Going by the high demands and unnecessary conditions attached to marriage, many young men now see marriage as 'luxury'. They save and save and save over and over again, just to fulfill that cultural obligation! Omo, wetin dey happen sef? Which way? Is this part of our culture or just a social trend that was started by our society people. It has even become so annoying to learn that even among the middle class and the average citizens, the expectations are so high and outrageous!!! Just check out some of these:

1) You might be asked to buy boxes of clothes for the mother and probably, grandmother of the wife-to-be!!! What would her grandmother be needing box of clothes for? Will she wear them all before she finally tell the world 'good-bye?' Come to think of it, is the man getting married to the girl's mother or grandmother?

2) If you collect list finish, you go know say na 'egbegba' for the matter The fact is that, after fulfilling what's on the list and other things attached, the woman might still go out to bleep one of her ex-lover! Bride price or dowry should not be more than 1500 naira or at most, 2000 naira. After paying that, eating and drinking with family and friends (in a moderate way o!), the man and woman should be free to go their house and start their family. All this issue of eating and drinking as if there is no tomorrow, closing down an entire town or street, inviting every Tomide, Dike and Haruna is pure RUBBISH!!!

3) Why should I save for marriage as if I am paying for a land, house or car. Same woman that will stay in same house with me and which we will both give birth to children together? I don't get it!

This nonsense is making many young and ambitious men to be scared of marriage and even committed relationships!!!

Please, feel free to share your views.

This can make people go out of their ways to borrow and pay for things they cant afford.
I will rather discuss with the family and come to an understanding. 'this is what I can afford', especially when their demands are too extravagant.
What is the point when you spend all your funds on the wedding while you Guys are struggling or servicing debts in the marriage.

ArchEnemy:
This can make people go out of their ways to borrow and pay for things they cant afford.
I will rather discuss with the family and come to an understanding. 'this is what I can afford', especially when their demands are too extravagant.
What is the point when you spend all your funds on the wedding while you Guys are struggling or servicing debts in the marriage.

The most annoying part is that people save to marry! Is it suppose to be that way?

Rapmoney:

The most annoying part is that people save to marry! Is it suppose to be that way?

I dont think saving for marriage is a problem, the problem is allowing yourself to be forced to spend too excessively above your budget

Rapmoney:

The most annoying part is that people save to marry! Is it suppose to be that way?

Trash! White wedding is a waste of resources, it's not biblical. People need to be wise and stop chasing shadows. Paying of the woman's bride price is what expected of every male Christian to perform even the celebration after paying the dowry is a total waste, I don't subscribe to it. Any pastor that refuses to recognise a wedding done traditionally needs to be questioned if he truly understands the bible.

ammyluv2002:
Trash! White wedding is a waste of resources, it's not biblical. People need to be wise and stop chasing shadows. Paying of the woman's bride price is what expected of every male Christian to perform even the celebration after paying the dowry is a total waste, I don't subscribe to it. Any pastor that refuses to recognise a wedding done traditionally needs to be questioned if he truly understands the bible.

seconded!

ammyluv2002:
Trash! White wedding is a waste of resources, it's not biblical. People need to be wise and stop chasing shadows. Paying of the woman's bride price is what expected of every male Christian to perform even the celebration after paying the dowry is a total waste, I don't subscribe to it. Any pastor that refuses to recognise a wedding done traditionally needs to be questioned if he truly understands the bible.

Ammyluv, if loving you will cost me 14 years in jail, I'd gladly pay the price.

Honestly! And you need to attend the marriage classes organized by some churches to see how the counsellors and pastors do shakara. They even told us we MUST specially feed the pastors and ALL the church unit members!

If I had my way, NO white wedding! I have even told my vineyard that there will be no bride's maids, groom's men and asoebi!

In fact, when he told me how much he intended to spend, I reduced the budget by 50% and told him we would use the rest to open an account for our children's education/welfare.

I am very irritated at the thought of spending so much for a ceremony that wouldn't last more than a few hours. All those talk of you only wed once don't move me. There is a life after the wedding!

Evina:


Ammyluv, if loving you will cost me 14 years in jail, I'd gladly pay the price.

Honestly! And you need to attend the marriage classes organized by some churches to see how the counsellors and pastors do shakara. They even told us we MUST specially feed the pastors and ALL the church unit members!

If I had my way, NO white wedding! I have even told my vineyard that there will be no bride's maids, groom's men and asoebi!

In fact, when he told me how much he intended to spend, I reduced the budget by 50% and told him we would use the rest to open an account for our children.

I am very irritated at the thought of spending so much for a ceremony that wouldn't last more than a few hours. All those talk of you only wed once don't move me. There is a life after the wedding!

Laughable! My dear, don't let any man push you around. C'mon, don't you read your bible? These are just mere human laws so don't let them bully you. I really don't understand what's happening in churches these days, we are just too lazy to read our bible .

Life is a LUXURY in Nigeria. . . .
@ $1 to N250 ?
Death is better o!
Chai!!!!

OYEL money don finish. . . shakara do h-end!

ammyluv2002:
Laughable! My dear, don't let any man push you around. C'mon, don't you read your bible? These are just mere human laws so don't let them bully you. I really don't understand what's happening in churches these days, we are just too lazy to read our bible .

Sweetie, when it comes to marriage, wisdom must be applied to the fullest. I can't insist on having my way because I am NOT getting married to myself. Especially in Nigeria where the wedding is not just about the couple but families as well.

ammyluv2002:
Trash! White wedding is a waste of resources, it's not biblical. People need to be wise and stop chasing shadows. Paying of the woman's bride price is what expected of every male Christian to perform even the celebration after paying the dowry is a total waste, I don't subscribe to it. Any pastor that refuses to recognise a wedding done traditionally needs to be questioned if he truly understands the bible.

You just spoke my mind ammy

We need to balance wanting luxury (since the ceremony should be once in a lifetime) and cutting costs according to our pockets.

We should also be able to differentiate btw stuffs that last and stuffs that won't.

IMHO, spending so much for a gown, hairdo or makeup is ridiculous

Evina:


Sweetie, when it comes to marriage, wisdom must be applied to the fullest. I can't insist on having my way because I am NOT getting married to myself. Especially in Nigeria where the wedding is not just about the couple but families as well.

Well, you're right sha

Evina:


Ammyluv, if loving you will cost me 14 years in jail, I'd gladly pay the price.

Honestly! And you need to attend the marriage classes organized by some churches to see how the counsellors and pastors do shakara. They even told us we MUST specially feed the pastors and ALL the church unit members!

If I had my way, NO white wedding! I have even told my vineyard that there will be no bride's maids, groom's men and asoebi!

In fact, when he told me how much he intended to spend, I reduced the budget by 50% and told him we would use the rest to open an account for our children's education/welfare.

I am very irritated at the thought of spending so much for a ceremony that wouldn't last more than a few hours. All those talk of you only wed once don't move me. There is a life after the wedding!

I once argued why Africans engage in white wedding on this forum. I was almost consumed by e-warriors!

bukatyne:
We need to balance wanting luxury (since the ceremony should be once in a lifetime) and cutting costs according to our pockets.

We should also be able to differentiate btw stuffs that last and stuffs that won't.

IMHO, spending so much for a gown, hairdo or makeup is ridiculous

So many things are luxury as regards marriage, but even family members make it worse. In some tribes, u have to cook for the community youths! Common!!! Are my getting married to the youths of the community?

Rapmoney:

I once argued why Africans engage in white wedding on this forum. I was almost consumed by e-warriors!

It is ignorance!
And they make you feel that if you don't go through the white wedding, you are not a Christian? Big lie!

Okay, why then wouldn't they wed you in church if you haven't done the traditional?

The white wedding is the culture of the westerners, just as the trad is our culture. What I know as a Christian is that God will endorse that wedding, so far parental consent has been given. And that dowry is the proof of parental consent.

Rapmoney:

So many things are luxury as regards marriage, but even family members make it worse. In some tribes, u have to cook for the community youths! Common!!! Are my getting married to the youths of the community?

As a guy, state what your pocket can accommodate and if your potential in-laws are not fine with it with your intended not seeing reason with you, please bail or ignore them till they are ready for the marriage

I was referring more to the ceremony anyways

Evina:


It is ignorance!
And they make you feel that if you don't go through the white wedding, you are not a Christian? Big lie!

Okay, why then wouldn't they wed you in church if you haven't done the traditional?

The white wedding is the culture of the westerners, just as the trad is our culture. What I know as a Christian is that God will endorse that wedding, so far parental consent has been given. And that dowry is the proof of parental consent.

God bless you. You are very correct! Most of our people think that white wedding is Christian. It is not. I don't even see any need for it because it contributes to the financial burden placed on Africans!

Rapmoney:

God bless you. You are very correct! Most of our people think that white wedding is Christian. It is not. I don't even see any need for it because it contributes to the financial burden placed on Africans!

Lol. Trust Africans and their discipleship mentality. All things copied from the westerners are good. That is so pathetic!

bukatyne:


As a guy, state what your pocket can accommodate and if your potential in-laws are not fine with it with your intended not seeing reason with you, please bail or ignore them till they are ready for the marriage

I was referring more to the ceremony anyways

True talk. U are very correct. Nice point of view.

Angry Hungry people are ranting. Na when una enter the main event na im una go no say training na wash.

Nutase:
Angry Hungry people are ranting. Na when una enter the main event na im una go no say training na wash.

What's your point? Don't tell me you just made sense because if I believe that it means I would believe anything!

Still still, I'm coming to Nigeria to marry.

i dey find rich gf to marry pls

bukatyne:

As a guy, state what your pocket can accommodate and if your potential in-laws are not fine with it with your intended not seeing reason with you, please bail or ignore them till they are ready for the marriage
I was referring more to the ceremony anyways

Real Talk

Foolishness is when you carry your life savings to celebrate marriage. My people, there is life after the ceremony na.

ednut1:
i dey find rich gf to marry pls

our politicians pikin re callin, wetin u dey wait for

Hmmmm see wat poverty is causin ooooooo. Work hard for success n u won't be rantin all these bullshit, instead u'll enjoy spendin money on expensive stuffs....

#VoteGEJout
for letting the lives of more 15000 nigerians to lost

On a budget. ..I got affordable interior design ideas...

She will marry you for free self..when are done with ur apartment.

Keep your orders
coming in.

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