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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / The Good Wife By Nigeria Standards (pic) (32974 Views)
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Re: The Good Wife By Nigeria Standards (pic) by bukatyne(f): 12:57pm On Mar 19, 2015 |
Timbuktou: The wife is the head of the home if she outearns or earns equally with the husband ![]() What will you do if your wife gets a very good job today and outearns you? 2 Likes |
Re: The Good Wife By Nigeria Standards (pic) by Nobody: 1:04pm On Mar 19, 2015 |
SirShymexx: You cannot proffer a practical solution if you fail to understand where we are coming from. I am not asking you to be a woman I only ask you to try to view it from our perspective. I mentioned earlier that you grew up in a normal family. Most people were not that lucky especially back home in Nigeria. If for example my female cousins grow up to hate men, I would blame their parents especially their dads I agree that women are the backbone of the society but that does not mean they do not need help. We also need help just like everyone. You need to understand them first and be willing to help them to achieve their purpose. I am neither a feminist nor a misogynist but I have realised that over time we are all to be blamed with men taking more of it for failing to adapt to today's society. Men are no longer the sole providers and for the sake of the family, both have to work together to make a home. 1 Like |
Re: The Good Wife By Nigeria Standards (pic) by bukatyne(f): 1:05pm On Mar 19, 2015 |
SirShymexx: They abound. I know two of my colleagues who stayed put because their husbands do not want them to leave their current jobs (aka earning higher or near them). The men are top flyers in their fields too. Read a story here of a woman whose husband asked her to resign from her job to care for the kids. The last child was mature enough to plead with the mother to keep her home so you understand that caring for the kids was not the real issue. I think the major clash here is difference in culture... I see women beaten everyday, you see men set up daily and volia! we cannot relate because we are not looking at the same things. What the OP portrays is very real around here and it does not depict a weak man, it depicts a overburdened wife. 4 Likes |
Re: The Good Wife By Nigeria Standards (pic) by Misogynist2014(m): 1:11pm On Mar 19, 2015 |
Welcome to the world where men are tagged as being abusive and women victim. The fact still remain that men contribute most in 70% of homes in Nigeria. This nuisance has to stop, I'm the head of my household, no one's view is acceptable, I run it the way I deem feet (when married). Lazy, rebellious and ungrateful women. Spits on the ground. ![]() |
Re: The Good Wife By Nigeria Standards (pic) by DollyParton1(f): 1:41pm On Mar 19, 2015 |
Timbuktou:Selfishness is the problem here. No one is saying they want to divide the house chores with you. We simply saying your wives will appreciate it if you help them occasionally. Please dont let me repeat myself, we are talking about an average naija family Mr, not you and your wife. 1 Like |
Re: The Good Wife By Nigeria Standards (pic) by Nobody: 1:46pm On Mar 19, 2015 |
DollyParton1:The average naija family should be run like my home. And btw, I help out from time to time, and in fact, I bathe our son everyday! Because I choose to. What I'm saying is women have no business demanding their husbands do chores. If hubby is led by the spirit to help out, no problemo. |
Re: The Good Wife By Nigeria Standards (pic) by Nobody: 1:48pm On Mar 19, 2015 |
bukatyne:The wife is the head if she calls the shots in the home, even if the husband earns more ![]() my wife could be as rich as Alakija for all I care. I'm ze boss baby. She don't like it, she can bounce and I get a newer model. |
Re: The Good Wife By Nigeria Standards (pic) by Nobody: 1:51pm On Mar 19, 2015 |
DollyParton1:Any man who has to "need" his wife's money to run his home should have a vacuum cleaner cellotaped to his butt. I don't speak for all men. I speak for men who choose to lead their lives as men were created to. And the only overwhelming my wife is allowed to report to me is in the sack where we're getting it on. I didn't send her to go to Isale Eko. When I lift my rod she best be parting the red sea ![]() |
Re: The Good Wife By Nigeria Standards (pic) by DollyParton1(f): 1:51pm On Mar 19, 2015 |
Timbuktou:Now the stories are changing. I can see through your bullshit. Where on this thread did u see anyone demand their husbands to do chores. And no, an average nigerian home can't be run like yours, unlike u who claim not to need their wife's financial support, some men do. And it doesn't reduce the size of their dìćk 3 Likes |
Re: The Good Wife By Nigeria Standards (pic) by Nobody: 1:54pm On Mar 19, 2015 |
DollyParton1:Oh, yes, I control my wife. Parents should not control their children? We're done here. Goodbye. |
Re: The Good Wife By Nigeria Standards (pic) by DollyParton1(f): 1:54pm On Mar 19, 2015 |
Timbuktou:lol.... Like we dont see such cases around. so when a man couldn't get a job in this present day nigeria, but their wife could get a good paying one, that man better go hang himself innit. You got jokes..... am tempted to question ur age. 3 Likes |
Re: The Good Wife By Nigeria Standards (pic) by DollyParton1(f): 1:56pm On Mar 19, 2015 |
Timbuktou:I think you have issues with English or something. So parents should control children. Dang!!! Did we just regress to the 17th century or something. 3 Likes |
Re: The Good Wife By Nigeria Standards (pic) by Nobody: 1:59pm On Mar 19, 2015 |
DollyParton1:So you believed all the tales he has been feeding you? ![]() 1 Like |
Re: The Good Wife By Nigeria Standards (pic) by DollyParton1(f): 2:02pm On Mar 19, 2015 |
Sophyrocks:Well I have seen men who reason like him in real life. They are everywhere. 1 Like |
Re: The Good Wife By Nigeria Standards (pic) by Nobody: 2:03pm On Mar 19, 2015 |
DollyParton1:my English is fine. It's your orientation that needs a reconfiguration. Apparently, you are neither married nor have kids. Seriously, I really don't want to debate this issue with you any further. When you've got your kids, feel free to let them make all their decisions on their own. Peace. |
Re: The Good Wife By Nigeria Standards (pic) by Nobody: 2:05pm On Mar 19, 2015 |
DollyParton1:Oh, I'm 12, 13 next year. I'm beginning to doubt your comprehension ability, your age and your level of exposure. |
Re: The Good Wife By Nigeria Standards (pic) by Nobody: 2:07pm On Mar 19, 2015 |
DollyParton1:What stories are changing? Understanding is not one of your merits apparently. |
Re: The Good Wife By Nigeria Standards (pic) by iykedare(m): 2:11pm On Mar 19, 2015 |
That pic is so respectful to the typical naija man. Have some respect for the men,haba. The remedy to these kind of aggression from the typical black woman is some serious dicking. |
Re: The Good Wife By Nigeria Standards (pic) by pickabeau1: 2:16pm On Mar 19, 2015 |
DollyParton1: How many families have u seen where the woman is the chief breadwinner bukatyne: How many families have u seen where the woman is the chief breadwinner How many have u seen where the woman is overburdened |
Re: The Good Wife By Nigeria Standards (pic) by bukatyne(f): 2:21pm On Mar 19, 2015 |
pickabeau1: @bold, you really don't mean that Until we all acknowledge the problem, there will be no solution 1 Like |
Re: The Good Wife By Nigeria Standards (pic) by pickabeau1: 2:24pm On Mar 19, 2015 |
bukatyne: As usual.. always dodging questions You lot come here and say typical typical Is it happening in your marriage .............. you lot will say NO Is it or Did it happen in your parents marriage..........you lot will say NO Is it or Did it happen in your siblings marriage................you lot will say NO Then you will say NO where are these bad marriages If its happening elsewhere BUT not in your environs... Then why do u come online and say typical typical 2 Likes |
Re: The Good Wife By Nigeria Standards (pic) by bukatyne(f): 2:37pm On Mar 19, 2015 |
pickabeau1: Always dodging... can I see some posts where I dodged? I like proof you know ![]() So it does not happen in my marriage means it does not happen else where or it means I should close my eyes to what I see? 1 Like |
Re: The Good Wife By Nigeria Standards (pic) by iamrealdeji(m): 2:40pm On Mar 19, 2015 |
BeeBeeOoh:Yes just like GEJ is the wife to PEJ |
Re: The Good Wife By Nigeria Standards (pic) by iykedare(m): 2:45pm On Mar 19, 2015 |
pickabeau1: lol Don't mind these women here. 2 Likes |
Re: The Good Wife By Nigeria Standards (pic) by pickabeau1: 2:46pm On Mar 19, 2015 |
bukatyne: So what is your frame of reference If your sphere of influence does not have men who are tied of their wives' aprons so what is the correlation to say this is a typical Nigerian marriage im sure you know what typical means having the distinctive qualities of a particular type of person or thing. If it is typical, that means a lot of females are also having these kind of marriages.... |
Re: The Good Wife By Nigeria Standards (pic) by BeeBeeOoh(m): 2:57pm On Mar 19, 2015 |
Re: The Good Wife By Nigeria Standards (pic) by SirShymexx: 3:03pm On Mar 19, 2015 |
bukatyne: - Well, cash rules everything - he who he who pays the piper calls the tune. And it's always about money, power, and respect - with money controlling the other two. So, no matter how you twist it - that's the premise of the traditional African families, hence there's always more pressure on male children than their female counterparts. Also, if you're going to be honest: it isn't uncommon in families to see women who're the primary providers having more leverage in decision making. That's normal and it happens naturally. - All the African cultures I'm acquainted with do pay pride price. I know of the Yorubas and I've seen the ridiculous lists by the Igbos on this forum several times. How about apply gender equality to that and let the females also pay "groom price" - or just do away with the whole thing, if you lot are sincere about evolution? What's good for the goose is good for the gander. Any married woman who had a bride price paid for her has no moral right to compain about being asked to be submissive since the husband already paid for that - and she owes him. - Slimyem's post is all over the place with neither a head nor tail. For the average Nigerian man not to want a "liability" - that shows he's progressive minded. However, only lazy women complain about doing chores cos if they were living by themselves - they'd do them. Then again, some women are just dirty and lazy - hence a lot of them always get obese after marriage. They just want to sit their ar.ses down and munch all the available food. Also, decision making is mostly dependent on financial contributions to the family - and that role most times, falls solely on the men. That's the societal standard for the breadwinner. - Err, when western society was booming - from the industrial revolution age to let's say the 70s and 80s - the women allowed men to control everything and they looked after the homes, while being progressive (in terms of education, sacrifices, and other things). They were hardworkers. However, since the arrival of ultra-feminism, there has been a sharp decline in western societies - and in the next 20 years, it's going to be a disaster with countries from the eastern ideology taking over. UK and the entire Eurozone is on the decline - ditto America. Is that worth emulating especially for a country like Nigeria that's perpetually in abyss? Why not start from where where western societies were during the industrial revolution, when the women were ultra-supportive and not belligerent? On the flipside, Nigeria's case is a case of backward women who don't even know what they want...and men who have so much pressure on them - while co-existing within a retrogressive and non-functional system. Both parties have to make sacrifices. |
Re: The Good Wife By Nigeria Standards (pic) by pickabeau1: 3:26pm On Mar 19, 2015 |
iykedare: Everybody's marriage is good yet Nigerian marriages are bad |
Re: The Good Wife By Nigeria Standards (pic) by damiso(f): 3:38pm On Mar 19, 2015 |
While the pic depicted might be true in some cases and is some marriages I am of the opinion its not necessarily a Nigerian or African thing. Women generally tend to do most of the chores, caring, nuturing etc regardless if whether they work outside the home and this is in most parts of the world even so called western societies. Hardly 3 months goes by without one report or the other in the UK highlighting how women still do the bulk of household chores despite also working and contributing to the household purse. Just yesterday I was reading an article in a paper where it was implied that if men want a better s.ex life they need to help out more with chores . Guess what the writer was a white middle class 'independent'(abi what will a magazine editor be) woman. Go on netmums, mumsnet etc and see threads upon threads of white educated women moaning on how their husbands or partners still expect them to do majority of the chores.Heck there is even a Boots tv advert depicting two obviously ill working white women still doing chores while their husbands did nothing. I used to also think white men or western men were definitely more open to chores than our own men but living and interacting with people of all cultures has kinda shifted that view.Some of the worst 'traditionalist ' or men who think 'women belong in the kitchen' are white middle class men. Yes they exist in 2015. Chauvinists, gold diggers, misogynsts, misandryists etc are not the preserve of African or Nigerians. http://www.mumsnet.com/surveys/chores-the-truth-about-who-does-what 3 Likes 1 Share |
Re: The Good Wife By Nigeria Standards (pic) by pickabeau1: 4:14pm On Mar 19, 2015 |
^^^ finally someone who lives in the same Western 'paradise' (as some of our ladies here put it) and can say it for what it is Too many ladies here just assume abroad - everything is dandy ![]() Too much naija men bashing Don't we have white trash abroad Don't we have white people on benefits? Yet sell these girls abroad is utopia and they flock like moths to the flame Rather than male bashing which is orgasmic for some here the focus should be on improving male participation And for those who want to know how much of a topical issue distribution of chores still is...even in the UK http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-206381/Working-women-housework.html Working women 'still do housework 'by ROBIN YAPP, Daily Mail |
Re: The Good Wife By Nigeria Standards (pic) by Nobody: 4:24pm On Mar 19, 2015 |
pickabeau1:In the words of MI, Rita Lori chick forming Rita Ora ![]() Baba, I'm thinking of instituting a NL kitchen where all these women can arrange the younger girls to be cooking tasty meals while we argue here. We need to replenish our energy somehow. ![]() |
Re: The Good Wife By Nigeria Standards (pic) by pickabeau1: 4:29pm On Mar 19, 2015 |
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Timbuktou: As in... The cooking thing is a big issue You see cats who don't blink an eyelid getting into bed with their boyfriends but wil growl when you tell them to cook or clean up Cleaning is more stressful than sex ![]() You find it easier to get n@ked than cook.... choi Seriously I ask again every naija man is bad yet our resident femmes just happen to have good fathers, husbands, brothers who are the exception If everyone's man is the exception, who are the bad naija men ![]() |
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