Mathematical:





Realty? Seriously that's sweet.if ya claim story suffice close to truth.almost every girl dream to have a caring and responsible guy as you're.. but here's the question mark? How sure are yu that she loves you?.. believe me we ladies can fake love for years if the cake got lots of icing 1st you're getting irresponsible by attaching ya finance much on her than giving her way to cut down her expenses . ain't giving any advice, just weighing out option.. find a way to get yasef back, having seperate apartment ,then save for the dry days

martyns303:
I wanted to open a topic to discuss similar issue but since there is one already, I would like to talk about it here.

OP please don't be angry, let me use this opportunity.

Am in this situation right now. My GF of 4yrs is in her final year, she stays off campus and pays N150,000 annually. I paid for the place and help set it up as in furnitures to electronics, she practically have everything.

I also have my own place, a self contain, very big and spacious, am also paying N150,000 annually, I am a graduate, I don't have a job yet but I make do on the side, am currently on a course and I know once am done a job is not far fetched.

The problem now is my rents had expired, mine expires 3 months before hers, instead of digging out N300,000 to pay for both of us, one of us had to move in with the other as we have other things that will require expenses. She can't move in with me because my place is far from her school and will require around N500 everyday for transport, so I decided to move in with her. It wasn't an easy move, beside overcoming the social thoughts from people like the OP, we also incured a lot of bills doing the actual moving, as she had to move her stuffs to her family home, while I moved my stuffs into her place.

We both know it is inappropriate to be living together when we are not married, but we just had to make do. This is her second semester in final and I am most likely to leave the country in 3 months too.

Now here is where I need advice from matured NLs, by matured I mean people who actually take responsibility for themselves and maybe others. I am in my late 20's and I intend marrying this beautiful woman of mine, but a few things have changed on our financial expenses since I moved in. Prior me moving in, I give her around N7,000 per week, I know the next question will be what of her parents, she was raised by a single parent (mom) dad is late and the mom really tried. Now I am spending close to N3500 per day, I asked her how we can cut down on expenses, and we came up with a plan, we bought all the food items we need, filled the gas and every corner where money may go in, then I gave her N30,000 as our feeding for the month, but am still making expenses that are fast draining my pocket.

She is very disciplined, I think we just both don't know how to manage ourselves yet, I would really appreciate advice from married and single NLs who have been in my shoes to please help me with advice, because I believe we may soon be having financial issues, and once there are financial issues in a relationship other things may follow.

martyns303:


Thanks for your comment, I have no doubt about her love for me, and even if there where I have no regrets. She had been there for me during my uni days since I got in before her and she had really helped me build 2 successful career. So am not being stupid, I owe her a lot.

About the moving, am moving out in 2-3 months, we just need to find a way to really cut down on expenses

aflyingbird:
they hv no value ? by the way u shouldn't be talking . for someone who had her first child out of wedlock and terminated her second whom she called an "unplanned assignment ", u shouldn't be talking

shadowgwalker:
quietBITCH! you don't have to talk when I speak!you get that?clumsy 4kface.

zeb04:
you are right but why are you angry about it!

Did all the Emeke/musa/kunle chop your sister for free without paying a dime on her head?

classicB:
That's nonsense of the highest order. You leave your parents house to school only to go and start actin like a wife to a guy your parents don't know, you eventually get pregnant and start aborting your babies for someone not mentally ready for anything in life
After the guy must have used you left right and center, he dumps your sorry ass after school then you will come and start shouting guys are bad? No! It's you that is foolish

shadowgwalker:
quietBITCH! you don't have to talk when I speak!you get that?clumsy 4kface.

sevantex:
Another veri pained OP ventin his "no-babe" furstrations on women...,If u don't wanna pay bride price, kip lookin for babes dt wuld marry u for free or U leave ppl"s problems alone nd focus on enjoyin ur life.

Moana:
I have never cohabitted because i love my personal space but honestly i dont know cohabiting gives people like the OP sleepless nights firstly its her body, if she wants free regular sex its really her vagina getting it...not yours, your mother's or your sister's.

Everybody has the freedom to live their life in anyway they deem fit, provided that she doesnt harm anyone else in the process

Rapmoney:
...and I didn't stop anyone from cohabiting. I only expressed my opinion! This is democracy and there's freedom of speech!!! Whoever that is not comfortable with it should drown himself/herself!!!

Moana:
this is all our african men have to provide to society... Not even ideas to eliminate porverty or decreasing the unemployment rate in our countries.

Rapmoney:
...and so? When has it become the sole duty of a man to eradicate poverty? Can't you as a woman think of ways to eradicate poverty? !!! Except you want to tell me that women's brains work below capacity

Moana:
i never said its solely a man's duty, but as people who like to call themselves "the heads" you are doing a pretty lousy job at it. This thread, a perfect example

Rapmoney:
Who cares? I don't give a fvck about ur opinion!!!

Viogu:
it would be nice to see you giveaway your sisters for free

Rapmoney:
I often wonder where Nigerian youths copied this nonsense from because even students in universities in America, Asia and Europe do not engage in this trashy act as we do over here!!! Yet, we still call them agents of immorality?

I just feel, deep within my heart, that girls who cohabit or cohabited in the university do not desrve any dime as bride price paid on them! They should just follow their would-be husband to his house, free of charge and continue where they stopped in school!

!

Rapmoney:
I often wonder where Nigerian youths copied this nonsense from because even students in universities in America, Asia and Europe do not engage in this trashy act as we do over here!!! Yet, we still call them agents of immorality?

I just feel, deep within my heart, that girls who cohabit or cohabited in the university do not desrve any dime as bride price paid on them! They should just follow their would-be husband to his house, free of charge and continue where they stopped in school!

!

takoi:


What right do you have to judge anybody? What's your business with any woman's bride price. My good guess is that you are gay and you will never ever have to pay anybody's bride price.

aflyingbird:
you're a good man! this's why i don't like when pple looking down on those cohabiting. how can anyone conclude someone like your gf has no value? it's just the situation you've found yourselves in. that said, you're really trying !!! you're not even her husband yet and you're paying for her housing, rent, transportation, giving her money to spend, chaii. have you been doing all these for the 4 yrs you've been together?? . you didn't even hv to move in with her. you could've found a way to pay your own rent alone but you moved in to actually help her .

since you've cut back on your expenses and still short on money, the only other solution is to generate more income. money won't suddenly appear out of nowhere. idk if she has ever worked, since you've been giving her money, i doubt it. she should look for a part-time job now to help out. unless you want to get a second job, up to you.

Rapmoney:
Yeah, I have shifted...and from such disgraceful women!

aflyingbird:
I don't agree with cohabitation of any sort and have never done it nor will I ever do it. But to say a person loses their value because of it, really? If that's the extent if your education then I pity you. Some idi000ts here, even the females, are agreeing with the op. Too much ignorance and mediocre education is ruining Nigeria!

Rapmoney:
U call them idio.ts because they didn't buy ur opinion? I pity u!

ireneidiva:

The guys are not 'disgraceful' guys?

classicB:
That's nonsense of the highest order. You leave your parents house to school only to go and start actin like a wife to a guy your parents don't know, you eventually get pregnant and start aborting your babies for someone not mentally ready for anything in life
After the guy must have used you left right and center, he dumps your sorry ass after school then you will come and start shouting guys are bad? No! It's you that is foolish