MizMyColi:
Well generally speaking, I think it's okay to feel slightly envious (emphasis on slightly) but she must watch it! She must not give the devil (if any) a chance.

eckersley:
YES. YES. YES
But ladies do it in a low key/undercover manner

They will employ all manners of guilt-tripping tactics

Since u got promoted,
1. You no longer care for me the MOTHER of your children

2. You just abandoned your family

3. You no longer pray/go to church, neglecting God, Most High
who gave u the promotion and can TAKE IT AWAY IN THE TWINKLE OF AN EYE

blah blah blah

Let a guy say any of the BS she said, and u'll see them feministas and pseudo-women
rights activists shouting

He's intimidated by her success
He's not a real man
He's jealous
She shd divorce his unsupportive ar.se
Blah blah blah

All these feministas and pseudo-women rights activists ehn, una be PROPER WINCH/KPIANCE

Mynd44:
It is called comparative assessment. Some people make it sound bad but it is normal for people to think that way and as long as it does not make her spiteful or negative, there is nothing wrong in being bothered that someone around you is moving foward and you ain't or not moving fast enough

Reference:


My dear it is not okay. It is not right, period. If indeed they are married it shows they are not a couple. How can one be envious of oneself. What I see are two people tugging in opposite directions. Though I am a strong advocate of the 'ladder climb' in family development (one gender moves up while the other supports, then the other gender behind moves past while the other supports), I cannot understand what the man is 'celebrating' for since his wife is 'left behind' and I cannot understand what the wife is mourning for if she knows its 'her turn' next and he will be doing the heavy lifting.

I'm sorry, I'm pro institution. I'm pro family and individualism is the worst killer of institutions. I repeat, they are not married or just pretending to be.

MizMyColi:


I think I was speaking more in a general term, than pertaining the issue at hand.

Owh well, I agree. So?

elantraceey:
Envy is an evil trait that eats up a relationship slowly.

elantraceey:
Envy is an evil trait that eats up a relationship slowly.

AreaFada2:
.

Better pikin.

Abeg you don marry?

chiibekee:
Yes if the husband is selfish

Meldrick:
Ahhh, Yes oooo. It happens very well. Especially when both of them are working class people and it is so prevalent these days. My friend was making the same complain to me, how his wife had a fight with him and was openly telling him they are in competition. Anytime properties are bought, she wants the property in her name. Immediately the guy began his Masters programme, she was feeling very uneasy and insisting she wants to begin too. I really wonder what marriages are turning into.

elantraceey:



Yes o


*flaunts my ring*

tenry:
I witnessed one recently, in fact i wanted to create a thread on this issue but the ops beat me to it.
One of my colleagues loved banking job and he was desperate to work in a bank for 3 years without success even though he read accounting. His wife read chemistry and immediately after her NYSC, she relocated to Lagos. She wrote an aptitude test conducted by a consulting firm on behalf of union bank and was successful. She went for the interview and for good 7months, they didn't hear from them again. The lady got one small job shortly and they got married. Precisely a year after my colleague's wife attended the interview, she was sent a job offer mail and was directed to report to the training school the following week with a start up salary of over 200k. My colleague first saw the mail cos he logged in to check her wife's mail. He announced to us in d office and suddenly his mood changed. I need to add that his immediate younger brother was also employed along with his wife by union bank. We were working in a private company with salary little above 100k. Being the kind of person he is, we all knew he was not happy about it cos what could hav caused a mood swing at a time he shld be happy. His mood remained the same nearly to d close of work. One of the big sisters in d office asked him why he was not happy, he just responded coldly that 'nothing'. Then sister B started telling him to forget d fact that he could not get what he has been struggling with over the years and that his wife got it. Destinies ar diff, may be not God's will for him, bla bla bla.

omonnakoda:
Simple minds see things as good or evil ,good or bad ,God or devil . There is no such thing. Everything has a duality and are part of the same. We like to associate with the "good" and shun the "evil" but thi is hypocrisy and a profound lack of understanding of the nature of phenomena. EVERYTHING has within it in EQUAL MEASURE of the "good" and of the "bad"

The so called God and Devil are but the same entity.

What is this one saying?

eckersley:

What is this one saying?

omonnakoda:
Why the Period?? People will always have a different opinion. Everyone gets angry but not everyone is violent. To deny envy or jealousy is just hypocrisy. Envy is a fundamental part of human nature for which we try to find socially acceptable outlets like sport . For me envy is neither good nor bad just like fire it can build or destroy. Rather it is one of those emotions that presents challenges and opportunity for human development. Denial is not the way to manage it

The issue is not whether one experiences so called "negative" emotions but how one manages or channels them within the context of a "group" whether this be a family,community or nation. No normal person in the scenario described above will not experience self doubt or resentment that is NORMAL let us not pretend to be what we are not. I suspect part of the criticism would stem from the fact that it is a woman. Men do worse everyday and that is socially more acceptable