Nairalanders, I need mature and real people opinion here.

I am a banker, 32, married with two kids, boy and girl. My wife works with a MDA in abuja while I work out from Nassarawa. I rented a 2 bedroom flat for them in Lugbe, abuja while i visit every weekend. I love her and love the kids however I notice we dont agree on a lot of things, mostly financial matters. she prefer i spend all on her and her kids and whenevr i am broke, she will gladly lend me cash. I dont ve ish with that and i ve been enjoying it for years now. I cheat on her but i dont see it as cheating but rather caring for my emotional needs. I have talked her into coming to stay in lafia with me before but i noticed she is very comfortable with her job and i dont want to be the reason for career truncation/ dissatisfaction in her life.

i decide to live my life in my own way; strategically sleeping with other ladies as need be. recently, i asked my colleague out. a lady banker, same level. for 3 months now, we have been hot and i can no longer touch or tolerate my wife. my colleague recently took in for me but we took care of it. i am scared as she is madly in love with me and she is available. I am also madly in love with her. i am choosing her over my wife right now. how can I solve this.

Guys I love her, dont tell me to leave her. we enjoy sex together in a way I dont with my wife. Just give your honest opinion to help those that may find themselves in my place someday.

Thank u.

Bruh......Take My Advice....Leave that Woman and Face your Wife.....even if you don't love your wife anymore, do it for the Kids......

Staying in a relationship with this other woman will surely Yield Negative Results

I just discovered that you have already made up your mind on what to do,that is marrying your colleague or making her your sex mate or your baby mama..so why have you decided to stress us out with this advice thingy?

I don't think you need the advice, we will take your advice "don't tell me to leave her"

I see you are in need of suggestions on how to break the news to your wife. I have none sorry

You said 'don't tell me to leave her' so I won't tell you anything.I pity the kids you didn't think about before involving yourself with other women.

You've already made up your mind not to leave her so you know the right thing to do. But if you need any advice I will say tell your wife the truth and keep your home. The sex thing will soon fade.

Good very soon another man with pot belly will drink alemo, tie towel in your wife's apartment and take care of the brain box you left in Abuja, at least need to be serviced, then your children will call the man dady while they call you uncle. Lozzzzz

"I cheat on her but i dont see it as cheating but
rather caring for my emotional needs." mr man, when that sweet new babe is also after two, u ll be same reason to "care for your emotional need" pls don't say I did not warn you oo, I sence danger. just my opinion

Ur own happiness shld b ur priority.. stick to whatever /whoever makes u happy... follow ur mind sir...

My advise would've been that you should leave the strange woman, but you've already said "don't tell me to leave her".

but remember, old wine was once a new good testy wine, time is the difference. Am sure your wife once test good and pleasant to you sexually, emotionally and otherwise. After two kids, do you expect her to remain 100% sexually active? Didn't you see those signs & discussed it with her before marriage?? If you have issues with your family (wife) and taking another woman is the only option, what is the assurance that your new found love would not behave the same way after giving birth to two or three kids

jumping from one woman to another is not the solution to marital problem, men who engages in such always live to regret it.

SOLUTION: engage your wife in a constructive, revealing talk.

Don't be such an Askhole!

Asking for advice you don't wanna adhere to? Puh-leeze!

"Dont leave her"

Nina is the colleague right?

You will reap what you sow.

If you truly do not want to be with your wife then leave her. Children do not thrive well in broken and unhappy homes. You can't possibly look your son in the eye and say treat your women like I treat your mother. You can't look in your daughter in the eye and say pick a man like your daddy.

You do not respect your wife nor the vows you have made to her. If there were issues..you should sat down with her and try to communicate. If that didn't work you should have seek professional help.

Every marriage has issues and no marriage is perfect. I promise you that your next marriage will have issues as well. You need to develop some problem solving skills so that you don't leave every woman that "makes" you unhappy. No one can make you happy but Allah. You will always be disappointed as long as you live because humans make mistakes and aren't perfect. Everyone has flaws and some serious than others.

If this lady can cheat with you while you married what make you think she will be loyal when you married her? A self respecting lady will not lower herself even for some konji. I am sure she is aware that you are married or has a mate.

If you truly do not want to be with your wife....leave her. You can still care for your kids and do right by your kids.

Only u don advice urself finish say u nor go fit leave her, wey tin u say mk we cm talk. Jst so u no dat wat so ever a man sow, dat he shall reap

Mysweetnina

Nina go sour one day

Nana go take over

sorry sir, opinion closed for the week

check back on monday

Slimzjoe:
Bruh......Take My Advice....Leave that Woman and Face your Wife.....even if you don't love your wife anymore, do it for the Kids......

Staying in a relationship with this other woman will surely Yield Negative Results

True

Be with your wife. Ur colleague may seem gud at first bt ur bringin bad luck to urslf...TRUST ME

Hhmmmmmmm....dis is not a good one

Dis is wat apns wen u live seperated frm ur family, ur wife...Hav told couples...don't marry to become single..if u want to be single den stay single and stop exposing innocent kids to one parent system......

Anyways to ur story...drop ur illicit affair dude, and reunite ur home...bring ur famz together, for the sake of ur kids dey re too young to be exposed dis madness, ....womanliness to be honest with u don't hav different, Janet cunt is the same as Sara's if there is any difference, it's a very small one, it's the same utility u derive frm either women so why bother cheat, it's jst dat u men re insatiable and want to taste everything...

Btw.. ......wake up frm dat ur slump and face ur home, put ur home together and drop dat affair...

I know cases like this, you will later find out you made the biggest mistake in your life. I just pray i get the opportunity to tell you "I told you so" Marriage is not Happily ever after, you work hard for it. Loser

Its infatuation and if you aren't careful the babe would want ro get serious with the relationship. Meaning you will be considering having two wives, since you don't wanna leave your wife. BTW this your new catch could have / would still charm you in the long run. Take it or leave it!

I don't give advice to married people

If U Love Her Dat Much Y Nt Marry Her Nw.Yeye Dey Smell

Shame on you.

May hail stones rain down on your hollow bald head.

Puna dey sweet u koh?

u never see anything until the so called bank u are working in sacks d two of u.. ur eye go clear..
dont u know dating a colleague always back fires...



as far as am concerned.. u dont have a problem with ur wife.. all u need is time for u to be together.. u will know there are lots of sweet things u are yet to discover with ur wife.

Op, having gone through your post and responses here, I think I will advise you as a man to watch what you are doing because you are just trying to destroy your home because of selfishness.

Yes, you found her hot and wouldn't want anyone here to tell you to stop goes to show how low minded you are.

God blessed you with 2 kids and also a working woman trying to help you raise your home. Let me tell you, any single lady knowing fully well that a man is married and still want to have him at all cost is equally the worst demon on earth. Don't you love those kids? As a father, would things of the flesh take over your life? If your wife is enjoying her work where she is and you are enjoying your work where you are now, why must you get lost because of another woman's hole?

Remember that the devil you know is better than the angels out there.

It sounds good with her now, when you finally bring her in as your second wife, NOTE, you will NEVER EVER have peace as she will destroy you, even find a way to kill your kids from your present wife. Resist this lady in your office no matter how she has been servicing you. Intimacy is NEVER the only thing that keep relationship going. You can loose your job today, note this, she can never EVER stay with you as she will get out of your life forever.

Think twice.

Family first,though people fall out of love,op try$find a way to start loving your wife again even if because of the kids future.

the kids dat get caught up in this kind of mess. smh u wud soon be tired of ur banker babe. too

OP, In fact, I am ashamed of your person as a man.As a banker, you ought to be transparently honest both at home front and at work.You supposed to be an example to the society hence bankers are been respected and accorded respect in the law court whenever they come to testify.

Do not destroy your home because of that evil woman. I know you are spiritually blinded right now by eating that forbidden fruit and when your eyes opens, you will realize what Adam did when Eve gave him that forbidden fruit.

Note that a stubborn fly follows a dead body to the grave.

Copy this post herein, make copy of it and keep with you, Come One Day you will look for it, if you chose either side of the decision you decide to take in life.