Good evening.. Nairalnders.. Help a fellow nairalnder..


I have been dating this guy close 2 a year and i don't like d way he spends money.. He spends money on things that ain't necessary and do abandon d necessary ones.. I have tried talking 2 him abt it bt he just continue telling me he would change

we do go out with family and friends.. And when its tym 2 settle d bills he's d one that normally pay for it... The one that is giving me more concern.. He doesn't have a place of his own.. He stays with his friend and he's not getting any younger this year will make him 31 although he still looks young.. He promised 2 get a place last yr bt something came up.. He was expecting his goods worth 3.8 million bt it was seized by customs.. Although it gave him sleepless nyt bt dat doesn't stopped him from spending unnecessarily.. As am typing dis there are some necessary things he stills needs money for apart from this ones i mention bt he doesn't pay attention 2 them.

Am really concerned and am trying 2 change him bt i don't knw hw 2 go abt it.

Plssss matured advice as needed here.. No insults i beg una

What are the unnecessary things he spend on? Dont forget you are part of the things he spend on.

Some people are just bad with managing their finances. Why don't you convince him to let you help him, if he refuses then you got decisions to make.

falconey:
What are the unnecessary things he spend on? Dont forget you are part of the things he spend on.

since when he had a problem last year.. I stopped collecting money 4rm him... He spends more on drinks .. He doesn't mind buying 4 everyone.. We went out yesterday he did same.. Even 2day

When you fail to plan,you are planning to fail.Get facts and tell him about people that refused to manage funds and ended up "broke".This should scare him.

Yareey:
Some people are just bad with managing their finances. Why don't you convince him to let you help him, if he refuses then you got decisions to make.

i will try that... Thanks much

nerodenero:
When you fail to plan,you are planning to fail.Get facts and tell him about people that refused to manage funds and ended up "broke".This should scare him.

i told him abt dat but he promised 2 change and till this day he hasn't changed

Blizzyblinkzy:

since when he had a problem last year.. I stopped collecting money 4rm him... He spends more on drinks .. He doesn't mind buying 4 everyone.. We went out yesterday he did same.. Even 2day

. He shud limit goin out wit several pple. Spendin on drinks is a real turn off 4 me tho.

Blizzyblinkzy:
we do go out with family and friends.. And when its tym 2 settle d bills he's d one that normally pay for it... The one that is giving me more concern.. He doesn't have a place of his own.. He stays with his friend and he's not getting any younger this year will make him 31 although he still looks young.. He promised 2 get a place last yr bt something came up..

He's 31-years-old? Doesn't have a place of his own, not even a rented flat, yet shows off and pay for unsolicited bills to impress his ancestors? Girl, sit him down and tell him to stop it and that this time, it's final. If he continues, flee no matter how hurt you'll feel. That nigga is the unserious type.

[quote author=Tattooboy post=31439064]. He shud limit goin out wit several pple. Spendin on drinks is a real turn off 4 me tho.[/quote
i have tried 2 stop it bt it looks like it didn't work

sinizia:


He's 31-years-old? Doesn't have a place of his own, not even a rented flat, yet shows off and pay for unsolicited bills to impress his ancestors? Girl, sit him down and tell him to stop it and that this time, it's final. If he continues, flee no matter how hurt you'll feel. That nigga is the unserious type.

i have tried talking 2 him bt he seems not 2 heed 2 any

A drunk and a womanizer hardly have savings.Threaten him you would quit the relationship if doesn't turn a new leaf.If he truly loves you he should yield except if he prefers spending on his bottles than keeping his love.

Blizzyblinkzy:


i told him abt dat but he promised 2 change and till this day he hasn't changed

[quote author=Blizzyblinkzy post=31439118][/quote] I can't fathom out while u'r wit sum1 dat doesn't listenin 2 u.

Blizzyblinkzy:

i have tried talking 2 him bt he seems not 2 heed 2 any

Like someone advised, if he can't let you manage his finances, quit!!

Does he make his money genuinely? Or he's a 'yahoo boy'? Cos any guys who sweats and work tirelessly to earn a living don't engage in a spending spree when he has a lot to do with money! If you cannot tame him, u take a bow n exit before he goes bankrupt. Trust me, when he does, people will tag you the architect of his misfortune. OP, a stitch in time saves nine and tell ur bf to make hay while d sun shines!

Blizzyblinkzy:
Good evening.. Nairalnders.. Help a fellow nairalnder..


I have been dating this guy close 2 a year and i don't like d way he spends money.. He spends money on things that ain't necessary and do abandon d necessary ones.. I have tried talking 2 him abt it bt he just continue telling me he would change

we do go out with family and friends.. And when its tym 2 settle d bills he's d one that normally pay for it... The one that is giving me more concern.. He doesn't have a place of his own.. He stays with his friend and he's not getting any younger this year will make him 31 although he still looks young.. He promised 2 get a place last yr bt something came up.. He was expecting his goods worth 3.8 million bt it was seized by customs.. Although it gave him sleepless nyt bt dat doesn't stopped him from spending unnecessarily.. As am typing dis there are some necessary things he stills needs money for apart from this ones i mention bt he doesn't pay attention 2 them.

Am really concerned and am trying 2 change him bt i don't knw hw 2 go abt it.

Plssss matured advice as needed here.. No insults i beg una

Me think you are the sole reason he is spending any how....if it should be only when he is having financial problem you have to stop asking him for money,sorry to say,it too bad of you....

If you really care about him...why don't you use the same method you normally use to collect money from him..and start collecting his money little by little and use the money to look for a place for him....a wise woman should know this tactics..unless she isn't concerned about the future...rather than to collect money from his partner and spend it anyhow...

Why am I having this feeling that both of you are getting old and you are afraid he isn't ready to propose yet,and because you want your wedding to be awww...now you are concerned about his spending....

Btw,we don't want to know about the amount of his goods...that amount can barely take care of my family for a month....

Final punch...if you can think of ways in which you can collect his money,and yet you can't think of a simple way to help him manage his money its pathetic....

sinizia:


Like someone advised, if he can't let you manage his finances, quit!!

Quiting is not the solution to everything.. even if you dont end up marrying him, you can still help impact on his life positively.. Instead of just complaining and telling him to change, i feel there are some womanly things you can do to force the hand of a man that truly loves you.. like you said he still stays with his friend and you probably go visit him there and spend the night there perhaps.. when you stop visiting him and insist you will only come when he gets a place of his own.. maybe then he'll sit down and think about getting his.. etc etc

kevinberry:

Me think you are the sole reason he is spending any how....if it should be only when he is having financial problem you have to stop asking him for money,sorry to say,it too bad of you....

If you really care about him...why don't you use the same method you normally use to collect money from him..and start collecting his money little by little and use the money to look for a place for him....a wise woman should know this tactics..unless she isn't concerned about the future...rather than to collect money from his partner and spend it anyhow...

Why am I having this feeling that both of you are getting old and you are afraid he isn't ready to propose yet,and because you want your wedding to be awww...now you are concerned about his spending....

Btw,we don't want to know about the amount of his goods...that amount can barely take care of my family for a month....

Final punch...if you can think of ways in which you can collect his money,and yet you can't think of a simple way to help him manage his money its pathetic....

and nobody cares if that amount can take of your family for a month or not.. we dont want to know that either.. but i agree with some of the reasonable things you said..

Blizzyblinkzy:

since when he had a problem last year.. I stopped collecting money 4rm him... He spends more on drinks .. He doesn't mind buying 4 everyone.. We went out yesterday he did same.. Even 2day

hmmmmmm no one will ever support a man who spend on drinks more than any other thing.
Is obvious is an addict, you need to threaten him to stop spending too much on drinks or you will end the relationship. Going like this he can turn 50 without a place of his own.



You said you stopped collecting money from him, no girl can stop that unless she break up with the guy or he is damn broke.

pwerrymansion:
Does he make his money genuinely? Or he's a 'yahoo boy'? Cos any guys who sweats and work tirelessly to earn a living don't engage in a spending spree when he has a lot to do with money! If you cannot tame him, u take a bow n exit before he goes bankrupt. Trust me, when he does, people will tag you the architect of his misfortune. OP, a stitch in time saves nine and tell ur bf to make hay while d sun shines!

I think the op is one of them em gullible gurls. At 31 he is yet to have his own space nd op he has a 3.8 worth of goods sized by some phantom custom..nice lies.. Why was the yeye goods held if i may ask? That nigure is broke and his friends contributes money together for shayo and make it look like he is the one footing the bill. Trust guys, we do that to help the less successful ones in our groups. Op shine ur eyes.

Venom104:


and nobody cares if that amount can take of your family for a month or not.. we dont want to know that either.. but i agree with some of the reasonable things you said..

Thanks...I was expecting the op to quote me...now am more disappointed

Op has been dating a kid. 31 yrs still living with afriend? What has he been doing?

kevinberry:

Thanks...I was expecting the op to quote me...now am more disappointed

sorry to disappoint you buddy...

@Op, He' above 30 without future plans?
Babe, get out now or stay, your choice!

You r not his financial banker or adviser.
Infact whatever you say or do regarding his spending habits will only make him (secretly) resent you. This will put a strain on the already fragile relationship.

If you choose to stay with a grown man incapable of making his own decisions then just love him and hope 'one day' he will 'hmm' come to his senses.

On the other hand...
'A woman's best protection is a little money of her own.'

Restrategise:
Focus on getting your shit together.
Make your own gawddamn money and move forward with or without him.

Trying to control anoda human being will drain you of EvERYTHING. Emotionally. Financially. Physically. Time waits for no woman.

My own opinion! Chew on it! Make a decision that will keep you and your man happy.

Vote wisely.

Tattooboy:
. He shud limit goin out wit several pple. Spendin on drinks is a real turn off 4 me tho.

You be woman?

redcliff:


You be woman?

. It means i dont like it

life wll teach him lessons

falconey:
hmmmmmm no one will ever support a man who spend on drinks more than any other thing.
Is obvious is an addict, you need to threaten him to stop spending too much on drinks or you will end the relationship. Going like this he can turn 50 without a place of his own.



You said you stopped collecting money from him, no girl can stop that unless she break up with the guy or he is damn broke.

Thanks 4 ur advise.



U don't just say no gal can stop collecting money 4rm a guy except he is broke.. I don't depend on guys and i have never done that .. My parents are always there 4 me.. Am not d demanding type.. if u wish 2 give me fine. If u don't wish fine .. We are still together

kevinberry:

Me think you are the sole reason he is spending any how....if it should be only when he is having financial problem you have to stop asking him for money,sorry to say,it too bad of you....

If you really care about him...why don't you use the same method you normally use to collect money from him..and start collecting his money little by little and use the money to look for a place for him....a wise woman should know this tactics..unless she isn't concerned about the future...rather than to collect money from his partner and spend it anyhow...

Why am I having this feeling that both of you are getting old and you are afraid he isn't ready to propose yet,and because you want your wedding to be awww...now you are concerned about his spending....

Btw,we don't want to know about the amount of his goods...that amount can barely take care of my family for a month....

Final punch...if you can think of ways in which you can collect his money,and yet you can't think of a simple way to help him manage his money its pathetic....

i don't ask him 4 money bt he do gives me.. I don't depend on guys cos my parents are there 4 me..


In d nxt 5 years 2 come whether am married or single (bt i don't pray 2 be single ) i will still be as young as ever without changes by Gods grace.

Thank God u could barely feed ur family with 3.8 million i would have say i wish 2 be like u bt i don't know d source of ur income..

final punch too.. I do appreciate ur advise.. And i will try my best by makin him the best..

sinizia:


Like someone advised, if he can't let you manage his finances, quit!!

thanks 4 ur advise.. Bt is ain't easy quitting a relationship.. I will try my best

Blizzyblinkzy:

since when he had a problem last year.. I stopped collecting money 4rm him... He spends more on drinks .. He doesn't mind buying 4 everyone.. We went out yesterday he did same.. Even 2day

he is a popping guy!
run!

Venom104:



Quiting is not the solution to everything.. even if you dont end up marrying him, you can still help impact on his life positively.. Instead of just complaining and telling him to change, i feel there are some womanly things you can do to force the hand of a man that truly loves you.. like you said he still stays with his friend and you probably go visit him there and spend the night there perhaps.. when you stop visiting him and insist you will only come when he gets a place of his own.. maybe then he'll sit down and think about getting his.. etc etc

wow! I love dis advise real much