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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / Things Your Fiancé/ husband Is Better Off Not Knowing. (89069 Views)
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Re: Things Your Fiancé/ husband Is Better Off Not Knowing. by Nobody: 1:15pm On May 28, 2015 |
Kollyman: I believe you. You've just nailed it 1 Like |
Re: Things Your Fiancé/ husband Is Better Off Not Knowing. by Nobody: 1:16pm On May 28, 2015 |
AZeD1: Good one and I hope it quells all the hypocrisy here. They will say it affects medically...but fail to realise the other might affect mentally which is also important for all round well-being. It is just like a man convicted of multiple child molestation in Zimbabwe in the past and then relocates to Nigeria after serving 17 years in prison......and he is encouraged to let the past be the past by not revealing it to his bride to be because he has repented. Jeez!!! Nigerians and fraud!!! 3 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Things Your Fiancé/ husband Is Better Off Not Knowing. by CSTR2: 1:17pm On May 28, 2015 |
If my wife had a gory past or cheated on me and i found out after marriage or by myself, then sorry, the marriage is over. I hate it when people try to take me for a fool. If she came clean on her own volition, i probably would overlook it after a serious reprimand as long as it does not have any long-time consequences. 1 Like |
Re: Things Your Fiancé/ husband Is Better Off Not Knowing. by oje4u(m): 1:18pm On May 28, 2015 |
The secret you resolved to take down to grave is right dr in your soul, and it will condemn you in the after world. Face the challenge and confess all to your spouse so you can find rest in the world after. He or She just need your love so far you've changed. 2 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Things Your Fiancé/ husband Is Better Off Not Knowing. by Nobody: 1:20pm On May 28, 2015 |
cococandy: I guess controversy is my middle name ![]() ![]() ![]() Every wise woman knows the things I wrote there are 100% truth Something prompted this thread I have watched a marriage where the man had cheated many times then separated a few times.THey came back together and he moved to the guest room and totally neglected her then in that weak moment after months of torture,she had sex with an older family friend who basically took advantage of her vulnerability ,one day when the marriage seemed to be on the up,filled with guilt and without wisdom she knelt down ,cried and confessed and he divorced her. True story Up till this moment every story is about her cheating no one ever mentions his If she had come to me with her guilt,God knows I would have advised her to shut her mouth . SHe also regrets confessing [size=18pt] So ladies,if you are a good woman who wandered, confess to your God and keep your mouth shut [/size] Imagine the stains 1. The marriage is over 2. The whole world knows what you did including little kids [size=18pt]Keep your mouths shut I say[/size] 5 Likes |
Re: Things Your Fiancé/ husband Is Better Off Not Knowing. by jadelyn007(f): 1:22pm On May 28, 2015 |
Depending on the kind of man u r with. Had a friend who cheated on her man n got pregnant, she confessed and was truely remorseful. The guy forgave and today they are married. As for me if I happen to cheat mistakenly I aint confessing nada ![]() The only kind of info I'd be confessing is if I have HIV, a kid somewhere, been a prostitute or a damaged womb. Apart from the above mentioned, what the hell u want to know my body count for ![]() ![]() Some info are not necessary unless it has a potential of damaging the relationship. If u cheated, but u r sorry and u r sure there r no loose ends in d affair u had, STFU please unless u are not interested in the relationship anymore. Summary of the whole gist, weigh whatever info before letting it out 3 Likes |
Re: Things Your Fiancé/ husband Is Better Off Not Knowing. by InZA: 1:23pm On May 28, 2015 |
Ploutos: There's no part of the Op's post that resonates with me. I absolutely, completely and emphatically disagree with all her points from 1 to 3 and any other number that follows after, from the same source. It is clearly written in the good book that prescribes the tenets for marriage - "A man shall leave his father and his mother and shall CLEAVE [be joined], to his wife and the [previously, before, up until now] two, shall become one flesh [united, inseparable, a reflection of each other] " Adhering to the quoted verse above, it is absolutely impossible to hide anything from your spouse because by implication, you've become your spouse and your spouse has become you. When you look into the mirror... You see your spouse.... If that is the case, can you hide any injury from yourself?... If you stand in front of the mirror is there any part of your body that is hidden from your conscious self?. I believe you should bare everything to your spouse. If your are going to leave out your past or any such elements like that, it means your spouse is not marrying you, the whole you, he's only marrying the fraction you have chosen to allow him know and that defeats the concept of onesness in marriage. #Mythoughts 4 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Things Your Fiancé/ husband Is Better Off Not Knowing. by VolvoS60(m): 1:24pm On May 28, 2015 |
kilode100: ^^^^ ![]() ![]() ![]() 1 Like |
Re: Things Your Fiancé/ husband Is Better Off Not Knowing. by Daddi: 1:24pm On May 28, 2015 |
Gaborone:Be blessed the wise one 3 Likes |
Re: Things Your Fiancé/ husband Is Better Off Not Knowing. by Nobody: 1:26pm On May 28, 2015 |
babyosisi: The man cheated and the onus laid on her to walk away but she did not. She did the same and the man also had the opportunity of making a decision. I repeat, God will never bless any marriage built on FRAUD. Stop encouraging fraud 8 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Things Your Fiancé/ husband Is Better Off Not Knowing. by Nobody: 1:30pm On May 28, 2015 |
1stCitizen: Infact if a man is cheating without remorse and the wife is also doing her thing on the side without remorse ,I won't even condemn her They fit each other.they are a perfect match.Let her even come home with strange kids and call them his,I won't condemn her in that situation,it's a draw That is a different thread though ![]() ![]() |
Re: Things Your Fiancé/ husband Is Better Off Not Knowing. by 9jatatafo(m): 1:32pm On May 28, 2015 |
AZeD1: You are the one spreading fallacy. Are all secrets shady? Stop misinterpreting what you don't know. 1 Like |
Re: Things Your Fiancé/ husband Is Better Off Not Knowing. by Nobody: 1:33pm On May 28, 2015 |
babyosisi: At the risk of derailing this thread, I disagree.....in such situation they do not have any business being together. Marriage should not be a do or die affair. |
Re: Things Your Fiancé/ husband Is Better Off Not Knowing. by Nobody: 1:33pm On May 28, 2015 |
babyosisi:The same God said confess your faults one to another. There is no repentance without confession. Truth is, if you have an ugly past, get over it yourself first. Amend your ways (if you haven't) and love the new you. Anyone that finds it difficult to accept your past doesn't love you. This is what love is - not the feeling. Yes it matters! It matters a lot. Any information that will the decision to sign the dotted lines matters. Else, you would be living a lie and committing fraud. Just so you know, ugly truths always have way of coming to the surface. PS: Opening up applies to both the man and woman. 3 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Things Your Fiancé/ husband Is Better Off Not Knowing. by Daddi: 1:35pm On May 28, 2015 |
@ babyosisi, I pity any lady that goes with this ur idea. Trust is key in "A GOOD" marriage. Whenever its affected, trust me you won't like the union again. Secondly marriage is not a tussle ground or a place man and woman drag equality. Have a lot to say but in summary 7/10 ladies that practice the core of this your advice 'll live in regret of it. I'm settling a similar case of this presently 3 Likes 3 Shares |
Re: Things Your Fiancé/ husband Is Better Off Not Knowing. by Nobody: 1:35pm On May 28, 2015 |
Ploutos: Stop using the scripture fraudulently There is no place the bible encourages anyone to go talking about their past When Jesus met the prostitute the people wanted to stone,he forgave her and asked the crowd to cast a stone if they hadn't sinned He didn't tell her to go telling the wives of all the men she had chopped to forgive her. It wasn't necessary The bible says let him who stole,steal no more So let she who chopped,chop no more Fornication is a sin one commits against one's own body If God forgives you and you have forgiven yourself,that ends it Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a person commits are outside the body, but whoever sins sexually, sins against their own body. |
Re: Things Your Fiancé/ husband Is Better Off Not Knowing. by 9jatatafo(m): 1:36pm On May 28, 2015 |
BABE3: How I wish God can just open your records in the book of life and we will see how clean you are 3 Likes |
Re: Things Your Fiancé/ husband Is Better Off Not Knowing. by Nobody: 1:36pm On May 28, 2015 |
Gaborone:Women like you still give us hope for finding a virtuous wife unlike the poster. @Babyosisi: God help your Husband,if this is what you will teach your daughters,God help them too. 7 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: Things Your Fiancé/ husband Is Better Off Not Knowing. by Nobody: 1:36pm On May 28, 2015 |
InZA:Well said!! 1 Like 2 Shares |
Re: Things Your Fiancé/ husband Is Better Off Not Knowing. by Nobody: 1:37pm On May 28, 2015 |
What a shameful write up. 4 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Things Your Fiancé/ husband Is Better Off Not Knowing. by Nobody: 1:41pm On May 28, 2015 |
The Poster is actually forcing people to accept her point of view. Now that's a guilty persons action,Madam you didn't have to come to nairaland for us to help soot the decision you have made to deceive your hubby,in as much as there are more of women like you in this world,please try not to poison the character of those who have decided that openness and honesty is a virtue they will uphold. you give women a bad name. 6 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: Things Your Fiancé/ husband Is Better Off Not Knowing. by cococandy(f): 1:43pm On May 28, 2015 |
@bold ![]() ![]() ![]() Jahblessme: |
Re: Things Your Fiancé/ husband Is Better Off Not Knowing. by bukatyne(f): 1:43pm On May 28, 2015 |
babyosisi: I think This is one aspect that really discourages coming out clean for women But again, the wife was not forced to forgive the man na. She made her decision, the husband made his. Though the husband should have let go. His case is like the story of the wicked servant in the Bible. |
Re: Things Your Fiancé/ husband Is Better Off Not Knowing. by Nobody: 1:45pm On May 28, 2015 |
Jahblessme: Don't mind them You have spoken wisely Confess the necessary things only. He is not your God 1 Like |
Re: Things Your Fiancé/ husband Is Better Off Not Knowing. by Nobody: 1:46pm On May 28, 2015 |
babyosisi: James 5:16...Confess your sins to one another. 1 Like |
Re: Things Your Fiancé/ husband Is Better Off Not Knowing. by bukatyne(f): 1:46pm On May 28, 2015 |
Gaidenk: The OP gave her opinion on an issue and supports it. This is not about teaching women to deceive their husbands or not. I am 100% sure a lot of men Don't come clean to Their spouses too. 1 Like |
Re: Things Your Fiancé/ husband Is Better Off Not Knowing. by armyofone(m): 1:47pm On May 28, 2015 |
The bolded is ![]() babyosisi: |
Re: Things Your Fiancé/ husband Is Better Off Not Knowing. by Nobody: 1:48pm On May 28, 2015 |
babyosisi:You are accusing me of something you just did with this post which I didn't do. Was Jesus intending to marry her?? And the only thing you disagreed with was the scripture I quoted. When you say you are marrying someone, you should know who you are marrying. Building marriage on fraud in the name of been smart will lead that union in a shipwreck. It's better both parties are opened to each other before they sign the dotted lines and enter marriage with all their hearts having nothing to fear or keep telling lies to cover up some stuffs rather than finding out you really don't know the person you married. I'd be heartbroken to find out that I married a stranger. Everything you've said is based on fear of what may happen if he knows the truth. 1 John 4:18 comes to mind. It reads: There is no fear in love. But perfect love casts out fear: because fear has torment. Your stance can be likened to justifying Peter's denial of Jesus. 3 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Things Your Fiancé/ husband Is Better Off Not Knowing. by Nobody: 1:50pm On May 28, 2015 |
babyosisi: ![]() ![]() ![]() Guys: how many abortions have u sponsored? ![]() ![]() ABORTION SPONSORS ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() 2 Likes |
Re: Things Your Fiancé/ husband Is Better Off Not Knowing. by Nobody: 1:50pm On May 28, 2015 |
babyosisi: In this story they were on borrowed time. I think he divorced her because he was tired of her not because of her infidelity. I however agree that the past should remain in the past except it has any bearing on the present or the future. |
Re: Things Your Fiancé/ husband Is Better Off Not Knowing. by Nobody: 1:50pm On May 28, 2015 |
9jatatafo: There was a day in church and a thought popped into my head What if a scroll appears on the screen detailing the thoughts ,imaginations and actions of every single man or woman in that church Race go tear |
Re: Things Your Fiancé/ husband Is Better Off Not Knowing. by RuuDie(m): 1:51pm On May 28, 2015 |
babyosisi: You seriously believe this...!? |
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