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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / She Went To My Phone, Now She Is Threatening A Divorce. (43632 Views)
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Re: She Went To My Phone, Now She Is Threatening A Divorce. by ifyalways(f): 12:19pm On Feb 12, 2015 |
She is not ready for marriage just yet. @OP, dont call or contact her,let her be, I'm sure her parents would chase her back to you. However, when she comes back, accept her, seat down with her and have a talk. She needs to get a grip on her temper, learn to ask questions, how to deal with marital problems. You sef you need some reality check. You are married now and there should be closure with your ex'es and side chicks. 5 Likes |
Re: She Went To My Phone, Now She Is Threatening A Divorce. by thorpido(m): 12:21pm On Feb 12, 2015 |
Closetoheart:I'm not pro-divorce.I actually encourage forgiveness and reconciliation. However,I do see so many people hurt in marriages(especially women)and it doesn't make sense to keep staying in such marriages.A woman told me of how she recently found out her husband has a baby from another woman.I'm I going to tell her to keep staying in that marriage if she wants to leave?Can she really be happy in that union? The reality is that your hubby can pick up an infection outside and you could get infected if you sleep with him.You say you will protect yourself but I don't see how a woman will keep having sex with her husband with a condom. Seek a genuine change for your husband.Encourage him to see a counsellor and better still a sex therapist. 16 Likes 1 Share |
Re: She Went To My Phone, Now She Is Threatening A Divorce. by obongtunji: 12:25pm On Feb 12, 2015 |
If you are a Muslim, there is no big deal because Muslims can marry 4 wives. But if you are a Christian and you are here asking if what your wife did was wrong or right then you have a long way to go. She has every right to check and even be in possession of your phone, mind you the reason you don't check her phone is because of your dirty secret, blame yourself for having extra-marital affair and not your precious wife. You should be ashamed she even left your house and you were looking at her, I don't know why we can't say I'm sorry right or wrong besides you are even wrong here. Please call your wife and offer her a proper apology, drop your pride and do the needful. Just put yourself in her shoe, what will you do if you see such messages in her phone ? Just sincerely answer that question. My man please you can start by sending her apology messages immediately because she might not want to even pick your call now, but the messages will soften her mind before you call her or see her face to face, smashing your phone and every other things she did was out of love. 7 Likes |
Re: She Went To My Phone, Now She Is Threatening A Divorce. by Closetoheart: 12:26pm On Feb 12, 2015 |
thorpido: Okay. I can do some of the things suggested here. Thanks. We learn everyday. 5 Likes 1 Share |
Re: She Went To My Phone, Now She Is Threatening A Divorce. by thorpido(m): 12:29pm On Feb 12, 2015 |
mutter:Your second question contradicts your earlier statement.If you resign yourself to it as you said,then how easy will it be staying in that permanent stage of protecting oneself? There are women who say come what may,I will stay in that husband's house and it's ok for them if that is what they want. However,the energy and sanity to want to save for the children may not be there because your mind cannot totally go off it and it will keep weighing on your emotions. 7 Likes |
Re: She Went To My Phone, Now She Is Threatening A Divorce. by auntymi(f): 12:59pm On Feb 12, 2015 |
Tallesty1:u too get |
Re: She Went To My Phone, Now She Is Threatening A Divorce. by Abrahamweb(m): 1:36pm On Feb 12, 2015 |
she is not serious,birds of the feather,na the same mama born them. meaning,how did the op n d wife meet,theres this lady,she'd always complain that the husband is always cheating on her,that the husband is always chasing girls,guess how they met! in a bar,where he was fishing for girls to f**k.i usually advice her to be patience,because thats how he was when they met and she knows,i told her to be patience and he'll change eventually and he did,although it took a while. but op be careful,if she cannot nag at you and you'll ask for forgiveness,she's not a wife(well good wife i mean). |
Re: She Went To My Phone, Now She Is Threatening A Divorce. by elantraceey(f): 1:58pm On Feb 12, 2015 |
5minsmadness: It depends , truth is i won't just go through his phone just like that but when he passwords his phone and specially tells me not to touch then he's hiding something. |
Re: She Went To My Phone, Now She Is Threatening A Divorce. by flyca: 2:04pm On Feb 12, 2015 |
On another note: Dear Sisters, if you find such chats on your boyfriend, fiancee, husband's phone, FIRST, take a screenshot, send to your own phone. Ehhhen, other things can follow from there. #tenk 10 Likes |
Re: She Went To My Phone, Now She Is Threatening A Divorce. by chival(f): 2:27pm On Feb 12, 2015 |
elantraceey: I tire my sister. That is what you get when you get married to a man who thinks he's lord and master of the manor and that he is doing a woman a favor by marrying her. There is no such thing as privacy in marriage. You signed off your privacy when you agreed to become one with your wife. Instead of fuming here, you should be addressing your issues with your wife. If the messages she saw are incriminating, apologise and accept your fault. Cheating(if that is what happened) is the sin here, not snooping. 18 Likes 3 Shares |
Re: She Went To My Phone, Now She Is Threatening A Divorce. by kandiikane(m): 2:46pm On Feb 12, 2015 |
Closetoheart:Will you be living your life too as you have left him to live his? Don't get it twisted, a broken home doesn't mean a single parent, there are many children from single parent homes who live amazing lives. A broken home means an abusive partner and parent or a cheating and destructive partner and parent basically a destructive home. You were conditioned to stay in such situations. You my dear are from a broken home and so will your children. Your son will think it is ok to sleep around with no repercussions whilst your daughter will stay in an abusive relationship because that is what she sees and knows as normal. I know you said "be wise" but I am telling you BE WISE, my dear! It is up to you to stay but protect your children very very well. A cheating husband and father is not ok or normal neither is a sufferhead wife or mother, vice versa. It is better for your children to know you live in an open marriage than whatever they are seeing in your marriage, a wife and mother being cheated on left right and center and she is ok with it. Wisdom doesn't come because you said so. 27 Likes 4 Shares |
Re: She Went To My Phone, Now She Is Threatening A Divorce. by Enoquin(f): 3:46pm On Feb 12, 2015 |
It really is depressing what some folks have turned marriage into. Last december, you lied before God and many witnesses. And that's why I respect athetists, at least their stand is known...unlike the 'christians' who profess to follow the steps of christ but live worse than most atheists. Your assumption of 'living happily' is pure delusion. On one hand is you having your cake (wife and girlfriend/mistress) and eating it, on the other hand is a purely ignorant wife. December - Feb 11 is darn too short for you to misbehave and misyarn. While some women can live with a cheating or abusive husband or men with an abusive wives, others cannot. Background of the victim is mostly important when giving advices especially if we want to break the cycle of emotionally dependant parent on their offspring(s). Some people can swallow akamu, others cannot. Some can bear to have co-wives, others cannot. Some cannot withstand secrecy and unnecessary privacy in their marriages, others can. What one can bear so they do not reach their breaking point is peculiar for each individual. So, OP if you no longer desire your wife for this high 'wrong' she has committed. Go and return her brideprice then...If not buckle up and make that marriage work, it takes the reduction of 'I' for 'we' to work. As for women, I know how emotional we can get but take a breather before you go smashing phones, tables and cars or before you start wailing. Times have changed ogbon is now required. There was a time when men were kind and their voices were soft and their words inviting....there was a time, then it all went wrong - I dreamed a dream (Anne Hathaway) 10 Likes 1 Share |
Re: She Went To My Phone, Now She Is Threatening A Divorce. by Tallesty1(m): 4:01pm On Feb 12, 2015 |
Re: She Went To My Phone, Now She Is Threatening A Divorce. by Tallesty1(m): 4:06pm On Feb 12, 2015 |
MizMyColi:I will like to see you angry one day. They say, calm ppl are dangerous when they are on edge. That's if they eventually snap, because they are known(@least majority of them) to manage anger perfect well............ 1 Like |
Re: She Went To My Phone, Now She Is Threatening A Divorce. by auntymi(f): 4:12pm On Feb 12, 2015 |
Tallesty1:mouth sealed |
Re: She Went To My Phone, Now She Is Threatening A Divorce. by otimothy(m): 4:12pm On Feb 12, 2015 |
op...you are are the major reason i kick against child marriage(in this case na u be the pikin) 4 Likes |
Re: She Went To My Phone, Now She Is Threatening A Divorce. by MizMyColi(f): 4:19pm On Feb 12, 2015 |
Tallesty1: I was angry today na. See Below You should ask questions first before jumping into conclusions. You're right though. That's the bane of a Type 9. Everyday, I find that I lose the capacity to get angry and cuss rabidly. Sometimes e dey vex me sef. Someone will annoy me and instead of me to bear a grudge or remain angry for long, I find that I actually bless them in my heart and sometimes apologise sef Other times sha, I damn the consequences and get angry. I might end up feeling miserable though. No one is worth making me miserable, so I do my best to keep my cool 1 Like |
Re: She Went To My Phone, Now She Is Threatening A Divorce. by Tallesty1(m): 4:48pm On Feb 12, 2015 |
MizMyColi:Lols, This one happened online So I didn't see your face. What I want is to see the expression on your face when you are angry. Watch it's color change and predict ur next move. That's all. Weird thoughts thou............ I do get angry once in a while but I don't show it. Partly because of the person I wish to become and partly because I do hard starting when I am angry. I have learned to control it sha because it is very bad when I am "really" angry. very very bad. |
Re: She Went To My Phone, Now She Is Threatening A Divorce. by MizMyColi(f): 4:52pm On Feb 12, 2015 |
Tallesty1: Owh, offline? Hmmm..... I reserve my comment |
Re: She Went To My Phone, Now She Is Threatening A Divorce. by boolet: 4:55pm On Feb 12, 2015 |
Enoquin: Many self-acclaimed Christians do not know what the bible really teaches, and that's why they do not truly have a standard. All they see are dogmas. 2 Likes |
Re: She Went To My Phone, Now She Is Threatening A Divorce. by Tallesty1(m): 4:56pm On Feb 12, 2015 |
Re: She Went To My Phone, Now She Is Threatening A Divorce. by baybiemee: 7:15pm On Feb 12, 2015 |
@ OP, if you are so ashamed to post the content of the chat here, then she has every right to be angry. You sound like an arrogant man. Your marriage is so young and you are already cheating. Pathetic. Do u think it's worth it? 10 Likes |
Re: She Went To My Phone, Now She Is Threatening A Divorce. by 2good(m): 11:06am On Feb 13, 2015 |
Marriage is a fraud for men. Men have nothing to benefit from marriage in the 21st century because they are still expected to retain their traditional roles while women have ditched theirs mostly. The problem is that society still brainwashes young men that they stand to gain something from being married and many of them drink the Kool-Aid not knowing what they are getting into. I am very sure the situation will improve in the future as reality makes more men to choose to avoid marriage as it is already happening in the western countries. 5 Likes |
Re: She Went To My Phone, Now She Is Threatening A Divorce. by Lumpyy(f): 11:17am On Feb 13, 2015 |
princesslucy83:Really?are u sure you are female? 1 Like |
Re: She Went To My Phone, Now She Is Threatening A Divorce. by Femsyn(m): 12:54pm On Feb 13, 2015 |
"The evil that men do, live after them"; This is an old adage, now, it is "The evil that men do, live with them". Going through your previous posts or complaints, one can easily deduce that you are a womanizer. The woman (your wife) must have seen these traces before tying the knots with you, so i see no reason why she's crying wolf now that all is done and dusted. However, I think you never gave her reasons to trust you, and thats why she was sniffing around. Mr man, you need to work on yourself and be ready to be a married man, cos i dont agree you're one yet. 7 Likes |
Re: She Went To My Phone, Now She Is Threatening A Divorce. by chibic(m): 1:43pm On Feb 13, 2015 |
Women are always quick to jump into conclusion..she say a chat between you and another woman and so what?..why can't she say what she saw and why she had to smash the phone.she was just too jealous to notice you are chatting with another woman.it really surprises me because women are the ones that sleeps on social media chatting,flirting and sending nak.ed pics to online boyfriends.but when their husbands just chat with another woman,all hell will be let loose.if OP is the one that smashed her phone for chatting with another guy,women on this thread will still blame him and call him immature.abeg OP no give yourself hypertention because this life is too short.no mind what women says here.they are birds of the same feathers and hypocrites. |
Re: She Went To My Phone, Now She Is Threatening A Divorce. by Ewuro4: 2:16pm On Feb 13, 2015 |
charles009: Hehe na wah.. |
Re: She Went To My Phone, Now She Is Threatening A Divorce. by Nobody: 6:06pm On Feb 13, 2015 |
Baba buy one carton of cold Orijin and chilax. She will come back. Igbo people call her action "iwe akakpo". Keep some bottles for me too ooo 1 Like |
Re: She Went To My Phone, Now She Is Threatening A Divorce. by allanphash7(m): 6:07pm On Feb 13, 2015 |
wetin she sef dey find? ohun oju n wa ni oju ri she should go ahead for divorce now who is begging her? look her very well she is from otuoke |
Re: She Went To My Phone, Now She Is Threatening A Divorce. by BuddhaPalm(m): 6:08pm On Feb 13, 2015 |
charles009: Next time, use Vault https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.netqin.ps&hl=en |
Re: She Went To My Phone, Now She Is Threatening A Divorce. by mcdokwe(m): 6:09pm On Feb 13, 2015 |
charles009:It is not a question of if she should have assessed your phone, it is a question of if your were supposed to do what you did as a married man and if you would have taken it lightly with her if you saw same in her phone. 5 Likes |
Re: She Went To My Phone, Now She Is Threatening A Divorce. by neyur: 6:09pm On Feb 13, 2015 |
elantraceey: Na you b d wife?....y u come put the matter for head like D.j khalid.. |
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