my hubby and i courted four years before we finally tied d knot,we are blessed with adorable 18month old daughter.
during the years we dated he had a fling with this girl which i got to know later he blame it on d devil and promise heaven on earth to stop i forgave him, the girl on d other hand kept calling and texting that he has destroyed her life and want to dump her begging and threating at d same time,and doesn't mind been second option till she proves her love for him calling him all sort of sweet names, i couldnt take it any longer i had to call her using my hubby phone to get a life and stop been desperate etc it finally dies down
until yesterday av been noticing my husband like a week now secretly recieves calls make sure am not looking at his phone when chatting which was not so before, so when i got back frm church yesterday he was already asleep with our baby i saw his phone by his side i decided to check it cos i know his password..
lo and behold he has reconnect with d same girl back calling her sweetheart and asking abt her whereabout and promise to send her money on monday...
i was so hurt and felt like hitting something on his head but i kept my cool and went to sleep
so after breakfast i decided to ask him abt it and to my surprised he denied it that he dont know what am talking about, and was even swearing for d girl... and went inside his room to change and went out... am confused pls advice needed

Men are polygamous by nature so kini big deal.

oh dear I feel ur pain. some men are just so wicked without a conscience. tell him to stop whatever extra marital affair he z having or u divorce him. but bfor u do that, pray for him.

Redoil:
Men are polygamous by nature so kini big deal.

Was expecting this.

Eiyaaa! So annoying

Thank God you didn't smash his head while he was vulnerable...just take things easy and try to talk things out wit him,pray and take every necessary action to save your marriage..whatever u do think of your lovely little daughter

All these people...., una no dey enjoy new year? I swear I no expect to see anybody here

All the long story means he's cheating. 80% of men cheat, tell him how u feel about his attitude, pray for him to change, that's all.

firstEVA:
All the long story means he's cheating. 80% of men cheat, tell him how u feel about his attitude, pray for him to change, that's all.

70% women cheat too...infact,their own is worst cos hubby may die from it..I bet no woman on this thread can swear she's never cheated on a man before during dating,courting,marriage..

Why I don't normally feel pity for women that complains about a cheating hubby is cos if you investigate the woman properlly,you'll be shocked that she might have also cheated sometimes in their relationship/marraige but the hubby didn't find out so it'll make her seem holy...everyday,we come across promiscous wives who will even want to turn this world upside down if she finds out her hubby is doing same..so,you should just stop crying foul.

Redoil:
Men are polygamous by nature so kini big deal.

from evidence dats not true..ma dear i hope u are working .put it in prayers.call him n ask him if he wants a family and a home.ask him if he loves u and ask him where does he c d family n how in d next ten years.uf he sees a future u dnt cos a marriage built on lies n cheating is bound to suffer .

chibic:
70% women cheat too...infact,their own is worst cos hubby may die from it..I bet no woman on this thread can swear she's never cheated on a man before during dating,courting,marriage..

Why I don't normally feel pity for women that complains about a cheating hubby is cos if you investigate the woman properlly,you'll be shocked that she might have also cheated sometimes in their relationship/marraige but the hubby didn't find out so it'll make her seem holy...everyday,we come across promiscous wives who will even want to turn this world upside down if she finds out her hubby is doing same..so,you should just stop crying foul.

re u married if yes den u will kno relationship n marriage has long ropes

Rosarie:
re u married if yes den u will kno relationship n marriage has long ropes

which one be long rope?...whatever it is,whether relationship or marraige,cheating is cheating!!..a lot women cheated so much on their bfs and fiance sef..and they slept with married men too and as far as I'm concerned,90% of the women that cheated during relationship,will still do it in marraige cos they are already used to it and they enjoy it...majority of them I know,cheats on their hubbies with their ex bfs in the early days of their marraige...maybe,by the time the ex bf will not be their and the hubby starts cheating,she will open threads to tell us how promiscous hubby is...
Like I said,due to what I've witnessed in real life,I don't pity women who are cheated on because most of them are guilty of same crime but they'll never admit!..don't trust any woman!!!

chibic:
70% women cheat too...infact,their own is worst cos hubby may die from it..I bet no woman on this thread can swear she's never cheated on a man before during dating,courting,marriage..

Why I don't normally feel pity for women that complains about a cheating hubby is cos if you investigate the woman properlly,you'll be shocked that she might have also cheated sometimes in their relationship/marraige but the hubby didn't find out so it'll make her seem holy...everyday,we come across promiscous wives who will even want to turn this world upside down if she finds out her hubby is doing same..so,you should just stop crying foul.

You sound like you know the OP before; why do you think she might have cheated on him before? Just for the record; women are more committed to relationship than men.

kemiola89:

You sound like you know the OP before; why do you think she might have cheated on him before? Just for the record; women are more committed to relationship than men.

and you think men are not committed too?...women who are always on dating sites flirting and looking for new lovers are also committed?..smh..

chibic:
70% women cheat too...infact,their own is worst cos hubby may die from it..I bet no woman on this thread can swear she's never cheated on a man before during dating,courting,marriage..

Why I don't normally feel pity for women that complains about a cheating hubby is cos if you investigate the woman properlly,you'll be shocked that she might have also cheated sometimes in their relationship/marraige but the hubby didn't find out so it'll make her seem holy...everyday,we come across promiscous wives who will even want to turn this world upside down if she finds out her hubby is doing same..so,you should just stop crying foul.

. Hmmm, are you speaking from experience?

@ chibic: I can confidently tell you that I have not cheated before, not while we were courting and not in our over 5 years of marriage so don't go making sweeping statements.

@Op: let your husband know you saw his conversation with said girl. Do it calmly. Tell him you are disappointed. Afterwards keep your cool. Do not show that you are hurt. Be happy, polite but slightly distant. Once he begins to feel insecure he'll do a 360 degree turn HOPEFULLY.

Above all remain prayerful and trust in God. He always comes through when you trust in him.

chival:
@ chibic: I can confidently tell you that I have not cheated before, not while we were courting and not in our over 5 years of marriage so don't go making sweeping statements.

then,good for you and your marraige..but people like that are very rare!...with what one experiences/witness everyday,you can't help but conclude that this is actually how it is!!

@chibic: nah, it may look that way but it isn't necessarily so. I still remember the shock I felt when a friend of mine said to me "...afterall we all cheat." The thing is the bad gets talked about so much that the good seems to dwindle into obscurity.

There are many good marriages and faithful couples out there.

chival:
@chibic: nah, it may look that way but it isn't necessarily so. I still remember the shock I felt when a friend of mine said to me "...afterall we all cheat."

now you see where I'm coming from...she's admitting to you cos she knew you can keep the secret but if her hubby does same,she'll tell the story in ways that'll make people call her saint..whatever,good ones are very rare..in todays world,women cheating has sky rocketed and its now a norm..still,this is why stories of cheating doesn't bother me cos I always have the feelings that she may be guilty too.

yet another thread on cheating husband. I'm beginning to think there is a smear campaign on nairaland especially in the family section to demonize men. I mean these posters create a nl account just in one day, create just one topic to talk about how their husband is cheating. I'm beginning to suspect some certain people are behind this foul play. Really I'm suspecting some people.

Are u sure u really went back to sleep..?
Are u sure u slept well...?

bennyrazz:
yet another thread on cheating husband. I'm beginning to think there is a smear campaign on nairaland especially in the family section to demonize men. I mean these posters create a nl account just in one day, create just one topic to talk about how their husband is cheating. I'm beginning to suspect some certain people are behind this foul play. Really I'm suspecting some people.

The stories abound because the sitiations abound. It is really that simple!
Even if the posters are just messing around, you can be sure that it's the story of many women out there.

Please be gentle with him,nothing can change a cheating spouse,except he/she decides..

The more aggressive you get with him,the farther,he goes to the other lady..

The ball is in your court.

...he reconnects with an old 'friend' and d general assumption from the wise NL family is that he is cheating.
@first consideration, don't u think a cheating husband would have been smart enuff t cover his tracks especially knowing u have his password.

@o.p, wisdom doesn't act with sentiments nor assumptions..n making wahala now especially if it turns out to b false accusations will only work contrary.

You're the 'madam', call ur husband, tell him ur grievances, lay the rules down if needs be,esp concerning the lady in question.

keep in mind, Most ppl advising u here aren't married as well.
Be wise



'nuff said

chival:
@chibic: nah, it may look that way but it isn't necessarily so. I still remember the shock I felt when a friend of mine said to me "...afterall we all cheat." The thing is the bad gets talked about so much that the good seems to dwindle into obscurity.

There are many good marriages and faithful couples out there.

True dat...
Bad news they say is the sweetest.
we ignore the good

EroticAngelina:
oh dear I feel ur pain. some men are just so wicked without a conscience. tell him to stop whatever extra marital affair he z having or u divorce him. but bfor u do that, pray for him.

And what problem would divorcing him solve...? Instead of you to advise her to settle issues amicably, talk to the husband and make him see reason(s) why he shld love and be faithful to his family.

dBard:
...he reconnects with an old 'friend' and d general assumption from the wise NL family is that he is cheating.
@first consideration, don't u think a cheating husband would have been smart enuff t cover his tracks especially knowing u have his password.

@o.p, wisdom doesn't act with sentiments nor assumptions..n making wahala now especially if it turns out to b false accusations will only work contrary.

You're the 'madam', call ur husband, tell him ur grievances, lay the rules down if needs be,esp concerning the lady in question.

keep in mind, Most ppl advising u here aren't married as well.
Be wise



'nuff said

You obviously didn't read the Op. Better still, you got eyes problem.

Shirley07:

You obviously didn't read the Op. Better still, you got eyes problem.

The friend is in quote..dum dum.

Exposing ur ignorance so early in the year.

dapsy4u2:


And what problem would divorcing him solve...? Instead of you to advise her to settle issues amicably, talk to the husband and make him see reason(s) why he shld love and be faithful to his family.

It will prevent stories that touches e.g std, Hiv e.t.c
Moreover, she didn't ask her to divorce. She said the op should ask her husband to choose either his marriage or his $lut. You should know men aint worth the stress.

dBard:



The friend is in quote..dum dum.

Exposing ur ignorance so early in the year.

You expected a reaction, you got it dumbass.
What were you expecting when you said Nl went haywire because an husband is seeing an old friend? You really stink of stupidity.

Shirley07:

You expected a reaction, you got it dumbass.
What were you expecting when you said Nl went haywire because an husband is seeing an old friend? You really stink of stupidity.

u really do lack comprehension.
Not everyone seeks attention on NL. I've got all the attention I need in reality

I do pray u attain some sense this year...fruitless prayer I know, but we can only hope.

You've got your daily attention dose..... Enjoy


@o.p..sorry for derailing

Redoil:
Men are polygamous by nature so kini big deal.

errmm