its now a common trend dat husbands leaves their wives nd kids at home to hustle in foreign countries.sme stayed for a year,some 6months before visting again.,when they visit,they stay for abt 1 month before leaving again..hw does it feel to leave ur sponse 4 such a long tyme nd ur responsiblities to u wifey..how does d kids feel like..any ill-effects as a result of this? imagine marrying a new wife during december nd leaving her for 6months to u place of hustling..

Hmnn

Together we stand...where he goes, we follow

That much distance in an early marriage takes toll on the relationship between the hubby and the wifey....but what's my business...doesn't stop ppl frm doing it

one of d causes of extra marital affairs

I know of a woman whose husband has been away for the past 4years. He only came in last year around
September and stayed just for 3days then left.He's in a foreign land hustling.

I don't see my self leaving my family o. Staying away for far too long is a recipe for cheating.

Those are usually "open" marriages

The man will be getting his groove on when away, eventually the wife will realizes she's been getting the shorter end of the stick and she'll step up her game too.

aderonila18:
Those are usually "open" marriages

The man will be getting his groove on when away, even tidally the wife will realizes she's been getting the shorter end of the stick and she'll step up her game too.

so this is what you will do if you find your self in a marriage where distance keeps you both apart for long? Hmm.

2goodbobo:
I know of a woman whose husband has been away for the past 4years. He only came in last year around
September and stayed just for 3days then left.He's in a foreign land hustling.

I don't see my self leaving my family o. Staying away for far too long is a recipe for cheating.

@ Chibic, see that ! 3days in 4years and you think eventually both parties won't fall into temptation I can never find myself in such , will he tell me he isn't cheating for those 4years more like steady girlfriends sef I no fit but some may choose to stay in such and have an open marriage (only difference is Oyibo will tell each other while Nigerians will be pretending but deep down they know)since the hustling is more important to them , it's all about choices. Most long term long distance marriages especially those with neither party travelling to see the other frequently will Have both partners cheating at some point or the other

cerzo:
its now a common trend dat husbands leaves their wives nd kids at home to hustle in foreign countries.sme stayed for a year,some 6months before visting again.,when they visit,they stay for abt 1 month before leaving again..hw does it feel to leave ur sponse 4 such a long tyme nd ur responsiblities to u wifey..how does d kids feel like..any ill-effects as a result of this? imagine marrying a new wife during december nd leaving her for 6months to u place of hustling..

Man no hustle,problem
E hustle problem again
Ah ah
Allow them to hustle na
What is he staying with me and the kids for when he is not bringing anything home,are we going to eat his face?
Let him go out there and hustle jare

Life can be dynamic. Its not always black or white.

The only countryman I have in this school is a married man. He's been married for a year plus now. He is doing his PhD here. His wife and son in Nigeria. He is making serious efforts to bring them as soon as possible and even though we've become good neighbours over these months, he is a very disciplined man and that I respect.

So it's not always about hugging and curdling. He needs the degree and sacrifices has to be made.

flyca:
Life can be dynamic. Its not always black or white.

The only countryman I have in this school is a married man. He's been married for a year plus now. He is doing his PhD here. His wife and son in Nigeria. He is making serious efforts to bring them as soon as possible and even though we've become good neighbours over these months, he is a very disciplined man and that I respect.

So it's not always about hugging and curdling. He needs the degree and sacrifices has to be made.

honestly, this type of situation where couples gets seperated for months/yrs always encourage infidelity. Some people are sex maniacs. Some can's go for two weeks without sex and I believe any man married to this type of women should know. I know a woman that started sleeping with her best frien'd husband because her own husband travelled for masters. This started after three months since he travelled. She wasn't caught, but the story slipped off the man's tongue while gisting with friends. Another problem is that some will know the nature of their partners job yet, they will marry and then look for alternative when he's out for long.
If my job takes me around, then I'll look a woman with a very low libido to marry. I think that's better.

babyosisi:


Man no hustle,problem
E hustle problem again
Ah ah
Allow them to hustle na
What is he staying with me and the kids for when he is not bringing anything home,are we going to eat his face?
Let him go out there and hustle jare

Yes, but to meet for just three days in four whole years? Which kind yeye hustling be that? My sister, body nor be wood.

...Wherever you go, I go. Your people shall be my people. Your God my God...

#something chapter something verse something#

Otherwise there is fire on the mountain with that union.

chibic:
honestly, this type of situation where couples gets seperated for months/yrs always encourage infidelity. Some people are sex maniacs. Some can's go for two weeks without sex and I believe any man married to this type of women should know. I know a woman that started sleeping with her best frien'd husband because her own husband travelled for masters. This started after three months since he travelled. She wasn't caught, but the story slipped off the man's tongue while gisting with friends. Another problem is that some will know the nature of their partners job yet, they will marry and then look for alternative when he's out for long.
If my job takes me around, then I'll look a woman with a very low libido to marry. I think that's better.

Now this is more like it.

Well said.

Are you rutu?




is your name Ruth abokoku that you wan dey follow am quench ?

EfemenaXY:


Yes, but to meet for just three days in four whole years? Which kind yeye hustling be that? My sister, body nor be wood.

...Wherever you go, I go. Your people shall be my people. Your God my God...

#something chapter something verse something#

Otherwise there is fire on the mountain with that union.

SAMBARRY:
Are you rutu?

is your name Ruth abokoku that you wan dey follow am quench ?

Ahh, you're back! Welcome.

My dear, it's not about being a Ruth, but being totally honest with oneself, and having realistic expectations.

It even begs the question: why bother getting married in the first place if the couple will be apart for donkey years on end?

it depends on what ever they have discussed prior to their wedding besides this old Tyler Perry movie explains it all. I'm referring to the movie "why did I get married"



And o yes I am back for good



till another ban resurfaces then irunoko will have to resume duty

EfemenaXY:


Ahh, you're back! Welcome.

My dear, it's not about being a Ruth, but being totally honest with oneself, and having realistic expectations.

It even begs the question: why bother getting married in the first place if the couple will be apart for donkey years on end?

Dis is some risky stuff. Me cant even doe long distance dating sef na for marriage me want come try am?

Meanwhile, @ OP, pls recheck and correct ur heading. Its "abroad" and not "aboard".

chibic:
honestly, this type of situation where couples gets seperated for months/yrs always encourage infidelity. Some people are sex maniacs. Some can's go for two weeks without sex and I believe any man married to this type of women should know. I know a woman that started sleeping with her best frien'd husband because her own husband travelled for masters. This started after three months since he travelled. She wasn't caught, but the story slipped off the man's tongue while gisting with friends. Another problem is that some will know the nature of their partners job yet, they will marry and then look for alternative when he's out for long.
If my job takes me around, then I'll look a woman with a very low libido to marry. I think that's better.

Muchecheche
Boy: Hey girl, I work with xyz multinational. My job requires I trottle round the globe and beyond. But it sure pays a lot. Do you have high or low libido?

flyca:


Muchecheche
Boy: Hey girl, I work with xyz multinational. My job requires I trottle round the globe and beyond. But it sure pays a lot. Do you have high or low libido?

>

SAMBARRY:
it depends on what ever they have discussed prior to their wedding besides this old Tyler Perry movie explains it all. I'm referring to the movie "why did I get married"

And o yes I am back for good

till another ban resurfaces then irunoko will have to resume duty

That's why I said their expectations need to be realistic.

It's always easy to "talk the talk", but not so easy to "walk it".

EfemenaXY:


That's why I said their expectations need to be realistic.

It's always easy to "talk the talk", but not so easy to "walk it".

Gbam. Another word of wisdom from EfemenaXY

why is sex the only problem u people see?companionship nko?ur kids wil grow wt no father figure til daddy gets bak?nobody to hold ur hands when u have malaria abi when d kids get sick,the woman bcomes the man of the house too!
heard of a lady whose Fiance came frm america to marry and went back after a week,luckily she got preggies and lost it after 2months due to stress.the man had startd the shipping process of a car for her immediatly she got pregnant,when she didt hear abt it for few months she asked him,he sed he stopped it till further notice ,fast froward 2years,the lady kept begging to come/he comes,he says he cnt come when hes not sure another baby will stay to term,imagine that.the lady is a devoted Muslim and hung btw divorce and keeeping on cos she sed the man has totally changed and rarely calls!
If hubby is transferd to Ib from lagos,na to pack up n follow o!

aderonila18:
Those are usually "open" marriages

The man will be getting his groove on when away, eventually the wife will realizes she's been getting the shorter end of the stick and she'll step up her game too.

That is part of it nau
If you separate for long periods,that is inevitable
Body no be wood
Many of the men have flings in their hustling locations and before time many of the woman will also find some side bobos to keep them happy when he is gone

EfemenaXY:


Yes, but to meet for just three days in four whole years? Which kind yeye hustling be that? My sister, body nor be wood.

...Wherever you go, I go. Your people shall be my people. Your God my God...

#something chapter something verse something#

Otherwise there is fire on the mountain with that union.

I was being sarcastic
What you described is not marriage
There was a story of a woman whose husband was very demanding and he is also a workaholic and travels a lot for work and comes home very late at night around midnight.
One day he gave his wife his rules and said look this woman whenever I return home this house must be spotless,there must be hot food on the table minutes after,warm bath waiting,my pyjamas laid out,you must massage my feet before I sleep and pick out my clothes and iron them ready for the morning.no matter when I return you must do these things.
She said yes sir and I have only one rule
The husband asked what it was
She said I will do everything you asked ,I even put the kids to bed at 7 PM,but my only rule is that there must be sex on our bed exactly at 8 PM every night with or without you.

Op, you're still talking about 6months, some leave theirs for years... They come home every two years to impregnate their wives, then travel... To most of those guys, they only need a woman at home to have children for them, help their aged mothers and not necessarily a wife because they always know beforehand that they won't/can't obtain visa for their spouses.. Most times, they lie and promise the wife to be how they would take her abroad, do this, do that and then our ladies who are so fascinated about 'obodo oyibo'(abroad husband) fall victims. .

The ladies only realise they have been 'scammed' after about 2years of hearing different excuses from their husbands on how hard it's been obtaining visas for them...
The annoying thing is that most times the mothers take part in the lies, they go about convincing the ladies. in most cases, na them dey even arrange the lady for their son

Ladies, make una shine una eyes ooo... if any obodo oyibo husband comes, tell am make una process visa first before marriage ... Except you enjoy distance marriage. ..
I rest my case, it's well.. if you're in this situation, God's your strength. ..

Then to abroad husbands here, if you know you can't obtain a visa for your wife, then marry from where you're, stop keeping ladies in 'misery' here.. what's the essence of marriage without companionship? ?

MarvellousGod:
Op, you're still talking about 6months, some leave theirs for years... They come home every two years to impregnate their wives, then travel... To most of those guys, they only need a woman at home to have children for them, help their aged mothers and not necessarily a wife because they always know beforehand that they won't/can't obtain visa for their spouses.. Most times, they lie and promise the wife to be how they would take her abroad, do this, do that and then our ladies who are so fascinated about 'obodo oyibo'(abroad husband) fall victims. .

The ladies only realise they have been 'scammed' after about 2years of hearing different excuses from their husbands on how hard it's been obtaining visas for them...
The annoying thing is that most times the mothers take part in the lies, they go about convincing the ladies. in most cases, na them dey even arrange the lady for their son

Ladies, make una shine una eyes ooo... if any obodo oyibo husband comes, tell am make una process visa first before marriage ... Except you enjoy distance marriage. ..
I rest my case, it's well.. if you're in this situation, God's your strength. ..

Then to abroad husbands here, if you know you can't obtain a visa for your wife, then marry from where you're, stop keeping ladies in 'misery' here.. what's the essence of marriage without companionship? ?

Many of the men have wife and children at their abroadian stations
Their naija wife is just to satisfy their moms
She will be there doing boi boi for mother inlaw and running to western union every month to collect naira
That ought to be enough
I have already given out websites and tips on how they can check out their Americana suitors and find out if they are married,divorced,have criminal records etc
A fiancée visa takes about 6 months
If he can't get you over as a fiancée,forget him,many have been scammed

babyosisi:


Many of the men have wife and children at their abroadian stations
Their naija wife is just to satisfy their moms
She will be there doing boi boi for mother inlaw and running to western union every month to collect naira
That ought to be enough
I have already given out websites and tips on how they can check out their Americana suitors and find out if they are married,divorced,have criminal records etc
A fiancée visa takes about 6 months
If he can't get you over as a fiancée,forget him,many have been scammed

Please can you post the website here as well, thanks ma'am

babyosisi:


Many of the men have wife and children at their abroadian stations
Their naija wife is just to satisfy their moms
She will be there doing boi boi for mother inlaw and running to western union every month to collect naira
That ought to be enough
I have already given out websites and tips on how they can check out their Americana suitors and find out if they are married,divorced,have criminal records etc
A fiancée visa takes about 6 months
If he can't get you over as a fiancée,forget him,many have been scammed

Yeahh, so right. ..

But sadly, despite warnings a lot of ladies still fall victims. . They entice them with material things. . It's well..

Like someone said "wherever he goeth i followeth". No time to tok long tory. I've seen so many cases of women waiting on their "abroad" husbands for years while the fellow is rocking the boat over there.
Hmmn wetin consign me sef

babyosisi:


I was being sarcastic
What you described is not marriage
There was a story of a woman whose husband was very demanding and he is also a workaholic and travels a lot for work and comes home very late at night around midnight.
One day he gave his wife his rules and said look this woman whenever I return home this house must be spotless,there must be hot food on the table minutes after,warm bath waiting,my pyjamas laid out,you must massage my feet before I sleep and pick out my clothes and iron them ready for the morning.no matter when I return you must do these things.
She said yes sir and I have only one rule
The husband asked what it was
She said I will do everything you asked ,I even put the kids to bed at 7 PM,but my only rule is that there must be sex on our bed exactly at 8 PM every night with or without you.

Lol! Yeah, I've heard that story too.

But seriously, I honestly can't get my head around such long distance "relationships".

Three days in four years? It's soooo obvious the guy only came back to impregnate her. But wait oh! Three days is not possible jor. He got a three day visa? Abi he got a month's visa and out of the 31 days, decided to "spend" just three days with his "wife"?? Ridiculous. Even side chicks and Ashewos get a better deal.

Anyway, to each their own sha.

i hve every reason to believe dat our babes re easily enticed by flashy thngs nd sme as a result of frustration..if u husband to be cares so much 4 u,he shld arrange 4 court marriage first..then process u visa 4 u..plan d traditional nd white weddn..nd take u along as he is leaving..