InZA:
I . Forget all this hyper-civilization BS....I'm a man and it is my place to be the head, by being the head it doesn't mean she becomes a slave, not at all, but it means she allows me be the man i'm supposed to be by leaving the responsibility of taking care of her to me. What type of a relationship would I be in if I know that my woman doesn't need me or value me because her money has given her everything she could possibly need. I want to be a man, to take care of my woman, I want her to need me in a healthy, loving way that fans my sense of responsibility to her......I could go on and on really,but the bottom line is...Well you know what the bottom line is

See what my fellow women are enjoying in their husband's house and I am here doing boi boi 5 days a week at a job
Azubuike come and read o
You are seriously lacking in your duties
I feel cheated

Actual it is not inferiority complex dude - it's called avoiding an additional cost to your already stretched income* if they would bear their expenses and leave the rest to the basics- costs* what else? Why not? When I mean basics, I mean the normal outing, gifts but nah lie, you never marry you go buy 4 brand new tyre, you send them to go buy car? Imagine O! from your own car to her own car- then her own responsibilities* and they never cut their coat according to their size, nah- local government coat dem go - go dey wear* and expect you to foot the bills, that's all- else - don't they go to the toilet? What's so special about them? Fine face or clothes they bought off the shelf?

olajide8:
Actual it is not inferiority complex dude - it's called avoiding an additional cost to your already stretched income* if they would bear their expenses and leave the rest to the basics- costs* what else? Why not? When I mean basics, I mean the normal outing, gifts but nah lie, you never marry you go buy 4 brand new tyre, you send them to go buy car? Imagine O! from your own car to her own car- then her own responsibilities* and they never cut their coat according to their size, nah- local government coat dem go - go dey wear* and expect you to foot the bills, that's all- else - don't they go to the toilet? What's so special about them? Fine face or clothes they bought off the shelf?

lolz..... who did u like this?

DollyParton1:

lolz..... who did u like this?

I get them plenty O! Now I am looking for the one that would cut her coat according to her own size!
If you don't do some certain things they term you selfish, (T or F), eg you did not send her, she wants to go to dubai- you would be called to pay the air ticket fare* nah lagos abuja marcopolo bus she wan enter? as a man you get your own life O! So instead of you making that mistake- avoid the trouble from a distance* else you would never buy/build a house, na rent you go die put because of their psychologically conjured and supposed success*

abbey621:
What exactly is a successful woman? A woman is only successful if she makes her own money, has a high status among peers and is still able to keep a happy home. Look at the bold words very carefully you'll notice men are not under such restrictions, a man is successful as long as he has money!

I'm surprised that the op is a man and yet able to write things like this on social media. The truth is men are not scared of successful women rather they are scared of the way success changes women. Whether it is Nigeria or abroad, money and power are most dangerous in the hands of a woman. Let me explain further:

1. Women are easily influenced by friends and peers
2. Women are highly emotional creatures, when angry or sad they are most vulnerable.
3.Women want attention at all times and when she dictates the money in the relationship, the man ceases to be a man.

Mix it all together with an atmosphere such as the USA or Europe where women run things and you have CHAOS! Men would stop caring in relationships, go after the successful women, exploit her and dump her for another woman who is submissive. In the Nigerian context, a man cannot truly claim to be successful if he does not provide for his family, men value opinions from the society and would have sleepless nights if we married someone with a dominant personality or someone uncontrollable. Now don't get me wrong we have some successful ladies that are submissive to their husbands but they are very rare, there's something about money that makes human beings go gaga.

If we can think deeply, we would realize the number one thing men want in women is RESPECT. However for women, the number one thing they want in men is for them to be men, to be the head and take charge!

This!

Well said.

Personally, I am not scared of "successful women" but the outcome of the success is scary. OP I guess you live in limbo cos if you lived in naija here you'll know how "disrespectful, arrogant, and sussy" a lady becomes when she earns more than the man. You can't ask her questions, you complain and she tells you "after all I pay the bills" you can't question her movement lol I don't think I can take that call it whatever you like. When I see a good rich woman I will only hope she'll be different but you hardly see that. And answer this, how many women richer than their husbands have a peaceful home here in naija? talk is cheap

abbey621:
What exactly is a successful woman? A woman is only successful if she makes her own money, has a high status among peers and is still able to keep a happy home. Look at the bold words very carefully you'll notice men are not under such restrictions, a man is successful as long as he has money!

I'm surprised that the op is a man and yet able to write things like this on social media. The truth is men are not scared of successful women rather they are scared of the way success changes women. Whether it is Nigeria or abroad, money and power are most dangerous in the hands of a woman. Let me explain further:

1. Women are easily influenced by friends and peers
2. Women are highly emotional creatures, when angry or sad they are most vulnerable.
3.Women want attention at all times and when she dictates the money in the relationship, the man ceases to be a man.

Mix it all together with an atmosphere such as the USA or Europe where women run things and you have CHAOS! Men would stop caring in relationships, go after the successful women, exploit her and dump her for another woman who is submissive. In the Nigerian context, a man cannot truly claim to be successful if he does not provide for his family, men value opinions from the society and would have sleepless nights if we married someone with a dominant personality or someone uncontrollable. Now don't get me wrong we have some successful ladies that are submissive to their husbands but they are very rare, there's something about money that makes human beings go gaga.

If we can think deeply, we would realize the number one thing men want in women is RESPECT. However for women, the number one thing they want in men is for them to be men, to be the head and take charge!

That definition is flawed. A woman's success shouldn't depend on her marital status. Some women do not intend to get married. And as you know, success is relative. How will you term an unmarried woman unsuccessful if getting married or raising kids was never in her aim or purpose.
So you mean to say your manhood depends on only money? That's shallow!!!

The problem with men is that they wanna control their wives. Why will you wanna control your fellow human being? You want to determine your wife's behaviour, where she goes, who she rolls with and all. Its ok if you do that when u sense she is keeping a bad company or something. But can she do that to you too? Y'all just want a robot or something. You need to realize that the hunan race has evolved.

Respect is not a one sided thing, it should be reciprocal.

Rapmoney:
Sincerely speaking, my Nigerian brothers are falling my hands big time!!!

Often times, I hear people (including the male folks!) Saying 'young women that are successful in their respective careers and probably drive cars are no-go area!' That's a huge sign of inferiority complex and an exhibition of shallow mentality!

Is it really an exclusive right for men only to be successful and own cars? Why do we have young women schooling or learning a trade? Is it not to be successful in their chosen careers? Do we expect these women to subject themselves to lack and poverty?

Today, most Nigerian ladies who are successful and unmarried are normally seen as a no-go area for men. They label such women as disrespectful and not submissive under wrong assumptions! This clearly shows a poor mentality of the male folks!!!

Nigerian guys need to live above this poor mentality and accept the fact that becoming successful is not an exclusive right of the male folks...success is all encompassing and can be attained by anyone, irrespective of gender!

Please, feel free to share your views.

Peace!

/
Because of the nature of the Nigerian society, how many young and single ladies drive cars that they bought on their own legal hard work considering the prevalence of local runs and Dubai runs? Inferiority complex is only one of many reasons such ladies are avoided like plagues. Again, there are some exceptions.

A lot of guys are erring on the side of caution.
That's all.

Nollywood movies are not helping the matter as well---psychological programming.

/

Rapmoney:
Yeah, am a Nigerian man but I don't have such backward mentality!

Married? I think No?

Dated an independent woman? I guess NO too and yet you are talking?

Isn't experience the best teacher?

Do you think wife and girlfriend are thesame thing?

Do you have friends that are married to richer women? Have you visited them at home to see how they are being treated?

FYI, Nigeria men are not scared of successful women rather they are scared of control freaks. The type of woman that only feels good about herself if she makes you feel less than her. These are the women that my brothers are scared of.

I have said this before and I will say it again, every man prays for his wife to be successful too. That's why most Igbo men I know open shops for wives once they marry them so that they will start hustling. Are you saying that they open shops for these women and then turn around to pray against their success?

You amaze me op.

Most men insist that their wife must be a graduate, why?

Don't just jump from nowhere and start writing stuffs just to get likes without researching your topic properly. Sha, you have given some half-baked-feminist on here something to talk about but who cares?

NOW LISTEN.

Picture a woman who has personality disorder, someone who automatically become enraged or sullen and withdrawn if she doesn’t get her way. Someone who needles you endlessly until you capitulate, someone whose mood becomes buoyant as she cuts you down. Someone who makes you feel useless, disoriented and helpless.

Then picture where this woman is richer than her husband.

What Do You See?

LISTEN AGAIN.

There are things one needs to succeed in business and work. These things are direct opposite of what we need to have successful marriage and most of these successful women do not know where to cut the line.

To succeed in business, you have to be stubborn, in control etc. Bring these things into your marriage and you are fuked. Some successful women would rather blow the house up and everything in it than compromise or take personal responsibility. Who Wants This?

Women Naturally want to exert control over everything. They enjoy to make those around them feel inadequate, insecure, nervous, angry, anxious and physically sick.

Go to married men that have richer wives and ask them, they will tell you that the message their women pass in everything they do is I don’t trust you to be able to do it right; I don’t respect your judgment; I don’t think you are competent; I don’t value your insight. I can do it all alone

Money brings out the demon in everybody and most women do not know how to control this demon yet.

I Have A Feeling That You Are Eyeing A Rich Sister.

Kataway You

Vickybee:

Must men want women to worship them? Jeez!

Even if she's not successful that doesn't mean she should worship him. For what?

Respect is reciprocal. Husband and wife should respect each other, irregardless.

You don't even have a boyfriend yet you are talking about what most men want.


How many men have you been with to know what we really want?

Tallesty1:
Married? I think No?

Dated an independent woman? I guess NO too and yet you are talking?

Isn't experience the best teacher?

Do you think wife and girlfriend are thesame thing?

Do you have friends that are married to richer women? Have you visited them at home to see how they are being treated?

FYI, Nigeria men are not scared of successful women rather they are scared of control freaks. The type of woman that only feels good about herself if she makes you feel less than her. These are the women that my brothers are scared of.

I have said this before and I will say it again, every man prays for his wife to be successful too. That's why most Igbo men I know open shops for wives once they marry them so that they will start hustling. Are you saying that they open shops for these women and then turn around to pray against their success?

You amaze me op.

Most men insist that their wife must be a graduate, why?

Don't just jump from nowhere and start writing stuffs just to get likes without researching your topic properly. Sha, you have given some half-baked-feminist on here something to talk about but who cares?

NOW LISTEN.

Picture a woman who has personality disorder, someone who automatically become enraged or sullen and withdrawn if she doesn’t get her way. Someone who needles you endlessly until you capitulate, someone whose mood becomes buoyant as she cuts you down. Someone who makes you feel useless, disoriented and helpless.

Then picture where this woman is richer than her husband.

What Do You See?

LISTEN AGAIN.

There are things one needs to succeed in business and work. These things are direct opposite of what we need to have successful marriage and most of these successful women do not know where to cut the line.

To succeed in business, you have to be stubborn, in control etc. Bring these things into your marriage and you are fuked. Some successful women would rather blow the house up and everything in it than compromise or take personal responsibility. Who Wants This?

Women Naturally want to exert control over everything. They enjoy to make those around them feel inadequate, insecure, nervous, angry, anxious and physically sick.

Go to married men that have richer wives and ask them, they will tell you that the message their women pass in everything they do is I don’t trust you to be able to do it right; I don’t respect your judgment; I don’t think you are competent; I don’t value your insight. I can do it all alone

Money brings out the demon in everybody and most women do not know how to control this demon yet.

I Have A Feeling That You Are Eyeing A Rich Sister.

thank you so much for this. I have seen even relationships get blown up because the girl feeds the boy. She totally turned him to a dummy and always reminded him that "is it not my money"" A rich naija guy can comfortably date and marry a poor girl and his senses will still be intact but a rich girl and a poor husband you and I know what she'll become. If a naija lady loses her job the husband can endure forever and manage without reminding her that he pays all the bills but if a man loses his job the woman turns him to something else and this OP can spew thrash here. Comparing naija to western world. So much for the high divorce rate in your "Perfect western world"

babyosisi:


See what my fellow women are enjoying in their husband's house and I am here doing boi boi 5 days a week at a job
Azubuike come and read o
You are seriously lacking in your duties
I feel cheated

I'm not yet married o

So you don't want to work abi

When a woman allows herself to be taken care of by her man, it doesn't mean she should be a dormant and lazy stay at home wife, Abeg continue that your job

The fact still remains,successfull women are no go area,
they are not a wify material
they are proud
they are lazy at home
they believe they are smart
and they lack respect
some of them care about their body than their baby or their husband
if you dont believe me go and try one today and come back here to give us a feed back

bukatyne:
Nigerian society measure the headship or 'goodness' of a husband based on his pocket.

They also see the headship as a license to do as they wish aka unquestionable

A typical Nigerian husband wants to be the 'head' So his pockets has to be heavier than that of his wife.

A number of women do not want to marry a husband that is not the 'head'

Some of the women who earn higher are also very heady too

ur point?

okotv:
What I was taught about marriage helps in excluding all these inferiority complexes and all what not in the 21st century marriages.

ol earz?

Today, most Nigerian ladies who are successful and unmarried are normally seen as a no-go area for men. They label such women as disrespectful and not submissive

u can call it inferiority complex, but the be said..that assertion is correct...
most women tend to have pride and are u controllable especially wen they are richer than their husband..
not like am supporting that though... co both my wife and I will work and pile up money together...

DollyParton1:


That definition is flawed. A woman's success shouldn't depend on her marital status. Some women do not intend to get married. And as you know, success is relative. How will you term an unmarried woman unsuccessful if getting married or raising kids was never in her aim or purpose.
So you mean to say your manhood depends on only money? That's shallow!!!

The problem with men is that they wanna control their wives. Why will you wanna control your fellow human being? You want to determine your wife's behaviour, where she goes, who she rolls with and all. Its ok if you do that when u sense she is keeping a bad company or something. But can she do that to you too? Y'all just want a robot or something. You need to realize that we have evolved.

Respect is not a one sided thing, it should be reciprocal.

you sound like a lady that will lock up her husband in a toilet if he is not as moneysom as you are.

Rapmoney:
Sincerely speaking, my Nigerian brothers are falling my hands big time!!!

Often times, I hear people (including the male folks!) Saying 'young women that are successful in their respective careers and probably drive cars are no-go area!' That's a huge sign of inferiority complex and an exhibition of shallow mentality!

Is it really an exclusive right for men only to be successful and own cars? Why do we have young women schooling or learning a trade? Is it not to be successful in their chosen careers? Do we expect these women to subject themselves to lack and poverty?

Today, most Nigerian ladies who are successful and unmarried are normally seen as a no-go area for men. They label such women as disrespectful and not submissive under wrong assumptions! This clearly shows a poor mentality of the male folks!!!

Nigerian guys need to live above this poor mentality and accept the fact that becoming successful is not an exclusive right of the male folks...success is all encompassing and can be attained by anyone, irrespective of gender!

Please, feel free to share your views.

B
Peace!

Bro, as long as she is not proud I can marry her though I will make sure I am up and doing.

Rapmoney:
Sincerely speaking, my Nigerian brothers are falling my hands big time!!!

Often times, I hear people (including the male folks!) Saying 'young women that are successful in their respective careers and probably drive cars are no-go area!' That's a huge sign of inferiority complex and an exhibition of shallow mentality!

Is it really an exclusive right for men only to be successful and own cars? Why do we have young women schooling or learning a trade? Is it not to be successful in their chosen careers? Do we expect these women to subject themselves to lack and poverty?

Today, most Nigerian ladies who are successful and unmarried are normally seen as a no-go area for men. They label such women as disrespectful and not submissive under wrong assumptions! This clearly shows a poor mentality of the male folks!!!

Nigerian guys need to live above this poor mentality and accept the fact that becoming successful is not an exclusive right of the male folks...success is all encompassing and can be attained by anyone, irrespective of gender!

Please, feel free to share your views.

Peace!

Your tone is partial.

Rapmoney:
You should know this is not a universal phenomenon but particular to Nigerian men. What does this show? It shows that Nigerian men are still holding on to that assumption that shows men have the exclusive right to be the successful ones only! That's where am coming from

Those who married successful women end up in divorce google it ba

GEJ TILL 2019! HOW IT WILL HAPPEN I DO NOT KNOW.

InZA:
I was discussing this same topic with someone this past weekend. The truth of the matter is, I have a very high impression of myself that some people may feel borders on pride, In other words, low self esteem is not an issue that affects me at all, there are very many things I'm personally proud of that eat up any trace of low self esteem if ever it suggests itself. That said, I can't even date a girl that has a car(I don't have a car yet) not to talk of getting married to a girl that's more FINANCIALLY placed than I am.


It has nothing to do with inferiority complex, as far as I'm concerned it's more about being responsible for my peace of mind. Show me a single lady that's rich and well to do, and I'll show you a lady that has been thickened with 50 layers of re-enforced pride and arrogance(It's just natural). The flip argument here will be "Ohh not all well to do single ladies are cocky"....As true as that may be, those who are not cocky only represent a tiny fraction compare to those who are.


So why date or marry a lady who would trash you down at the slightest opportunity. Forget all this hyper-civilization BS....I'm a man and it is my place to be the head, by being the head it doesn't mean she becomes a slave, not at all, but it means she allows me be the man i'm supposed to be by leaving the responsibility of taking care of her to me. What type of a relationship would I be in if I know that my woman doesn't need me or value me because her money has given her everything she could possibly need. I want to be a man, to take care of my woman, I want her to need me in a healthy, loving way that fans my sense of responsibility to her......I could go on and on really,but the bottom line is...Well you know what the bottom line is

more wisdom to your grey matter. U nailed it!!!

This is a very interesting topic. When a man feels inferior around a lady with high earnings, it says alot about his personality. Real men dont let their financial status influence their decisions, d real asset is d wealth of ur mind and level of exposure. At d end of d day dats all u ve, trust me, it doesnt matter if a woman makes a milion dollars daily, she would b submissive if she feels more complete around u, in a nutshell, her money is garbage if ure not in her life, u dnt need 2 b rich to attract or even marry a very successful woman but u do need a trophy mentality

cococandy:
So it's all about head huh?

yes o o

There's just a lot to deal with. It takes a very high level of maturity. Provided the guy is not lazy. Toungues will surely wag.

bukatyne:
Nigerian society measure the headship or 'goodness' of a husband based on his pocket.

They also see the headship as a license to do as they wish aka unquestionable

A typical Nigerian husband wants to be the 'head' So his pockets has to be heavier than that of his wife.

A number of women do not want to marry a husband that is not the 'head'

Some of the women who earn higher are also very heady too

Oya, give us the conclusion of the matter

Not really about possessing inferiority complex. Most atimes, such women are very rude in their manners and no man wants to be with a woman who lacks respect for her.

jaysan82:
This is a very interesting topic. When a man feels inferior around a lady with high earnings, it says alot about his personality. Real men dont let their financial status influence their decisions, d real asset is d wealth of ur mind and level of exposure. At d end of d day dats all u ve, trust me, it doesnt matter if a woman makes a milion dollars daily, she would b submissive if she feels more complete around u, in a nutshell, her money is garbage if ure not in her life, u dnt need 2 b rich to attract or even marry a very successful woman but u do need a trophy mentality

@the bolded, pls tell me where such women are. Comon tell me like I said, talk is cheap. From history/present we have seen opposite here in nigeria, what do you expect us to do? Keep diving in what precedence has thought us? You don't see people make such mistakes and still jump into such. And like I said, tell me where such women are let me go and marry quick.

Seems the op has some financially stable female cousins who are yet to find a man who would insert rings on their fingers. Anyways op, not only women can GOLD DIG. Push one to my side make i join the queue but if she becomes rude, expect to see her back home asap (that's after i must've finished GOLD DIGGING).

my dear you will only feel inferior if you're really inferior as a person compared to Your partner. Money or not.
So if a guy feels inferior to his woman, he's probably truly inferior.

If you're a great quality person, even the one with money will respect you willingly or unwillingly.
You will just command the respect without trying

It is better to earn people's respect than to command it. People who command respect are authoritarian or Choleric in temperament.

jaysan82:
she would b submissive if she feels more complete around u, in a nutshell, her money is garbage if ure not in her life, u dnt need 2 b rich to attract or even marry a very successful woman but u do need a trophy mentality

am intrested in dis n i have my reason

Rapmoney:
Sincerely speaking, my Nigerian brothers are falling my hands big time!!!

Often times, I hear people (including the male folks!) Saying 'young women that are successful in their respective careers and probably drive cars are no-go area!' That's a huge sign of inferiority complex and an exhibition of shallow mentality!

Is it really an exclusive right for men only to be successful and own cars? Why do we have young women schooling or learning a trade? Is it not to be successful in their chosen careers? Do we expect these women to subject themselves to lack and poverty?

Today, most Nigerian ladies who are successful and unmarried are normally seen as a no-go area for men. They label such women as disrespectful and not submissive under wrong assumptions! This clearly shows a poor mentality of the male folks!!!

Nigerian guys need to live above this poor mentality and accept the fact that becoming successful is not an exclusive right of the male folks...success is all encompassing and can be attained by anyone, irrespective of gender!

Please, feel free to share your views.

Peace!

I think you are op, as a matter of fact most men appreciate successful women. The only issue is wen the woman's success begins to outshine the man to the point he isnt seen as d head of the family. That wen the ego thing vomes in and he begins to feel threatened and insecured.. cos men like to be the head