breadplanets:
Hello fam. Compliments of the season. Hmmm...... My big day was mixed with sorrow. My fiance's youngest brother died the morning of my introduction. He wasnt sick nothing. This is a boy i fell in love with the first time i met him. Im heartbroken. My fiance was crying as he was driving down to my place. I just cant understand what happenend. I just dont understand. Why?? My fiance's mom is my biggest concern now cos the boy was her handbag. Always with her. How will she cope? Inshort at times like this i dont know what to say. Im not happy at all. God knows why this had to happen cos i dont get it at all. Why??

LaShawn:
@ bread planet
My condolences. Please take heart...


@all
I'm So touched by all the advice. Thank you So much as you tried to allay my fears. I'm a lot better now.

The truth is that I never wanted whisking their brother away. I would never come in between him and his family. Maybe that is What they were scared of. But I just don't fancy the whole reporting isssh.

I have decided to talk to him about things Because it is his duty to protect me and to lay the foundation of How his people relate to me.

I'm cool with MIL. We've even told each other 'I love you' on phone. Our relationship grew to that point and I'm wondering why the others are trying to force What should be allowed to progress naturally. My friendships start very slowly But I end up having these same friends for years and years once the friendship is established.

Thank you all from the bottom of my heart.

@ bukatyne
No it is not that guy. That is not to say this guy doesn't have his own issues too. With my track record though, I have some measures on ground So I never become a victim of what I've been through before.

LaShawn:
And the guy is enjoying the relationship with my family. They've made him feel very welcome and he has no qualms with anyone.

The thing is, It's not just this uncle they are complaining to. They are making this complaints anywhere and everywhere and even to friends.
If it was such an issue, why not talk to me about it? Do you want to turn the tide of public opinion against me or What?

All in all, I wish I had read this thread in and out before delving into all this. Maybe I wouldn't have my expectations so high.

prissyluv:
He said wether alive or dad that nobody should accept my fiance.

alutacontinua:


what does this mean? And why did he say that?

alutacontinua:


what does this mean? And why did he say that?

prissyluv:

Alive or dead. He said so when making his point that the marriage is a NO for him.

alutacontinua:


All the reasons he gave are not tangible enough to lose a good man.
if in your heart, you know and believe that this is the man you wanna spend the rest of your life with, let your dad understand that you'll gladly remain single in his house forever if he stops you and you have to be damn serious about it! .


If there is any reason like your man has some attitude problems etc, then you mighr wanna re-consider.

prissyluv:

Thanks dear. Your words sounds encouraging. The fact is that they ve refused to see this man in question before rejecting him. Their believe is that another man who will love and give me happiness will come. Each time I thought in the angle of reconsidering,I always feel I will regret my actions all my life. My man has no attitude problem though he is not perfect.

alutacontinua:


All the reasons he gave are not tangible enough to lose a good man.
if in your heart, you know and believe that this is the man you wanna spend the rest of your life with, let your dad understand that you'll gladly remain single in his house forever if he stops you and you have to be damn serious about it! .


If there is any reason like your man has some attitude problems etc, then you mighr wanna re-consider.

eagleeye2:

For some reasons I have mixed feelings about this advice. what if she goes against her Father's wish and marry this guy, and something comes up in the future who will she turn to?
I think it's better she tries harder to convince her papa, but if she can't she should let go. Had I Known it's not a nice phrase.

alutacontinua:



Would I marry without the consent of my father? NO!


But if he gives me some boring reason why I cannot be with the person whom my heart chooses, he should better be ready to have me in his house for a reaaaaaallllllyyyyyyy long time! And he kukuma knows I mean what I say

breadplanets:
Hello fam. Compliments of the season. Hmmm...... My big day was mixed with sorrow. My fiance's youngest brother died the morning of my introduction. He wasnt sick nothing. This is a boy i fell in love with the first time i met him. Im heartbroken. My fiance was crying as he was driving down to my place. I just cant understand what happenend. I just dont understand. Why?? My fiance's mom is my biggest concern now cos the boy was her handbag. Always with her. How will she cope? Inshort at times like this i dont know what to say. Im not happy at all. God knows why this had to happen cos i dont get it at all. Why??

alutacontinua:


Or what if nothing comes up in future?
or what if she follows his advice and something still comes up?
If her parents had genuine reasons, it's a different case entirely! But they've not even met the said guy, it's just not fair on 2 people in love. She really doesn't wanna get stuck in a marriage when her heart is with another, she'll not be abke to forgive herself.

Would I marry without the consent of my father? NO!

frmglorytoglory:
Parental consent is very key before entering into a marriage. Parents see what we never can see when we are in love. Sometimes their reasons for rejecting an intended spouse may seem trivial but if you dig deep you will see that their fears are borne out of a genuine love for you.
Pray about this issue and ask that if there is no truth in their reason of refusal to accept him that there should be a change of heart by your parents before the wedding date draws close.
Its not wise to get married without the consent of ones parents.

eagleeye2:

For some reasons I have mixed feelings about this advice. what if she goes against her Father's wish and marry this guy, and something comes up in the future who will she turn to?
I think it's better she tries harder to convince her papa, but if she can't she should let go. Had I Known it's not a nice phrase.

prissyluv:

What if something comes up in the future with the person he thinks is best for me? Of cos he expects i run to him? Can he change a womanizer?can he change a man who doesnt care for his family,can he change a wife beater? People will say your family will fight for you if your husband start messing up but at the end of the day,they will either ask you to leave him or manage him.

I believe mistake one made is better than the one people pushed him/her to.
My people believes that I ve good character and educated and therefore will attract a good man. But the truth is,there are many good and educated ladies up to 30yrs without a husband and some ended up with bad husbands...

prissyluv:

But the truth is,there are many good and educated ladies up to 30yrs without a husband and some ended up with bad husbands...

CoCoLav:


Oh My God!!

I'm so sorry bread planet. This is so sad.

eagleeye2:

Please age is not reason enough to marry without parental consent. i have equally met good ladies who were way past there 30s and still married on their own terms.
My cousin sister is one. My very close and personal person is another. And they have their own kids now.
.
I have equally met or seen those who went into marriage with their supposed 'Mr Right' who can never do any wrong and later they confessed yo have made a error in judgment.