Often times, most young men in Nigeria are quick to see and pick out ladies who are not married in the society. They can go on and on to give You countless lists of reasons why these ladies are single and why they would remain so. Their reasons could centre on the quest for material things by these ladies or their high degree of pride. There's need to shift the search light a bit, to the male folks (Am still very proud to be a man and I wouldn't change it if I were to come to the world again). There are so many young men who are in their late twenties and thirties and still unmarried and lonely! What could be the cause? Because going by personal knowledge of some of my fellow young men and sober discussions I had with them, I have come to understand that most of them long for a committed relationship, marriage and a lovely family (My humble self is not exempted from this, please). Below are some of the salient reasons that could account for this type of situation:

1) The high cost of bride price (mostly in the eastern region) and the many unnecessary jamborees that go with marriage ceremonies (applicable to most parts of Nigeria) has made most young men to crawl into their shells like snails. When I created a thread on the issue of marriage becoming a luxury in Nigeria, some e-warriors wanted to slit my throat through their keypads. A situation where you have to save to facilitate a marriage, coupled with other pending projects begging to be attended to (We all know not everyone is Dangote's son), you might get confused and curse love. Especially, when you have so many things to accomplish or put in place. These days, most ladies would not date you beyond a year without you tying the knot with them (That is if you have not realised that you are the only one in a relationship that was originally meant for two).

2.Omo, e nor easy for some guys o! Who nor go nor go know. With the harsh economic conditions necessitated by our past rulers and complemented by the corrupt government of the day, many young men are still struggling to find their feet. You might not know this until you leave the comfort zone...the comfort of your parents home! That is if you have one! There are peeps who have never known comfort in a home since they were born! So you think this doesn't affect our young men physically, emotionally and psychologically? Some have come to 'hate' love and marriage yet, they long for them! This accout for why some young men are still unmarried and 'lonely'.

3) The lifestyles of most ladies in our society have also made it difficult for many young men to get married. You might hook up with a lady today with the false belief that she is decent and God-fearing; in the long run, you find out that everything has been a high profile scam!!! What next? You start all over again to fall in love and start a relationship! Common! That exercise drains your mental energy like hell!!! This has made young men to be very wary...many have remained single, still searching

4) The careless attitude of some young men is among the reasons why they are not married. I always encourage my younger male cousins and nephews to start life early enough. There are some men who spent their teenage and adolescent years drinking, partying, gallivanting and lazying about. They only reaslise that time is not on their side when they clock 38! In my neighbourhood, there men who are above 30 but their attitude and way of life, coupled with the way they talk and reason is half their age...not better that the reasoning of a silly teenager!!! If you are in this type of situation...no house of your own, no job, no degree, no training or skills, and you in your late twenties or early thirties, I seriously wonder if any sane and serious woman would want to enter into a committed relationship with you.

Views are very welcomed...
Goodmorning everyone

O.P well done, nice write up even tho I ddnt read a sentence.

This one you woke up to create this thread.

Did you dream of marriage last night?

U have got some points there, well kudos

Hehehehehehehehehehehe





well,






no be lie sha.

Uhmm

5. They don't wanna marry because marriage is overrated.

Nothing is more pathetic than waking up one morning to discover that you are alone and sad.

You spent all your time sampling girls and bragging about it, while making fun of those that have serious relationships and telling yourself that all girls are b.itches and w.hores and materialistic.

There are girls that when you hook up with, all the aforementioned reasons will not even count because they can go the extra mile to make it work.

Wake up brothers. Loneliness is not ideal.

Men don't need marriage provided there is steady supply of punna

Those who are desperate for marriage are only those who allow societal pressure to dictate the direction of their journey on earth. #fact

donpeey22:
Men don't need marriage provided there is steady supply of punna

They are getting what is supposed to be reserved for marriage so why worry when they can get a girl/girls to carry out wifely duties

Misplaced piorities- I know someone who is into flashy girls only and these girls in turn needs maintainance which he cannot provide. I keep asking why not go for the girl that you can take care of comfortably. I remember a gist he told me about going out with 1 of his gf to research for her finalyear project w years back, they were together at the taxi rank waiting for more passengers then a car reversed back and called his girlfriend's name, turned out it was an old friend of her's. She went towards the car, spoke with the occcupants, entered the car and they zoomed off leaving her supposed boyfriend who was going to help her with her project work.

okirewaju:
They are getting what is supposed to be reserved for marriage so why worry when they can get a girl/girls to carry out wifely duties

Misplaced piorities- I know someone who is into flashy girls only and these girls in turn needs maintainance which he cannot provide. I keep asking why not go for the girl that you can take care of comfortably. I remember a gist he told me about going out with 1 of his gf to research for her finalyear project w years back, they were together at the taxi rank waiting for more passengers then a car reversed back and called his girlfriend's name, turned out it was an old friend of her's. She went towards the car, spoke with the occcupants, entered the car and they zoomed off leaving her supposed boyfriend who was going to help her with her project work.

Hahahaha..ol'boy! The guy na confam maga oooo
But ladies bad sha

economic is prime.

SuperSuave:
K

U nor get shame?
By the way, two topics from Rapmoney on front page today, 6th March, 2015!!! Dancing Nkpokiti and Surugede dance!!!

donpeey22:
Men don't need marriage provided there is steady supply of punna

Those who are desperate for marriage are only those who allow societal pressure to dictate the direction of their journey on earth. #fact

Ur reasoning is not mature, I must tell u. When it comes to the time, u would understand better.

gnykelly:
economic is prime.

Yeah and I made that point very clear!

Richiy:
Nothing is more pathetic than waking up one morning to discover that you are alone and sad.

You spent all your time sampling girls and bragging about it, while making fun of those that have serious relationships and telling yourself that all girls are b.itches and w.hores and materialistic.

There are girls that when you hook up with, all the aforementioned reasons will not even count because they can go the extra mile to make it work.

Wake up brothers. Loneliness is not ideal.

You are very correct! Immature guys do that mostly. That's part of what separates the men from the boys.

Khabuqi:
5. They don't wanna marry because marriage is overrated.

Marriage is not overrated. Is there any society where people are not expected to get married?

Rapmoney:
You are very correct! Immature guys do that mostly. That's part of what separates the men from the boys.

When I see folks ranting all these stereotypical injustices, I just know they are yet to attain maturity. Boys are very different from men...very different

OP, you have made some really nice points especially NOs 1 & 4.....1 and 2 are invariably same...

No 3 is somewhat immaterial because you can't tell me no good girl around, except you have problems yourself...

MarvellousGod:
OP, you have made some really nice points especially NOs 1 & 4.....1 and 2 are invariably same...

No 3 is somewhat immaterial because you can't tell me no good girl around, except you have problems yourself...

Thanks. There are good girls and I didn't say otherwise but the rate at which most girls pretend is what I specifically hinted on.

okirewaju:
They are getting what is supposed to be reserved for marriage so why worry when they can get a girl/girls to carry out wifely duties

Misplaced piorities- I know someone who is into flashy girls only and these girls in turn needs maintainance which he cannot provide. I keep asking why not go for the girl that you can take care of comfortably. I remember a gist he told me about going out with 1 of his gf to research for her finalyear project w years back, they were together at the taxi rank waiting for more passengers then a car reversed back and called his girlfriend's name, turned out it was an old friend of her's. She went towards the car, spoke with the occcupants, entered the car and they zoomed off leaving her supposed boyfriend who was going to help her with her project work.

Rapmoney:
Ur reasoning is not mature, I must tell u. When it comes to the time, u would understand better.

If not to meet the societal expectation, give me one cogent reason why a man must marry. And don't even resort to bible because I don't believe in it.

Why do I need marriage when I can get as much healthy sex as I want, and even procreate through 'baby mamas' without necessarily being married? When I can also singlehandedly take care of my offspring?

Rapmoney:
Yeah and I made that point very clear!

majority of my friends who couldn't get a job after service settled for small jobs that pay a school leaver . which is something that is affecting their psyche.

Rapmoney:
Marriage is not overrated. Is there any society where people are not expected to get married?

It is overrated. The time and money devoted to promoting marriage might be better spent elsewhere.

Rapmoney:
Thanks. There are good girls and I didn't say otherwise but the rate at which most girls pretend is what I specifically hinted on.

Oga, pretense isn't for girls alone, guys too pretend.. it's applicable to both genders..

Same fear you nurture about her changing after marriage, girls nurture tooo......

Khabuqi:


It is overrated. The time and money devoted to promoting marriage might be better spent elsewhere.

I understand your point of view and I created a thread on the unnecessary expenses associated with our marriages. If that's what you mean by 'overrated', then you are on course but if what you mean is for young people to see marriage as unimportant, then there's no point in that.

MarvellousGod:
Oga, pretense isn't for girls alone, guys too pretend.. it's applicable to both genders..

Same fear you nurture about her changing after marriage, girls nurture tooo......

Ok, noted. I know guys pretend too but going by the topic...remember we are looking at possible reasons why most young men are unmarried and lonely.

E no easy o.... God help us.

gnykelly:


majority of my friends who couldn't get a job after service settled for small jobs that pay a school leaver . which is something that is affecting their psyche.

You are absolutely correct. Something most young Nigerian men face in their lives!

donpeey22:
If not to meet the societal expectation, give me one cogent reason why a man must marry. And don't even resort to bible because I don't believe in it.

Why do I need marriage when I can get as much healthy sex as I want, and even procreate through 'baby mamas' without necessarily being married? When I can also singlehandedly take care of my offspring?

You need a wife because you cannot give your children the emotional support a mothert would give to her children. Any child that doesn't grow up with both parents always end up up having one social problem or the other. It is the capable hands of both parents that can mould the child into what is expected of him or her!

cococandy:
This one you woke up to create this thread.

Did you dream of marriage last night?

I will soon get married

Marriage is overrated bro , nothing compares to been single.