jennykadry:
90% of nigerian women are stewpid

happywife:
Thanks 4 all d info advice guys i ve decided since my husband has adopted d married but living single life i will do same. 2 can play this game.may d best man/woman win .


m out.

happywife:
I need advice on how to cope with a cheating husband.

I have always suspected that my husband was cheating on me but confirmed it recently when i found some condoms were missing from our home n his bank statement showed payment for a hotel when i was away on a short trip .when i confronted him his stories ranged from his friend took it to i was mistaken in my counting n to i went to the room but changed my mind n left without doing anything. but his behaviour showed he was sorry for about 2 weeks then back to normal. problem now is i cant bring myself to trust him n my love for him is reducing daily.when he comes home late from work or doesn't take my calls all i can think about is that he is with another woman. To be honest it's killing me slowly cos i find myself calling him n quarrelling with him constantly.

I dont think i can leave him cos he cheated on me cos lets face it most men do i just need advice on how to cope with my emotions cos i m soo unhappy n its affecting every area of my life . Sometimes i feel like paying him in his own coin but i m a one man kind of babe.

I just want to concentrate on my kids now but how do i cope with being suspicious all d time n being jealous n bitter n a whole lot of emotions thats killing me.

happywife:
I need advice on how to cope with a cheating husband.

I have always suspected that my husband was cheating on me but confirmed it recently when i found some condoms were missing from our home n his bank statement showed payment for a hotel when i was away on a short trip .when i confronted him his stories ranged from his friend took it to i was mistaken in my counting n to i went to the room but changed my mind n left without doing anything. but his behaviour showed he was sorry for about 2 weeks then back to normal. problem now is i cant bring myself to trust him n my love for him is reducing daily.when he comes home late from work or doesn't take my calls all i can think about is that he is with another woman. To be honest it's killing me slowly cos i find myself calling him n quarrelling with him constantly.

I dont think i can leave him cos he cheated on me cos lets face it most men do i just need advice on how to cope with my emotions cos i m soo unhappy n its affecting every area of my life . Sometimes i feel like paying him in his own coin but i m a one man kind of babe.

I just want to concentrate on my kids now but how do i cope with being suspicious all d time n being jealous n bitter n a whole lot of emotions thats killing me.

I dont care how you do it.


But my own is that you should drag him to the hospital and both of you should get checked out for STD's..


You may also need to find some activities outside your kids to keep you pre-occupied and happy.


#Goodluck in your marriage.. E no easy at all..

naijababe:


Where are you from? Australia?

bukatyne:

jenny don vex
That is what they saw their mothers do so what do you expect?
Tomorrow their children will ask the same questions.

rita25:
my dear i understand with you oh....my case is even worse,my husband barely regards me and wenever i say i want to quit the marriage he comes begging....i haVE seen txt msg,hotel reciepts and even aknowldgement of money deposits into bank accounts for other chicks oh.....am more tired than you....but trust me just keep strong someday it will all end in praise.....

Nekk:
Madam, I must say that we are in the same shoes, I read your stories over and over again to be sure I wasn't the one that typed it.
Am so following this story because it will help me heal, I feel myself dying slowly of pain. God men are mean.

happywife:
I need advice on how to cope with a cheating husband.

I have always suspected that my husband was cheating on me but confirmed it recently when i found some condoms were missing from our home n his bank statement showed payment for a hotel when i was away on a short trip .when i confronted him his stories ranged from his friend took it to i was mistaken in my counting n to i went to the room but changed my mind n left without doing anything. but his behaviour showed he was sorry for about 2 weeks then back to normal. problem now is i cant bring myself to trust him n my love for him is reducing daily.when he comes home late from work or doesn't take my calls all i can think about is that he is with another woman. To be honest it's killing me slowly cos i find myself calling him n quarrelling with him constantly.

I dont think i can leave him cos he cheated on me cos lets face it most men do i just need advice on how to cope with my emotions cos i m soo unhappy n its affecting every area of my life . Sometimes i feel like paying him in his own coin but i m a one man kind of babe.

I just want to concentrate on my kids now but how do i cope with being suspicious all d time n being jealous n bitter n a whole lot of emotions thats killing me.

roWzayy:
Im in d same shoes as well.my hubby is a cheat in disguise he claims to love me but yet still cheat,when I was pregnant he went outside to sleep with anoda girl I found out thru his chat with his friend imagine how many he might have slept with wen I had my baby n d process of trying to heal back#d worst is dat d men he hangs out with re all cheating on their wives*my fear now is when will he stop and my prayer is let him not come n infect me with std or Hiv(God forbid)

jennykadry:


I am stateless and countryless



I have given up on cheating thread since last year. I am not prepared to go through the long epistle again lest I give myself high blood pressure.

I grew up with a father who told me each time that I should see myself as a woman a man will Be lucky to have and not vice versa and back in the day, many nigerian men did not understand this. I was called rude and arrogant. Even my uncle once told me that no man will marry me with my I TOO KNOW....

I think leaving the shores of Nigeria has helped shape the lives of many nigerian men. You can tell sometimes when you are having a discourse with a nigerian man in Nigeria and nigerian man in diaspora......educated ones I mean. I'm not trying to be rude but I spend atleast a minimum of 6 weeks in Nigeria everyday and I can tell the difference

Katier00:
why are you calling me names, you just heard the woman, she wants to start xtra marital affair because her hubby is doing so, that is not life, why not leave , fall in love again and maybe that will be the right man instead of cheating

happywife:


Thanks every1 for ur comments .

U r on point on the quoted sections this all started with late nights and too much porn at the time my fear was it will lead to adultery which it has. I have a great paying Job n not dependent on him but pretend to so as to appear submissive.I look great if i should say so.I m more than capable of takin care of my kids by my self.I have confronted him and reported to family so too late for that. i guess i am just angry cos the general advice seems to be men cheat just pray he will change thats why i decided to come here for advice. d pain n hurt cant just disappear i guess what i need to know is how to deal with it.how to ignore wat his cheating is doing to me.

presently i have asked for a std n hiv test before sleeping with him without protection. its d emotional part i need help with.

babyosisi:


A good friend of mine says women in Nigeria are not empowered mentally
I think to myself sometimes and wonder if I would be this wimpy and needy living in Nigeria and I say no looking at my mother

bemyguest:
Men make up is cheating whether married or not. I will do same to my husband. As he did not think about my feelings while indulging himself.

DeeMain:
Ma'am, you appear intelligent and good so I'm going to address u as one.

Your options are not A or B as you've made it seem. Have you had a showdown or open communication talk with him? Have u gone to pastors, counsellors or coaches/therapists? I purposely used plurals ma. Have you drawn boundaries with him and kept them if he crossed them? Have you asked him what's missing in your marriage now that's making him want to ruin everything? Have u told him the cost? Have you told him how deeply you are hurting and asked him where he is hurting in your marriage with a view to both of you retracing your steps?

Note: I have listed these few options believing you are a good commnicator or will learn how to before you talk with him.

My point is Smart people know that options are not just 2, they are actually many. List your options, work through them. If nothing else works, which I doubt, since you said he is a good man, then you can come to other 'risky' options. Till then try to save it first before destroying it as you are planning to.

I say No to cheating by either men or women. I only gave u this advice because you are the party looking for a solution. If your husband was the one who posted seeking for help, my advice would be different.

dmz:


*Shivers* Gosh

Well we all have our way of dealing with things sha..

DrGroove:

Your advice would have been: SEND HER PACKING!!!!!

Sweetlemon:
Reading through comments here I can't help but laff my asss off.

I just want to believe that all these girls forming "I can't tolerate cheating" here are just forming internet feminist warriors.

Una eye go open when you marry. The more successful your hubby is, the more women he will have around him. Just pray to marry someone that will love and respect you enough to keep it far away from you and compensate you well enough that you don't feel the pain.


Even broke assses sef dey cheat. The only difference is the frequency. Stay dere.............


My advise? marry someone that will be worth the headache and after your wedding, know ye that you are now his madam. Forget about the rest of the world and face your work. Leave the rest to God and trust me, you will be very happy!

Cheers!

jennykadry:


The worse part is when you notice that even the educated ones are the most oppressed. After all the money their parents spent on their okpolor heads to give them that which should empower them, they still choose to act like eediots.

My father's very good friend has only one daughter. She is in the UK doing her PHD. Do you know that this girl's father was discouraged by many of his friends not to encourage her to study for her PHD? Why? Because no man would want to marry her....she is too educated..let her get married .....bla bla bla

yeyenatu:
its just true. We all have our ways. No shivering necessary.


YYN

happywife:


please leave God out of these matters.

happywife:


Thanks every1 for ur comments .

U r on point on the quoted sections this all started with late nights and too much porn at the time my fear was it will lead to adultery which it has. I have a great paying Job n not dependent on him but pretend to so as to appear submissive.I look great if i should say so.I m more than capable of takin care of my kids by my self.I have confronted him and reported to family so too late for that. i guess i am just angry cos the general advice seems to be men cheat just pray he will change thats why i decided to come here for advice. d pain n hurt cant just disappear i guess what i need to know is how to deal with it.how to ignore wat his cheating is doing to me.

presently i have asked for a std n hiv test before sleeping with him without protection. its d emotional part i need help with.

happywife:
Thanks 4 all d info advice guys i ve decided since my husband has adopted d married but living single life i will do same. 2 can play this game.may d best man/woman win .


m out.

happywife:
I need advice on how to cope with a cheating husband.

I have always suspected that my husband was cheating on me but confirmed it recently when i found some condoms were missing from our home n his bank statement showed payment for a hotel when i was away on a short trip .when i confronted him his stories ranged from his friend took it to i was mistaken in my counting n to i went to the room but changed my mind n left without doing anything. but his behaviour showed he was sorry for about 2 weeks then back to normal. problem now is i cant bring myself to trust him n my love for him is reducing daily.when he comes home late from work or doesn't take my calls all i can think about is that he is with another woman. To be honest it's killing me slowly cos i find myself calling him n quarrelling with him constantly.

I dont think i can leave him cos he cheated on me cos lets face it most men do i just need advice on how to cope with my emotions cos i m soo unhappy n its affecting every area of my life . Sometimes i feel like paying him in his own coin but i m a one man kind of babe.

I just want to concentrate on my kids now but how do i cope with being suspicious all d time n being jealous n bitter n a whole lot of emotions thats killing me.