I peeped into the front row seat, a newspaper was on. “Abi dem don dey book space with newspaper again,” I said. Everyone in the car laughed. They were laughing, I wasn’t. It wasn’t funny, I need to be in Abuja before the end of the day. One of the workers in the park dragged me to a corner and began explaining to me that all seats had been filled. And the man at the front seat that I was talking with that look like osama, he’s a favourite customer. Each time he’s travelling, he usually buys 2 seats in front just for convenience. He seats in one and his newspaper on the other one. But that day, he bought 3. Two in front and one behind. He kept a small pulse on the seat behind, while he and his newspaper occupied the front seat.

I looked at the worker as he explained. The tangled hair on his head caught my attention. They looked like pawpaw seeds as he was explained; they were just story for the angels to believe. So passengers don dey book seat for their newspaper sef. Then, I wished I became an angel, or even a wizard that can fly. I needed to be in FCT that day. As I was there contemplating on what to do, the third bus had already started moving gradually, leaving the park. With my bag filled with unripe plantain and crayfish meant for my wife’s landlord in Abuja. I carried the bag and heading towards the gate. The third bus had finally left the park. I believed no car in any park would be going to Abuja that kind of time. My best bet was to leave and come back early enough the next morning.

As I left the park, on getting outside, I saw that the third bus had stopped. One of the passengers waved at me to come. “Wetin dem wan tell me,” I thought to myself. I felt they wanted to mock me again. With grudges i moved towards them. “Hurry up na,” the driver shouted. “Hurry up keh. Where I dey hurry dey go! The car wey no carry me na im I dey hurry go meet,” I said. I got there and the driver said that the Osama man has said I should take the space of his pulse behind him, so I can join the bus. The osama man said that I must carry his pulse till we get to our destination. Well, I looked at it. What was there in carrying a pulse! is it not to just carry it on my palms till we get to Abuja. “Of course I can do it,” I said to him as other passengers laughed. “I have valuables worth over a million naira so be careful and I don’t want anything missing,” the Osama man said. So because you get over millions of naira inside one pulse, person no go hear word. I began wondering, if he was so rich, why not take a plane to Abuja. Infact how come that kind of small pulse has about a million naira.” I wondered.

Na so I join the car oo come Carry the man pulse.

We were approaching Lokoja when the Osama man asked the driver to stop that he was pressed and want to urinate. The driver told him to exercise a little patience so we enter Lokoja fully so for those who would want to eat will do that and some other things. The Osama man refused entirely and threatened to urinate inside the car if the driver doesn’t stop. Some other passengers asked him to exercise a little patience, we were almost at Lokoja. The place we were was not comfortable enough, with the people selling snacks and other items. But Osama man no gree. The driver had to stop and he got down. We waited as he went to urinate. Na so this man urinate finish, he no wan come in again. He went to where they are selling gala. We were still waiting and patient. Na so this man was moving from store to store looking for gala. Passengers inside the car began complaining. Because there was gala virtually in all the stores. The driver went out of the car approaching him.

“Oga, wetin you dey find,” the driver said.

“Na gala I wan buy,” the osama man replied.

On hearing that, most of us in the car became vexed.

“So na gala this man dey find wey he just keep us hear since dey wait,” a female passenger screamed. “No be gala full everywhere so. Abi na another kind of gala from heaven him dey find!” Another passenger said. The driver wasn’t that happy anymore.

Driver--- Oga, buy wetin you wan buy make we begin move na.

Osama man--- I never see original one.

Chaiii, se me see wahala ooo. Shey gala dey get fake!

Driver--- no be gala full every were soo.

Osama man – all those ones no get NAFDAC number. Some sef don expire sef.

On hearing this, everyone in the car busted into laughter. “Na dis one we come enter today!” the woman behind me said. The osama man was determined to get his original gala. He was moving from one shop to another. When he picks up any gala, he checks the label for expiry date, he drops and checks another. If it doesn’t please him, he drops it and moves into another shop.

The driver was obviously angry. He threatened to leave him and go. But the osama man was still adamant. He told the driver to leave if he wants. Me never see character like this since I start to dey board car.

Finally, after minutes of waiting, the Osama man was trekking back to the car with a gala. I guessed he was able to see the one with SON, NAFDAC number which has not expired. I began to wonder, so after the long wait. Na only one gala N50 he buy. Immediately he entered the car, he began giving foolish apology. No one responded to him. “Make una come chop oo” he said as he tore open the gala. No one responded. I wondered, “shey na N50 gala all of us inside car go come share chop?” I thought to myself. why is he calling us to come eat gala.

We got to the main town, Lokoja. We got down at one of the eateries to eat and get some other few things. After about 30minutes of the eating’s, buying’s and all, the driver came back and passengers started coming into the car. Na so we begin to wait for Osama man oo. “Where is he! Where has he gone to?” we wondered. Or is it not the same eatery we entered to eat! After about 25minutes of wait, we sighted the Osama across the other side of the road prizing banana. The driver was so angry that he asked those who were yet to come into the car to come in. He drove to the other side to meet the Osama man. The driver asked him to come inside that there was no time, and we had been waiting for him. “Abeg make una wait joor. These plantain no ripe. I dey find soft fine plantain,” the Osama man screamed. Everyone in the car began shouting at him to get into the car, he was wasting our time. I began regretting entering that car. I should have obeyed my other voice in me that told me to stay back and travel the next day.

Na so we wait for the Osama man till he bought his N150 banana. He also said he wanted to poo. He went back to the eatery and spent about 30minutes. I guessed he was releasing all he had ate since 2 weeks. “I can’t wait for our car to get to Jabi for me to get down and leave.

The car got to Jabi in Abuja, some of us stopped there. As I was getting down, I dropped the pulse the Osama man gave to me on the seat I left and thanked him. He immediately came down of his seat and asked me to wait that he wants to search his pulse to confirm if everything was intact and nothing was missing. I didn’t bother waiting or even listened as he called me. I just took my bag, find a taxi and left. Person no get rest of mind say one Mr Osama dey inside car.
http://www.hovabuzz.com/frontline/965-the-day-i-travelled-with-osama-my-weird-experience