Every woman, at sometime in her life, has faced the undeniable dilemma of needing to use the bathroom around a man.

Every woman has faced the tug of war between her head and her bottom. Every woman has cursed God and herself for having such a thing as an anus.

For now, there’s nothing to do but either get used to the pain or learn not to give a f*ck. I strongly suggest the latter.

So for all women either just experiencing the pain or looking for some compassion, here are the irrational thoughts we’ve all had before taking a sh*t at our boyfriend’s place.

1. F*ck, my stomach hurts.

2. I shouldn’t have eaten that Thai food.

3. I just shouldn’t eat anymore.

4. No, no more eating.

5. That’s it, only celery and water.

6. F*ck, I’m hungry.

7. F*ck, I don’t know if I can hold this one.

8. Does he live near a Starbucks?

9. Of course he doesn’t.

10. I should just go.

11. But I don’t want to go.

12. But why should I have to feel bad about going?

13. I mean, if we’re going to be serious, then he’s going to have to know.

14. If he loves me, he won’t care.

15. If he’s a real man, he won’t care.

16. But what if it’s too soon?

17. What if I turn him off forever?

18. Sh*t, I’m going to fart.

19. I’m going to fart.

20. No, I’m going to hold it in if my life f*cking depends on it.

21. But which is worse?

22. Maybe if I fart, I won’t have to sh*t.

23. If I could just let out a little gas, maybe the pain will go away.

24. But what if it makes noise?

25. But what if it smells?

26. There are just two of us here.

27. He’ll know it’s me.

28. A smelly fart is way worse than a sh*t.

29. F*ck the fart.

30. I could probably wait another hour.

31. Maybe I’ll set my alarm for 4 am

32. Should I just go home?

33. Should I say I’m on my period?

34. Sh*t, I can’t hold this in anymore.

35. Maybe I can disguise it by taking a shower.

36. But why would I need to take a shower right now?

37. I’ll just stop thinking about it.

38. It will pass.

39. I hope he doesn’t suggest anal.

40. Maybe if he does, I can blame it on him.

41. Will he hear if I flush twice?

42. Can I cough louder than a flush?

43. If I flush right when it happens, there will be no smell.

44. Are those walls thin?

45. Will he notice if I’m in there for more than five minutes?

46. Is there even a lock on that door?

47. I hate men.

48. Maybe I can suggest we leave right after.

49. Go to a bar or something?

50. What if his roommate goes in after?

51. What if he and his roommate call me “poop girl”?

52. That’s it, I’m going.

53. I’m going. I’m going. I’m going.

54. Sh*t.

55. I just flushed this relationship down the toilet.

..

Go get a life.

A B C D E F

this is funny, but it goes both ways na, not only girls

IamOdin:
Go get a life.

how does your response related to the thread

Bozo like you!

Orijin101:

dafuq is diz one saying

take chilled origin to cool off broff

BaebieHot:
this is funny, but it goes both ways na, not only girls

hmmm...deal breaker

Girls don dey form like say dem no dey _shit since 1 B.C.E

Who wants to go dining with me tonight? I swear we'll have lots of butterfish. You'll love it. Yummy.

dechandel:
Nonsenze.
Excuse yourself!! Waka enter toilet, if tissue no dey holla make him bring one.. Offload and cleanup..
Come out.. Shikena

your too blunt Damn

I think this wl later make the over hyped fp. Just in case, i came, i saw, i read, i shook my head, i smiled a little, i imagined the face spewing this, i clicked on reply, i expressed my view of the thread, i looked @ pple's comment, i wished no one sees mine, i commented, i followed in case..., i stopped typing, i envisaged bashing, i begged in advance, i searched for submit panel, i found it, i clicked done first, i clicked submit second, then i left third and waits for bashing/banging/likes/shares/mentions fourth.

^^ cocaine is a hell of a drug!!

JbravoAdodger:
^^ cocaine is a hell of a drug!!

BaebieHot:
this is funny, but it goes both ways na, not only girls

most guys wont mind.. Straight to da toilet