10 Ways To Overcome Public Shyness by headboyprince(m): 7:39am On Jan 07, 2015 |
Are you shy or feeling embarrased when ever the need to speak in the public arises. This has created a lot of shy people in the public today Below are ways to overcome that shyness 1THINK ABOUT THE ROOT OF YOUR SHYNESS.Shyness doesn't necessarily equate to being introverted or not liking yourself. It simply means that for some reason you get embarrassed when the spotlight hits you. What's the root of your shyness? It's generally the symptom of a larger problem. Here are three possibilities: *.You have a weak self-image.This happens when we evaluate ourselves and that voice in our heads is negative. It's tough to stop listening to it, but at the end of the day it'syourvoice and you can tell it what to say. *.You are preoccupied with how you come off.This happens when we focus too much on ourselves. Because we spend all day monitoring our actions and making sure we don't mess up, we assume everyone else is too. We'll talk about turning the focus on others if this sounds like you. *.You are labeled as shy by others.Sometimes, when we're little, we're shy. Unfortunately, people latch onto that and treat us as such, even when our personalities grow out of it. It's possible that others have lumped you into this category and you're trying to accommodate them. The good news? You only have to accommodate yourself. *.Whatever your reason, it's doable to get over it. They're all ways of thinking and thinking is the one thing you have control over. Yes! 2 ACCEPT YOUR SHYNESS .One of the first step to overcome your shyness is try to accept your shyness and be comfortable with it. The more you will resist it unconsciously or consciously, longer it will prevail. If you are shy then accept it and embrace it totally. One way it could be done is by saying to yourself repeatedly 'Yes I am shy and I accept it'. 3 FIGURE OUT YOUR TRIGGERS Do you become shy in front of new audiences? When learning a new skill? When venturing into a new situation? When surrounded by people you know and admire? When you don't know anyone somewhere? Try to pinpoint the thoughts that go through your head right before the shyness hits. *.Odds are not all situations make you shy. You're okay being around your family, right? How are they that different than the strangers around you? They're not -- you just know them better and what's more, they know you. It's not you, it's just the situations you're in. This proves that it's not a global, 100% of-the-time thing. 4 MAKE A LIST OF SITUATIONS THAT MAKES YOU ANXIOUS. Order them so that those things that cause you the least anxiety are first and those that cause you the most anxiety are last. When you put things in concrete terms, it feels like a task you can tackle and tackle successfully. *.Make them as concrete as possible. "Talking in front of people" may be a trigger, but you can get more specific. Talking in front of those who have more authority than you do? Talking to those you find attractive? The more specific you are, the easier it will be to identify the situation and work through it. 5 CONQUER THE LIST OF SITUATIONS THAT MAKE YOU SHY .Once you have a list of 10-15 stressful situations, start working through them, one-by-one .The first few "easier" situations will help build your confidence so that you can continue moving to more difficult situations on your list. *.Don't worry if you have to go backwards on the list sometimes; take it at your own pace, but make an effort to push yourself. 6 USE THIS SHYNESS AS A CUE. Whatever inside you that triggers shyness is because we perceive it as a trigger for shyness. Its like computer programming when in a 'program' gets a certain typeinterruptit behaves in the same way how we have programmed it to handle interrupts. Similarly our mind can be programmed too. Think a little deeper we were programmed since our childhood, to react to certain stimuli like stay away from strangers, heights, dangerous animals etc. However for certain stimuli our reactions are default, means we perceive them and react in a way which comes naturally to us (by default) and this reaction could be flawed. For example When people see alizardsome would it as an ugly reptile, while some would perceive it as a beautiful pet, this could be because of their natural(by default) reaction or response to the stimuli(lizard). In the same way when shy people see people(stimuli) your natural response isshyness. The truth is that you can change this response by re-programming your mind. Some ways this could be done by... *.Questioning yourself and checking the validity of your reasons. *.Its essential that you practice speaking in public to really overcome the problem of shyness. Try to see this shyness as a Cue to push yourself hard and to do the opposite of what you have been doing when you feel shy. When you feel shy in public you probably leave to another quiet place because this has been your default reaction for so long but this time when you feel shy, push yourself and do the opposite i.e talk to people. Yes you will feel extremely uncomfortable and negative but again see these emotions as a trigger to push yourself even harder. More the magnitude of these negative emotions, the harder they will motivate you to push yourself. After trying this for several times you will realize that these negative feelings and emotions were actually your good friends because they motivated you to push yourself even harder. 7 PLACE YOUR ATTENTION ON OTHERS .For 99% of us, we become shy when we think if we speak up or stand out, we'll embarrass ourselves. That's why it's important to focus on others, placing our (mental) attention elsewhere. When we stop focusing on ourselves, we stop being able to be worried how we come off. *.The easiest way to do this is to concentrate on compassion.When we're feeling compassionate, sympathetic, or even empathetic, we stop being concerned about ourselves and start devoting all our mental resources to understanding others. Remembering that everyone is fighting some sort of battle -- big or small (big to them!) -- helps us remember everyone deserves our care. *.If that doesn't work, imagine a thinking pattern like you imagine other people have. If you're worried about how you look, you're assuming everyone else is outwardly focused While they're not. Thinking patterns are contagious; once you start, you won't be able to stop. 8.VISUALISE SUCCESS. Close your eyes and visualize a situation where you might be shy. Now, in your mind's eye, think about being confident. Do this often, and for different situations. This is most effective if you do this daily, especially in the morning. It might feel silly, but athletes use visualizationto develop their skills, so why not you? *.Involve all your senses to make it feel the most real. Think about being happy and comfortable. What do you sound like? What are you doing? That way when the time comes, you'll be prepared. 9. PRACTICE GOOD POSTURE. Standing tall gives the world the impression that you are self-confident and receptive to others. Often we are treated the way we feel -- so if you feel open and approachable, your body will emulate that feeling.Bodyover matter! *.This will foolyourbrain, too. Research says that good posture (head held high, shoulders back, and open arms) makes us feel authoritative, confident, and -- to top it off -- reduces stress. And you didn't even need more reasons! 10.DONT COMPARE YOURSELF TO OHTERS.The more you compare yourself to others, the more you will feel that you are not able to measure up and the more intimidated you will feel, which will make you shyer. There is no use to compare yourself to anybody else -- but if you do, do it realistically. Everyone else is overwrought with self-assurance problems, too! *.Seriously. If you have some super confident and extroverted friends or family members, ask them about this topic. They'll probably say something, "Oh, yeah, I totally make it a conscious thing to put myself out there" or "I used to be terrible. I really had to work at it." You're just on a different phase of the process than they are. http://naijacomedyzone./2015/01/07/10-ways-to-overcome-public-shyness 1 Like |
Re: 10 Ways To Overcome Public Shyness by Mynd44: 7:43am On Jan 07, 2015 |
I am shy and proud. I don't intend to overcome it |
Re: 10 Ways To Overcome Public Shyness by Nobody: 8:01am On Jan 07, 2015 |
My shyness no get remedy! |
Re: 10 Ways To Overcome Public Shyness by mhyra(f): 12:15pm On Jan 07, 2015 |
trust me.. they(we) know all these. |
Re: 10 Ways To Overcome Public Shyness by Karleb(m): 12:24pm On Jan 07, 2015 |
Mynd44: I am shy and proud. I don't intend to overcome it There is nothing to be proud about being shy, it's like you saying you're timid and proud ![grin](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/grin.png) , now you get the picture. Although there's nothing wrong with being an introvert, a geek or nerd and proud. |
Re: 10 Ways To Overcome Public Shyness by Karleb(m): 12:26pm On Jan 07, 2015 |
mhyra: trust me.. they(we) know all these. And what's stoping you from doing all those, you shy? ![grin](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/grin.png) |
Re: 10 Ways To Overcome Public Shyness by mhyra(f): 1:15pm On Jan 07, 2015 |
Karleb:
And what's stoping you from doing all those, you shy? ![grin](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/grin.png) hehe.. Not really.. I'm just shy in a cute way ![tongue](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/tongue.png) |
Re: 10 Ways To Overcome Public Shyness by Karleb(m): 1:26pm On Jan 07, 2015 |
mhyra: hehe.. Not really.. I'm just shy in a cute way ![tongue](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/tongue.png) In a cute way as in when you crush is around? ![wink](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/wink.png) |
Re: 10 Ways To Overcome Public Shyness by mhyra(f): 2:30pm On Jan 07, 2015 |
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Re: 10 Ways To Overcome Public Shyness by Karleb(m): 3:53pm On Jan 07, 2015 |
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