
I can understand if you want to tolerate him until you are absolutely certain he is cheating. However, I cannot understand how you would admit you are unhappy yet willing to overlook and excuse his cheating because "men cheat". Yes, give him time to change if you wish, but is there any indication he even wants to change? Why should you tolerate what you did not vow to do upon marriage? I think you need to know it is not true that all men cheat. Some men cheat. Yes most men are tempted, but that goes for women too. Forever is the longest amount of time to ask an individual to stay faithful to one person for; it's never easy. But a true tragedy is when a person waits forever to be loved by one person who is loving elsewhere and never looks back. 3 Likes |
Re: How To Tolerate Cheating Husband. by Nobody: 2:44pm On Nov 18, 2014 |
All men are like legend of the seeker...they will keep seeking till they are old and tired; so long as their financial wallet is in tact; ladies have that in mind or don't marry!! All financially buoyant married men cheat, oya make una stone!!! 2 Likes |
Re: How To Tolerate Cheating Husband. by Yemsweet: 2:48pm On Nov 18, 2014 |
Nawa o....seems ds is d trend of this married men nowadays. .. its well.. kindly do what you think is best for u.... |
Re: How To Tolerate Cheating Husband. by Nobody: 2:49pm On Nov 18, 2014 |
Flytefalls:take it or leave it sister, all sexually active men cheat!! And same, all financially buoyant married men cheat! Once a man tastes that forbidden fruit, he will keep exploring more forbidden fruits cos the one he has tasted will become sour in his tongue and he wants to taste new ones. A married man can only remain faithful if he has no money, struggling financially and lack the opportunity due to certain factors, aside that, all married men cheat!! If u like, keep arguing it. The best u ladies can do is to also start cheating so we can have a peaceful world, simple!! With what u ladies are putting on about, and how ladies love money and material things and give buoyant men green and even blue lights, how do u ladies expect a man to stick to one woman who over time stops looking attractive/sexy to him Blame it on nature and women pls 4 Likes 1 Share |
Re: How To Tolerate Cheating Husband. by caesaraba(m): 2:50pm On Nov 18, 2014 |
Some men can just do stupid things sha. I pity men who can't just keep it on their pants. OP, I suggest you guys sit down and talk openly about what happened a little bit more and then seek counselling to help resolve raised issues. Please don't go cheating as way of paying back. You'd only be hurting yourself more. At all at all, if/when you decide to leave the marriage (I hope not), there'd be enough time to date and have intimate relations without having that sour taste in your mouth after done deeds. |
Re: How To Tolerate Cheating Husband. by Nobody: 2:50pm On Nov 18, 2014 |
baybiemee: Seriously? Says who? You can't be so sure for anyone. How can you advise her to keep calm and play the fool. Some men would feel guilty and change, but majority would think the woman is a big glad fool and continue. I doubt you'd do same if it were your husband cheating. |
Re: How To Tolerate Cheating Husband. by caesaraba(m): 2:51pm On Nov 18, 2014 |
DailyNews: All generalizations are false; including this one. 8 Likes |
Re: How To Tolerate Cheating Husband. by lastmessenger: 2:52pm On Nov 18, 2014 |
happywife:My only advice is always sleep with him with condom. If you be my sister I will say divorce him( even God won't be angry with you) but since you hate divorce then you can tag on hoping that one day he will change. Again always sleep with him with condom.forget std test. |
Re: How To Tolerate Cheating Husband. by Mettal: 2:54pm On Nov 18, 2014 |
Take heart and be strong,not because of your current dilemma,but because of the impending predicament,handle it like a pro,. 99 % of husband with fat pocket would always cheat sometimes even no matter his religious standard,please live with it,hard truth is we are all thence. On a side note., |
Re: How To Tolerate Cheating Husband. by lacord5: 2:54pm On Nov 18, 2014 |
happywife: |
Re: How To Tolerate Cheating Husband. by dmz(m): 2:55pm On Nov 18, 2014 |
yeyenatu: *Shivers* Gosh Well we all have our way of dealing with things sha.. 4 Likes |
Re: How To Tolerate Cheating Husband. by iykedare(m): 2:55pm On Nov 18, 2014 |
remsonik: Are you afraid of HIV? Do naija women fear HIV? Since when? Make them see money or the outline of a black mamba and see them strip within a sec. Hiv ko. |
Re: How To Tolerate Cheating Husband. by Mettal: 2:56pm On Nov 18, 2014 |
Take heart and be strong,not because of your current dilemma,but because of the impending predicament,handle it like a pro,. 99 % of husband with fat pocket would always cheat sometimes even no matter his religious standard,please live with it,hard truth is men are all like that. On a side note., surprisingly,some women don't see that as a headache because they've embraced the truth. Shift the attention to your kids,don't throw the stick on him,always love him and hopefully his eyes would clear BUT that cannot stop him from cheating but would remind him to put his family first. |
Re: How To Tolerate Cheating Husband. by Nobody: 2:56pm On Nov 18, 2014 |
Op confront him peacefully. Tell him you feel very bad about his actions, pour your heart out peacefully. And see his reactions, if he apologises and promises not to do it again. You should try and forgive him. If he denies it and acts nonchalant towards your cries, start deciding if it's worth it again( I mean, being his wife). Deciding if it's worth it depends on if you even have kids with him or not. If confronting him peacefully doesn't work, you might wanna confront him aggressively. Some men only hear when you show them you're angry. Your reaction should depend on your husbands s response and after a careful measurement of the things that make your marriage worth it. Sorry you're experiencing this. 1 Like |
Re: How To Tolerate Cheating Husband. by lacord5: 2:58pm On Nov 18, 2014 |
Darling your husband seems to have extra cash in his pocket all the time, money make men cheat! They have enough to hang out, pay for hotels, take care of their new babes etc. Now he is able to do all that cos you have a good job and probably shoulder half of your family responsibilities, believe me if he were broke (I don't mean unemployed oh) and thinking of saving up money for children's school fees and rent and insurance, he won't have money left for extravagances. Now solution... Change your kids schools, take them to a better and more expensive school, tell him their old school is now crap and it's a good investment to their future, be all nice and sweet while talking about this . Then, where do you live? A rented house? You need to get a land and start building, tell him how real estate is the new rave and a good investment too, look for a land and get him see the need to have his own house, by the time he starts building every kobo will go into it, be supportive too, show interest and always hang by him. If you already have a house, build more for rent and as an investment. Again it may be hard but show him love, forgive him in your heart, be an active member in your church and get him to become one too, if you don't have a nanny please get one, hang out with him and those his friends and slowly get him to hang with you, be a buddy. Don't report him anymore to anyone, don't claim to be too tired to go to parties and clubs please go with him, listen to gospel teachings it will ease your pain. DO NOT CHEAT BACK! It is your body, you won't like to desecrate yourself just cos he is doing so, you will feel worse. And it won't solve anything at all. Stop cutting cost, get those things your family lack, don't wait anymore, get him to spend his money, start projects and don't stop... And moreover pray for him to change, don't underestimate the power of prayer and money 13 Likes 4 Shares |
Re: How To Tolerate Cheating Husband. by Nobody: 2:58pm On Nov 18, 2014 |
caesaraba:if una like, make una come here to pretend, lie, etc to deceive ladies and give them false hope....all I know is as u guys log off, u face the reality. Fashion, media (movies, musical videos, product adverts, etc), internet social media networks, etc have spoilt the world...everywhere u go, sex appeal is being used as a selling point...ladies dress provocative here and there, even at corporate offices, banks, churches, martkets, shopping malls, cinemas, etc and u expect a man who has enough to accomodate waste to be faithful to one lady who may have slept with over 10 different men before getting married, I say- NO WAY sir!!! Cheating amongst men can never stop so long as women keep loving money and falling for material things, bling bling, etc and u know it. |
Re: How To Tolerate Cheating Husband. by Nobody: 2:59pm On Nov 18, 2014 |
happywife: Madam dont even consider paying him back in his own coin cos it might tear u down more. If you can't bear it, do a dipper research and once u confirm it above just a guess report to his pastor if he goes to church and everybody that has a stake in ur marriage. Dont open ur legs for him for at least 6month and get ur own room. If he must do there must be a condom. |
Re: How To Tolerate Cheating Husband. by Nobody: 3:01pm On Nov 18, 2014 |
lacord5:tell them! Small boys still struggling financially won't understand what u wrote shaa...let them wait until they get money. Well done guy |
Re: How To Tolerate Cheating Husband. by iykedare(m): 3:01pm On Nov 18, 2014 |
fuzzywuzzy: so what will you do |
Re: How To Tolerate Cheating Husband. by Nobody: 3:05pm On Nov 18, 2014 |
evegran:lol, the problem married women have is single ladies and the problem is: every married woman was once a single lady, get that Cheating is inherent in every man, they only need more money to become full blown cheats |
Re: How To Tolerate Cheating Husband. by Nobody: 3:07pm On Nov 18, 2014 |
happywife: Please don't join him in the show because there is a reward for what he is doing (judgment day), i don't mean to insult you, it would be foolish of you to start what your husband is doing , the issue of adultery its a serious matter, people involved their selves as a result of ignorance and they forgot that the penalty is far more than pleasure. Look at this! After an extermination and the results is been released, what mod do you see between those that pass and those that failed and which one did you wish to belong? Will you want to fail because of someone who deliberately refused to read? Think wisely and make a choice! |
Re: How To Tolerate Cheating Husband. by Nobody: 3:08pm On Nov 18, 2014 |
Another regular cheating thread? Gosh! Are we going to run away from this family section for you people? Please come back with more stimulating topics like " my husband's mistress drives a Benz and I am hopping okada" " my husband hasn't give me HIV yet,what should I do"" "My husband's third mistress gave birth to triplets and I am yet to carry belle" " where in mile 2 can I buy authentic otapiapia for my husband " " I just shot my cheating husband ,am I a widow" 9 Likes |
Re: How To Tolerate Cheating Husband. by Nobody: 3:10pm On Nov 18, 2014 |
DailyNews: I noticed your comments on the issue. My wonder now is, why are you now forcefully dragging my attention to your thoughts on the issue? Even after you clearly stated your thoughts already. ? 3 Likes |
Re: How To Tolerate Cheating Husband. by rita25(f): 3:13pm On Nov 18, 2014 |
my dear i understand with you oh....my case is even worse,my husband barely regards me and wenever i say i want to quit the marriage he comes begging....i haVE seen txt msg,hotel reciepts and even aknowldgement of money deposits into bank accounts for other chicks oh.....am more tired than you....but trust me just keep strong someday it will all end in praise..... |
Re: How To Tolerate Cheating Husband. by Nobody: 3:13pm On Nov 18, 2014 |
90% of nigerian women are stewpid 12 Likes |
Re: How To Tolerate Cheating Husband. by Rhozabeth(m): 3:14pm On Nov 18, 2014 |
bennyrazz: Reporting him to anybody will not solve any problem, if anything it will aggravate the situation! She said she has reported him b4, what has come out of that? My advice, see a counsellor! So that u don't become an emotional wreck! |
Re: How To Tolerate Cheating Husband. by baybiemee: 3:14pm On Nov 18, 2014 |
evegran: Just as u said some will feel guilty. What if her husband is one of those that will feel guilty? Isn't it worth a try? Well, the OP sounds as if he is irredeemable, so what am I even saying? |
Re: How To Tolerate Cheating Husband. by Emmalot121(m): 3:15pm On Nov 18, 2014 |
happywife:It is in the natural nature of men to sleep with as many women as possible. If you pay him in his own coin, you are only giving him an avenue to cheat more, if you divorce him, I assure you that he can marry another woman the next day, leaving you with the '2nd hand' stigma. Wore off is the fact that you will have to contend with the weight of being a single parent and a very high possibility of not having another husband. Call him and iron it out. If you see that he can't change, allow him to have sex, regulated by you, which must be well protected and occasional. If you really wish to continue staying under the protection of a man, just submit to his will, and pray for him to come back home. Nigeria is strictly patriachal. Remember, if you throw a stone in a market, it might just hit your relative. The best way to overcome temptation is by falling to it wisely. Thanks. |
Re: How To Tolerate Cheating Husband. by Nobody: 3:18pm On Nov 18, 2014 |
baybiemee: Well, her reaction should just be based on his response. |
Re: How To Tolerate Cheating Husband. by Nobody: 3:18pm On Nov 18, 2014 |
jennykadry: Where are you from? Australia? 1 Like |
Re: How To Tolerate Cheating Husband. by bukatyne(f): 3:18pm On Nov 18, 2014 |
jennykadry: jenny don vex That is what they saw their mothers do so what do you expect? Tomorrow their children will ask the same questions. 2 Likes |
Re: How To Tolerate Cheating Husband. by Nobody: 3:19pm On Nov 18, 2014 |
nairaman66: If what you see is bashing then sorry im not responsible for however you choose to understand my comment. Dnt bother quoting me. |
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