Stats: 3,188,864 members, 7,935,699 topics. Date: Friday, 30 August 2024 at 01:52 PM |
Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / Pls Help!! My Wife Fought With My Mother Following A Quarrel. What Should I Do? (67119 Views)
My Wife Spat On My Face This Morning, What Should I Do? / Wife Asks Our Son To Beat Me Up Anytime We Quarrel —pastor Tells Court / Re; My Wife Fought With My Mum Following A Quarrel. My Own Opinion. (2) (3) (4)
(1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10) ... (28) (Reply) (Go Down)
Re: Pls Help!! My Wife Fought With My Mother Following A Quarrel. What Should I Do? by Rotiix(m): 8:38am On Mar 28, 2015 |
I just imagine what could have warranted your wife to leave scratches on your mum out of a brawl, you still have a dad? I wonder how your relatives will feel. Btw, did u meet your mannerless wife in a club or something. Its a pity when men trivialize the importance of the woman who brought and raised them up all in the name of pleasing their non-tolerant wives! 4 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Pls Help!! My Wife Fought With My Mother Following A Quarrel. What Should I Do? by zeeek(m): 8:39am On Mar 28, 2015 |
Dis kinda issues makes me very sad n angry @ d same time. -if I cannot hit my wife,den nobdy on d surface. Of dis earth shld. -if I cannt hit my mother,nobdy shld do dat. Only women undastnd each other,your wife definately has her reasons 4 refusing 2 Giv her d pictures,although I would hv prefered she directed my mum 2 me,knwing Dat I would hv discussed It wt her b4 giving out d pictures. I'll deal wt my wife seriously buh in my own way,as 4 my mum demanding dat she leaves my houz,who dash m dat kind authourity na? Jst play d peaace maker buh let your mum also knw dat she messed up. 5 Likes |
Re: Pls Help!! My Wife Fought With My Mother Following A Quarrel. What Should I Do? by Eljay24(m): 8:40am On Mar 28, 2015 |
Take the pisure and give to ur mother" since dats the cause of d problem. .. reprint another later, unless there's something u ain't telln us* I mean the real bone of contention" |
Re: Pls Help!! My Wife Fought With My Mother Following A Quarrel. What Should I Do? by malachee: 8:40am On Mar 28, 2015 |
Guy are you OK? Don't you know that after God is ur mother. Maybe is ur wife Dat is feeding u sha 3 Likes |
Re: Pls Help!! My Wife Fought With My Mother Following A Quarrel. What Should I Do? by gajike: 8:40am On Mar 28, 2015 |
No matter what for u to meet them in that situation u could have give ur wife a dirty 3 slap that could have settled everything.Even if u wil apologise later That could have bring down d anger in ur mum. U can even pretend to send her out that day and people around will start begging u. But now with d situaton now Your mum will think u are on ur wife side. I feel somehow when I read d part that says u met them fighting andbu were asking them what brought about d fight. It's an insult. No matter what happened ur wife and ur mum stand in front of u asking them why they beat each other ? Wonder shall never end. Let me ask u 3 questions 1. Suppose u beat her mother when she visit u what would have been ur wife and their family reaction 2. If u meet ur friend not ur wife in a fracas with ur mother will u stand there and be asking for d cause of d fight. 3. Ask your wife if she can beat her mother no matter d provocation. 1 Like 2 Shares |
Re: Pls Help!! My Wife Fought With My Mother Following A Quarrel. What Should I Do? by kushsy: 8:41am On Mar 28, 2015 |
Don't leave your wife..mother in laws can be funny at times..my mother was always treating my bothers wife badly for no reason..i did all I could to settle them but till now it's not working but at least she answer the girl greetings now..your mother came along with her supporters already but your wife did wrong for fighting your mother no matter what your mum did to her. She should not have fought back. Give your mother time and go see her with gift and her church members...you and wife should make it a prayer point and God will settle it..Thank God for my mother in law. |
Re: Pls Help!! My Wife Fought With My Mother Following A Quarrel. What Should I Do? by Xtfield(m): 8:42am On Mar 28, 2015 |
FOR THIS CAUSE SHALL A MAN LEAVE HIS FATHER AND MOTHER AND BE JOINED TO THE WIFE. Let your mother go. She is someone else's wife. 13 Likes |
Re: Pls Help!! My Wife Fought With My Mother Following A Quarrel. What Should I Do? by justwise(m): 8:42am On Mar 28, 2015 |
TheFilmmaker: If i'm married my mum has to respect the choice of who i'm married to, she got no right to come into my house, my wife's house to beat her or make demands. If she needs anything from me she should ask me and not forcefully demand it from my wife in my absent. I respect and love my mum but the moment she beats my wife that line has been crossed. I'm married to my wife and i will support her 100 percent. 15 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: Pls Help!! My Wife Fought With My Mother Following A Quarrel. What Should I Do? by Nobody: 8:42am On Mar 28, 2015 |
op's mother had the strength to throw the first hit and fight . she isn't as elderly as we might like to assume , in terms of age . the wife probably had her own scratches too. not fair to blame the wife alone, they were both in the wrong . the mother shouldn't have hit her first. considering they didn't get along before then , u don't expect the wife to stand there , not stand up for herself n be abused or bullied in her own home Dragonking: 1 Like |
Re: Pls Help!! My Wife Fought With My Mother Following A Quarrel. What Should I Do? by Nobody: 8:43am On Mar 28, 2015 |
atakamus: You shouldnt have married your wife. You should have married your mother since she is your first wife by inheritance. I never knew men who sleep with their mothers still exist. Do you guys make love and sleep on the same bed? I guess so. LISTEN TO YOURSELF!! SMH. 20 Likes |
Re: Pls Help!! My Wife Fought With My Mother Following A Quarrel. What Should I Do? by Thunder04(m): 8:44am On Mar 28, 2015 |
TheFilmmaker:On point,and for OP u cos dis for urself cos she dnt respect u nd ur family nd maybe u are too gentle, for lady's supportn ur wife y cnt she wait till u come back even if ur mum said she is talkn one of ur kids to be living with her u hv d finaly say not ur wife talkless of photo tnk God am not ur junior broda my respect for u will hv remain 10percent nd i will help u teach her great lesson if u cnt not dat she is ur wife but layn hands on my mum on nutral ground. 1 Like |
Re: Pls Help!! My Wife Fought With My Mother Following A Quarrel. What Should I Do? by MadCow1: 8:45am On Mar 28, 2015 |
emmatok: I am not a perfectionist like the OP, I am a realist. His wife has not left him so there is no point assuming the worst. And just so you know mothers do abuse their kids and even abandon them so let's stop painting mothers to be saints. Secondly every mother is a wife as well (assuming she was married) so technically they are both equal in status. Mother's should be forgiven I agree but that also means mothers are not above making mistakes. In this case, his mother was wrong on all counts and the mature thing would be for her to apologise to his wife for coming into her home to cause such chaos. You must understand that this is a matter of principle for me. My mother always advised me to never take sides with anyone Including her against my wife as that can cause bigger problems in my marriage than I can ever understand. Any man who can't place his wife above his immediate family does not understand the sacred institution of marriage and has no business being married. I would give you classic cases involving my own paternal grandma and my mum but this is not about me. But the one lesson I learnt from that case was that my Dad never sided with his mum and after the quarrel had stayed for so long, both women resolved their differences and became so close that my grandma would always go to my mum to get whatever she wanted from my dad. If a man allows his mother to rule over his wife inside her home, then he shouldn't be surprised when his wife acts like a single woman because that is not how a man covers his wife. 23 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: Pls Help!! My Wife Fought With My Mother Following A Quarrel. What Should I Do? by Raymie(m): 8:45am On Mar 28, 2015 |
My own take. Mother is irresponsible to have slapped wife. Wife is HIGHLY irresponsible to have set decorum aside and responded to mother in kind. Basically, the two have long standing deep seated resentment Issues, you even mentioned that. Otherwise such a trivial matter wouldn't have caused a fight. Now, since your wife is willing to make amends, assuming she has been made to realise the error of her ways, its up to you to work on your mother to accept wife's reconciliation moves. Now, how your mother regards you will come to play here. However, your mother's premise that your wife must leave MUST not stand. You must be FIRM on that. Grant that concession, and you have OPENED your home as a branch of your mother's kingdom. She will run your family for life, handing over to her siblings when she passes on. As someone here mentioned, your women love you so much to fight foe you. But you're the MAN of your house. That role comes with powers. Don't be afraid to wield them, in your home. whether your wife, your mother or any of your relatives are on the receiving end. Irresponsibility must not be tolerated, irrespective of who's involved. My opinion. 6 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: Pls Help!! My Wife Fought With My Mother Following A Quarrel. What Should I Do? by itsMrIke(m): 8:46am On Mar 28, 2015 |
perfectionist: 'I guess she chose not to listen'... You seem so lackadaisical about the whole thing. So you have warned your wife to avoid such situations, you know there is no love lost between them and you still thought it wise to leave them alone? I blame you. I blame your wife and I blame your mum a little. Slapping your mother was completely wrong on the part of your wife, unless she would tell me that she slaps her own mother in retaliation too. You didn't even mention if and how you have reprimanded your wife for what she did. You seem not concerned with how grave her actions were. You are even dissociating yourself from the abomination claim. You try well well. Continue letting your wife think she is Tatiana Ali, well done!! Oga, my suggestion is going to be harsh. You must 'handle' your wife. Get me right. Your mum will find it hard to forgive her, unless she knows/thinks you have punished your wife in some way. So my advice is that you ask your wife to go to her parents for a while, let her parents know what she did and have them beg on her behalf. She should remain there while you invite you mum to spend the weekend with you and the kid/s. Use the alone time to beg your mum. Invite ur in-laws to meet and beg her in your place. The you can invite your wife to come and reconcile with her there. Don't take your wife to you mother's house, I use God name take beg you!!! With what women do these days in anger!! I wish you good luck!!! 5 Likes |
Re: Pls Help!! My Wife Fought With My Mother Following A Quarrel. What Should I Do? by dBard: 8:46am On Mar 28, 2015 |
What a lot of people won't tell you about this situation is that there's no True solution. Put yourself in ur mother's position, your daughters husband physically exchanges blows with you for a 'simple' request, how will u feel?? Do you think the relationship will ever be restored ![]() Your wife had probably had it up to her head before reacting like that, but any attempt to blame her completely or paint her completely black will be resented and only breed animosity towards you, and she you'll have to live with for years to come.. and you, can u honestly say ur not harboring any resentment towards any of them for the issue. How also is your family going to look @ your wife from now on because it IS an abomination in most cultures. Not an easy situation to handle. My advice, your wife apologizes sincerely to your Mom according to tradition,if needs be, and then you both apologize and appease the family. Then if you can ,relocate to somewhere your both not so accessible, even if it's still in the same state/city and hope time heals all scars. . p.s...asking f advice from an 'Elder' knowledgeable in such tins might help. and next time be proactive and preempt situations All the best.. 1 Like |
Re: Pls Help!! My Wife Fought With My Mother Following A Quarrel. What Should I Do? by Abbott(m): 8:48am On Mar 28, 2015 |
Xtfield: |
Re: Pls Help!! My Wife Fought With My Mother Following A Quarrel. What Should I Do? by gabicon: 8:48am On Mar 28, 2015 |
perfectionist: You assumed wrongly bro you shouldn't have left them alone especially without male supervision. I'm afraid that the disaffection between your wife n mum is shipwrecking your home and the fact is that you are the problem. How u may ask, both women are trying to gain masterly control over you and either of them won't give way for the other. You as the man have to put both of them in their proper place, your wife can't be your mother and your mother can't be your wife they are two distinctively different roles, sit both of them down n talk to them and be firm while doing this. Don't play the blame game let both apologise for their rude behaviour your wife owns the pictures and has every right not to give it to your mum but she did lack the moral right to fight your mum while your mum disrespected you by slapping your wife thats assault. 2 Likes |
Re: Pls Help!! My Wife Fought With My Mother Following A Quarrel. What Should I Do? by MadCow1: 8:48am On Mar 28, 2015 |
Xtfield: Funny how most of the people siding with his mum have all forgotten this Biblical passage.. The sad truth is that wife's come before mothers both in the Bible and in the court of law. 12 Likes |
Re: Pls Help!! My Wife Fought With My Mother Following A Quarrel. What Should I Do? by kuulkyd(f): 8:49am On Mar 28, 2015 |
Oh dear! This is really messy, but it's happened already, let's look for the way forward. First, u shouldn't go there with ur wife. Get some elderly folks to go talk to ur mother, afterwards,u and ur wife can go with them to apologise. You need to talk to ur wife as well, she shouldn't allow such to ever occur again no matter the provocation, not just because it's rude, but it's a disrespect to u,I hope she has realised her faults anyway. Wish u luck my brother, and pls don't allow future occurrences pls since u know they are not in good terms. |
Re: Pls Help!! My Wife Fought With My Mother Following A Quarrel. What Should I Do? by TheFilmmaker: 8:51am On Mar 28, 2015 |
justwise: We probably have different family backgrounds and one of the moral tenets of my family (not married yet) is to shun hypocrisy. That it. We shun hypocrisy. I will never ever ever ever slap my mother. Nor another person's mother. I, therefore, will never condone such. I don't know about you. If she can slap your mother, then you can slap your mother too. Savvy? 2 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Pls Help!! My Wife Fought With My Mother Following A Quarrel. What Should I Do? by Abbott(m): 8:51am On Mar 28, 2015 |
MadCow1: Another wise post here. 5 Likes |
Re: Pls Help!! My Wife Fought With My Mother Following A Quarrel. What Should I Do? by Ashleyma77(m): 8:51am On Mar 28, 2015 |
I understand everyone will blame the wife for this.but I completely understand. even if u are my husbands mother,you can't come into my home and slap me.every human has a limit.a snap point.even if your wife is descent,she would have endured until it got to a point.I'll blame your mother.this fracas started when she OVERREACTED.whatever happened after is completely human.the only solution is you.you must talk to your mother.not as a son,but as a man.let your mother know you make the final decisions in your home and in her presence,MAKE A FINAL DECISION.you can bring others in if she remains adamant,but I believe your wife is sober so having her play her part in the reconciliation shouldn't be difficult. ...and most importantly, involve God.if God isn't part,it(reconciliation) will crumble.you can be rest assured of that 1 Like |
Re: Pls Help!! My Wife Fought With My Mother Following A Quarrel. What Should I Do? by iiichidodo: 8:51am On Mar 28, 2015 |
[b] Op,once you were an immature runt no gal will bother with...who stood by you...your mother.Once you was broke and down on your luck before you hammer come marry,who stood by? Your mother.We cannot replace the mothers in our lives but we can switch wives and women. You need to lay your priorities correct and act a man not a wuss.Send your wife away to appease your mother and also to send a strong message to your in laws that you cannot broke such nonsense from their ill bred daughter then reproach your mum for disrespecting your wife insisting that you ain't taking this lot from her anymore and threaten her with a bluff that she might not see them grandkids anymore if she doesn't take an active role in settling this impasse.Thus if ever your wife comes to her senses and apologises your mum should be good spirits for a reconciliation.The beauty is you don't have to turn a PI to settle this...just show the deuling parties what they stand to lose in this age old feminine quest for relevance....And they will settle their differences without you any wiser.[/b] |
Re: Pls Help!! My Wife Fought With My Mother Following A Quarrel. What Should I Do? by MadCow1: 8:51am On Mar 28, 2015 |
gabicon: I agree with all you said except that the wife had the moral right to protect herself.. If my mother comes into my house and fights my wife, she would leave my house that same day.. I am the head of my home and if my mother has a problem with my wife, she must bring it to me to handle not disrespect me by slapping my wife. Nobody has the right to assault my wife or kids.. 13 Likes |
Re: Pls Help!! My Wife Fought With My Mother Following A Quarrel. What Should I Do? by Thunder04(m): 8:52am On Mar 28, 2015 |
TheFilmmaker:Dnt mind mr. Home builder use ur mother nd ur family pride build home for ur wife, vegetable at work cos wen u hvnt ate d vegetable u cnt accept ur wife F5 ur mum but now u are d bradox,fool. |
Re: Pls Help!! My Wife Fought With My Mother Following A Quarrel. What Should I Do? by queenbetty1(f): 8:52am On Mar 28, 2015 |
Guy what you are saying is arrant nonsense can you allow your wife to abuse yur mother not to talk of slapping her or call her names if you can't advise pls don't distroy person home ![]() 1 Like |
Re: Pls Help!! My Wife Fought With My Mother Following A Quarrel. What Should I Do? by imbless: 8:53am On Mar 28, 2015 |
cococandy:my dear u are intelligent. 1 Like 1 Share |
Re: Pls Help!! My Wife Fought With My Mother Following A Quarrel. What Should I Do? by Vyolet(f): 8:54am On Mar 28, 2015 |
The wife is not to be blamed but the mother who started the fight by slapping the DIL,why on earth should you even raise your hands at an adult. Wifey also misbehaved and disrespected you she should have ran out of the house or locked herself in the room until you return,rather than engage in a fight like street fighter. Verdict: get wifey to beg mama,and let sleeping dog lie. I'm sure by now,mama would know her limits and she won't dare start any fight again. |
Re: Pls Help!! My Wife Fought With My Mother Following A Quarrel. What Should I Do? by TheFilmmaker: 8:54am On Mar 28, 2015 |
Thunder04: What vegetable? The truth is, there are good wives and bad wives. And by the way, I don't believe in witchcraft or spiritism. You can now wallow in your ignorance. |
Re: Pls Help!! My Wife Fought With My Mother Following A Quarrel. What Should I Do? by MadCow1: 8:54am On Mar 28, 2015 |
iiichidodo: Utter bollocks. . You dont know his story so stop with all these sentimental nonsense. Go fhuck your mum na so she can have your offspring's since she did all that stuff you wrote there. And though we can not replace mothers biologically, we can replace mothers in every other aspect. Those motherless babies in homes all have mothers. 8 Likes |
Re: Pls Help!! My Wife Fought With My Mother Following A Quarrel. What Should I Do? by doe: 8:54am On Mar 28, 2015 |
Tell your mum to behave or back off. She cannot just come into your family house and take things. In short your wife should throw you out for not bringing your mum to order. I am surprise your wife didn't give her a sound beating after the slap. Nonsense. Your mum has lived her life. She should let you live yours. 3 Likes |
Re: Pls Help!! My Wife Fought With My Mother Following A Quarrel. What Should I Do? by itsMrIke(m): 8:55am On Mar 28, 2015 |
aflyingbird: If your mum slaps you will you retaliate? If you answer is NO, then you have no business hitting your MIL. So, let us stop making excuses for the wife. Let us imagine if the husband has issues with the FIL, and the wife comes in and finds the husband beating the father. Am sure the brothers would have gone to beat up the man mercilessly, if not arrest him. |
(1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10) ... (28) (Reply)
Man Dumps Police Wife After Hot Sex With Single Mother / Man Kills His Daughter After Finding Out She Was Not His Biological Child (pic) / I Had A Child With My Brother's Ex Wife. Please Read And Advice Me
(Go Up)
Sections: politics (1) business autos (1) jobs (1) career education (1) romance computers phones travel sports fashion health religion celebs tv-movies music-radio literature webmasters programming techmarket Links: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10) Nairaland - Copyright © 2005 - 2024 Oluwaseun Osewa. All rights reserved. See How To Advertise. 118 |