I came across this and thought of sharing here cause am certain a lot will need it.

Both married women and to be wives.


long time ago in Ijebu-Igbo, south-west Nigeria, a girl
named Jumoke got married and went to live with her
husband and mother-in-law. In a very short time, Jumoke
found that she couldn’t get along with her mother-in-law at
all. Their personalities were very different, and Jumoke was
angered by many of her mother-in-law’s habits. In
addition, she criticized Jumoke constantly.
Days passed, and weeks passed. Jumoke and her mother-in-
law never stopped arguing and fighting. But what made the
situation even worse was that, according to ancient Yoruba
tradition, Jumoke had to kneel to her mother-in-law and
obey her every wish. All the anger and unhappiness in the
house was causing Jumoke's poor husband great distress.
Finally, Jumoke could not stand her mother-in-law’s bad
temper and dictatorship any longer, and she decided to do
something about it! Jumoke went to see her father’s good
friend, 'Baba' who was a herbalist. She told him the situation
and asked if he would give her some poison so that she
could solve the problem once and for all.
Baba thought for a while, and finally said, "Jumoke, I will
help you solve your problem, but you must listen to me and
obey what I tell you."
Jumoke said, "Yes, Baba, I will do whatever you tell me to
do." Baba went into the back room, and returned in a few
minutes with a package of herbs. He told Jumoke, "You can’t
use a quick-acting poison to get rid of your mother-in-law,
because that would cause people to become suspicious.
Therefore, I have given you a number of herbs that will
slowly build up poison in her body. Every other day prepare
some delicious meal and put a little of these herbs in her
serving."
"Now, in order to make sure that nobody suspects you when
she dies, you must be very careful to act very friendly
towards her. Don’t argue with her, obey her every wish, and
treat her like a queen."
Jumoke was so happy. She thanked Baba and hurried home
to start her plot of murdering her mother-in-law. Weeks and
months went by, and every other day, Jumoke served the
specially treated food to her mother-in-law. She
remembered what Baba had said about avoiding suspicion,
so she controlled her temper, obeyed her mother-in-law,
and treated her like her own mother.
After six months had passed, the whole household had
changed. Jumoke had practiced controlling her temper so
much that she found that she almost never got mad or
upset. She hadn’t had an argument with her mother-in-law
in six months because she now seemed much kinder and
easier to get along with.
The mother-in-law’s attitude toward Jumoke changed, and
she began to love Jumoke like her own daughter. She kept
telling friends and relatives that Jumoke was the best
daughter-in-law one could ever find. Jumoke and her
mother-in-law were now treating each other like a real
mother and daughter. Jumoke’s husband was very happy to
see what was happening.
One day, Jumoke came to see Baba and asked for his help
again She said, "Baba, please help me to keep the poison
from killing my mother-in-law. She has changed into such a
nice woman, and I love her like my own mother. I do not
want her to die because of the poison I gave her."
Baba smiled and nodded his head. "Jumoke, there’s nothing
to worry about. I never gave you any poison. The herbs I
gave you were vitamins to improve her health. The only
poison was in your mind and your attitude toward her, but
that has been all washed away by the love which you gave to
her."
Have you realized that how you treat others is exactly how
they will treat you? There is a wise Yoruba saying: ‘The
person who loves others will also be loved in return.’ God
might be trying to work in another person’s life through you.
A candle loses nothing if it is used to light another one.
Meditation: Do not let your adornment be merely outward—
arranging the hair, wearing gold, or putting on fine
apparel— rather let it be the hidden person of the heart,
with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit,
which is very precious in the sight of God. - 1 Peter 3:3-4
We will succeed in Jesus name

Hehehe
Yimu over n over
Some MILs are very selfish
If only they cld ask their sons not to marry

Nice piece BTW
Patience is really rewarded

hmmmm,

tell those that were supporting the woman that fought her MIL in the last thread.


some pple go into marriage like its a battle, ready to attack their in laws at the slightest provocation.

This is good

My sister, I chose not to make any post for a while, but, 1, I can't see your thread and overlook it, and 2, the thread is too beautiful to be overlooked.


Honestly, I don't know why and how people have misunderstanding with their MILs. Honestly, anyone who could not love her MIL like her own mother do not have business getting married to the son of the said mother. Walahi!


But my sister, you'll need to grow a thick skin for this your thread o, because you're going to be attacked front, back and centre. That is NL for you. However, those who will take your message will also take it. As for me, that's my secret.............treating others the way I will like to be treated.
May God help us all.

greatgod2012:
My sister, I chose not to make any post for a while, but, 1, I can't see your thread and overlook it, and 2, the thread is too beautiful to be overlooked.


Honestly, I don't know why and how people have misunderstanding with their MILs. Honestly, anyone who could not love her MIL like her own mother do not have business getting married to the son of the said mother. Walahi!


But my sister, you'll need to grow a thick skin for this your thread o, because you're going to be attacked front, back and centre. That is NL for you. However, those who will take your message will also take it. As for me, that's my secret.............treating others the way I will like to be treated.
May God help us all.

I feel you jare my sisters. Lol.
Longest time ma, how are you and all yours.

Yes oo I know attack will come and trust me I no send. I don pass my message. Let the wise woman hear and heed to the voice of wisdom.

It just pains me so much when I read ob this forum the hatred some wives have for their mother inlaws and I just think aloud ** don't they have mothers or wunt they ever become mother inlaws in future **

It so damn annoying. There is nothing difficult in loving and treating our mother inlaws as we would treat our own mothers.

bebe2:
hmmmm,

tell those that were supporting the woman that fought her MIL in the last thread.


some pple go into marriage like its a battle, ready to attack their in laws at the slightest provocation.

Yes sis very true. I keep screaming it.

** if you cannot tolerate, love and care for your mother inlaw like your own mother then please do not marry the man **

They will become MILs in the future. Dem no know?

taryour:


Yes sis very true. I keep screaming it.

** if you cannot tolerate, love and care for your mother inlaw like your own mother then please do not marry the man **

simple!

Tolerant is the watch word.

was home a few weeks back, sat with my MIL and all of sudden she started advising me,

how i shud love my husband and always ''beg'' him when i offend him and he is angry.

i kept saying yes ma, yes ma, wen she finished i asked her, wat if he offends me?

she paused, look at me and said, '' my son is not a trouble maker he can never offend anyone''

i fell to the ground with laughter, cudnt control myself, it was my SIL that was telling her

so ur son is an angel abi?

wen i got home i started gisting my frd the story but she was so angry, saying NOOOOOOO i cant tolerate dat,

how can she say that to u? u shud have answered with this or that.

i just stood there shocked, i thot it will be gud laugh o, after her reaction i jeje carry my bag and went home.

Some ladies are crazy.

Madam some people will not treat you the way you treat them. It is you that have to enforce that respect. Like yorubas will say a father cannot have a son and not have boundaries

greatgod2012:
My sister, I chose not to make any post for a while, but, 1, I can't see your thread and overlook it, and 2, the thread is too beautiful to be overlooked.


Honestly, I don't know why and how people have misunderstanding with their MILs. Honestly, anyone who could not love her MIL like her own mother do not have business getting married to the son of the said mother. Walahi!


But my sister, you'll need to grow a thick skin for this your thread o, because you're going to be attacked front, back and centre. That is NL for you. However, those who will take your message will also take it. As for me, that's my secret.............treating others the way I will like to be treated.
May God help us all.

A refreshing n different message to the seeming mainstream view of intolerance and disrespect you see across these boards.

pickabeau1:
A refreshing n different message to the seeming mainstream view of intolerance and disrespect you see across these boards.

o ma'n so Oyinbo ke

SAMBARRY:
o ma'n so Oyinbo ke

Lol

pickabeau1:
A refreshing n different message to the seeming mainstream view of intolerance and disrespect you see across these boards.

the ones who are clamouring for intolerance & disrespect would soon get their comeuppance. what goes around comes around - all the DILs today would become MILs tomorrow & someone's daughter would disrespect them.

a woman slapped her MIL & some retärds were somehow justifying the action. if her mother was placed in the same scenario, would she have slapped her own mother? sometimes, you just have to assume some of the posts you read here are typed by animals.

coogar:


the ones who are clamouring for intolerance & disrespect would soon get their comeuppance. what goes around comes around - all the DILs today would become MILs tomorrow & someone's daughter would disrespect them.

a woman slapped her MIL & some retärds were somehow justifying the action. if her mother was placed in the same scenario, would she have slapped her own mother? sometimes, you just have to assume some of the posts you read here are typed by animals.

coogar........respect!
Take this.....

coogar:


the ones who are clamouring for intolerance & disrespect would soon get their comeuppance. what goes around comes around - all the DILs today would become MILs tomorrow & someone's daughter would disrespect them.

a woman slapped her MIL & some retärds were somehow justifying the action. if her mother was placed in the same scenario, would she have slapped her own mother? sometimes, you just have to assume some of the posts you read here are typed by animals.

coogar........respect!
Take this.........

coogar:


the ones who are clamouring for intolerance & disrespect would soon get their comeuppance. what goes around comes around - all the DILs today would become MILs tomorrow & someone's daughter would disrespect them.

a woman slapped her MIL & some retärds were somehow justifying the action. if her mother was placed in the same scenario, would she have slapped her own mother? sometimes, you just have to assume some of the posts you read here are typed by animals.

coogar........respect!
Take this.....

coogar:


the ones who are clamouring for intolerance & disrespect would soon get their comeuppance. what goes around comes around - all the DILs today would become MILs tomorrow & someone's daughter would disrespect them.

a woman slapped her MIL & some retärds were somehow justifying the action. if her mother was placed in the same scenario, would she have slapped her own mother? sometimes, you just have to assume some of the posts you read here are typed by animals.

coogar........respect!

All those akata women/divorcee can keep ranting on NL over MILs. I know one thing for sure, their plans of poisoning the minds of good women here on NL and outside NL would never work. Their plans of making single ladies to have an inbuilt hatred on MILs they haven't even met will fail woefully. Just because your own marriage has failed or is failing due to your intolerant, wicked, self-centered and malicious nature does not mean others must fail or join you in your sinking ship. You haters of MILs and in laws, God is watching you cuz someday, you will be an in law.

coogar:


the ones who are clamouring for intolerance & disrespect would soon get their comeuppance. what goes around comes around - all the DILs today would become MILs tomorrow & someone's daughter would disrespect them.

a woman slapped her MIL & some retärds were somehow justifying the action. if her mother was placed in the same scenario, would she have slapped her own mother? sometimes, you just have to assume some of the posts you read here are typed by animals.

As in...

So many angry vengeful femmes

bennyrazz:
All those akata women/divorcee can keep ranting on NL over MILs. I know one thing for sure, their plans of poisoning the minds of good women here on NL and outside NL would never work. Their plans of making single ladies to have an inbuilt hatred on MILs they haven't even met will fail woefully. Just because your own marriage has failed or is failing due to your intolerant, wicked, self-centered and malicious nature does not mean others must fail or join you in your sinking ship. You haters of MILs and in laws, God is watching you cuz someday, you will be an in law.

You know what? Anybody that wants to take advice on this forum need to first ask for the spirit of discernment seriously before taking it. Sometimes when I see some advice on this platform, I feel like weeping for whoever that will out of ignorance take to such advice. Many of these advisers are so aggressive to the extent that you see their posts filled with screaming.
May God give us the wisdom to know which advice/counsel to heed to and the ones to discard. Amen

coogar:


the ones who are clamouring for intolerance & disrespect would soon get their comeuppance. what goes around comes around - all the DILs today would become MILs tomorrow & someone's daughter would disrespect them.

a woman slapped her MIL & some retärds were somehow justifying the action. if her mother was placed in the same scenario, would she have slapped her own mother? sometimes, you just have to assume some of the posts you read here are typed by animals.

Thanks o mr coogar. Its so so annoying. After I read that thread I got so angry I felt I could see that husband ant talk some real sense into his head. What an animal she has as a wife, that woman is a disgrace to humanity. How dare she raise her hands to slap her mother inlaw If her hubby files for a divorce sef,she deserves every bit of it.


Even if she apologizes and reconciles with her mother inlaw thing can never go down well with them. That the height of disrespect.

Am most certain that how she slaps and beats her mother up so am not surprised.

A yoruba saying that ** ise ile lo n gbe ni de ita **

greatgod2012:




You know what? Anybody that wants to take advice on this forum need to first ask for the spirit of discernment seriously before taking it. Sometimes when I see some advice on this platform, I feel like weeping for whoever that will out of ignorance take to such advice. Many of these advisers are so aggressive to the extent that you see their posts filled with screaming.
May God give us the wisdom to know which advice/counsel to heed to and the ones to discard. Amen

Sometimes when i read some posts,i ask myself if marriage has changed that much or maybe i live in a different world. It is only on NL i read that marriage is like a battlefield,waiting for someone to make the first move then shoot to KILL.

Patience and tolerance has become enemies in marriage these days, and that begs some questions:why are you married?why did you choose this kind of person as your partner?Why go into a marriage knowing the MIL does not like you?

greatgod2012:

coogar........respect!
Take this...........

honestly, you just have to think some of the comments are trolling attempts.

pickabeau1:

As in...
So many angry vengeful femmes

very bitter!

taryour:

Thanks o mr coogar. Its so so annoying. After I read that thread I got so angry I felt I could see that husband ant talk some real sense into his head. What an animal she has as a wife, that woman is a disgrace to humanity. How dare she raise her hands to slap her mother inlaw If her hubby files for a divorce sef,she deserves every bit of it.

the funny thing is what led to the brawl is such a simple issue. if a wife could slap someone's mother for that then i fear for today's men.

greatgod2012:




You know what? Anybody that wants to take advice on this forum need to first ask for the spirit of discernment seriously before taking it. Sometimes when I see some advice on this platform, I feel like weeping for whoever that will out of ignorance take to such advice. Many of these advisers are so aggressive to the extent that you see their posts filled with screaming.
May God give us the wisdom to know which advice/counsel to heed to and the ones to discard. Amen

Amen o. you are not far from the truth. Some advice are born out of resentment, anger and frustration. Just like you said, anyone seeking for advice here have to pray to God for a discerning spirit else what was bad before would go worse sporadically once they follow their advice.


I don't do name/moniker calling but I want to use this opportunity to appeal to the conscience of these people to stop leading posters seeking for advice astray. What is your gain? or you derive happiness in the cry of others?

The write-up is quite nice and educative. I never had any form of confrontation with my MIL, am not a saint neither is she but i try as much as possible to control my nerves any time i get offended by her.

There are times when she really push me but i just remind myself that my mum can do worse things to me. I think the major problem in our society is that we tend to take advice from people who have no business giving it, and we have equally grown to being impatient.

Least i forget, my MIL was present when i gave birth to my 2 children (in fact, she was in the labour room with me when i delivered my second baby). People in the hospital even though she is mother.

This is refreshing.

When wisdom speaks, it does so calmly and clearly ...one only needs to agree.

coogar:


the ones who are clamouring for intolerance & disrespect would soon get their comeuppance. what goes around comes around - all the DILs today would become MILs tomorrow & someone's daughter would disrespect them.

a woman slapped her MIL & some retärds were somehow justifying the action. if her mother was placed in the same scenario, would she have slapped her own mother? sometimes, you just have to assume some of the posts you read here are typed by animals.

Lol @animals

Let's cut them some slack, they were only projecting what they must have done to their own MILs and thus want every other upstanding woman to join them in towing that line, so they can be seen as the classy group of tough women who dealt with their MILs and came out victorious.

Like that's something to be proud of...

coogar:


honestly, you just have to think some of the comments are trolling attempts.



very bitter!



the funny thing is what led to the brawl is such a simple issue. if a wife could slap someone's mother for that then i fear for today's men.

I tell you bro. I had to go back to read the op first post over and over again. Up to 5 times and I read the same thing. I needed to be sure it wasn't the headache I was having after long hours of driving that was making my eyes blur. Its so ridiculous that just a mare pix caused all these.

I wonder what she would have done if the mother inlaw had made an attempt to take her OWN GRANDCHILD for a day or 2 days holliday with her, she would have probably set the woman ablaze.

And if it was her own mother or even a friend that wanted the picture,she would give it out with no delays or given out the whole album sef.

bennyrazz:


Amen o. you are not far from the truth. Some advice are born out of resentment, anger and frustration. Just like you said, anyone seeking for advice here have to pray to God for a discerning spirit else what was bad before would go worse sporadically once they follow their advice.


I don't do name/moniker calling but I want to use this opportunity to appeal to the conscience of these people to stop leading posters seeking for advice astray. What is your gain? or you derive happiness in the cry of others?

Lol. If I hear. Na today? They all claim they have longer years of experience and have seen and passed tru it all. And funny enough they would never ever try such with their own mother inlaws.

taryour:



Lol. If I hear. Na today? They all claim they have longer years of experience and have seen and passed tru it all. And funny enough they would never ever try such with their own mother inlaws.

I think u r wrong

They have tried it and have gotten away with it and have estranged mothers in law hence its their gospel truth that they preach online.

pickabeau1:


I think u r wrong

They have tried it and have gotten away with it and have estranged mothers in law hence its their gospel truth that they preach online.

Na wa o. A lot of women should be feard oo. I just wonder what their children will grow up to believing.

Most times when I read such post, am tempted to believe the stories are false or mare exaggerations.

taryour:


Na wa o. A lot of women should be feard oo. I just wonder what their children will grow up to believing.

Most times when I read such post, am tempted to believe the stories are false or mare exaggerations.

Some are no doubt exaggerated

But believe you me the consistent message of controlling men and estrangement of MIL is there to see

Me and my husband alone

taryour:



Lol. If I hear. Na today? They all claim they have longer years of experience and have seen and passed tru it all. And funny enough they would never ever try such with their own mother inlaws.

Err, one has said she threw her MIL out before calling her husband to inform him... and then wanted an Oscar for the performance

crackhaus:

Err, one has said she threw her MIL out before calling her husband to inform him... and then wanted an Oscar for the performance

Oh yes I remember correctly and I had to quote that post and asked the poster where her daughter was when she did that.