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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / Babyosisi's Marital Advice To New And Intended Wives (269963 Views)
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Re: Babyosisi's Marital Advice To New And Intended Wives by Nobody: 9:07pm On Mar 18, 2015 |
xklassic: It is her choice really Let her do what makes her comfortable. If you marry a baby daddy or a divorcee,a widow or widower ,you are going into the union with some fair amount of baggage and as long as she is aware and prepared to handle the complexity that comes with such,she should be ok I wonder why a woman will be alive and allow the family of a man who didn't pay a dime on her head to collect a baby she carried in her womb Amubeghi that man IMHO 2 Likes |
Re: Babyosisi's Marital Advice To New And Intended Wives by veave(f): 11:06pm On Mar 18, 2015 |
gleatz: Thanks dearie. 1 Like |
Re: Babyosisi's Marital Advice To New And Intended Wives by Ngokafor(f): 11:24pm On Mar 18, 2015 |
...What an interesting thread..i don read tire. ...agreed and disagreed with some comments but all in all its been quite educating to say the least.. ..@babyosisi and all who contributed meaningfully and maturely..una well-done.. 2 Likes |
Re: Babyosisi's Marital Advice To New And Intended Wives by Nobody: 11:52pm On Mar 18, 2015 |
veave:Sorry dear. |
Re: Babyosisi's Marital Advice To New And Intended Wives by veave(f): 1:48am On Mar 19, 2015 |
Re: Babyosisi's Marital Advice To New And Intended Wives by justi4jesu(f): 3:17am On Mar 19, 2015 |
dinachi: 3 Likes |
Re: Babyosisi's Marital Advice To New And Intended Wives by prissyluv(f): 11:53am On Mar 19, 2015 |
Wow. I am still learning day by day from this thread. Thanks to our amiable contributors and initiator of this thread,Aunty babyosisi. Una well done ooo! My friend/sis is in need. There is this guy who loves her and ready to marry her once she says yes but the problem is that the man converse mostly in their dialect. Sometime last year,she told him that she will like them to be talking more with English,he obliged but when he speaks,sometimes he mixes some tenses up. She said they hardly have a lenghty conversation in English.This alone is putting her off. The guy is a graduate. |
Re: Babyosisi's Marital Advice To New And Intended Wives by Nobody: 12:15pm On Mar 19, 2015 |
prissyluv:This sounds kinda funny to me. Should that even be a problem at all since they are of the same tribe? What's her reason for preferring a conversation in English to a conversation in their dialect? 3 Likes |
Re: Babyosisi's Marital Advice To New And Intended Wives by prissyluv(f): 12:26pm On Mar 19, 2015 |
delightful1:She has the fear that he is not so good in English speaking. Can such people hold talks in public forum without embarrassing you? In a gathering of friends,wont he speak something that will make you bow your head...? 2 Likes |
Re: Babyosisi's Marital Advice To New And Intended Wives by kenny987(f): 12:29pm On Mar 19, 2015 |
ichidodo: Some have 'accused' you of being mechanical but honestly, I think it's a straightforward and forthright way of doing things. That way, everyone knows what's what and then all d romance and fun can and will happen because a good foundation has been laid and there's a goal to work towards. At 26, unless she's particularly slow, then she already knows what she wants and she has said as much. If it causes u sleepless nights and nightmares then do yourself a favour and take a bow now. If the impending baggage you see from her family will cause difficulties for you and potential wahala all around then as igbos will say, "were ire guo eze gi onu=Use your tongue to count your teeth". When you count finish, if e pass your power...do the needful. In other words look before you leap and don't 'overlook'! You'd think having had a hard life, father dying early and all, she'd be eager to gain some financial independence but what do I know? To each his own. 3 Likes |
Re: Babyosisi's Marital Advice To New And Intended Wives by ichidodo: 1:29pm On Mar 19, 2015 |
kenny987:Much appreciated, ma'am. |
Re: Babyosisi's Marital Advice To New And Intended Wives by xklassic: 1:38pm On Mar 19, 2015 |
babyosisi:. According to the man, he said, she gave up the baby willingly so as to finish up her studies. |
Re: Babyosisi's Marital Advice To New And Intended Wives by Nobody: 1:55pm On Mar 19, 2015 |
ichidodo... after 11 years you're still finding it hard making a decision? Hasn't she been like this all these yl or you held on thinking she would change or what?? 11years is too much time already, please make your decision quick so that no much time will be wasted again... The 4year plan thing though. .. why didn't you do it all along? why now?? Someone you have been with for 11years.. 11years is more than enough time to know the person well and make your decision. . If 11years yielded nothing, I really don't see 4years making any difference... All the best... 11 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Babyosisi's Marital Advice To New And Intended Wives by urchbarbie(f): 2:02pm On Mar 19, 2015 |
Gbam! U hit nail on d head. The lady wld just create a thread on nl 'help we dated for 11yrs and broke up cos of his 4 yrs plan........now am 30. What do i do?' thats the latest trend on nl. Threads and its replies MarvellousGod: |
Re: Babyosisi's Marital Advice To New And Intended Wives by thorpido(m): 2:50pm On Mar 19, 2015 |
@ichidodo,if you're not a preacher hoping to marry this lady who wants to be a 'preacher's wife',then i guess both of you are not meant for each other.At 26yrs,she's not too young to know what she wants and she seems to have settled with the position of being a man's supporter. It's obviously not what you want from what you have written.You want a lady that is also career driven.Both of you don't seem to fit each other. I would say you both have conversations concerning this(i know she's been evasive) and see how it works out.It doesn't need a 4yr plan.You both should have reached a decision in the next couple of weeks. 4 Likes |
Re: Babyosisi's Marital Advice To New And Intended Wives by kputus: 3:09pm On Mar 19, 2015 |
ichidodo: The baggage is suppose to motivate her to work or do a business so as to be financially independent and not be a financial burden to someone. Btw are you a minister or intending to be one? |
Re: Babyosisi's Marital Advice To New And Intended Wives by ichidodo: 3:13pm On Mar 19, 2015 |
MarvellousGod: MarvellousGod:C'mon..I also have something to lose as per 11 years down the drain...is it not my 11 years too? And remember we've had prolonged intervals of separations so it isn't a continous 11 year relationship therefore she must have had her fair share of side affairs. Look, i just don't want to make any situation worse than it needs to be.Besides, i'm just putting down a game plan, a road map to something beautiful for the team here.All we need is a bit of faith,dedication and comittment to each other but if she's all about herself,her age,her time and not 'we' then she's not worth the trouble how much less the marriage.Let mi ask, what is wrong if a lady gets to 30?,I mean what if she leaves mi and maybe due to relationship misfortunes gets to 30,what next?...heavens won't fall,i know it won't |
Re: Babyosisi's Marital Advice To New And Intended Wives by ichidodo: 3:24pm On Mar 19, 2015 |
kputus:Not cut out for that kind of thing...she just got caught up in some brainwashings by one firebrand student fellowship pastor at Uni who eventually sought to take advantage of her vulnerability. I blame her somewhat primitive mindset which you aptly connoted on that particular episode.. |
Re: Babyosisi's Marital Advice To New And Intended Wives by Nobody: 7:00pm On Mar 19, 2015 |
Re: Babyosisi's Marital Advice To New And Intended Wives by Nobody: 7:08pm On Mar 19, 2015 |
prissyluv: It is quite sad that a lot of Nigerian graduates speak and write very poorly nowadays When I hear some younger people speak or write,it leaves much to be desired.I guess the fallen standards has a lot to do with it. This goes to tell us that being a graduate may not be all that it is cut out to be. The young ladies earlier asking about marrying WAEC holders should then look at other parameters Does the young man express himself well? Is he confident in who he is? Can he interact well with people? @ the poster above,if she can't handle his poor English then she should let him go.Some people may not tolerate a man that will make them cringe when he speaks in public, I couldn't. Being able to express yourself well is important to me.I couldn't marry a man I would consider less intelligent than myself. 3 Likes |
Re: Babyosisi's Marital Advice To New And Intended Wives by Nobody: 7:10pm On Mar 19, 2015 |
delightful1: Wouldn't they interact with others? |
Re: Babyosisi's Marital Advice To New And Intended Wives by Nobody: 7:21pm On Mar 19, 2015 |
babyosisi:While you have a point, what happens to trying to be if help? If after all attempts she still isn't getting what she wants then she might choose to not be with him. I just feel since that's the only problem she has with him, they can do something about it. 3 Likes |
Re: Babyosisi's Marital Advice To New And Intended Wives by Nobody: 10:13pm On Mar 19, 2015 |
ichidodo:Ofcourse Sir, heavens won't fall neither will either of you sieze to exist but none of you will feel good about it. .. What I'm just trying to say is that if after 11years you still don't know whether you wish to marry this gal or not, then 4yrs won't decide for you. .. Besides is the 4year thing more like giving her a target or ultimatum or standard she must reach before you can consider marrying her?? Did both of you decide the four year thing together? Did she consent to it? Are you doing her a favour by marrying her? cos I really don't understand the 4year terms and conditions .. The four year deal will do nothing I tell you because if she's someone that's desperate for marriage, she can just pretend and keep to the terms just so you marry her. .Also, By now you should have known her well to make your decision or is there any other character of hers you think will manifest within these 4years? Bottomline: I don't think the 4year thing makes sense, You have known her long enough to make your decision. . or could it be you ain't ready for marriage now? Again, Goodluck 4 Likes |
Re: Babyosisi's Marital Advice To New And Intended Wives by Nobody: 10:14pm On Mar 19, 2015 |
urchbarbie:Stories that touch... |
Re: Babyosisi's Marital Advice To New And Intended Wives by urchbarbie(f): 10:31pm On Mar 19, 2015 |
U knw d drill MarvellousGod: |
Re: Babyosisi's Marital Advice To New And Intended Wives by Nobody: 11:20pm On Mar 19, 2015 |
Good evening everybody. I'm very happy today. Happy weekend everybody. Babyosisi I'm very very happy today. Good evening ma. 1 Like |
Re: Babyosisi's Marital Advice To New And Intended Wives by Nobody: 11:22pm On Mar 19, 2015 |
Herzumpther:Hmmm... I smell Good news Glad you are happy 1 Like |
Re: Babyosisi's Marital Advice To New And Intended Wives by Nobody: 11:23pm On Mar 19, 2015 |
Herzumpther: Has Jehovah done it for us? Praiiiiiiiiiiiise master Jesus Amem? |
Re: Babyosisi's Marital Advice To New And Intended Wives by cococandy(f): 11:24pm On Mar 19, 2015 |
Herzumpther: See me don dey happy too. Abeg spill. We could use some good news. 1 Like |
Re: Babyosisi's Marital Advice To New And Intended Wives by Nobody: 11:25pm On Mar 19, 2015 |
Herz we have all bought our e-asho ebi Please gist us |
Re: Babyosisi's Marital Advice To New And Intended Wives by Nobody: 11:29pm On Mar 19, 2015 |
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