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Nairaland Forum / Entertainment / Literature / Poems For Review / I Wish (1797 Views)
I Wish To..... / I Wish The Truth Has A Tongue / A Wish (2) (3) (4)
I Wish by Nobody: 7:35am On Aug 29, 2013 |
I wish u were with me rite dis minute, cuddlin and holdin me as I sleep, I wish u were in my mind @ dis moment, ud have seen how ur image flow in torrents, I wish I can have u all to myself for eternity, but alas, its all a wishful thinkin in insanity, I wish I wish I wish, if wishes were horses beggars would ride but I don't want to wish for 2 much, since all my wishes will neva come true. ill just have to make one last wish which would have saved me from makin all dis wishes, and it simply is: a wish dat I'd neva met u, mayb it'll have saved me d truama of been a beggar. |
Re: I Wish by spenca: 9:01am On Aug 29, 2013 |
It is written in a prose like format , why dont you dichotomize it into stanza' |
Re: I Wish by SirJonse(m): 12:42pm On Aug 29, 2013 |
Nice 1. FoLlow d guy above advice on ur nxt. |
Re: I Wish by rattlesnake(m): 10:24pm On Sep 09, 2014 |
rozzay: I wish u were with me rite dis minute, cuddlin and holdin me as I sleep, I wish u were in my mind @ dis moment, ud have seen how ur image flow in torrents, I wish I can have u all to myself for eternity, but alas, its all a wishful thinkin in insanity, I wish I wish I wish, if wishes were horses beggars would ride but I don't want to wish for 2 much, since all my wishes will neva come true. ill just have to make one last wish which would have saved me from makin all dis wishes, and it simply is: a wish dat I'd neva met u, mayb it'll have saved me d truama of been a beggar.thank u for this poem.....I wanna be Ur e-lover |
Re: I Wish by Nobody: 10:35pm On Sep 09, 2014 |
rattlesnake: thank u for this poem.....I wanna be Ur e-loverAwwwww I'm speechless |
Re: I Wish by ROZZAYY(f): 12:28am On Dec 16, 2014 |
Joseph1832 |
Re: I Wish by Nobody: 12:46am On Dec 16, 2014 |
ROZZAYY:Sent. What happened to your former account? Ayamlaykorn |
Re: I Wish by ROZZAYY(f): 12:55am On Dec 16, 2014 |
laykorn:I deactivated. I can write poems too. Lolz, have like 3 tho I can't locate dem, just saw dis one. Is it nice? |
Re: I Wish by Nobody: 12:56am On Dec 16, 2014 |
ROZZAYY:Yeah its so awesome. So natural. Just arrange it in stanzas and you have a great poem! Ayamlaykorn |
Re: I Wish by ROZZAYY(f): 12:58am On Dec 16, 2014 |
laykorn:Blushing. Thank u dear. Tho am not an art student so I don't know anyfin abt stanzas. |
Re: I Wish by Nobody: 1:00am On Dec 16, 2014 |
ROZZAYY:Oh. I'll arrange this in stanzas for you. Tomorrow. Then you'll know how to do it. Ayamlaykorn |
Re: I Wish by ROZZAYY(f): 1:03am On Dec 16, 2014 |
laykorn:Ok great. Am grateful. |
Re: I Wish by Nobody: 1:08am On Dec 16, 2014 |
ROZZAYY:You've seen the mail? Ayamlaykorn |
Re: I Wish by ROZZAYY(f): 1:12am On Dec 16, 2014 |
laykorn:I've seen it on nland but it hasn't gotten to me on my device, happens like dat. Can't wait to see it. *smiles* |
Re: I Wish by Nobody: 1:36am On Dec 16, 2014 |
ROZZAYY:Don't get too optimistic. It was a rush job. Lol Ayamlaykorn |
Re: I Wish by ROZZAYY(f): 8:36am On Dec 17, 2014 |
Coming to this section reminds me of one person. He mesmerized me with poems, he culd write one in his sleep, abt anyfin and everything. So I tot to write dis for him. He is a very gud friend. Cc: ayamlaykorn. You came into my life like a joke Wanted to ignore you Before it dawned on me you You were sent by God You captured my heart with your words Where you came from, I knew not Comforting, inspiring and lifting words You spewed in lines. Though I have vague memories of you I can still remember How fast you were to compose those lines That always put a smile You are one of a kind when it comes to poetry Very gifted and talented I don't even know what to say about you I can only say that I miss you I will always remember your words Which put a smile on my face ******LORDHUGO******** |
Re: I Wish by ROZZAYY(f): 8:37am On Dec 17, 2014 |
Laykorn |
Re: I Wish by Nobody: 10:16pm On Dec 17, 2014 |
I wish u were with me right here this minute. Cuddling and holding me as I sleep. |
Re: I Wish by Nobody: 10:18pm On Dec 17, 2014 |
Wow! The poem for Lord Hugo is touching. Did you lose contact with him? Ayamlaykorn |
Re: I Wish by ROZZAYY(f): 10:25pm On Dec 17, 2014 |
[quote author=laykorn post=28975960][/quote] Awwwwww it looks lovely now. Thank u sir laykorn. Lord hugo, did u check his moniker. Hmmmmmmm I rily miss him. Veeey! |
Re: I Wish by Nobody: 10:32pm On Dec 17, 2014 |
ROZZAYY:Hmm. I just checked. Saw one of the poems. Lol He's still active anyway. Ayamlaykorn |
Re: I Wish by Nobody: 10:39pm On Dec 17, 2014 |
ROZZAYY:nice work; we are all learners. #KeepTrying |
Re: I Wish by ROZZAYY(f): 11:49pm On Dec 17, 2014 |
laykorn:Rily. Hmmmm. Thanks veeey, we r learners. Thank u sir laykorn! Joseph1832 how r u. |
Re: I Wish by ROZZAYY(f): 10:18am On Dec 19, 2014 |
The Light- a ballard(I think) Laykorn!! Everyday in heaven a light shines so bright dat d angels use it in praises 2 d creator, and d light helps so wel dat not even a corner is dark. Then one day God decides 2 find out from which part f his galaxy d bright light emanates from; lo and behold as he looked into his golden globe he caught sight f somethn extremely beautiful , he saw in d not 2 distant planet cald earth a woman whom he created from a certain man's ribs and they were stil in existence both born in d 80s and 70s respectively somwhere in d beautiful continent f africa precisely in a nation cald Nigeria, in d waterlogged city f lagos, in d serene town f ajah lived this beautiful couple whose LOVE sparked so bright dat it shone 2 heaven. The Creator smiled as he covered his globe raining blessins on them. Its an old poem I wrote some tyme ago 3 Likes 1 Share |
Re: I Wish by Nobody: 10:25am On Dec 19, 2014 |
ROZZAYY: lovely |
Re: I Wish by Nobody: 10:26am On Dec 19, 2014 |
ROZZAYY:Wow! The theme is so awesome! But to make it a ballad, we need to re-arrange it. First is that a ballad usually comes in a 3 line stanza with a rhyme pattern of AAB The 3rd line of every stanza is usually the same throughout the same, providing some kind of chorus for the poem. This might look hard, but its so so easy. But if you don't want to go through all the stress of a ballad, this is good enough for free verse! We just need to put into stanzas. You can do that can't you Lol Trying to decide your stanza pattern is one of the most interesting things in a poem. You can make it 4 lines per stanza, 5 lines, 3 lines. Even 2 lines. Try many ways and check which one looks most beautiful and organised to you. That's it. I can help change this into a ballad using this story on the weekend if you think it'll be too hard for you to do. I'll give some tips on how to make it easier too. Ayamlaykorn |
Re: I Wish by ROZZAYY(f): 10:27am On Dec 19, 2014 |
lilmaxfidel:Ayam blushing. Thanks cutie. Cc- laykorn!!!! 1 Like |
Re: I Wish by ROZZAYY(f): 10:29am On Dec 19, 2014 |
laykorn:Hmmmmm I don't just know how to do the verse thing. I just write as it comes. Pls help me sir. |
Re: I Wish by Nobody: 10:33am On Dec 19, 2014 |
ROZZAYY:Hehehe. You've just written free verse! But you remember the poem you wrote for lordhugo? It was in free verse with the perfect stanza organisation. Just organise this like you did that too. That's all. ROZZAYY, I have something to ask ROZZAYY, on my birthday, will you write me a poem Ayamlaykorn |
Re: I Wish by ROZZAYY(f): 10:38am On Dec 19, 2014 |
laykorn:Thank u sir. Hmmmmm wen is it sir, I will with all joy and gladness. |
Re: I Wish by Nobody: 10:45am On Dec 19, 2014 |
laykorn: Laykorn has refused to review my poems |
Re: I Wish by ROZZAYY(f): 8:11am On Dec 20, 2014 |
Laykorn when is ur bday. Morning sir |
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>>INDEPENDENCE DAY< A Strong Poem You Will Always Want To Read. / Acrostic poetry and other poems by kuye samueli / Through The Night
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