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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / Alarming Number Of Unmarried Ladies (28 - 39 Yrs) (88804 Views)
Any Married Lady Who Never Had This Is As Good As unmarried. / The Stigmatisation Of Unmarried/single Working Adult Nigerians / Alarming Number Of Nigerian Women Think Spousal Abuse by husband is justifiable (2) (3) (4)
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Re: Alarming Number Of Unmarried Ladies (28 - 39 Yrs) by coogar: 7:05pm On Apr 23, 2015 |
raumdeuter: that's standard, abeg! at 19-21, every girl sets a high standard because she's still in her prime then. the higher the demand, the more value the commodity would hold. as she grows older, the commodity generally drops in value. by the age of 30, 90% of the criteria would have been removed....at this point, it doesn't matter if the suitor smokes or drinks......as long as he's ready to marry. ![]() however, the girls in the article managed to take the second/third choice suitors home only for the parents to disapprove. some of them continued to take the suitors home after graduation/working(late 20s/early 30s). there's an element of truth in their comments. 7 Likes |
Re: Alarming Number Of Unmarried Ladies (28 - 39 Yrs) by freecocoa(f): 7:05pm On Apr 23, 2015 |
coogar:Smh. Whether they desire marriage or not is not the issue here. Nigerian women get married every day. 5 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Alarming Number Of Unmarried Ladies (28 - 39 Yrs) by coogar: 7:12pm On Apr 23, 2015 |
innervoice: i strongly disagree.... if the sons are irresponsible, there's nothing to say the daughters wouldn't be far worse than the sons? how did the parents manage to train their daughters but then neglected the sons? highly unlikely. this is like a female midget demanding a tall suitor. it is no longer her rights to demand such. she should just accept whatever life throws at her......she should never set any standard, that would be tantamount to hypocrisy.
how's the problem with men? it's the women that should lower their standards to a reasonable range. where do you expect a 25-30 year old nigerian guy to find money to buy a car, get a house, and then fund a multi-million naira wedding? the boy just probably graduated from a uni. he's just starting his life & some greedy parents are demanding things their own older sons have not achieved. hypergamy is fairly universal but nigerians take theirs to an astronomical level. freecocoa: this is neither here nor there. the population is 160 million. at least 20 million women are single & eligible. if 10,000 women marry in every state per month, that's just 370,000 per month or 4 million per year. that's just 20% ![]() 15 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Alarming Number Of Unmarried Ladies (28 - 39 Yrs) by innervoice(m): 7:20pm On Apr 23, 2015 |
coogar: As a matter of fact, there are plenty of families in which some kids are very responsible and others not. I am yet to see a family without at least one black sheep. If, however, you believe that their daughters are irresponsible too, then mention their shortcomings and leave out their brothers. this is like a female midget demanding a tall suitor. it is no longer her rights to demand such. she should just accept whatever life throws at her......she should never set any standard, that would be tantamount to hypocrisy. A woman does not need to be tall. I know plenty of tall men who have short girlfriends. Height is a male issue, not a female. how's the problem with men? Haven't you just said eligible men are only to be found one in a million? You have answered your question yourself. I didn't know eligible equals very rich. the boy just probably graduated from a uni. he's just starting his life & some greedy parents are demanding things their own older sons have not achieved. hypergamy is fairly universal but nigerians take theirs to an astronomical level. First it was about his profession and now it's about his bank account. What are we talking about now? 3 Likes |
Re: Alarming Number Of Unmarried Ladies (28 - 39 Yrs) by Jman06(m): 7:22pm On Apr 23, 2015 |
cococandy:@coco, more young girls are born every day! An older guy will find it easy to pick a young girl from the ' new breeds' than an older lady. My advice to such ladies is to keep improving themselves both career wise and also their looks. Provided they were never runs girls who only follow men about to meet their immediate needs without thinking about the future, such ladies will most likely find a man, even at 45 if they desire to be married. How are you doing coco? Hope you good? 3 Likes |
Re: Alarming Number Of Unmarried Ladies (28 - 39 Yrs) by coogar: 7:29pm On Apr 23, 2015 |
innervoice: i said these parents have sons who are irresponsible. sons wouldn't qualify as one black sheep. pay attention to the details...
so a midget can demand to marry a tall man? do you know the meaning of a midget or are you just trolling?
according to the standards set by nigerian parents. eligibility wouldn't be such an issue if the standard applied by nigerian parents is the same as in other climes. in my neck of the woods, teenagers get married. it's not about what the dude has or doesn't have. as long as they love each other, both families are ready to proceed with the marriage rites.
is profession not tied to bank account in nigeria or what are you trying to say? 5 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Alarming Number Of Unmarried Ladies (28 - 39 Yrs) by Stillfire: 7:41pm On Apr 23, 2015 |
There are more men than women in Nigeria. There would be more men in Nigeria not married than women unless you want to claim some dodgy statistics now. I guess focusing on women is more catchy when we talk about marriage ![]() Suitors will always come, so Nigerian women in Nigeria have a large pool of numbers to choose from. So it makes sense that it's their parents spoiling things for them and not because there's scarcity of men. I always say it here that Nigerian parents will baby you till you or them die, especially as a female. Some people wanted to crucify one time because I advised one girl that she needs to start challenging her parents decisions when it comes to her life. ![]() Nigerian women you need to stand up to your parents. I have already re-trained my parents ages ago. ![]() 9 Likes |
Re: Alarming Number Of Unmarried Ladies (28 - 39 Yrs) by MRBrownJ: 7:45pm On Apr 23, 2015 |
innervoice: bwaaaaah, bro let me help.... slowly. so the topic today is for us to look as to why so many +35 women are still single. i then suggested that it could be because of the following reasonS (focus on the S which means plural). it could be because: A) these women have been preconditioned to believe that they need a man in order to be valued (and that their parents have the last say on who he should be). or B) if you follow the stand i just mentioned above then you have to accept your fate if you end up a +35 single woman (or blame your parents) or C) if you got to +35 and NO MEN has been interested in marrying you then possibly the problem is within YOU or D) last i pointed out that at +35 there is too much competition, and INDEED these ladies can be referred as old cargo so again, this is 4 different plausible reasons as to why a Nigerian woman could still be single at +35 7 Likes |
Re: Alarming Number Of Unmarried Ladies (28 - 39 Yrs) by coogar: 7:47pm On Apr 23, 2015 |
Stillfire: the difference is nigerian males are breaking ranks and marrying across the racial lines. even when they cannot find foreign young women, caucasian grannies fly across the atlantic ocean to marry them. there are more unmarried eligible single women in nigeria than their male counterparts. just attend any of the pentecostal churches in lagos......and see for yourself. 3 Likes |
Re: Alarming Number Of Unmarried Ladies (28 - 39 Yrs) by MRBrownJ: 7:48pm On Apr 23, 2015 |
GetFeatured: bro, bring your survey to NL and i will gladly answer it, but i wont click on any unknown link like the one above, sorry. |
Re: Alarming Number Of Unmarried Ladies (28 - 39 Yrs) by saaedlee: 7:49pm On Apr 23, 2015 |
Cc Lalasticlala |
Re: Alarming Number Of Unmarried Ladies (28 - 39 Yrs) by coogar: 7:52pm On Apr 23, 2015 |
Stillfire: nigerian parents feel entitled and you cannot really blame them. i mean......what do you expect? they train the kids, house them, feed them, clothe them. an unmarried nigerian woman is highly likely to be staying with her parents.....why won't the parents feel like demi-gods? 3 Likes |
Re: Alarming Number Of Unmarried Ladies (28 - 39 Yrs) by Stillfire: 7:53pm On Apr 23, 2015 |
coogar: Lol. You are right about one thing. Nigerian girls are not trained to have social skills but trained to be homely, docile and studious. I was watching African top model on youtube, you would just know the naija girls lacked social skills. ![]() |
Re: Alarming Number Of Unmarried Ladies (28 - 39 Yrs) by kaboninc(m): 7:53pm On Apr 23, 2015 |
cococandy: |
Re: Alarming Number Of Unmarried Ladies (28 - 39 Yrs) by innervoice(m): 7:56pm On Apr 23, 2015 |
MRBrownJ: There are hundreds of reasons why a lady could be unmarried at 35+ but you chose to mention those. Interesting. 1 Like |
Re: Alarming Number Of Unmarried Ladies (28 - 39 Yrs) by kaboninc(m): 7:56pm On Apr 23, 2015 |
coogar: But these parents married at a very early age. |
Re: Alarming Number Of Unmarried Ladies (28 - 39 Yrs) by innervoice(m): 7:57pm On Apr 23, 2015 |
coogar: You have said it all. Millions of men are not husband material so the problem is with them and not with Nigerian parents who want the best for their daughters. Thanks. 4 Likes |
Re: Alarming Number Of Unmarried Ladies (28 - 39 Yrs) by coogar: 7:58pm On Apr 23, 2015 |
Stillfire: many of them don't even know how to reply when you say hi to them. some just smile & cover their blushing face or make faces like a buffalo just farted in their nostrils. ![]() nigerian men are better-trained as far as social skills are concerned. they tend to go out more at their early stage of development while the female counterpart is still learning how to make every type of soup in the kitchen. ![]() innervoice: by whose standard? are the same men not marrying easily outside nigeria? abeg, nigerian parents are the problem. even when the girl manages to bring a classy suitor home, they would still disapprove because they don't like his tribe or religion. you really have no clue concerning the topic... kaboninc: the economy was better then. the unemployment rate was very low. a high school graduate can work as a bank clerk in their era. these days, masters degree holders are driving keke napep. when will he save enough to marry a girl whose bride price alone is N1m? ![]() 2 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Alarming Number Of Unmarried Ladies (28 - 39 Yrs) by saaedlee: 8:00pm On Apr 23, 2015 |
lalasticlala: None, excerpts from my M.Sc Project. 2 Likes |
Re: Alarming Number Of Unmarried Ladies (28 - 39 Yrs) by MRBrownJ: 8:02pm On Apr 23, 2015 |
innervoice: sadly, yes to me these are the reasons why such lady would be unmarried at 35, but if you know any other reason, pls do share them with us all. 2 Likes |
Re: Alarming Number Of Unmarried Ladies (28 - 39 Yrs) by Stillfire: 8:03pm On Apr 23, 2015 |
coogar: Buhaha Caucasian grannies. Those numbers will still not upset pairing a Nigerian woman to a Nigerian man. More men are not eligible due to economic factors. So Buhari needs to do something to increase the eligibility pool of men. ![]() 2 Likes |
Re: Alarming Number Of Unmarried Ladies (28 - 39 Yrs) by kaboninc(m): 8:03pm On Apr 23, 2015 |
saaedlee: And your inference from your thesis... |
Re: Alarming Number Of Unmarried Ladies (28 - 39 Yrs) by kaboninc(m): 8:05pm On Apr 23, 2015 |
Stillfire: ![]() |
Re: Alarming Number Of Unmarried Ladies (28 - 39 Yrs) by coogar: 8:05pm On Apr 23, 2015 |
Stillfire: this is another strong point! however, there are situations when these women are ready to fund all the expenses and yet no man wants to marry them. many of the women the OP cited are working professionals. why should the income of the suitor matter if it's all down to economy? 2 Likes |
Re: Alarming Number Of Unmarried Ladies (28 - 39 Yrs) by Jman06(m): 8:06pm On Apr 23, 2015 |
Stillfire:Biology has made it easier to birth more female children than males. Read up the survival chances of the X and Y chromosomes. Also, it is much easier for an older guy to marry a younger girl (even teenagers) than for an older lady to marry a younger guy. That keeps older ladies at disadvantage. However, An older lady stands a chance of getting married even at 45 if she spent her years of spinsterhood developing herself career wise. I am saying this because I know a lady who just got married at 41, and she is a senior staff of one the oil agencies. 2 Likes |
Re: Alarming Number Of Unmarried Ladies (28 - 39 Yrs) by Stillfire: 8:06pm On Apr 23, 2015 |
coogar: Lol is that not the criteria you guys want in your wives? 'Very homely'. Something has to give dude. Boys have to join in the housework , so girls can play outside too. ![]() ![]() 5 Likes |
Re: Alarming Number Of Unmarried Ladies (28 - 39 Yrs) by coogar: 8:07pm On Apr 23, 2015 |
Stillfire: nah.... let them continue to stay in the kitchen. a woman that cannot cook is not eligible for marriage. all her masters degree & ph.d mean squat to me. Jman06: her money is obviously her selling point. if she is teaching arithmetic in a primary school, her chances of getting married would have been halved. in a nutshell, an older lady with loads of cash still have hope. an older lady with no cash should just become a nun. ![]() 7 Likes |
Re: Alarming Number Of Unmarried Ladies (28 - 39 Yrs) by kaboninc(m): 8:09pm On Apr 23, 2015 |
Coogar bride price of 1m? Mbaise abi? |
Re: Alarming Number Of Unmarried Ladies (28 - 39 Yrs) by saaedlee: 8:10pm On Apr 23, 2015 |
kaboninc: Till I get it approved n published, okay? Besides I said its an excerpt from my dissertation. 1 Like |
Re: Alarming Number Of Unmarried Ladies (28 - 39 Yrs) by kaboninc(m): 8:11pm On Apr 23, 2015 |
Stillfire: |
Re: Alarming Number Of Unmarried Ladies (28 - 39 Yrs) by Stillfire: 8:11pm On Apr 23, 2015 |
coogar: They still have their fathers and mothers to contend with... ![]() |
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