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| Re: Gay And Depressed. by Oysdam(m): 7:18am On Mar 29, 2015 |
Depressedguy:
Hmmmmh, exactly what am planning. pls and pls..don't go about this with prostitutes You'll av yourself to blame.... |
| Re: Gay And Depressed. by Ura: 7:19am On Mar 29, 2015 |
It is good you spoke out bros. I don't believe that any one has a solution for you. This is just between you and your creator. A psychologist may try to help, but he will only like try to work on your state of mind gradually, but that does not mean he can solve the problem for you. I had no intention of commenting but after reading, I felt sad for you. It is not that I disagree with you that it is the same hell fire every one will go to since I have no evidence, but most of the time, we start paying for our sins even before we die. I often tell my friends that if the older generation will open up to us and tell us things they are passing true as a result of something they did wrong in their past, we the younger ones will be careful so that we can avoid some problems later in life. I have no intention of criticizing or condemning you, just that truth can be tough sometimes. Do you remember that the sin of Sodom and Gomorrah represent the only instance in the Bible that God used sulphur for burning in the physical? You may want to ask scientists around you the implication or effect of burning with sulphur. More than that He instructed that Lot and his family must keep running and not look back until they got to the mountains and when his wife looked back, she became a pillar of salt. I always ask myself that what did she see that is so bad that God never allowed her to testify about? Could it be that aside from the burning, He did something else to them? Nobody knows. What I am trying to bring to you attention is the enormity of the offence in question. I want you bear in mind that at any point that God draws your attention to something you are doing wrong, it means that He wants you to correct it immediately because judgement might not be far. The Bible tells us that Heaven does not rejoice in the death of a sinner. What I am trying to say is that at the point you are now, you should not rest until you find solution to the problem, and in your quest for a solution, you have to keep begging God for forgiveness because that is the number one step in finding a solution. Anytime God forgives you a sin, then it means that the problem you face at that time is solved. It is sin because the Almighty did not create you like that. In the story of creation, the Holy book tells us of the creation of animals that male and female he made them. Infact, man felt incomplete - unhappy, nothing in the garden made him happy until the Lord used Man's own rib to make him a companion. Don't forget that God could have created another man for him from the earth. What I mean to say is that you still have a missing rib.
Now, the main message is that God loves you more than anyone else associated with you. The devil must have seen some element of greatness in you for him to have bothered with you, and you must have given him some room for him to sow his loser ideas into you. Even when Jesus has answers for him, he kept returning with a new temptation until Jesus told him to get behind him. That is something you must remember to say when he comes with his nonsense thoughts. Everytime we hear of a celebrity or a wealthy man or talented man that joins some cult, he loses that element of greatness in him, and the devil will still announce it to the world that the person has lost out ( I don't mean that you are in cult o!). What I am trying to tell you is that you also have to be ready to take back what the devil has taken from you, and believe me, it will not be without a fight.
I feel that I have done my part. I know that if you discipline yourself and put your mind to it, you will see a solution. Feel free to look at the girls. That is why God made them so delicately and so beautifully. In fact, find one go where her father go dey pursue you, and enjoy the fun. Meanwhile, avoid homosexual friends and partners because where you have seen a light, they are still in darkness, and a solution you do not have, you cannot give them, by the way some of them may be there, secretly searching for a solution - let your new lifestyle serve as an example to them. And feel free to talk to sensible people because no one is without problems, and like they say, a problem shared is half slved. And don't forget to "pray without ceasing". Its not hard to do. 2 Likes |
| Re: Gay And Depressed. by Nobody: 7:23am On Mar 29, 2015 |
iono, but I feel for you. ithough I don't know how it feels like but I thk I can imagine it afterall almst every human ve been depressed from one tin or d oda. but, from ur post u ve neva been closed to d opposite sex letalone geting laid. maybe you should try that. somehow, I beliv it is spiritual and it is not. and dose asking u to praya bout it, am sure you have. talk to a psychologist too. dat will help a great deal! but guy,find one gal now and do it with her, lets start from dere and letz see how your body reacts to it. and don't fake it. don't deprive ursef of feeln what u supose to feel. forget d fact that you thk u are gay! thank God from your post, he. no go hard you to get gal. try dat! make nobody criticise me o  God help you |
| Re: Gay And Depressed. by grimandevil: 7:24am On Mar 29, 2015 |
Depressedguy:
Being gay is my life regret, i have questioned God and myself how i got to this stage. I just feel like commiting suicide.
Here is my story, my name is Frank, 26, a banker. I am the envy of most women, because am 6.2" tall, fair and very handsome. My nickname is Ramsey Noah, this is to tell you how good looking i am. But i have a very BIG problem, i am attracted to the same sex.
This is a problem i have come to notice at teen, i love girls company more than guys, i play all the girl plays and hate football, am guessing that could be where my formation was transposed. I ended up liking what girls like when am not one. But i have come to change a few things becuase i went to a boarding house and was always ridiculed for that. So i changed so many things there, the way i talk, the way i walk, and my gestures, also i love football now more than anything, but my sexuality has refused to change.
I have all it takes to get a woman, i have a good job, a car, and live alone. But at this age, i have not seen a womans pants not to talk of getting in between. But i have so many female friends, so many that the always take me for a player. Am jovial with them, buy them gifts and treat them well, but am not sexually attracted to any of them and have no feelings whatsoever. Am just a good guy, i know that, because that is the best i can do to cover up my little secret. And they(ladies) love me too and many are dying for my attention. I have been asked out so many times by ladies. One even offered to pay all the bills just for us to get intimate, but i declined, lying that i have a girlfriend i dont want to cheat on.
To make matters worse, i hate being gay, sometimes i go celibate for as long as six(6) months simply because i hate my life and my sexuality. Am always alone, indoors all through the weekend, because going out with guys will result to girl talk and i have nothing to contribute, me of all persons, so hard to believe. I also hate gay companies, so many regrets afterwards as to why i am this way. I envy straight guys to the core, i so much wish i am one. When i see a guy and a girl holding hands and taking a walk, i have this feeling of giult amd hatred for myself that i quickly get depressed.
Here is the problem, i want to marry early, at least before 28 or max 30. I need to connect to a woman and force myself into a relationship. I need to get attracted to a womans body, and get turned on by that. And finally, i need to learn how to tolerate a woman, and live with thier baggage. Am comfortable as a single man, i dont mind living alone till i die, i can cook well and am not a sex freak, i can live for years without it. But i want kids, i love them and cant wait to have a daughter. I have once told myself that once i get married and have kids, i will divoorce my wife and live alone then the kids can stay anywhere. But this idea is pure foolishness.
I am very religious, as a matter if fact, this conditionn is the only sin i battle with, i know we all have one. I hardly commit any other sin. But i know that just this one is very mortal, but we are all strugglling because we are all flesh. It takes the grace of God to overcome sin generally.(Please dont come and critisize, we are all going to the same hell: homosexual, hetrosexual; and no sin is worse than the other.)
This my condition is getting me more depressed by the day and sometimes i wish to end my life. But i like my life more than anything, so am thinking of patronising prostitutes at least to get feel of what it takes like. But am afriad of STIs.
Please help a brother... guy the truth is you are not a gay. you think you are. watch porn and service your self. :p |
| Re: Gay And Depressed. by grimandevil: 7:25am On Mar 29, 2015 |
grimandevil:
guy the truth is you are not a gay. you think you are. watch porn and service your self.  |
| Re: Gay And Depressed. by Praise5: 7:26am On Mar 29, 2015 |
You'll be in my prayers, may God help you. Go to Him with a broken and a contrite heart. |
| Re: Gay And Depressed. by PLEXPLEX(m): 7:27am On Mar 29, 2015 |
UR CASE IS A VERY EASY ONE. JUST GO FOR DELIVERANCE THAT IS ALL |
| Re: Gay And Depressed. by PAGAN9JA(m): 7:31am On Mar 29, 2015 |
[size=18pt]I see christian hypocrisy all over the thread.
when it comes to gayz, xtians dont mind promoting and enticing sexual relationships to "straighten" the individual. .[/size] 5 Likes |
| Re: Gay And Depressed. by Opengates(m): 7:32am On Mar 29, 2015 |
Depressedguy:
Being gay is my life regret, i have questioned God and myself how i got to this stage. I just feel like commiting suicide.
Here is my story, my name is Frank, 26, a banker. I am the envy of most women, because am 6.2" tall, fair and very handsome. My nickname is Ramsey Noah, this is to tell you how good looking i am. But i have a very BIG problem, i am attracted to the same sex.
This is a problem i have come to notice at teen, i love girls company more than guys, i play all the girl plays and hate football, am guessing that could be where my formation was transposed. I ended up liking what girls like when am not one. But i have come to change a few things becuase i went to a boarding house and was always ridiculed for that. So i changed so many things there, the way i talk, the way i walk, and my gestures, also i love football now more than anything, but my sexuality has refused to change.
I have all it takes to get a woman, i have a good job, a car, and live alone. But at this age, i have not seen a womans pants not to talk of getting in between. But i have so many female friends, so many that the always take me for a player. Am jovial with them, buy them gifts and treat them well, but am not sexually attracted to any of them and have no feelings whatsoever. Am just a good guy, i know that, because that is the best i can do to cover up my little secret. And they(ladies) love me too and many are dying for my attention. I have been asked out so many times by ladies. One even offered to pay all the bills just for us to get intimate, but i declined, lying that i have a girlfriend i dont want to cheat on.
To make matters worse, i hate being gay, sometimes i go celibate for as long as six(6) months simply because i hate my life and my sexuality. Am always alone, indoors all through the weekend, because going out with guys will result to girl talk and i have nothing to contribute, me of all persons, so hard to believe. I also hate gay companies, so many regrets afterwards as to why i am this way. I envy straight guys to the core, i so much wish i am one. When i see a guy and a girl holding hands and taking a walk, i have this feeling of giult amd hatred for myself that i quickly get depressed.
Here is the problem, i want to marry early, at least before 28 or max 30. I need to connect to a woman and force myself into a relationship. I need to get attracted to a womans body, and get turned on by that. And finally, i need to learn how to tolerate a woman, and live with thier baggage. Am comfortable as a single man, i dont mind living alone till i die, i can cook well and am not a sex freak, i can live for years without it. But i want kids, i love them and cant wait to have a daughter. I have once told myself that once i get married and have kids, i will divoorce my wife and live alone then the kids can stay anywhere. But this idea is pure foolishness.
I am very religious, as a matter if fact, this conditionn is the only sin i battle with, i know we all have one. I hardly commit any other sin. But i know that just this one is very mortal, but we are all strugglling because we are all flesh. It takes the grace of God to overcome sin generally.(Please dont come and critisize, we are all going to the same hell: homosexual, hetrosexual; and no sin is worse than the other.)
This my condition is getting me more depressed by the day and sometimes i wish to end my life. But i like my life more than anything, so am thinking of patronising prostitutes at least to get feel of what it takes like. But am afriad of STIs.
Please help a brother... I can see that you are presently inhabited by demons contacted during your escapades with others like you. The only candid advice I will give you is that you need overall deliverance and your life will become normal and all these problems would be over. TAKE THIS SERIOUS: Go and meet the man of God, Pastor TB Joshua for deliverance and your life will take a new turn. My 2cents### Shalom |
| Re: Gay And Depressed. by angrybird007: 7:36am On Mar 29, 2015 |
Depressedguy:
Being gay is my life regret, i have questioned God and myself how i got to this stage. I just feel like commiting suicide.
Here is my story, my name is Frank, 26, a banker. I am the envy of most women, because am 6.2" tall, fair and very handsome. My nickname is Ramsey Noah, this is to tell you how good looking i am. But i have a very BIG problem, i am attracted to the same sex.
This is a problem i have come to notice at teen, i love girls company more than guys, i play all the girl plays and hate football, am guessing that could be where my formation was transposed. I ended up liking what girls like when am not one. But i have come to change a few things becuase i went to a boarding house and was always ridiculed for that. So i changed so many things there, the way i talk, the way i walk, and my gestures, also i love football now more than anything, but my sexuality has refused to change.
I have all it takes to get a woman, i have a good job, a car, and live alone. But at this age, i have not seen a womans pants not to talk of getting in between. But i have so many female friends, so many that the always take me for a player. Am jovial with them, buy them gifts and treat them well, but am not sexually attracted to any of them and have no feelings whatsoever. Am just a good guy, i know that, because that is the best i can do to cover up my little secret. And they(ladies) love me too and many are dying for my attention. I have been asked out so many times by ladies. One even offered to pay all the bills just for us to get intimate, but i declined, lying that i have a girlfriend i dont want to cheat on.
To make matters worse, i hate being gay, sometimes i go celibate for as long as six(6) months simply because i hate my life and my sexuality. Am always alone, indoors all through the weekend, because going out with guys will result to girl talk and i have nothing to contribute, me of all persons, so hard to believe. I also hate gay companies, so many regrets afterwards as to why i am this way. I envy straight guys to the core, i so much wish i am one. When i see a guy and a girl holding hands and taking a walk, i have this feeling of giult amd hatred for myself that i quickly get depressed.
Here is the problem, i want to marry early, at least before 28 or max 30. I need to connect to a woman and force myself into a relationship. I need to get attracted to a womans body, and get turned on by that. And finally, i need to learn how to tolerate a woman, and live with thier baggage. Am comfortable as a single man, i dont mind living alone till i die, i can cook well and am not a sex freak, i can live for years without it. But i want kids, i love them and cant wait to have a daughter. I have once told myself that once i get married and have kids, i will divoorce my wife and live alone then the kids can stay anywhere. But this idea is pure foolishness.
I am very religious, as a matter if fact, this conditionn is the only sin i battle with, i know we all have one. I hardly commit any other sin. But i know that just this one is very mortal, but we are all strugglling because we are all flesh. It takes the grace of God to overcome sin generally.(Please dont come and critisize, we are all going to the same hell: homosexual, hetrosexual; and no sin is worse than the other.)
This my condition is getting me more depressed by the day and sometimes i wish to end my life. But i like my life more than anything, so am thinking of patronising prostitutes at least to get feel of what it takes like. But am afriad of STIs.
Please help a brother... I think you see gay as a sin because of religion. If u are gay I see no problem with that. It is when u start hating yourself that the problem comes up. It is who you are and you don't need to change it to please anybody If u don't love yourself;u can't love others. The first step is accepting u are NORMAL. They are many people like u out there. Cheer up |
| Re: Gay And Depressed. by yugo6ix(f): 7:39am On Mar 29, 2015 |
for the wages of sin is death and the gift of GOD is eternal life....for the fact that you feel guilty about your sexuality means that something must be wrong with it. The best thing you can do for yourself is to rid yourself of this feeling of guilt which is SIN and receive the fresh air of GRACE. Don't wait for later...pray to God now and be saved from eternal damnation |
| Re: Gay And Depressed. by charlsecy(m): 7:39am On Mar 29, 2015 |
Vyolet:
I do not believe anyone was born gay. How about intersex, those born with some combination of both male and sex female organs? If there were such people born, what made you think some people were not actually born gay on account of some genetic accident or something? |
| Re: Gay And Depressed. by LogoDWhiz(m): 7:41am On Mar 29, 2015 |
slimmy05:
why would he need to see a psychiatrist? Did u read my post at all? Well, lemme answer u. I advised him to see a psychiatrist so as to help him. |
| Re: Gay And Depressed. by spartanian(m): 7:41am On Mar 29, 2015 |
Have you heard of SCOAN? I believe you can get the change you desire there, just visit and pray for a spiritual encounter. |
| Re: Gay And Depressed. by bibiking7(m): 7:43am On Mar 29, 2015 |
1. Have you phucked a guy, if yes, then you are almost gay. You don't sound like you enjoy being gay. So I don't think that you are really gay.
2. I am begging you, do not listen to peeps telling you that you were born gay. Paedophiles are starting to use that as an excuse too. (I tend to classify gays, those that shag animals, paedophile as people with a wierd sexual orientation,in other words I group all of them together.) At some point while you were growing up, you missed something. Look for it.
3. Like an addiction, sexual orientations are hard to change, paedophile are usually placed under permanent watch and they must register as sex offenders when they relocate.
4. The spiritual aspect cannot be down played, talk to your religious leader. For those who care to know They should pray for you.
5. You sound bored, look for an exciting girl, one that will make you feel like you are hanging out with a guy, with time you will be sexual attracted to her.
6. Yep, look for a ho. A good one, they could do things to you that will make you wonder wonder and wonder. I have only ever came once during head (and I have received several) and it only took the girl 5 minutes. Go to Vegas in ikeja, what am I saying sef, any club these days, you go see correct olosho.
7. For extreme shituations, most people will kick against this, but you need extreme fun, to really loosen up, to go out, come back and testify to having a good A55 night. That is, chill with guys that are straight and know that you are gay but won't criticise or judge you (preferably, hommies that smoke weed and Bleep hos'). People that won't see you as sick. If you can enjoy their company. I can guarantee you that with time, your orientation will change. The only problem is that when you become straight, you might have become addicted to prostitutes (yep, addicted to hos.) |
| Re: Gay And Depressed. by hustla(m): 7:44am On Mar 29, 2015 |
DProDG:
Nigerians use prayers as the solution to everything... That's why they never get things solved.
OP, good you've acknowledged who you are now it's either you learn to embrace it or deal with depression. Good luck. You took the words out of my mouth
Inasmuch as prayer is good, Nigerians want to solve even the most logical problems with prayer, talk bout intellectual laziness. All he needs is some therapy, and a personal resolve to not be gay or to engage in acts like that.
He can visit a prostitute even, just saying |
| Re: Gay And Depressed. by Fourwinds: 7:48am On Mar 29, 2015 |
ronald4lif:
Well, brother I wish you the best and I hope you find solution to your problem. we don't want Anus scattering in Nigeria. have u seen two male horses scattering deir Anus.  until I see one ., I don't believe gayism is natural. |
| Re: Gay And Depressed. by Nobody: 7:52am On Mar 29, 2015 |
KevinBrown:
I didn't think I was gay. I was actually gay. And it lasted for like 3 years.
Its a long story tho
So how did it happen? You just woke up one morning and decided to be gay?...and three years later decided to switch back? How was this "being gay" of yours working out? Like was it just the sexual part that you found interesting or what? ? You do know that the MAIN reason that gay people may not be able to switch to just being straight has less to do with sex and more to do with the emotional attachment, as well as the fact that many actually have the emotional workings of a female, and therefore find it awkward, or somehow, to be attracted to same female they reason like. Kindly elucidate on how yours was. Thanks 3 Likes |
| Re: Gay And Depressed. by Nobody: 7:54am On Mar 29, 2015 |
OP I sha pity you. NL will drive you more into suicidal thoughts with their preachings. Goodluck with whatever you choose to do with yourself. I've seen way too many of your type  1 Like |
| Re: Gay And Depressed. by Nobody: 7:54am On Mar 29, 2015 |
Jesus saves bro..
And if my Bible says homosexuality is an abomination.. it means it's a no no..
Read the first book of Romans and experience some truth for yourself.. Confess Jesus and denounce that abominable spiritual seed in ur life..
As a man u need to experience life in full as a man. You can do it. You have to believe and confess with your mouth..
I don't want to know how you started but I tell u that this act is deeper than you know. And you will loose in life, body and soul.
Open your heart to receive the God news.. |
| Re: Gay And Depressed. by Fourwinds: 7:56am On Mar 29, 2015 |
grimandevil:
guy the truth is you are not a gay. you think you are. watch porn and service your self. :p hay.!! u are advicing him to move from frying pan to fire. y watching porn and self service. d same HOUSE of DEMONS |
| Re: Gay And Depressed. by McSterling(m): 7:56am On Mar 29, 2015 |
Depressedguy:
Being gay is my life regret, i have questioned God and myself how i got to this stage. I just feel like commiting suicide.
Here is my story, my name is Frank, 26, a banker. I am the envy of most women, because am 6.2" tall, fair and very handsome. My nickname is Ramsey Noah, this is to tell you how good looking i am. But i have a very BIG problem, i am attracted to the same sex.
This is a problem i have come to notice at teen, i love girls company more than guys, i play all the girl plays and hate football, am guessing that could be where my formation was transposed. I ended up liking what girls like when am not one. But i have come to change a few things becuase i went to a boarding house and was always ridiculed for that. So i changed so many things there, the way i talk, the way i walk, and my gestures, also i love football now more than anything, but my sexuality has refused to change.
I have all it takes to get a woman, i have a good job, a car, and live alone. But at this age, i have not seen a womans pants not to talk of getting in between. But i have so many female friends, so many that the always take me for a player. Am jovial with them, buy them gifts and treat them well, but am not sexually attracted to any of them and have no feelings whatsoever. Am just a good guy, i know that, because that is the best i can do to cover up my little secret. And they(ladies) love me too and many are dying for my attention. I have been asked out so many times by ladies. One even offered to pay all the bills just for us to get intimate, but i declined, lying that i have a girlfriend i dont want to cheat on.
To make matters worse, i hate being gay, sometimes i go celibate for as long as six(6) months simply because i hate my life and my sexuality. Am always alone, indoors all through the weekend, because going out with guys will result to girl talk and i have nothing to contribute, me of all persons, so hard to believe. I also hate gay companies, so many regrets afterwards as to why i am this way. I envy straight guys to the core, i so much wish i am one. When i see a guy and a girl holding hands and taking a walk, i have this feeling of giult amd hatred for myself that i quickly get depressed.
Here is the problem, i want to marry early, at least before 28 or max 30. I need to connect to a woman and force myself into a relationship. I need to get attracted to a womans body, and get turned on by that. And finally, i need to learn how to tolerate a woman, and live with thier baggage. Am comfortable as a single man, i dont mind living alone till i die, i can cook well and am not a sex freak, i can live for years without it. But i want kids, i love them and cant wait to have a daughter. I have once told myself that once i get married and have kids, i will divoorce my wife and live alone then the kids can stay anywhere. But this idea is pure foolishness.
I am very religious, as a matter if fact, this conditionn is the only sin i battle with, i know we all have one. I hardly commit any other sin. But i know that just this one is very mortal, but we are all strugglling because we are all flesh. It takes the grace of God to overcome sin generally.(Please dont come and critisize, we are all going to the same hell: homosexual, hetrosexual; and no sin is worse than the other.)
This my condition is getting me more depressed by the day and sometimes i wish to end my life. But i like my life more than anything, so am thinking of patronising prostitutes at least to get feel of what it takes like. But am afriad of STIs.
Please help a brother... I used to know a "transgender" guy by the same name as you, but your description is totally not him. That's by the way, anyway. Seeing this post, I just thought I should let you know you're perfectly fine and there's nothing wrong with you. Being gay is just another sexual orientation, and we do not choose our sexual orientation just the way we do not choose our ethnicity or race. Attempting to change one's sexuality is akin to attempting to change one's race- an effort in futility. Even if you think you succeeded, at the end, it'll all amount to self deception. Your sexuality is an intrinsic part of you. You can't change it. Even animals exhibit this apparently tangential sexual behaviour. My pets did. Truth is it isn't tangential. It is just one in the spectrum of sexuality. No sexuality is more normal than the other in this natural spectrum. Attachment of normalcy is wholly human. Reading your post, it's so clear to see why you feel depressed and really bad. You feel bad because of the way you think about yourself and state which consequently affects the way you feel. The way you think is heavily influenced by our society. A society of religious hypocrites and zealots who were gladdened by the recent criminalization of homosexuality. A people who think homosexuality is taboo when even some of their forebears tolerated homesexuals in ancient times. A people who due to lack of understanding and irrational fear, think that homosexuals are somehow the worst set of the human species and deserve the most inhuman punishments that even the politicians that have robbed us of our common wealth do not deserve. The social stigma is just incredible. It is this kind of thinking that has crystallized in you. You won't be feeling this way if you'd been raised in a society that encouraged you to accept yourself just the way you are. So, what do you do? Learn to change your thinking. There's this thing psychologists call Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT). It is very effective. Also, learn to accept yourself. There's also an acceptance therapy. I won't tell you it's going to be easy performing these exercises, especially while still living in a society that reminds you constantly that you're filth and a criminal for just being yourself. OP, if you have the means to leave Nigeria to a saner society, please do. It will help a lot. PS: Human beings are a really interesting phenomenon. They cry, moan and remonstrate when they're in the minority and are being oppressed by the majority. But they do not even pause to think before meting out the same inhumane treatment to others when the tables are turned. 1 Like |
| Re: Gay And Depressed. by nehimartins(m): 8:03am On Mar 29, 2015 |
@op...I feel ur pain bro...1st of all u need to make up ur mind that u want to change..2ndly pray about it then u need to see a psychologist ...that's wat u need ...then u have to try out sex with a female...u just need to...One doesn't know wat he's missing until u try it....having sex once or twice may just be ur turning point..I wish u d best in ur endeavours.. |
| Re: Gay And Depressed. by MizMyColi(f): 8:06am On Mar 29, 2015 |
wiegraf:
Like all things behavioral and what not, both nature and nurture have a role to play. It is the age-old debate. However, there are people who are so naturally gay that there's virtually nothing nurture can do about it. Nurture does and can play a part, yes. Sometimes significant, but nature is by far more the dominant factor for most personality factors. I was born black, I cannot be white unless, of course, I want to appear as unnatural as MJ did
Or consider a born, strong introvert. He can fake being an extrovert if it serves his purposes, say at work. However, that does not change the fact that he's an introvert. Indeed, if he does not find a way to satisfy his need to be alone, eg getting down time at his home, he will live a very stressful life, so much so he will likely not last long (think mental breakdowns, higher susceptibility to illnesses, suicide, etc).
Same with sexuality. Same thing op is displaying.
Note that the brains of introverts have been studied, and shown to be different to those of extroverts. Nature plays a dominant role. Same thing with sexuality; brains of homos and hets are different. In fact, the behavior of introverts as toddlers has been shown to be different to that of extroverts. Introverted children make a hell of a lot more noise and are more fidgety and excitable than those that are extroverted. Reason being introverts process/feel things more intensely than extroverts. Eg, as adults, these introvert and extrovert groups are given lime or something similar and their response is monitored; the intoverts release more saliva, their brains engage in more activities than the extroverts. They are more sensitive, and therefore tire more easily.
We all know people that have displayed clearly homosexual traits right from infancy, just as we know clearly introverted toddlers.
All that said this op is not serious. A gay xtian, if ever there was an oxymoron.....
I'll add that extroverts will not understand why an introvert would want to be alone, after all they find face to face communication and all that commotion vitalizing. They would now start to think there's something wrong with the introverts. Notice how their intentions were pure but ultimately, shortsighted? Again, same with sexuality.
Now, imagine the vast majority of the world was extroverted and their religious values dictated that introverts were sinful?
If you're an extrovert, imagine the reverse.
Very selfish religionists cannot get their heads out of their a$$es....
You sound intelligent, cool.
The emboldened doesn't make sense.
The fact that a person displays girlish/boyish traits doesn't make them gay, except of course....they choose to be by pursuing the life style.
It's all in the mind.
A very dire stronghold it is, the mind I mean.
Realities are created and debunked in the mind.
While I agree that there is bits of cognition in general human behavior, I submit that external influences matter a great deal.
There is nothing genetic about being gay.
It's a choice, and folks should stop giving a crass fvck what anyone thinks about their choice (as long as no one is put in apparent danger).
Your analogy, using the intro vs extro personality is somewhat faulty...especially in this context.
I'm ambiverted, with my introvert side always at the fore.
I'm not a top notch dresser, I would rather be alone than hang out with folks who discuss mostly shallow stuff.
In reality, except I have my A-game on, I'm perceived as timid (I laugh in Hispanic).
What's my point?
In all of this, I am cool with my self. I love me that way.
Does it mean I can't change, if I so direly want to?
The answer is before you.
This young man is not okay with his current state of being. Stop making him feel like he is stuck with it.
If he wants change, then change he'll get!
Question is, How badly, does he want it?
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| Re: Gay And Depressed. by Nobody: 8:18am On Mar 29, 2015 |
Watch porn with a female for hours... Make sure she's just on her undies... You know what I mean |
| Re: Gay And Depressed. by karllyG(m): 8:18am On Mar 29, 2015 |
Think dis guy is Heart broken which is tylpical of most gay pple. and the only way dey fight dat most times is wit regrets n depression.. to be sincere wit u guys take religion and sentiments away from dis cos its a very slim chance for a gay to become fully straight. the feelings n attraction to guys is an inbuilt tin.... |
| Re: Gay And Depressed. by freecocoa(f): 8:21am On Mar 29, 2015 |
MizMyColi:
You sound intelligent, cool.
The emboldened doesn't make sense.
The fact that a person displays girlish/boyish traits doesn't make them gay, except of course....they choose to be by pursuing the life style.
It's all in the mind.
A very dire stronghold it is, the mind I mean.
Realities are created and debunked in the mind.
While I agree that there is bits of cognition in general human behavior, I submit that external influences matter a great deal.
There is nothing genetic about being gay.
It's a choice, and folks should stop giving a crass fvck what anyone thinks about their choice (as long as no one is put in apparent danger).
Your analogy, using the intro vs extro personality is somewhat faulty...especially in this context.
I'm ambiverted, with my introvert side always at the fore.
I'm not a top notch dresser, I would rather be alone than hang out with folks who discuss mostly shallow stuff.
In reality, except I have my A-game on, I'm perceived as timid (I laugh in Hispanic).
What's my point?
In all of this, I am cool with my self. I love me that way.
Does it mean I can't change, if I so direly want to?
The answer is before you.
This young man is not okay with his current state of being. Stop making him feel like he is stuck with it.
If he wants change, then change he'll get!
Question is, How badly, does he want it?
From the story, what can you honestly say is the reason you think he wants change? |
| Re: Gay And Depressed. by karllyG(m): 8:33am On Mar 29, 2015 |
This is typical of most gays wen Heart broken they look for escape route tru regrets n depression... Lets remove sentiments and religion here its a very slim chance for a gay to become fully straight.the attractions and feelings to other guys is an inbuilt tin dat can neva be erased weda una like am or not |
| Re: Gay And Depressed. by Aida13: 8:36am On Mar 29, 2015 |
@ OP
I think you should be patient with life. Forget about your sexuality for now. Just focus on your job, life interests and family/friends if you have them. Trust me problems are never as bad as you think. The fact that you are troubled now doesn't mean you will be that way in 2,3 or even 5 year's time.
I know everyone needs love and romance. You must wish for intimacy and attraction from someone you admire. Since you can't have everything you want as of now, just get on with life.
As for hating your sexual preference, well there's nothing you can do since you knew your sexuality from an early age. Either you make a conscious physical effort to go straight, or accept yourself for who you are. And hope someone loves you the way you are. |
| Re: Gay And Depressed. by Nobody: 8:42am On Mar 29, 2015 |
MizMyColi:
It's all in the mind.
A very dire stronghold it is, the mind I mean.
Realities are created and debunked in the mind.
While I agree that there is bits of cognition in general human behavior, I submit that external influences matter a great deal.
There is nothing genetic about being gay.
It's a choice, and folks should stop giving a crass fvck what anyone thinks about their choice (as long as no one is put in apparent danger).
So sure with the above bolded? Are you a scientist? Have you read the various researches in determining sexual orientation? Do you know there are chromosomal, biological, physiological, cognitive, etc differences between gay and straight men? 3 Likes |
| Re: Gay And Depressed. by ManuelRichard(m): 8:50am On Mar 29, 2015 |
Depressedguy:
Being gay is my life regret, i have questioned God and myself how i got to this stage. I just feel like commiting suicide.
Here is my story, my name is Frank, 26, a banker. I am the envy of most women, because am 6.2" tall, fair and very handsome. My nickname is Ramsey Noah, this is to tell you how good looking i am. But i have a very BIG problem, i am attracted to the same sex.
This is a problem i have come to notice at teen, i love girls company more than guys, i play all the girl plays and hate football, am guessing that could be where my formation was transposed. I ended up liking what girls like when am not one. But i have come to change a few things becuase i went to a boarding house and was always ridiculed for that. So i changed so many things there, the way i talk, the way i walk, and my gestures, also i love football now more than anything, but my sexuality has refused to change.
I have all it takes to get a woman, i have a good job, a car, and live alone. But at this age, i have not seen a womans pants not to talk of getting in between. But i have so many female friends, so many that the always take me for a player. Am jovial with them, buy them gifts and treat them well, but am not sexually attracted to any of them and have no feelings whatsoever. Am just a good guy, i know that, because that is the best i can do to cover up my little secret. And they(ladies) love me too and many are dying for my attention. I have been asked out so many times by ladies. One even offered to pay all the bills just for us to get intimate, but i declined, lying that i have a girlfriend i dont want to cheat on.
To make matters worse, i hate being gay, sometimes i go celibate for as long as six(6) months simply because i hate my life and my sexuality. Am always alone, indoors all through the weekend, because going out with guys will result to girl talk and i have nothing to contribute, me of all persons, so hard to believe. I also hate gay companies, so many regrets afterwards as to why i am this way. I envy straight guys to the core, i so much wish i am one. When i see a guy and a girl holding hands and taking a walk, i have this feeling of giult amd hatred for myself that i quickly get depressed.
Here is the problem, i want to marry early, at least before 28 or max 30. I need to connect to a woman and force myself into a relationship. I need to get attracted to a womans body, and get turned on by that. And finally, i need to learn how to tolerate a woman, and live with thier baggage. Am comfortable as a single man, i dont mind living alone till i die, i can cook well and am not a sex freak, i can live for years without it. But i want kids, i love them and cant wait to have a daughter. I have once told myself that once i get married and have kids, i will divoorce my wife and live alone then the kids can stay anywhere. But this idea is pure foolishness.
I am very religious, as a matter if fact, this conditionn is the only sin i battle with, i know we all have one. I hardly commit any other sin. But i know that just this one is very mortal, but we are all strugglling because we are all flesh. It takes the grace of God to overcome sin generally.(Please dont come and critisize, we are all going to the same hell: homosexual, hetrosexual; and no sin is worse than the other.)
This my condition is getting me more depressed by the day and sometimes i wish to end my life. But i like my life more than anything, so am thinking of patronising prostitutes at least to get feel of what it takes like. But am afriad of STIs.
Please help a brother... @ OP: go with d first comment and save your preety life...change is d only constant thing......one thing with this gay thing is that nomatter how much society paints it,our hrt,mind n coconcience knows d truth....that its so dammed wrong n its one sin God hates |
