About a month ago i posted this https://www.nairaland.com/2066432/tell-not-tell because i needed solution on what to do. Anyway let me get to the point, this evening the little guy was in my house (he never stopped coming) and playing game on my ipad, when he left i noticed that 200 naira was missing from the change my security guy gave me from an errand i sent him earlier in the day (i left the change on my chair side stool). I remember because the 200 naira was the highest denomination in the change. I called the lil guy and asked him for the money he denied at first but accepted after i shouted at him; i asked him to give the money back he said he used it to buy recharge card and has loaded it. I slapped him and told him to kneel down i was shocked he did not cry because i slapped him like i would slap a guy my age. His mother came back from travel today because she lost her younger sister to a domestic gas accident so i donot think this is the best time to tell her a thing like this. I called a Naval officer i my compound who has a daughter of about 4 years old and asked him what i should do because i did forgive the lill boy the first time. I was shocked to learn from the Naval officer that that the little guy at a point in time did play with his daughter' private part and the little girl reported to her parents. He told me not to tell the mother because she will turn the case against me (she is that sort of woman) he told me never to allow the lad enter my apartment again. I initially did not want to post this but i think its only fair to tell folks here what happened because at a time i came here to ask for a solution.

Your slap alone will make his brain not function well.
Haba, because of 200 bucks you slapped a youn person like that?
Dont allow him into your home again.

delishpot:
Your slap alone will make his brain not function well.
Haba, because of 200 bucks you slapped a youn person like that?

i knew a reply like this will come. i wish i slapped him the first time cos if he remembers the slap he would not have done it again and mind you if he had done this outside a mere slap would be the least of your problems

ernie2007:


i knew a reply like this will come. i wish i slapped him the first time cos if he remembers the slap he would not have done it again and mind you if he had done this outside a mere slap would be the least of your problems

So to you, the solution to his problem is to beat him or burn him to death ba?
You are not better than him fa, he steals from you and in return you physically abuse him.
See, I am not here to tear you down. You must realize that he has a problem. He needs help and you surely cant help him by beating him like a snake. He is not properly brought up by his mom, he lacks structure and love and for sure he needs help.
If he steals from you, dont let him enter your house.

delishpot:


So to you, the solution to his problem is to beat him or burn him to death ba?
You are not better than him fa, he steals from you and in return you physically abuse him.
See, I am not here to tear you down. You must realize that he has a problem. He needs help and you surely cant help him by beating him like a snake. He is not properly brought up by his mom, he lacks structure and love and for sure he needs help.
If he steals from you, dont let him enter your house.

Seconded.

carefreewannabe:

Seconded.

Did you read my first post? am sure if you did you will understand that i love this kid like he was my own. Truth be told sometimes children just need iron hand. I am a soft person and i am not scared to admit it. As a matter of fact i pray God gives me a Mean woman for a wife because i am that sort of father that may never hit my child. Please read the link i posted. Am not claiming i know it all or am skilled at parenting but somewhere inside me i know that if i had hit him the first time, he would not have done it again. He comes to me when he wants card and if he had asked i would have gladly given him and for what its worth i think his mother is doing the best she can.

delishpot:


So to you, the solution to his problem is to beat him or burn him to death ba?
You are not better than him fa, he steals from you and in return you physically abuse him.
See, I am not here to tear you down. You must realize that he has a problem. He needs help and you surely cant help him by beating him like a snake. He is not properly brought up by his mom, he lacks structure and love and for sure he needs help.
If he steals from you, dont let him enter your house.

I concur

Please don't let that boy enter your flat again. The thing don enter im blood.

Jackeeh:

I concur

If you took your time to read the first link i pasted am sure you will see that i talked to him, i did not lay a finger on him even when he stole a larger sum of money. What i have learnt in all these is that when it comes to kids; employ measure till you find a solution that works and if that solution works, stick to it. I have talked to him before and it did not work. Please forgive me for trying another solution and do take your time to read the link i pasted. Do not just concur say something. We are here to learn me inclusive

ernie2007:


If you took your time to read the first link i pasted am sure you will see that i talked to him, i did not lay a finger on him even when he stole a larger sum of money. What i have learnt in all these is that when it comes to kids; employ measure till you find a solution that works and if that solution works, stick to it. I have talked to him before and it did not work. Please forgive me for trying another solution and do take your time to read the link i pasted. Do not just concur say something. We are here to learn me inclusive

Its all good bro. I get you were angry and thought pain help him remember how not to steal. That boy is a kleptomaniac I guess It seems he just steals for no reason. Underneath sha, he needs counceling and you, cant help him beyound what you did already.
Dont let him enter your house, its punishment enough. When you see him tell him he is a thief and as such you cant allow him into your house. Tell him in a way that shows dissapointment rather than insult To him. You can call him from time to time to talk with him and find out how he is faring and if he needs help in any way you can offer.
I am not saying he did the right thing o. All I am saying is you cant quench fire with petrol.

delishpot:

Its all good bro. I get you were angry and thought pain help him remember how not to steal. That boy is a kleptomaniac I guess It seems he just steals for no reason. Underneath sha, he needs counceling and you, cant help him beyound what you did already.
Dont let him enter your house, its punishment enough. When you see him tell him he is a thief and as such you cant allow him into your house. Tell him in a way that shows dissapointment rather than insult To him. You can call him from time to time to talk with him and find out how he is faring and if he needs help in any way you can offer.
I am not saying he did the right thing o. All I am saying is you cant quench fire with petrol.

Thank you, i will do just that.

delishpot:
Your slap alone will make his brain not function well.
Haba, because of 200 bucks you slapped a youn person like that?
Dont allow him into your home again.

Delish forget. A hot, factory reset slap must precede any counselling. After resetting his brain with the slap, you can now sit him down and counsel him.

Op, don't allow him into your house again before he steals the boxers off your waist.

Ishilove:

Delish forget. A hot, factory reset slap must precede any counselling. After resetting his brain with the slap, you can now sit him down and counsel him.

Op, don't allow him into your house again before he steals the boxers off your waist.

Ha ha That kain slap go reconfigure any brain sharp sharp. What if Him just slump and faint during reset? Shey if they post story here say a guy slapped a young boy to coma cos he stole his money twice, shebi na still una go talk say this OP is wicked o, how can he hit a small child that hard, haba, even if the boy stole his pay check. When he knew the boy was a thief, why did he let him in a second time, bla bla bla, we smell a lie , pishure of him slaping the boy or adonbelive it slap the guy to coma too let him learn how it feels etc etc. Now wey e never reach that level, lets jejely keep it this way nau

ernie2007:


Thank you, i will do just that.

Eh, if you try and see that you cant help, remove hand jeje and move forward . You cant save all of humanitY but you played your part in his life.

all this people saying slap isn't the solution
why don't you just campaign for robbers, rap!sts, terrorists ......to be sat down and counseled instead been punished by the law?
you see when a young person start showing bad traits such as stealing and molesting and ask he be advised without given him a sample of what he will get in future if he continues that way ( even after being counseled at the first ' act of stealing')
I say slap him hard and counsel follows immediately.

am sure its because of the moms over pampering that got the boy to this stage ( one can see "that" from what the naval guy told the OP)
the mother must be very supportive in regards to her sons action and she will call it counseling

they will pet and pamper their kids and when the law gets them they cry "what have I not done".

OP just be sure you don't exceed reasonable punishment.
am saying this so you don't go about thinking you're doing your kid something bad

but since he is not your son just don't let him close anymore, if you must then you must teach him the right way by all means ( which includes punishment)

He's even touching a small girl's kini too?
That boy needs better counseling and iron hands.

cococandy:
He's even touching a small girl's kini too?
That boy needs better counseling and iron hands.

Most kids touch or are fascinated by the oppisit genders kini. Its left for parents to guide them in the right way to view their own sexual organs and the organs of others.
If you UnCloth a child in the presence of another, you will notice that they get interested as all kids do with what seem strange. Its normal and should be guided by parents. Sex education starts then.
Talks like its called peepee, its special to only you, dont let anybody play with it, if any one touches it tell mom or dad, dont touch other peoples own, its special to only them etc etc.
He clearly is not well broght up and if people cant trust him, better to keep him from their homes and kids.

Same thing I'm saying.
He needs serous counseling

delishpot:



Most kids touch or are fascinated by the oppisit genders kini. Its left for parents to guide them in the right way to view their own sexual organs and the organs of others.
If you UnCloth a child in the presence of another, you will notice that they get interested as all kids do with what seem strange. Its normal and should be guided by parents. Sex educazion starts then.
Talks like its called peepee, its special to onky you, dont let anybody play with it, if any one touches it tell mom or dad, dont touch other peoples own, its special to only them etc etc.
He clearly is not well broght up and if people cant trust him, better to keep him from their homes and kids.

cococandy:
Same thing I'm saying.
He needs serous counseling

Yeah. True thaT. You nor dey sleep?
Oya go to bed.

delishpot:


Yeah. True thaT. You nor dey sleep?
Oya go to bed.

lol. It is not yet night here.

cococandy:
lol. It is not yet night here.

Ohhh, ok. Enjoy the day then. Let me go continue my crash. I woke up to pee and coulnt fall right back to sleep.

delishpot:


Ohhh, ok. Enjoy the day then. Let me go continue my crash. I woke up to pee and coulnt fall right back to sleep.

oh. I know that feeling.

Sweet dreams

@ernie2007

May your softness not be your undoing, say Amen. You should not let this boy into your flat again as it is your softness is getting the better of you. Part of love is knowing when to be firm, too much softness will only make this guy think he can get away with anything. In fact stop any playfulness towards this guy, he will only see playfulness on your part as a chance to commit. The last time I said you shouldn't tell his mother in the hopes that it was a one off incident but this new revelation that he is a "pedo" in the making erases any doubt that he needs his mother's discipline. Even if she reacts the wrong way the knowledge becomes her burden not yours.

BTW I don't advocate smacking other people's children, that can be turned against you so quickly you won't believe it so don't do it again.

@Op.. dont allow him into ur apartment again,that punishment alone will spur him to be of good behaviour!!

Say NO to CHILD TORTURE and ABUSE

ernie2007:
About a month ago i posted this https://www.nairaland.com/2066432/tell-not-tell because i needed solution on what to do. Anyway let me get to the point, this evening the little guy was in my house (he never stopped coming) and playing game on my ipad, when he left i noticed that 200 naira was missing from the change my security guy gave me from an errand i sent him earlier in the day (i left the change on my chair side stool). I remember because the 200 naira was the highest denomination in the change. I called the lil guy and asked him for the money he denied at first but accepted after i shouted at him; i asked him to give the money back he said he used it to buy recharge card and has loaded it. I slapped him and told him to kneel down i was shocked he did not cry because i slapped him like i would slap a guy my age. His mother came back from travel today because she lost her younger sister to a domestic gas accident so i donot think this is the best time to tell her a thing like this. I called a Naval officer i my compound who has a daughter of about 4 years old and asked him what i should do because i did forgive the lill boy the first time. I was shocked to learn from the Naval officer that that the little guy at a point in time did play with his daughter' private part and the little girl reported to her parents. He told me not to tell the mother because she will turn the case against me (she is that sort of woman) he told me never to allow the lad enter my apartment again. I initially did not want to post this but i think its only fair to tell folks here what happened because at a time i came here to ask for a solution.

You were advised in your initial thread to correct that child and report his behaviour to his mother. You chose to ignore the latter part of the advice which was to tell his mother, instead, you chose to play daddy to a J.S.S 3 boy. Now exactly one month on, you can see that it's escalated and he's even added more crimes to his petty thieving.

Listen, you aren't his dad, neither are you his "buddy".

Do the right thing and tell his mother everything. She needs to know what he's getting up to. Obviously the lack of a father figure is part of the problem here, but like I said, you aren't his daddy and you have no right to slap someone else's child.

Once the mother knows what she up against with regards to that son of hers, she should then seek ways of helping the lost kid. Let other, more mature men in her family / church get involved in correcting him now before it's too late. I advocate for these older and more experienced fathers to get involved rather than you because you simply do not know the first thing about parenting, let alone bringing up teenage boys.

delishpot:


So to you, the solution to his problem is to beat him or burn him to death ba?
You are not better than him fa, he steals from you and in return you physically abuse him.
See, I am not here to tear you down. You must realize that he has a problem. He needs help and you surely cant help him by beating him like a snake. He is not properly brought up by his mom, he lacks structure and love and for sure he needs help.
If he steals from you, dont let him enter your house.

Where do people like you come from?

Stealing is not corruption.

Dheartless:
all this people saying slap isn't the solution
why don't you just campaign for robbers, rap!sts, terrorists ......to be sat down and counseled instead been punished by the law?
you see when a young person start showing bad traits such as stealing and molesting and ask he be advised without given him a sample of what he will get in future if he continues that way ( even after being counseled at the first ' act of stealing')
I say slap him hard and counsel follows immediately.

am sure its because of the moms over pampering that got the boy to this stage ( one can see "that" from what the naval guy told the OP)
the mother must be very supportive in regards to her sons action and she will call it counseling

they will pet and pamper their kids and when the law gets them they cry "what have I not done".

OP just be sure you don't exceed reasonable punishment.
am saying this so you don't go about thinking you're doing your kid something bad

but since he his not your son just don't let him close anymore, if you must then you must teach him the right way by all means ( which includes punishment)

Abe help me tell them o. So if their sons start stealing, they won't beat before counselling. No wonder some kids are becoming terrible.

This is one of the problems we are facing in this generation...... we are too ambivalent..... we don't know when to be bad and how to go about it. I swear, if I was the OP I will keep morality aside and slap the hell out if him, after that call a general meeting in the compound, am preety sure the OP is not the only one that has fell victim to the boys bad habit. He needs some form of humiliation to make him feel remorse.

delishpot:


So to you, the solution to his problem is to beat him or burn him to death ba?
You are not better than him fa, he steals from you and in return you physically abuse him.
See, I am not here to tear you down. You must realize that he has a problem. He needs help and you surely cant help him by beating him like a snake. He is not properly brought up by his mom, he lacks structure and love and for sure he needs help.
If he steals from you, dont let him enter your house.

If he stops him from entering his house and the boy continues with his bad way of life what then do we do?

1miccza:


If he stops him from entering his house and the boy continues with his bad way of life what then do we do?

Hr has tried. He cant do more than that. If thr boy doesnt stop after that slap, and continues to steal, what will he do?

delishpot:


Hr has tried. He cant do more than that. If thr boy doesnt stop after that slap, and continues to steal, what will he do?

And if he meets with ano unfortunate incident probably death while on such acts do you think the Op's conscience would be @ rest?