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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / Dear Family, A Depressed Soul Needs Your Advice. (19578 Views)
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Re: Dear Family, A Depressed Soul Needs Your Advice. by moneypassmadam: 7:58pm On Jan 28, 2015 |
Dont use that as a reason to waste your life away. Use what you have and become who you want to be. |
Re: Dear Family, A Depressed Soul Needs Your Advice. by moscobabs(m): 7:59pm On Jan 28, 2015 |
if this is what makes u afraid of marry then your family is caused |
Re: Dear Family, A Depressed Soul Needs Your Advice. by passionate88: 7:59pm On Jan 28, 2015 |
Chai |
Re: Dear Family, A Depressed Soul Needs Your Advice. by juniormusa(m): 8:00pm On Jan 28, 2015 |
Hmm just try and forgive ur dad even though it's hard..buh he's still your dad no matter the situation....It is well.. |
Re: Dear Family, A Depressed Soul Needs Your Advice. by Nobody: 8:01pm On Jan 28, 2015 |
Is it when he dies before u know his value as your father...fine,he wasn't there for u initially but he has realised his mistakes..Forgive him,embrace him cos no matter what he is still your father..God guide you in your decisions. 2 Likes |
Re: Dear Family, A Depressed Soul Needs Your Advice. by Nobody: 8:02pm On Jan 28, 2015 |
You havent found someone who really like you. 1 Like |
Re: Dear Family, A Depressed Soul Needs Your Advice. by barapistis(m): 8:04pm On Jan 28, 2015 |
Free your self with the word or get myles monroes books |
Re: Dear Family, A Depressed Soul Needs Your Advice. by chemystery: 8:04pm On Jan 28, 2015 |
OP, is marriage all that matters in this life? 1 Like |
Re: Dear Family, A Depressed Soul Needs Your Advice. by bynat(f): 8:05pm On Jan 28, 2015 |
Pray to God for the patience to endure till ur time comes which I know wouldn't be long from now. Hey, keep away lies, cheats, deceits and falsehood out of it and do not forget if u can't eat yam cos of oil, you eat oil cos of yam. Forgive him!!! |
Re: Dear Family, A Depressed Soul Needs Your Advice. by Phrint(m): 8:05pm On Jan 28, 2015 |
ToroJah:when d door of happiness closes, another one opens but often times we look so long at d closed door without knowing d one which has been opend for us. 1 Like |
Re: Dear Family, A Depressed Soul Needs Your Advice. by Nobody: 8:08pm On Jan 28, 2015 |
tundeayo2020: Reply my pm abeg |
Re: Dear Family, A Depressed Soul Needs Your Advice. by esoboy875(m): 8:09pm On Jan 28, 2015 |
Pls dear, don't deny ur father no mata wat he had done. Pls in d name of God, welcom him back. In d aspect of u getin married, jst bliv God bcoz He only knws d better, charming, wonderful, responsible, godly, dedicated, listening, loving nd humble husband for u. In all just trust Him. I wish u d vry best |
Re: Dear Family, A Depressed Soul Needs Your Advice. by Sweetlemon(f): 8:11pm On Jan 28, 2015 |
Your exes didn't love you. They were only looking for a wife. Wait till you find a man that loves you. A man loving you has nothing to do with your background. 2 Likes |
Re: Dear Family, A Depressed Soul Needs Your Advice. by Truckpusher(m): 8:12pm On Jan 28, 2015 |
It doesn't take rocket science for folks to figure out that kids from broken homes sometimes do better in marriages as they have seen it all due to their own history , what they've lost due to their parents immaturity and they are not ready to put their own kids through all that emotional nightmare if they have any milk of human kindness - I would have supported that folks from broken homes should marry themselves only if that would serve as a lesson to those that advocates for divorce for every little provocation as if it is a means to an end. The scar of divorce is not always peculiar to those that are directly affected but the society itself yet here on NL we have too many people on this thread that supports and encourages divorce giving advice to the same op who is becoming a victim of the system they have always supported. What an irony. 1 Like |
Re: Dear Family, A Depressed Soul Needs Your Advice. by rofemiguwa(f): 8:17pm On Jan 28, 2015 |
Easy for you to say. The sperm donor has always being dead to her!!! Everyone is not a father! Op I feel for u cos of the situation. Its unfortunate u have not met a man that truly loves u.he will atke u as u come and value u as a pperson not becoz of where u comE from. I am from a broken home too but my fiance knows and loves and respects me as an individual. The last tin I will do is bother my heAd unnecessarily during my wedding over one sperm donor like that. I wish u all the best.op. Don't worry a better man is coming ur way Modesayo: 1 Like |
Re: Dear Family, A Depressed Soul Needs Your Advice. by Nobody: 8:17pm On Jan 28, 2015 |
Truckpusher: You know, sometimes you sound so sweet, responsible, caring and humane - I would just smile and say that's my truckpusher. But sometimes....hmmm Nice post. |
Re: Dear Family, A Depressed Soul Needs Your Advice. by Nobody: 8:17pm On Jan 28, 2015 |
ToroJah: May they continue dumping you until you take your useless life. Good riddance. |
Re: Dear Family, A Depressed Soul Needs Your Advice. by olaayo105(m): 8:19pm On Jan 28, 2015 |
elantraceey: I love your comment. God bless you 1 Like |
Re: Dear Family, A Depressed Soul Needs Your Advice. by Truckpusher(m): 8:23pm On Jan 28, 2015 |
Sweetlemon:Stop deceiving the op. No young man in his right senses and properly taken care of by his parents with no adverse history would take a wife home without the blessings of his parents. You had a good relationship with your parents and you suddenly saw this girl but they are against it and you think you can just go out all the way to do your own thing? Then you have no idea the kind of emotional dependency that exists between families that are bonded by love and loyalty. Your love for your parents and your loyalty to them do not just die overnight as a lot are usually involved and that can't just be waved aside for a girl you prolly met some few years ago.This is why every reasonable guy that is going outside his parents approval would have done his homework by marketing the girl's image before you let the cart out of the bag. If you're mother or father doesn't like the girl you're dating/bringing home , you're in deep shiit my sister and you've got only few choices either make them change their mind by convincing them or always come home with the right choice.Simple If you marry without your parents approval at a point you'll hate yourself - How could one with conscience constantly live his/her life aware that his/her kids are just being tolerated and not loved unconditionally? 1 Like |
Re: Dear Family, A Depressed Soul Needs Your Advice. by englishmart(m): 8:23pm On Jan 28, 2015 |
ToroJah:I don't know. Ask google 1 Like |
Re: Dear Family, A Depressed Soul Needs Your Advice. by mimikio(f): 8:24pm On Jan 28, 2015 |
Beliv me we all hav our stories, mine isn't diff from urs. But 2 God b d glory, aam married 2 a wondaful man. 1st, 4giv ur dad, not 4 him, but 4 u. 2nd, b more prayerful so story don't repeat itself. an lastly none among d 2 men is urs. Beliv me urs wnt even look @ wat odas looked@. |
Re: Dear Family, A Depressed Soul Needs Your Advice. by Nobody: 8:24pm On Jan 28, 2015 |
While I agree you should forgive your father I know how you feel and it might not be so easy as it seems , I am familiar with your situation and it has taken a lot of courage to forgive my father for the wrongs he has done to me but it is the only way to happiness ( it is not an option ). The right man is just around the corner so don't be disheartened , a man who can't relate with you and your problems isn't fit enough to be your husband , spread your net wider and you'll surely see a man who'll love you despite family background. It is well. |
Re: Dear Family, A Depressed Soul Needs Your Advice. by rofemiguwa(f): 8:24pm On Jan 28, 2015 |
Your head is dere You have said it all This is the true face of the matter Truckpusher:We know what we went through and wiLl give an arm and leg to make sure our kids don't go thru it. That is why sometimes they might be victims of abuse. Cos they rather stay than repeat the circle. So op don't be hasty in ur choice. Pray about iT. Everytin will fall in place in its time. |
Re: Dear Family, A Depressed Soul Needs Your Advice. by jomoh: 8:25pm On Jan 28, 2015 |
ToroJah: Lovely sis. There's nothing like forgive and forget. We have no control over what we forget or remember. But when we forgive we tend to ignore the things that wronged us and try to pick the positives from it thereby creating a kind of happiness/fulfilment in us. Also, when we forgive, it prepares us for the possible re-occurrence in the future. |
Re: Dear Family, A Depressed Soul Needs Your Advice. by Truckpusher(m): 8:25pm On Jan 28, 2015 |
Kachisbarbie:But that makes me a real human - And not some pretending Mr nice guy wannabe,I just say my mind and leave the world to judge me the way they like and just like every normal human sometimes I misfire big time. 1 Like |
Re: Dear Family, A Depressed Soul Needs Your Advice. by Nobody: 8:32pm On Jan 28, 2015 |
kmcutez: I wan give you a piece of my mind but I come think am again say if person dey argue with mad woman dem go think say person mad sef , so I go hold my peace. You'll surely get what's coming to you 3 Likes |
Re: Dear Family, A Depressed Soul Needs Your Advice. by Opiosko: 8:33pm On Jan 28, 2015 |
ToroJah:Fair lady, i know u have gotten many sound advise but i would still love to add a silient point. This issue looks more of a spiritual affliction than a physical issue. (More likely a household wickeness attack) Ur dad was probably targeted and they are singling his issues out for attack. They want to fraustrate u, make u wonder what value u have in life.....the ultimate aim is to useless such individual and make him or her to die a miserable wrench... There is however one consolation, God fights for folks like u without u knowing. Pls go closer to God and cry to him, u will see a marked change.. NB pls ur parants needs ur help and prayers, not anger and resentment. They are probably unawear of the source of their problem. Engage in prayers without letting anyone know what u are up to. May God hear ur heart rending groans and deliver u and ur family in Jesus name. Amen. 1 Like |
Re: Dear Family, A Depressed Soul Needs Your Advice. by mecussey(m): 8:34pm On Jan 28, 2015 |
My gf is from the same kind of family brought up by a single mother and I don't even know how my people will see her. The truth is that elders know women alone cannot bring up a child perfectly. If the woman has money, she may take the child to the best school but that fatherly fear children see on their dads will not be their hence the child might be ignorant on some certain things. |
Re: Dear Family, A Depressed Soul Needs Your Advice. by Godiloveu(f): 8:36pm On Jan 28, 2015 |
I had similar experience, well! they say. "time heals all wounds. " ur family status does not guarantee d right man, but only gives u an opportunity for plenty options, dats all! I ve let go of d past, swimming into d future everyday in gud health. no human is worth it, just for d sake of humanity dat companionship is needed. Ops : forgive Dad, forget if u can, take suicide off ur list, live as if u dont need a man. then u will experience peace in abundance. #my 2 cent! |
Re: Dear Family, A Depressed Soul Needs Your Advice. by electropiz(m): 8:38pm On Jan 28, 2015 |
Pray God Gives A life partner, always tell guys u meet early about this before the relationship gets serious, finally personally i will marry a lady that am compatible with.... The home she came from don't matter that much! |
Re: Dear Family, A Depressed Soul Needs Your Advice. by Nobody: 8:38pm On Jan 28, 2015 |
Truckpusher: What a load of shiite , so you'll end a very good relationship cos your parents don't approve of your partner , and who says if you marry without their blessings you'll hate yourself . |
Re: Dear Family, A Depressed Soul Needs Your Advice. by Nobody: 8:39pm On Jan 28, 2015 |
ToroJah: @OP I am from a broken home and getting married was not easy as I could not get my Father to attend the wedding and my wife's parents are strongly traditional about Family Background which had influenced my fiance back then. I am not sure my advice will work for you but as a guy,that did not bother me. I explained to them that all this happened when i was 3 years old. it was not my fault and I cannot blame them for taking decisions they felt was right for their relationship. I can only put our future ahead of us and raise a family we can both be proud of. After months of deliberation and after 4 years of courting and constantly visiting her parents and showing much love.. they took me in and allowed the marriage to happen. Any Nigerian Man who is strongly Traditional above the realities of modern society is one to avoid. not that they are intrinsically bone-headed and natively old-school, they are the types that live in the past and try to work in the future.. they will keep you as a house-wife , stifle your ambitions as a human being and have you make babies that you cannot afford to raise (in the quest for a male child). Look for more exposed men, with ambitions and respect for modern day independent women. in most cases they won't be African - dem fit be Whitey all na husband. Strangest thing is once it is a foreigner, Nigerians don't have any such reservations on Family Background and sh#5t like that 2 Likes |
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