my husband I decided to go for an HIV test recently.
I requested my test results be revealed to me privately to which the Doctor replied that since me and my husband are one ,he would share the news to both of us Surprisingly, my husband agreed with the agreement and said there is nothing to fear
. To cut the long story short,the result came out Positive. Since then, My husband has become so uncomfortable with me. Though he didn't tell any member of his family and associate with me when we are in public,at home he shows his true self and his always accusing me of Infidelity and even threatened a divorce. I have never engaged in any extra marital affairs and how I got the disease is still a mystery to me though my husband has also refused to tell me his own test result saying it was irrelevant anyway.
We have a only a child and he has since refused to have sex with me. .my problem is should the doctor have announced the result in the presence of my hubby and he didn't even inform him that a new baby can be protected from the disease
I feel the doctor is responsible for my marital crisis.



NB- The story is of a woman in dileema.Not the Op.Your advice and opinion is highly welcome

Are you gay?

isn't gay marriage outlawed in nigeria?
why is this faggòt at large when he should be serving 10 years in kuje prison?

*takes a drag of imaginary weed*

Your problem shouldn't be the doctor sharing your result with your husband, it has already happened. Your problem should be trying to educate your husband on HIV (both the possibilities and drawbacks) and working on how to put your marriage back together.

If you have a conscience which I believe you do, you'll agree with me that what the doctor did was right in as long as you went to the Doctor together, nevertheless, the doctor should have also revealed your husband's status as per his test, having known that, he'll now give counsel to you both. Having HIV is not not a death sentence, it can be managed medically and also God can heal you of it. Your husband only needs to be supportive at this period. I suggest both of you see a counselor in that regard.

Well your hubby should know that infidelity is not the always the most likely way of contracting HIV.

Your husband needed to be told.
However it was wrong of the doctor to go back on the agreement. however he probably did not imagine it would end up that way.
anyway your husbands status needs to be made known to you.
It might be that your husband has it too and is now using attack as a form of defense.

D couple seem not 2 trust demselves.
Anyway de shud try make der marriage wrk no matter wat. No separation.

You can't hide your status from your partner.
It is wrong

But why is his own status a secret?
The doctor should have told you both your statuses in each other's presence.

Some guys can be very mischievous. If he's negative,why is it secret?

Hmm

i need to buy my own clipper asap especially not now that i have know 87 in 100 women cheat on their boyfriend in nigeria

What are you even saying?

Mods Front page pls..As much advice and opinion we can get.

Dis kind story de quick reach front page.

Meanwhile apc goons be like: Hiv will be a tin of d past immediately GMB/PYO com on board.

N fayose gonna reply: GMB shud cure himsef first b4 curing naija.

The doctor was wrong to have made the statement that ''since both of you are one, he will reveal d test result in front of your husband.'' That bullshit is in religion not medicine. Medically you are two distinct individuals and you are entitled to that confidentiality. You have the right to choose to learn of your status privately. No one can force you to do otherwise. You should have insisted on it or even threatened to report d doctor. You gave in far too easily and since you did not object, he did what he did. The law says volenti non fit injuria. He who consents cannot complain of injury.

That being said, even if you had learnt of d result privately I think d doctor could still have revealed your status to your husband if he felt you were putting him at risk. Partner Disclosure is a very murky aspect and it differs from country to country but I think if d doctors feels you are deliberately withholding ur status from ur partner thereby putting him at risk then he should be able to notify him.

As for your Husband's status, go back to the same doctor and tell him d same bullshit he told you about you n ur hubby being one and then demand forcefully o know your husband's result. He wont have d guts to withhold it from you. If he does, threaten to take legal action against him.

You both went as a couple for the test.What is usually done is that both partners are counselled and the result disclosed to them together.I don't know why the doctor will disclose one person's result and keep quiet about the other person.It's not the norm.
I suspect the man is positive too by his reaction.

By the way,infidelity is not the only way to contract HIV.

Iamsynord:
my husband I decided to go for an HIV test recently.
I requested my test results be revealed to me privately to which the Doctor replied that since me and my husband are one ,he would share the news to both of us Surprisingly, my husband agreed with the agreement and said there is nothing to fear
. To cut the long story short,the result came out Positive. Since then, My husband has become so uncomfortable with me. Though he didn't tell any member of his family and associate with me when we are in public,at home he shows his true self and his always accusing me of Infidelity and even threatened a divorce. I have never engaged in any extra marital affairs and how I got the disease is still a mystery to me though my husband has also refused to tell me his own test result saying it was irrelevant anyway.
We have a only a child and he has since refused to have sex with me. .my problem is should the doctor have announced the result in the presence of my hubby and he didn't even inform him that a new baby can be protected from the disease
I feel the doctor is responsible for my marital crisis.



NB- The story is of a woman in dileema.Not the Op.Your advice and opinion is highly welcome

The fact that u asked the doctor to reveal ur result to u privately is highly suspicious, so I wont rule out adultery but u might hv gotten it from ur manicurist or ur hairstylist...anyways u need to know ur husband's result, if he is negative, give him d divorce n save his life but if he is positive, u both can live together happily ever after and still make more kids..

Really would have loved to contribute, but the person in question is not you. Hope I'm right? Ethical issues are however, divisive.

DaGC:
Your problem shouldn't be the doctor sharing your result with your husband, it has already happened. Your problem should be trying to educate your husband on HIV (both the possibilities and drawbacks) and working on how to put your marriage back together.

the op is a guy and has disassociated himself from ownership of the issue!
so................

baralatie:

the op is a guy and has disassociated himself from ownership of the issue!
so................

I know. My post wasn't directed to the OP but to the person needing our opinions.

Autonomy. The doctor violated her right as an autonomous adult. There is nothing like they came as a couple.

In practice, how I handle this is first I counsel the patients separately before the test, separately after the test. If the result is favorable, no problem both can be told after I get a verbal consent. If it is a discordant result, I rest my case after the seperate post test counselling. Any consent to divulge the result to the partner must be a written one.

Even if a mother brought an 18yr old and her test is positive, no telling the mom. It is unfortunate, but that is what is ethical.

The benefit of violating a patient's right to autonomy and confidentiality far outweighs its expediency. Unless of cos, in cases where withholding such information poses danger to the community....eg Ebola patient and other reportable diseases. Not "private" matters.

That doctor could lose his license. It is usually a very serious matter and the professional ethics are clear.

Demand to know the hubby's status too,else threaten a legal action..

The release of your result to your hubby,while your hubby's status smack of insincerity of your hubby,d connivance of the doctor..after all,you went as a couple.

Hiv is nothing my dear, thanks to medicine, at the moment there are 45 kind of pills to treat it,
So take it easy, let him divorce you, and I tell you you will outlive him,
Magic Johnson is alive almost 30 years later and getting richer by the min,
Don't beat yourself look for NGOs giving free medicine register and take medicine for the rest of your life,

If you ever want to be pregnant consult a doctor to give you medicine to stop you from passing the virus to the baby.
The medicine stops the virus from growing,
Hope you are taking it all fine, you need someone to talk to let me know I will drop an email.

Whatever happened to patient confidentiality? Isn't it one of the ethics governing the medical profession?

The decision to divulge patient information to a partner should be with the express consent of the patient.That's where counselling comes to play .

During patient counselling, the MD should highlight the importance of sharing the information with the patient's partner and guide her towards making an informed decision in that regard!

Besides, why should Mr husband's result be concealed ?I guess the husband is hiding something as well otherwise he should come out with his result!

From a humanistic point of view, the news could be overwhelming for both parties, especially the husband in the event he's HIV - .
In this case(and otherwise), the need for counselling ,both medical and marital cannot be overemphasized, hence it's an option that is highly recommended.

Something may not be right here... why will the doctor reveal only hers? Why will she object to revealing it when they are already one (1+1 = 1)? Who is telling the truth here about infidelity? Only time will tell. I pray for understanding and God's divine healing and intervention in Jesus name, Amen!




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Generally doctors are bound by a duty of strict confidentially but in such situations, if he believes it is necessary to prevent a serious risk of harm, he can breach his duty of confidentiality. That's the law here, don't know about over there.

Knowing Africans, he probably did not say it because of the risk of harm, I am sure if it was the husband with hiv, the doctor would have kept mute.

Yomieluv:
Demand to know the hubby's status too,else threaten a legal action..

The release of your result to your hubby,while your hubby's status smack of insincerity of your hubby,d connivance of the doctor..after all,you went as a couple.

gbam

SwiftConnect:
Well your hubby should know that infidelity is not the always the most likely way of contracting HIV.

hmmn

I'm surprised at some of the responses here, even those that seem learned.

Obviously this story is fake, there is no way a doctor will bring a HIV result and still insist on telling the couple after the owner of the result has insisted that it should be confidential. Even here in Nigeria we still have our ethics, thank you very much.

Now, even if the doctor/pastor was foolish enough to disclose another person's HIV status to a third party, why will the same doctor now withhold the information from the other result? how would that conversation had gone? "sorry , you are HIV positive, em, there is no need to disclose your husband's own again since you are already positive..."? or would he read the woman's own out loud to the hearing of the man and then hand the man's own result to him confidentially in the presence of the woman? Ridiculous.

This is obviously a fabricated story concocted to whip up sentiment.