I just saw this article

Reasons why good manners could give good relationship
And I decide to share here

There are many good reasons why your parents spent years instilling all those manners into you, and it isn’t just so you don’t embarrass them in public. That’s right: Your parents knew something about relationships that they may not have even realized and that is that good manners equal good relationships.

Let me give you an example. Have you ever watched an old sitcom like “Father Knows Best” or “The Donna Reed Show?” Did you ever notice how polite the husband and wife are to each other? That isn’t just TV magic or fifties housewife gender roles; it goes much deeper than that. The reason those sitcoms show such good behavior is because good manners are vital to a long and healthy relationship. Here’s why.

#1 You Maintain Respect for Each Other

One of the problems in many relationships is that people lose respect for each other. There isn’t always an outside cause either. Often people lose respect for each other because they get so comfortable that they go outside the boundary of what’s okay and what isn’t.

Have you ever been in a relationship with a man who was very polite and considerate when you first got together, but then as things moves along and he became more comfortable he…changed? He began burping at the dinner table or farting in front of your friends and laughing about it. Maybe he even stopped putting the toilet seat down or putting his dirty dishes in the sink.



#2 You Appreciate Each Other

Another reason why good manners are important in a relationship is that good manners mean you continue to appreciate each other. When you and your partner say, “Please” and “Thank you” on a regular basis, you show each other that you still appreciate what the other person does for you.

When he opens the door for you, he shows you he still appreciates you as the lady you are, and when you say “Thank you,” you show him that you still appreciate his little acts of chivalry that make him who he is. Appreciation and good manners go hand in hand.



#3 The Kindness Never Goes Away

Have you ever seen those couples who argue all the time over petty little things? Maybe one of them says something rude and the other retaliates so they bicker back and forth eventually becoming cruel to one another? That’s another reason why good manners equal a good relationship.

It’s difficult to be kind to someone who doesn’t respect or appreciate you, and when you have bad manners there’s nothing there to respect or appreciate. In other words, you can’t be kind to someone who’s cruel, you just can’t. I know what you’re thinking: Bad manners doesn’t necessarily equate to cruelty. That’s true, but bad manners never equates to kindness either.



#4 It Prevents Petty Arguments

When you see those couples having those petty little arguments, do you ever feel a little embarrassed for them? I know I do. If they can talk to each other like that in public, who knows how they speak to each other at home. It’s uncomfortable to watch to say the least.

However, those petty arguments that happen behind closed doors are also, undoubtedly, uncomfortable. More importantly, they’re easily preventable. One of the biggest complaints I hear women have is that their husband “never appreciates” the things they do. Women tell me all the time they wish they could get a simple “Thank you” for cleaning the house, or a “Wow, this is great” for cooking dinner. Without those manners, women (and men) feel unappreciated by their partner. That lack of appreciation leads to small, often spiteful, arguments.



#5 You Set an Example for Your Children

Why are those old black and white sitcoms considered so wholesome? They set good examples for the children. Let’s look at it from a child’s point of view for a moment. Now, even if you don’t have kids, bear with me because someday you might have children and this information will be very useful.

Children learn what they live. They also learn from what they see around them. Many kids spend hours upon hours in front of the television


#6 It Still Feels “New”

Not only do good manners keep the respect in a relationship and help to prevent petty arguments, but good manners also makes the relationship continue to feel like new. I implore you once again to go back to those early days of dating when saying “Please” and “Thank you” was expected. Do you remember how good you and your man felt about each other when you were using your manners? Yeah.

Whenever you and your guy keep up the good manners, the relationship keeps that “new” feeling. You know, the one where you thought he was Prince Charming and he thought you were an absolute angel! Good manners is one of the things that keeps you “in love” with each other (because you don’t build up those little resentments towards each other).



#7 Your Families Appreciate it

Does your man have one of those hard-to-please mothers? Does your father hate your guy for stealing away his little girl? If the answer to either of those (or both of those) questions is “yes,” then your good manners are highly needed to ease the parenting pain.

When you show your significant other’s parents that you’re well-bred and that you were raised to show respect and courtesy to people, those parents are going to want to keep you around. That’s because they know that good manners are hard to find nowadays, and they also want to make sure that the apple of their eye doesn’t run off and marry some jerk (male or female). Believe me, nothing shows a parent you love their child more than being respectful, kind, and showing that you were raised with good manners.



#8 Good Manners are Classy

It isn’t just your parents that you want to show off those manners to; your friends also need to see them! Have you ever invited couples over for a game night or a few drinks and dinner? Have you ever seen any of those couples start arguing in front of everyone? It gets awkward real quick, doesn’t it?



#9 It Gives the Relationship Equality

One of my biggest pet peeves is when I see a couple walking down the street and one of them walks in front of the other without even turning back. I really hate that. I also hate it on a date. It’s rude to be with someone and walk ahead of them. Even more horrendous is when the man is walking in front of the woman and doesn’t stop to hold the door open for her (I’ve been on more than one of these dates). It’s shameful to act that way!

When you apply your manners, you are creating an equal balance in your relationship. Two people who are polite and appreciate each other will always go the extra mile and make sure the other person is right beside them (literally and figuratively speaking). Anything less is not good for a relationship.

#10 You’re Happier with Each Other

All in all, when it comes down to it, good manners equal a good relationship because you’re happier with each other. Think about it? Could you ever really be truly happy with someone who isn’t good to you? Could you ever really feel complete with a person who doesn’t respect you and doesn’t appreciate you? No, you can’t. There’s no sense trying to pretend.

When it comes to using good manners, it’s not only good for your relationship it’s actually one of the most vital aspects of your relationship.

Copied from

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So I ask if you think that good manners does make a relationship between a man and his wife works and better



Or it's just one of those things that is hyped about good manner making a relationship work.
And do you guys believe that a good manners is not an ingredient to make a relationship better

But I think some ladies just prefer rude guys to ofter ones and will prefer having relationship with such.

Based on my little experience and exposure. I ll say being in a perfect or good relationship is only by luck. What if the good behavior or manner is one-sided? Do you think a perfect relationship will exist?

To experience a good relationship, there must be a balance. It must not be one-sided. Both parties must have the required manners to make things work out well.

eph12:
But I think some ladies just prefer rude guys to ofter ones and will prefer having relationship with such.

What is your definition of rude because it's relative. So, what makes them wanted by the women you so said.

Mzgracie:
Based on my little experience and exposure. I ll say being in a perfect or good relationship is only by luck. What if the good behavior or manner is one-sided? Do you think a perfect relationship will exist?

To experience a good relationship, there must be a balance. It must not be one-sided. Both parties must have the required manners to make things work out well.

So you are saying that both parties have to exhibit that good manners for the relationship to work.

But, what about this the saying that like poles repeal and unlike poles do attract. Is that not applicable to relationship.

dre11:


So you are saying that both parties have to exhibit that good manners for the relationship to work.

But, what about this the saying that like poles repeal and unlike poles do attract. Is that not applicable to relationship.

That's the part where always get confused. That's why I said relationships is only a game of luck. The lucky ones meet people of like minds. While the unlucky ones meet those who doesn't appreciate their worth. Personally, I can't go for someone I know we are not compartible.

Using Mizmycoli's recent thread as reference, I ll only say we should not settle for less. Sometimes we might be lucky to influence the other partner with our good manners.

Good manners are certainly a good example for kids, but if you are married to an unfeeling man, then no amount of good manners will help.

chival:
Good manners are certainly a good example for kids, but if you are married to an unfeeling man, then no amount of good manners will help.

I did understand what angle you are coming from
But from the context of those post you failed to look at points number 1and 2
•Where it's talks about good manners helps to maintain respect for each other
And
• you appeciate each other

So, this to me has defeated your earlier statement of good manners just for the children because our parents install good manners to their children to make them better when they grow up

Mzgracie:



That's the part where always get confused. That's why I said relationships is only a game of luck. The lucky ones meet people of like minds. While the unlucky ones meet those who doesn't appreciate their worth. Personally, I can't go for someone I know we are not compartible.

Using Mizmycoli's recent thread as reference, I ll only say we should not settle for less. Sometimes we might be lucky to influence the other partner with our good manners.

That's the spirit
Never settle for less because their is no perfect relationship.......

The only aspirations one has is to make the relationship work and it's always a working in progress until one goes to the grave.....


So, which side of the divide do you stand according to good manner making a good relationship

dre11:


That's the spirit
Never settle for less because their is no perfect relationship.......

The only aspirations one has is to make the relationship work and it's always a working in progress until one goes to the grave.....


So, which side of the divide do you stand according to good manner making a good relationship

Hmmmmm... True words..



No relationship is perfect. We can't find a perfect partner with a perfect manner or behavior. And that we ll keep wrking in prgress till we die, even if he or she has good manners. Seriously, you made me realise another thing about relationships this night.

I can't say much about my relationship. It is more like an embryonic one, a developing one. As for the good manners and good relationship, we are trying our best.

Good manners is sure important in a relationship o!

Most Husbands lack good manners immediately after marriage

what I am so sure of is that, if your good mannerism does not extend to those outside your relationship, it will loose its foot hold in a short while

if he is gentle with u and rude to others
good to u and wicked to others
be sure your turn of those wickedness and rudeness will come to pass

Funny topic!
Marriage robs you of ALL GOOD MANNERS because it is a BATTLE OF WITS.
Good manners only comes into play WHEN NECESSARY!

OP!
Manner is a noun

BUT MANNERS IS A PLURAL NOUN. . . please, take note. . . .thanks!

http://www.bing.com/search?q=What+Does+Manner+Mean&FORM=R5FD

Good manners give rise to a good relationship, only if it is not one-sided or else the partner with good manners will grow weary of the relationship . There is no gainsaying the fact that, it is a necessary ingredient for a successful relationship. Both partners have to meet in the middle to make the relationship work. The caveat is (it should not be one-sided).

However, having good manners does not necessarily mean the relationship will be good. There are some couples who try to imbibe good manners in their relationship and yet their relationship is tempestuous.
So I will say, it involves a bit of luck.

And there are situations where only one partner has good manners and they are together till the end. That is not a good relationship though. It will put unneccessary strain on the good mannered partner.
You see......... A bit of luck also makes relationships.

All in all, it is different strokes for different folks.

tobechi74:
Most Husbands lack good manners immediately after marriage

Don't you think is both side of the divide. Because the husband can't just wake up one day and loose all its manners if their isn't some actions that did trigger it from the other half.

KanwuliaJara:
Funny topic!
Marriage robs you of ALL GOOD MANNERS because it is a BATTLE OF WITS.
Good manners only comes into play WHEN NECESSARY!

OP!
Manner is a noun

BUT MANNERS IS A PLURAL NOUN. . . please, take note. . . .thanks!

http://www.bing.com/search?q=What+Does+Manner+Mean&FORM=R5FD

Thanks for the correction.....
But I thought everyone understands his role in a marriage and the concern of the individual is how to play his/role well and not interfere with the other person because interference brings about the BATTLE OF WITS.

#just my thoughts

AfricanApple:
what I am so sure of is that, if your good mannerism does not extend to those outside your relationship, it will loose its foot hold in a short while

if he is gentle with u and rude to others
good to u and wicked to others
be sure your turn of those wickedness and rudeness will come to pass

How about those that are good to outsider and not to the better half.. ..

From the articles good manners comes from a good home training for those that are teachable. If u are teachable then it's somehow hard for that good manners not to ozz out from you like a perfume.

But, u did made some valid point from the emboldened

gidjah:
Good manners is sure important in a relationship o!

I feel so to when I tried to look at the points the article gave and juxtaposinng it to real life situation

Thanks for sharing your thoughts

Babe2sure:
Good manners give rise to a good relationship, only if it is not one-sided or else the partner with good manners will grow weary of the relationship . There is no gainsaying the fact that, it is a necessary ingredient for a successful relationship. Both partners have to meet in the middle to make the relationship work. The caveat is (it should not be one-sided).

However, having good manners does not necessarily mean the relationship will be good. There are some couples who try to imbibe good manners in their relationship and yet their relationship is tempestuous.
So I will say, it involves a bit of luck.

And there are situations where only one partner has good manners and they are together till the end. That is not a good relationship though. It will put unneccessary strain on the good mannered partner.
You see......... A bit of luck also makes relationships.

All in all, it is different stroke for different folks.

You made some valid statement.
About it not being one sided
About it working for some people
About a working and good relationships being as a result of luck.

good manners does give good relationship
it's just depend on who is giving and at what compromise is the giver and receiver ready to sacrifice for the relationship to work.






because of the highlighted points made by the op..... am sure it does help to strengthen the relationship and not a basis for it to grow

#my two cents

gidjah:
Good manners is sure important in a relationship o!

absolutely agree with you on that if both parties do understand each other


it helps to set boundaries and respect for each other

dre11:


So you are saying that both parties have to exhibit that good manners for the relationship to work.

But, what about this the saying that like poles repeal and unlike poles do attract. Is that not applicable to relationship.

let us not bring the law of physics into a relationship..... it doesn't work that way and it won't


relationship is between individuals and those law are between particles and non living things.


let both parties work their relationship for good and do make use of the manners which we presumed good that they did learn from their parents to make their relationship work

I don't think this is necessarily true. Good manners will definitely give rise to a polite and courteous relationship but not necessarily a good 1.
The fact that I am well mannered and courteous towards you doesn't mean i respect you. It could mean that i feel too refined and well bred to tell you exactly how annoying i think you are or how silly i think your ideas are. Consequently, the lady/man may end up tolerating her/his partner and growing a complex towards the partner and that's not a good relationship.

Good manners is good in a relationship but it is not sufficient in itself to give rise to a good relationship

Isk:
I don't think this is necessarily true. Good manners will definitely give rise to a polite and courteous relationship but not necessarily a good 1.
The fact that I am well mannered and courteous towards you doesn't mean i respect you. It could mean that i feel too refined and well bred to tell you exactly how annoying i think you are or how silly i think your ideas are. Consequently, the lady/man may end up tolerating her/his partner and growing a complex towards the partner and that's not a good relationship.

Good manners is good in a relationship but it is not sufficient in itself to give rise to a good relationship

Hum.. ...

Quote of the day.. ....
Good manners is good in a relationship but it's not sufficient to give rise to a good relationship

Islie:


let us not bring the law of physics into a relationship..... it doesn't work that way and it won't

relationship is between individuals and those law are between particles and non living things.


let both parties work their relationship for good and do make use of the manners which we presumed good that they did learn from their parents to make their relationship work

First emboldened.... Make some sence. ....

Second emboldened...... Just nodded my head in agreement to the salient words you just passed across

Islie:



absolutely agree with you on that if both parties do understand each other


it helps to set boundaries and respect for each other

it actually makes d respect for each other to grow and once respect is in high regards in a union ,then any trouble is easily defeated

samflexxy:
yea why not
Space officially booked
Hmmmm

Space Booker's
Una no dey tired ni

gidjah:
it actually makes d respect for each other to grow and once respect is in high regards in a union ,then any trouble is easily defeated

Concur with your assumptions..... This also did go well with the article

dre11:
So I ask if you think that good manners does make a relationship between a man and his wife works and better



Or it's just one of those things that is hyped about good manner making a relationship work.
And do you guys believe that a good manners is not an ingredient to make a relationship better

Good manners on both ends is what makes a relationship smooth

When you look at the characteristics of love, it is just good manners really